“Elliott says he’ll catch up with us later for dinner” - Kurt relays the message, shoving his phone into the back pocket of his jeans - “but he wants me to let you know that you’re his hero.”

Blaine can hear the eye roll in Kurt’s statement, but that doesn’t stop him from beaming with pride over the fact that he’s doing something that Mr. Tattooed-and-Pierced-to-his-eyeballs Elliott “Starchild” Gilbert has yet to do.

“Well, I won’t let it go to my head…ba-dum-bum,” Blaine says, seizing the opportunity to make a vulgar pun.

“Ha…ha,” Kurt replies dryly, but he smiles at his adorkable best friend anyway.

It was Elliott who actually recommended the shop that they’re in – Andromeda on St. Mark’s Place. It’s smaller than some of the other studios they’ve gone to in New York, but it’s clean, and Blaine is impressed by the art on the walls. But most important of all, it’s a place they haven’t been to before.

If Blaine makes a fool out of himself today, they’re never coming back.

Kurt starts thumbing through an old issue of Skin Deep as Blaine flips through the pages of a more recent Inked Magazine the tattoo parlor has in the waiting room…but Blaine isn’t reading a word. He tried when he first opened it, but they all seem to glop together into a single run-on sentence, one that he’s not sure is even written in English.

“So, you’re sure you want to do this?” Kurt asks, trying to sound casual as he scans an article titled Fifty of the Greatest Rock Star Tattoos.

“Of course, I do,” Blaine says, trying for the hundredth time to convince him. “I would think that you of all people, with your appreciation for fashion, its rich history, and its kooky trends, would understand this.”

Kurt dramatically flips to the next page. “You know I’m not buying that, right?”

“Come on, Kurt. You can’t tell me that you’ve never considered getting one.”

“Blaine” - Kurt turns in his seat to face Blaine, putting a hand on Blaine’s magazine and lowering it to look into his eyes - “I am telling you honestly that I have never, ever, ever, ever considered getting my dick pierced.”

“It’s not the whole thing. Just the head,” Blaine jokes.

“Pfft.” Kurt sits back in his chair. “That’s bad enough. Even the thought of it makes me queasy.”

“And yet you came with me.”

Kurt tilts his head in Blaine’s direction and smiles. “Of course, I did.” He puts a hand on Blaine’s knee, and Blaine puts his hand over it. “I always will.”

Even though the shop seems relatively empty, they’ve been waiting for forty-five minutes, which is fine by Blaine. He’s already decided that he’s perfectly happy to wait for another forty-five minutes, but the platinum blonde receptionist behind the counter calls his name.

“Blaine? Blaine Anderson?”

“Yes?” Blaine launches to his feet, dropping the magazine on his seat. Lopsided, it slides off the chair and lands with a noisy clap on the floor.

“We’ve had a cancelation, so we can fit you in right now if you want.”

Blaine shoots an anxious look at Kurt bending over to pick up the magazine. Kurt gives him a supportive smile and a thumbs up.

“Great,” Blaine confirms. “The sooner the better.”

Kurt stands and, with a hand on Blaine’s shoulder, pushes him forward toward the counter.

“That also means you get to choose who does your piercing today,” the receptionist says as if that’s the most fantastic news. “Micah or Ashley.”

Ashley - a curvy but petite young woman with shoulder length, crayon red hair, and eyes so shockingly turquoise that Kurt has a hard time believing they’re natural - waves at them with a bright, perfectly penciled, black-lipped smile, while her coworker Micah – wavy brown hair pulled away from his piercing green eyes and back into a ponytail, wearing a black Skrillex tank top and jeans that are more holes than fabric - slowly looks Blaine over from his dark curls to his thick boots, giving him, and only him, a flirtatious half-grin. Blaine bites his lip and looks away, cheeks turning red more from knowing that Kurt’s going to react than from anything close to attraction.

And Blaine loves that. He loves the protective side of his best friend.

Kurt doesn’t disappoint. He aims a razor-edged gaze at Micah and fumes. Kurt can’t stand obvious leering. Blaine’s not too fond of it either, but it’s also nice to imagine that the reason behind Kurt’s claws coming out might include a hint of jealousy.

Maybe a little.

Blaine can dream.

“Ashley. He wants Ashley,” Kurt jumps in, looking from the smiling young lady back to Blaine for his approval. “Ashley, right?”

“Sure,” Blaine says with a shy smile for the woman who’s about to get up close and personal with his junk in about two minutes. “I’ll go with Ashley. Ashley’s fine.”

“You know” - Micah steps forward, arms crossed, superiorly unimpressed with the outcome of this decision - “since this is Blaine’s appointment, and Blaine’s going to be the one getting the piercing, Blaine should be the one who picks who he’s going to be comfortable with.”

Kurt’s eyes turn from their usual cool grey-blue to unforgiving steel, and Blaine’s smile disappears.

“I am.” Blaine loops an arm through Kurt’s. “That’s why I’m going with Ashley. Ashley makes my best friend comfortable, ergo she makes me comfortable. And thank you so much for helping cement that decision for me.”

