March 16, 2015, 7 p.m.
The Dance Teacher: You Lead, Ill Follow
T - Words: 2,225 - Last Updated: Mar 16, 2015 Story: Complete - Chapters: 2/? - Created: Feb 13, 2015 - Updated: Feb 13, 2015 89 0 0 0 0
Blaine stands stock still for a solid minute after Kurt disappears into the subway. The wind races underneath his coat, and a shiver chases it down his back. The heat in his body starts to leave him – a heat that Kurt put there with his arm around Blaines waist during their dances, and through the hand that held his. Blaine begins to walk, but not in the direction he came. Not towards home. He walks straight ahead to the subway terminal, following the footsteps of his dance teacher, the way he always did, the way he has become accustomed to doing. Blaine needs to tell Kurt something, even if he doesnt know exactly what yet. There's something important pressing inside his brain, cramming against his skull - something he knows will become clear when he lays eyes on Kurt again…and it cant wait.
Blaine breaks into a sprint when he hears the train pull in. Even above ground and a few feet away, he hears the conductor calling out the stop, and the alarm that signals the closing of the train doors, all before his foot touches the top step. By the time he rushes down the stairwell, the whoosh of air that comes with the departure of the train hits him full force. It blows back his coat, throws dust into his face, and Blaine has to stop a moment to shield his eyes. When the wind dies down, Blaine continues on, but its too late. The train is gone, and Blaine knows that Kurt is gone, too, on his way back to Bushwick.
Blaine slows his steps but he doesnt stop. He has to check and make sure, has to see with his own eyes that the platform is empty or hell never be able to leave the subway station and get on with his life.
Blaine is three steps from the bottom when he sees him, standing at the yellow line, staring straight ahead.
"Kurt?"
Kurts head snaps to the side to look at Blaine, his mouth hanging open in surprise. He definitely hadnt expected to see Blaine again so soon. He isnt prepared. He doesnt have time to readjust the expression on his face, and Blaine can tell by his tear-stained cheeks and his slightly runny nose that hes been crying.
"Oh! Blaine!" Kurt wipes away tears with shaking fingers. "Why are you…I didnt know you took this subway. I thought you lived uptown."
"I do…live uptown, that is." Blaine walks slowly over to Kurt, giving him time to get composed. "I just…I needed to ask you a question." Blaine points down the tunnel. "Did you miss your train?"
"Uh, yeah. Yeah, I guess I did," Kurt chuckles, nodding and sniffling, reaching in his pocket for a tissue. "Was that your question?"
"No." Blaine walks a step closer, fishing a packet of tissues from his pocket and handing them over. "I actually had a question about the Viennese Waltz we did a week ago."
Kurt accepts the tissues with a warm but tremulous smile, his brow furrowing.
"You have a question about that?" Kurt asks, separating a single tissue from the rest and patting beneath his eyes. "But, you did that waltz perfectly. In fact, that was the one dance you picked up off the bat."
"I know," Blaine says, voice shaking with nerves, "but I still have a question."
Kurt looks at Blaine, blue eyes wet with tears shining over the edge of his Kleenex, assessing how serious Blaine really was.
"Please," Blaine pleads, hands folded in front of him. "Its really important. I promise."
Kurt watches Blaine bounce a little on his feet, his eyes wide and playful, too adorable for words, and it wins Kurt over.
"I guess Ive got some time until the next train arrives." Kurt glances around at the empty platform. "Did you want to ask me here, or did you want to go back up to my studio?"
"Uh, your studio, if you dont mind." Blaine decides to take a risk, and in his chest, his heart starts up again.
"Lets go then." Kurt smiles, tilting his head in the direction of the staircase. He carefully puts the used tissue in his pocket and offers Blaine the remainder, which Blaine politely waves away.
"You keep them," Blaine says. "Just in case you need them again."
