Nick and Jeff laid side by side on Nick's bed, Nick's lips swollen from a hundred kisses – each one a message, an apology, or a promise – sorry for not telling you how I felt sooner…I promise to make you happy from this day forward…I'm so happy we're here together. Jeff held Nick's hand, twining their fingers together, enjoying the feeling of Nick's soft palm sliding against his rough, calloused skin.

Nick ran gentle fingertips down Jeff's cheek, needing a reminder that this was real. Jeff turned his face and kissed Nick's fingers, smiling when Nick gasped at the touch of his lips against his skin. Jeff had been Nick's best friend for as long as he could remember. Nick thought a lot about the day they met. It was one of his favorite memories. They were just children, but Nick, in his own way, had fallen in love with Jeff, without understanding or reservation.

Nick's feelings for Jeff had always been complicated. Jeff was such an easy going guy. Everybody got along with Jeff, even the so-called super cool, popular kids, and yet Jeff picked Nick, first and foremost, over everyone else. Nick loved Jeff, admired Jeff, was often extremely jealous of Jeff. It never dawned on Nick that Jeff might actually like him as more than a friend. He had seen Jeff with girlfriends before, endured watching them hold each other, watching them whisper sweetly and privately…watching them kiss.

It killed Nick to watch Jeff kiss someone else, but Nick thought Jeff had to be an incredible kisser.

Nick bit his lip, thinking that yes, Jeff was an incredible kisser.

“What are you thinking, Nicky?” Jeff asked, taking Nick's hand in his and pressing tender kisses into his palm, onto his wrist. Nick trembled at the light contact. No one had ever touched him that way. He had been saving himself for Jeff. Even when he thought holding on to that dream was foolish, he held out hope.

“I…I don't understand, Jeff,” Nick said. “If you felt this way, why didn't you ask me out before?”

Jeff sighed, closing his eyes in thought as he breathed against Nick's skin.

“I wish things were different,” Jeff confessed. “I wish I had more than just myself to give you.”

“You know things like that don't matter to me,” Nick said, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend and holding him closer. “This is all I want…just you and me together. Besides, if that's the case, then I don't actually have anything to give you, either. If my parents ever find out about us, they'd probably pull my trust fund…or worse.”

Jeff swallowed hard. He knew exactly what ‘worse' meant. It was no secret that Nick's parents were extremely homophobic. They had always been suspicious of Nick and Jeff's enduring friendship, and regardless of Nick's constant reassurances that they were only friends, Nick had been threatened on numerous occasions.

Nick knew exactly what was waiting for him if his parents ever found out about Jeff.

The Christian gay-to-straight conversion camp they had picked out was one of the strictest in the country.

“You did get my first kiss, though,” Nick said, placing a bashful peck to the hollow of Jeff's throat.

“I'm sorry I didn't have that to give you,” Jeff said with a regretful sigh.

“Don't,” Nick said. “Don't be sorry. You're here with me now. That's all that matters to me.”

Jeff toyed with the piercing in his tongue as he considered Nick's words. His fingers traced little circles around Nick's shoulder as he fought for the courage to continue.

“I really only have one thing that's mine to give.” Jeff looked deep into Nick's whiskey-colored eyes. “I kind of think of it as a gift…and I'm hoping you'll accept it.”

Nick stared into Jeff's open and honest face, his brow furrowed in confusion. Jeff's warm, innocent eyes suddenly looked sinful and wanting, and Nick immediately understood.

“You…you mean…” he stammered. “But, I thought…with Victoria, at least.”

A mental image of the girl considered the belle of Crawford Country Day sprang vividly to mind. Even by Nick's exacting standards, Victoria LaFontaine was the epitome of a classic, Renaissance beauty – silky, honey blond hair, a bow shaped mouth, perfectly plump lips, and blessedly developed for a girl of sixteen. But Victoria wasn't only beautiful. The thing that had struck Nick most was how enamored she had been with Jeff, how close they seemed, how they complimented one another. They made an undeniable match. Nick had been certain that for the year Jeff dated her, he had lost his beloved Jeff to his true soul mate.

Jeff chuckled.

“I know that's what you thought, but no…and I'm sorry I didn't tell you the truth.” Jeff turned fully on his side to face Nick. “So, how about it, Nicky?” Jeff's voice dropped a bit, his whisper a velvet caress over Nick's suddenly heated skin. “Do you want to be with me?”

Nick, overwhelmed in the face of what Jeff was offering, tried to diffuse the tension through humor.

“Would it be tacky to say I bought you the same gift?” Nick asked.

Jeff laughed, inching closer, bringing Nick's body in tighter with the pull of his arm around Nick's waist.

“No, Nick,” he said, lips hovering just out of Nick's reach. “In fact, I think it's beautiful. I think you're beautiful…and I want to remember tonight for the rest of my life…”