Micah’s smirk turns into a scowl directed mostly at Kurt. With a shake of her head, Ashley walks in between her coworker and her customer.

“Turn it down, Micah. It’s Blaine’s dick I need out, not yours.” She motions to a door at the opposite end of the shop. “Right this way, gentlemen.”

Blaine immediately follows Ashley, but Kurt doesn’t leave without flashing Micah a triumphant grin.

“So, do you want to have this piercing centered?” Ashley asks, leaving the drama in the waiting room with her sour-faced associate. “Or off to the side?”

“What’s the difference?” Blaine asks.

“Well, some people think that centered is the most aesthetically pleasing” – She opens the door and leads Blaine and Kurt inside – “but off to the side is usually more comfortable, especially if you’re uncut.”

“Uncut’s not an issue,” Kurt remarks, as if the status of Blaine’s foreskin is common knowledge, “but considering the jeans you wear, Blaine, I think I’d go for comfort.”

“Yeah,” Blaine agrees, sounding less confident about his decision with every step, “I think you’re right.”

The room they enter is not much different from the private work spaces in other studios they’ve been in. The walls are painted white, with bright lights overhead - the optimum conditions for piercing, Kurt assumes, since most spots they go to have this exact same set up. It gave him the creeps the first time he got a piercing. With the vinyl upholstered table in the center and the surgical-looking instruments on silver trays nearby, it reminded him too much of a hospital examination room. Kurt doesn’t have a positive history with hospitals, not after his mother’s cancer and his father’s heart attack, but this constant exposure is helping him to overcome that.

Who knew the unexpected side-effect body piercing would have?

“I’m going to need you to lay down here and open your fly,” Ashley says, patting the table as she walks past toward a counter laid out with tools that look like they would feature prominently in the Marquis de Sade’s bedroom. Kurt is no stranger to piercings, and neither is Blaine, but one large device Ashley picks up that looks kind of like an industrial hole-punch makes Kurt want to hurl.

“Do I…need to take my pants off?” Blaine asks.

“Nah,” she says, nonchalantly snapping on a pair of black latex gloves (Kurt notices that the brand of gloves she uses is Black Widow, which seems strangely foreboding), not looking at all concerned that she’s about to poke a hole through the most sensitive part of Blaine’s body. “I don’t need you to drop trou. I just need access to your penis.”

“I bet you haven’t had a girl tell you that before,” Kurt chuckles.

“Not in the last twenty-four hours,” Blaine comes back quickly.

Kurt’s laughing stops so fast, Blaine can hear it skid to a halt, and Ashley snickers.

“Also, I’m going to need you to put this on.” She lays a square, blue drape over his crotch. “Make sure your penis goes through the hole.”

“O…kay.” Blaine holds it up and looks at it. It has a hole cut smack dab in the center. Blaine’s face goes sheet white when he sees it. He puts it aside and reaches down to undo his trousers. His hands shake as he loosens his belt. Kurt puts a hand over his.

“It’s okay,” he says, gently shooing Blaine’s hands away. “I’ll get that. You look like you’re about to be sick.”

“I think I am going to be sick,” Blaine admits.

“It’s going to be fine,” Kurt consoles him. “Ashley here is a professional. Aren’t you, Ashley?”

“That’s right,” Ashley says sincerely. “This will only take about half a second, and then it’ll be over. I’ve been doing this a long time, and I haven’t had any complaints. Lots of satisfied customers…and partners.” Ashley winks at Kurt, and this time, Kurt’s hands start to shake.

“Okay, so we’re going to be fitting you with a 10 gauge hoop today, but after it heals, you can consider stretching it to a larger gauge if that’s what you prefer. Now, I’m going to tell you what I’m doing while I’m doing it.”

“Do you have to?” Blaine gulps.

“Here…look at me, Blaine. Look in my eyes.” Kurt grabs a rolling stool from the corner and pulls it up to the table. When he sits in it, he’s eye level with Blaine, and able to pull his focus. Blaine turns his head to look at Kurt, eyes wide with alarm, but so trusting, as if everything wrong in the world will be okay as long as Kurt is there beside him.

Kurt knows how that feels. He feels the same way about Blaine.

“You’re going to feel me poke around a little bit,” Ashley warns him.

Blaine winces. “Yup. I definitely feel that.”

“I know that feels sharp. Just one more second…”

“What can I do to take your mind off it?” Kurt asks. “Do you want me to sing to you? Tell you a joke? Perform a soliloquy?”

“Kiss me?” Blaine asks, giggling nervously. That giggle of Blaine’s is dangerous - equal parts sweet and tempting. Kurt has no defense against it, especially now when Blaine is begging him for comfort.

“Here” - Kurt slips his hand into Blaine’s - “hold my hand. Squeeze it as hard as you want.”

“This is going to be a little cold…”

Blaine manages to remain stoic, staring into Kurt’s eyes while Ashley cleans him up.