They walk in silence up the stairs and the short distance to the studio. Kurt has his keys in hand to unlock the door by the time they reach the foot of the steps. He holds the door open for Blaine, and then locks it behind them. He slips off his coat and puts it on the hook, which Blaine takes as a good sign. Kurt is getting comfortable. Hes willing to stay a while. Blaine takes his coat off, too, hanging it beside Kurts.
"So, what was your question?" Kurt asks. He doesn't switch on the overhead light, letting the light from outside fill the studio with its glow.
To Blaine, its kind of romantic.
Blaine holds out his hand to Kurt, ducking his eyes underneath his lashes, a shy grin on his lips.
"Would you dance with me?"
Kurt looks at Blaines hand outstretched and swallows lightly.
"Did you seriously ask me back here to dance with you?" Kurt asks. For a second, Blaine thinks Kurt might get angry at him for keeping him from his train, or for wasting his time.
"Yes," Blaine replies plainly, doing his best to appear confident while he bites his tongue hard to keep from apologizing, backpedaling, walking out of the studio and never looking back.
Kurt stares at Blaines hand a second longer, his face indecipherable, and yet, the confusion in his eyes very clear.
"Alright." Kurts eyes flick up to meet Blaines gaze. "But just…give me a second."
Kurt walks across the dance floor to the stereo in the corner. He chooses a song, and when it starts, Blaine notices within the first four notes that Kurt didnt put on a waltz.
"I hope youll forgive my song selection," Kurt says, walking back over to Blaine, who's pleasantly stunned when the first subtle strains of At Last, sung in Etta Jamess sultry alto, hits the air. "I know its not appropriate for the waltz, but…" Kurts eyes drift up to Blaines face and he smiles, "I thought maybe you wouldnt mind the change?"
Kurt says it like a question, but he really isnt asking. He knows that Blaine didnt come back to discuss waltzes. Truthfully, Kurt had kind of hoped Blaine would come back. It was a long shot, and when the train pulled away without him on it, for about thirty seconds, he felt like a fool. He was going to stand on that platform alone for an additional forty-five minutes. He was going to get to his apartment late, and the only living creature in the world who would notice or care would be his cat, Verve, pissed because he missed his dinner.
Kurt slips his hand into Blaines and does a half-spin into his embrace. Blaine smiles at the man in his arms, who adjusts their stance so Blaine can lead, though it doesnt really matter who leads and who follows this time. That immediate feeling of safety and comfort rolls through Blaines body. If he ever had a doubt that this is where he belongs, that this is where he should be, those doubts get squashed and shoved away.
"Can I ask you another question?" Blaine asks hesitantly, almost unwilling to break the silence, but he holds on tight to this moment they have in case it doesnt come around again, in case this is where it ends.
"Youre full of questions today, arent you?" Kurt laughs uneasily. "Sure. Go ahead."
Blaine bounces back and forth between questions in his head, but settles on the most important one – the one he thinks can answer all his questions at once.
"Why were you crying? On the platform?"
Kurt drops his head and sighs.
"I cant tell you," he says, regaining his impeccable posture.
"Why not?"
"Because it doesnt change anything. Because…" Kurt takes a deep breath in and lets it out. "Because youre getting married."
Kurts answer doesnt just confirm Blaines suspicions. It takes his breath away.
"To tell you the truth" - Blaine comes to his confession apprehensively, and he hopes, tactfully - "Im having second thoughts. I actually have been for a while."
"Well, thats convenient, isnt it?" Kurt snaps, bitter, his back becoming rigid, unyielding in Blaines arms. Blaine knows hes struck a nerve, but he cant stop now. Last chance, he thinks. Hell regret it if he doesnt at least try.
"Its actually really not convenient," Blaine says sincerely, his eyes not leaving Kurts face for a second no matter how many times Kurts eyes dart uncomfortably away. "In fact, some days I wish I could just go along with this wedding and make everybody happy, and be happy about it myself, but its getting harder and harder."
Kurt drops his defensive attitude at Blaines change in tone.
