“Can I get you some more coffee, Mr. Hummel? I just bought some imported Belgian Mocha I thought you'd love. Do you want a scone, Mr. Hummel? I baked them this morning with you in mind…” Blaine mumbles, a perfect mimic of Kurt's new assistant's voice.

“What's crawled up your gorgeous ass today?” Kurt asks as Blaine sulks in the empty chair next to Kurt's desk.

“I don't like your new assistant,” Blaine pouts, glaring at the half-eaten blueberry scone and the fresh mug of coffee Kurt places on his desk.

“What? Tony?” Kurt chuckles at his husband's deepening moue. “He's a nice kid.”

“He's a kiss ass, and he's making a play for you.”

“What?” Kurt chokes on the next bite of his scone. “He's not even out of high school yet.”

“That doesn't mean he's not out to steal my man.”

“Oh, Blaine” - Kurt waves off Blaine's argument – “he's harmless.”

Blaine scoffs. “Yeah. I've heard that one before.”

“Yup, you have,” Kurt agrees dryly, “except last time, I was the one telling you that I didn't like someone, and you were telling me they were harmless. And do you remember what happened next?”

“I don't know. It's all a little blurry,” Blaine grumbles. “But things are different now.”

Kurt folds his hands underneath his chin and fixes his husband with humorless eyes. “How?”

“We're married,” Blaine argues.

“We were dating at the time,” Kurt counters.

“Well…Tony's more than half your age.”

Kurt gasps. “Bite your tongue!”

“This should bother you, Kurt!” Blaine insists.

“It should,” Kurt agrees, readying to take a sip from his mug of Belgian Mocha. “It really, really should.”

“But it doesn't, does it?” Blaine asks, sinking back in his chair in defeat.

“Nope,” Kurt says, breathing in the rich, chocolate aroma of his coffee. “Not in the slightest.”