“I’m going to insert a receiving tube into your urethra. This is actually going to be the worst part,” she explains in a sympathetic voice.

“Oh…okay.” Suddenly, Blaine hisses and squeezes his eyes shut.

“Don’t jump,” she says. “Hold still…take a deep breath in and let it out slowly…”

“Did you want to watch what she’s doing?” Kurt asks. “Eliminate some of the suspense?”

“Not one bit,” Blaine says.

“I wouldn’t either.”

“No, I mean…I like doing this, looking into your eyes like this.”

“Yeah,” Kurt admits, re-considering giving Blaine that kiss. It would only be one kiss, and in the aid of a friend. What harm could it do? “So do I.”

Kurt has no clue what’s going on south of Blaine’s equator. He can guess, but he has no interest in turning his eyes away to check if he’s right. He sees Blaine’s lower lip wobble, and then his eyes shut again, his entire face pinched with pain.

“It’s okay.” Kurt rests his forehead against Blaine’s, giving him more of an anchor than just his hand to hold on to. “You’re doing great.”

“And you’re done,” Ashley announces. Kurt sighs, relieved and disappointed. He doesn’t like seeing Blaine in pain, but he wishes that could have lasted a second or two longer. When will he have another reason to hold Blaine’s hand and stare into his eyes?

Kurt can think of one, but for the sake of their friendship, he can’t entertain it.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Ashley asks, chuckling ahead of time since she can guess what Blaine’s answer will be.

“On, no. Not at all,” Blaine tosses out with comical sarcasm. Kurt turns his head and laughs.

“Kurt,” Blaine complains, “it’s not funny.”

“You’re right. It’s not,” Kurt agrees with a snort.

“Just so you know, it’s going to be sore,” Ashley warns.

“Maybe you should have worn looser pants,” Kurt kids, his body warming when Blaine rewards him with a weak smile.

“I don’t think I own any.”

“I’ll take you to Macy’s after this. I think they’re having a sale.”

“And it’s going to bleed,” Ashley continues, smiling at the two men she can’t honestly believe aren’t more than friends, “so expect that. It could bleed up to seven days, but I’ve never heard of anyone bleeding for more than one or two. Don’t get freaked out if you wake up in the morning and your dressing is drenched. It’s completely normal.”

Blaine swallows so hard it sounds like it hurt. Kurt runs a hand through Blaine’s hair, scratching lightly at his scalp to calm him.

“Great,” Blaine responds in a wobbly voice, leaning in to Kurt’s touch, “because we all know how much I love blood.”

“Don’t worry,” Kurt says. “I’ll sleep with you if you want so you don’t flip your shit in the morning.”

“Thank you,” Blaine mouths so as not to talk over Ashley’s instructions.

“You’re going to want to clean it with sea salt water several times a day, especially after you urinate. And here’s the fun part – you may end up being a sit to pee-er from now on.”

“Yeah,” Blaine says with a hiccup that wanted to be a laugh but failed, “I’ve heard that.”

“You can have sex, but you’re definitely going to want to wait until the soreness is gone. And you’re going to want to wear a condom while you do for the next two months.”

“I don’t think that’s going to be too much of an issue, unless I need to wear one while I masturbate.”

“No” - Ashley gives Kurt another side-eye glance that makes his cheeks pink - “I think you should be good then.”

Blaine nods. “Kurt? H-how does it look?”

“Oh…uh…you want me to…okay…” Kurt turns his head to take a peek. It’s not that Kurt hasn’t seen Blaine’s penis before. They change in front of one another constantly; have showered together out of necessity, especially in the middle of the winter when they know the water heater is only going to give them enough hot water for one shower. They’ve also had sex together once, lost their virginities to one another, and that’s why looking is so difficult. Kurt has carried the memory of that first time with him every day since. It’s marked him like one of the many tattoos he wears on his body - literally. He and Blaine commemorated it by having the date inked underneath their armpits, in a spot where they’d have to lift up their arms and look in a mirror to see. On that not oft glimpsed patch of skin, it could be kept private and close to their hearts. But Kurt knew why Blaine wanted this piercing. He’d accidentally stumbled across the articles bookmarked on Blaine’s laptop. Kurt knew it had nothing to do with fashion…or with him.

Ashley holds off on putting the final strip of gauze around Blaine’s piercing so that Kurt can look and report back.

“It looks…good,” Kurt says - a nice, neutral comment. “She did a great job.”

Kurt always thought that Blaine’s penis was beautiful – cut, and not intimidatingly large or thick. But with that piece of jewelry in it, it’s absolutely mouthwatering.

“Let me do up your jeans,” Kurt offers when Ashley finishes, but Blaine doesn’t let go of Kurt’s hand.

“Thank you,” he says, pulling slightly so Kurt will come closer, “for being here for me.”

Kurt smiles. He kisses Blaine on the forehead, lingering longer than usual when Blaine loops his arms around Kurt’s neck. “Blaine, no matter what, I’ll always be here for you.”