"Im sorry," Kurt says. "I didnt mean to sound angry. I may have some experience with broken engagements." Blaine nods, feeling bad for pressing him. "You know, a lot of people get cold feet before their wedding. But they love each other, they get married, and it all irons itself out."
"I thought about that, Kurt, but whats wrong between Dave and me, its been going wrong for a while now," Blaine admits. "I think…I think I proposed to him to try and make things better, but in a lot of ways, it made them worse. Besides, thats not what weddings should be for."
Kurt doesnt comment right away, letting Blaines words settle in his brain before he speaks.
"But how do you know?" he asks. "How do you know your marriage isnt going to work?"
"Dave and I have been together forever…since high school, and even with all our problems, I seriously thought he was the only person who was ever going to love me." Kurt gasps softly, squeezing Blaines shoulder where his hand rests on it. "But just as I was giving up hope that there was somebody else who might be a better match for me, something incredible happened."
"What?" Kurt leans in curiously, thoroughly invested in Blaines answer. "What happened?"
"Well, eight weeks ago…I walked into your studio…"
Kurt bites his lip and focuses his gaze out the window, his cheeks blushing rose. He pinches his lip hard to keep from smiling, but he cant stop, and its beginning to make his cheeks hurt.
"You know, the only reason why I thought I was safe from you was because you were engaged," Kurt says. "What am I supposed to do about you now?"
"You could, maybe, consider giving me a chance?" Blaine asks, trembling at how much closer Kurt has gotten, that the hand resting on his shoulder has wrapped completely around his torso, and the hand in his holds on tight.
"This is ridiculous, you know." Kurt shakes his head. "I mean, weve only known each other, what, a little more than a month? Maybe two?"
"True," Blaine agrees, his heart racing at the thought that Kurt might consider a relationship with him, that after all these weeks of pining and daydreaming, this man he has a crush on (and yes, its a good, old-fashioned, honest to God crush), could become his, "but, if I didnt feel like there could be something between us, I wouldnt even think about imposing on you. I wouldnt ask you to give me a shot, especially under the circumstances."
Kurts smile grows wider, which seems impossible since it already reaches his ears.
"I cant believe Im actually going along with this." Kurt giggles. "Just, please tell me you guys…"
"We postponed the wedding," Blaine cuts in, "pretty much indefinitely. Weeks ago…when my fiancé moved out."
"So you guys really have been talking this over, huh?" Kurt asks, not sounding entirely convinced to Blaine.
"Its not just our feelings for each other," Blaine explains. "We both want different things out of life. He got a job offer in Chicago, one that hes always wanted, and he took it without talking with me first. But my dreams are here in New York – always have been. And then theres children…"
"What about children?" Kurt asks nervously, knowing that this could make or break a relationship, even at the start.
"Well, I…Ive always wanted children," Blaine says. "And it seems that Dave…not so much."
Kurt chews on his cheek, trying not to look too relieved.
"I want children someday," he says.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
Kurt glances at the clock on the wall.
"You know Ive missed my train," he says.
"Im sorry," Blaine answers.
"And…weve kind of stopped dancing."
Blaine looks at them standing together, arms around each other, foreheads close.
"I hadnt noticed."
Kurts eyes focus on Blaines lips as he tips his head forward.
"You know, this probably wont work out," Kurt mutters. "Ill just be a rebound, or you and Dave will realize youre meant for each oth-"
Kurt doesnt finish. Blaines lips find his, and as much as Kurt detests being cut off, even with a kiss, he cant find it in himself to mind, especially with Blaines hand on his back pulling him closer, another cupping his face, his thumb brushing across his cheek. Blaine starts to pull away, but Kurt murmurs no, kissing Blaine back while Blaine tries not to laugh.
"So, does this mean youre willing to give me a chance?" Blaine whispers, breaking away from their kiss only far enough to ask.
"Yes, Ill give you a chance," Kurt says, returning eagerly to Blaines lips.