youmovemeblaine
Oct. 16, 2012, 12:47 p.m.
I love the rain the most
One rainy afternoon Kurt gets in a serious funk about his unrequited feelings for Blaine but then some guitar tunes turn his whole world upside down.
T - Words: 2,344 - Last Updated: Oct 16, 2012 821 1 0 1 Categories: Cotton Candy Fluff, Songfics, Characters: Blaine Anderson, Kurt Hummel,
Author's Notes: I wrote this a few days after 2x12 Silly Love Songs but never published it (except on on LJ ages back ;)). But after "The Break Up" I felt the need to go back and re-read it to feel better. Someone left me a lovely message about it today, that was the final push to put it on here. Constructive criticism is very appreciated but please be gentle, I'm practically a fic newbie. The song that inspired me to write the story is "I love the rain the most" by Joe Purdy; I recommend listening to it while reading and maybe even head to rainymood(.)com to overlay it. I think it sounds beautiful that way and I listened to the combined sound on loop while writing.
It is Sunday and one of those days in late summer when the rain suddenly pours down from the sky so hard that it seems the whole world will drown in the amount of water that is covering the sky in endless streams. Torn and ragged clouds chase across the horizon and a warm and wild wind gallops through the leaves of the ancient, big trees on the campus. Lightning bolts shoot over the dark sky, illuminating the scenery like paparazzi flashes while thunder roars in the background as if to indicate that nature isn’t quite content to let fall take over yet.
Kurt, who was interrupted in his art history study-session by this unexpected thunderstorm, is leaning at the window of his room at Dalton Academy and watches the raindrops hitting the delicate lead-bordered window tiles. He couldn’t focus on his books anyways, his mind kept wandering back to the hobbit-sized boy with the curly, dark hair, the velvet voice, beautiful amber eyes, and that energetic smile that could probably power a small town and does funny things to his heart rhythm.
But as much as Kurt tries to bury this bitter-sweet, longing feeling, it always interrupts him in his daily routine and puts him in a lovesick funk. On the outside he tries to be the kind of composed, calm and emotionally unaffected student that Dalton expects him to be but on the inside he is dying a little every time Blaine accidentally touches him or sings to him at Warbler practice pulling one of his ridiculous, over-dramatic performance faces.
After “The Gap Incident”, as it is called amongst those who witnessed it, and the mutual confession time at the Lima Bean afterwards, Kurt thought things would get weird between them. “I don’t want to screw this up” was obviously just another way to tell him that Blaine doesn’t see him that way and let him down gently. But they are surprisingly, strangely okay with the situation … well at least Blaine seems to be, Kurt thinks with a twisted feeling in his gut.
And now, after their talk, they behave like nothing happened at all and are just back to being friends, best friends nonetheless, but friends only. “And, after all, Blaine’s right”, Kurt stubbornly tries to convince himself.
Of course, he doesn’t want to lose this friendship either, lose the only person that gets him, who needs no excuses or explanations and just accepts him and his diva ways as well as his mental and physical bruises and scars, his hurt soul – and even his crush on him. No regrets, just …. Oh screw this! It’s not that easy to behave calm and think "friendship" when one look in Blaine’s beautiful and compassionate eyes makes Kurt want to kiss the boy so badly it physically hurts.
He sighs deeply and continues to watch the storm outside, lost in his thoughts of Blaine and the thing they have and at the same time don’t have and how he could have possibly made it all up and maneuvered him-self into this dead end again.
Slowly the storm comes to an end. First the rain starts to get less intense, then the wind stops and the thunder is now only a muted grumble in the distance, lightning only flashes on the far horizon, and finally the rain starts to fizzle out in tiny drops, still steadily falling on the already soaked flower beds and ancient trees along Dalton’s driveway.
Kurt turns back to his books, trying to at least squish in an additional hour or two of studying; hoping he’s got this pondering about Blaine and their questionable state of more-than-friendship out of his system long enough to focus and pass his art history test the next day.
But while the last raindrops hit his window, through the far away sound of the dying thunder he suddenly hears clear guitar chords that ring up through the marble staircase near his room. Whoever is playing down there obviously didn't want to put up one of the infamous impromptu performances that are somehow typical among all Dalton students – may it be a Warbler song or a session of the big band – because Dalton was almost deserted on the weekends. Either the students went home to their families or spent their time off-campus with some friends, happy to escape the school atmosphere for some time. Kurt only stayed at Westerville instead of heading home to the new Hummel-Hudson house because he has this beast of a test tomorrow and he doubted he could study in peace in the craziness that a freshly combined patchwork family can be.
So partly out of curiosity, and partly out of avoidance of his study books,Kurt leaves his room and silently walks to the staircase that connects the dorms with the student common rooms downstairs. And at the exact moment he leans over the banister to see who is playing down there, the sun breaks through the clouds and small, silvery-golden beams of sunshine fall like a curtain through the skylight above the stairs and on a boy sitting at the bottom of the stairs – dripping wet, playing his guitar, totally lost in his song. The boy Kurt has spent the last hour and a half longing for like a drowning person longs for land.
And when Blaine begins to sing, Kurt stands there transfixed and keeps watching him while the sunlight plays with the raindrops in Blaine’s mess of curly hair that sticks up in every direction.
Well, I love the rain the most when it stops
We can see the big white houses, yeah, and the docks
And we can jump in the river; don't know if the water or sky is clearer
But I know that I love the rain the most when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
No more grey today, we gonna celebrate
You know Miss Sunshine, she starts to paint a perfect picture of this river parade
And I know that I love the rain the most when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
Kurt closes his eyes and just let himself get lost in the perfect voice and the pure guitar sound reverberating from the marble walls. Damn it, this certainly won’t help in fighting the constant urge to kiss Blaine!
To the sound of the last raindrops hitting the skylight, Kurt imagines it: standing in the pouring summer rain, leaning in Blaine’s embrace – strong and tenderly soft at the same time – his own arms around the boy's neck, hand tangled in his hair and feeling Blaine’s soft lips moving on his own, the cool raindrops running down their hot skin, their hearts beating fast in their chests, bodies pressed closed against each other, never letting go.
Well, the dark waves, they start singing together
I can't believe this change in the weather
I start to hum a child's rhyme
And all these boats, they start rocking in time
And I love the rain the most when it stops
Yes, we love the rain the most when it stops
Yeah when it stops
The summer is coming to an end
We ain't gonna let that slow us down one bit
Til that sunset will start to fade
They're gonna drag us screaming from these old riverbanks
Cherishing his inner image, a warm feeling spreads from Kurt’s stomach throughout his body and he opens his eyes with a small smile on his face only to see that Blaine beams widely up at him, motioning him with a nod of his head to come down, still strumming his guitar. Kurt feels himself blush, like he has been caught red-handed, even though Blaine can’t possibly read his mind.
Slowly he detaches himself from the banister and walks down the stairs to where Blaine is sitting on the last three steps and lowers himself next to the boy. And when Blaine starts singing the last parts of the song, Kurt joins in, harmonizing, because what else would he do, being the perfect Warbler, the perfect friend?
We love the rain the most when it stops
We love the rain the most when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
When it stops, when it stops, when it stops...
Yeah, when it stops
But singing with Blaine feels different this time, sitting on the cold stairs of the lonely Dalton hallway, being in their own special little bubble, the sunbeams falling on them, the guitar blending with their voices. And even though Blaine is soaking wet, Kurt can feel the heat radiating from the body so close to his.
The other boy tilts his head to look at Kurt while he sings the last lines of the song, never moving his eyes from him till the last notes on his guitar have been played.
I think you've had a little too much to drink
Let me help with that
Don't forget to tie the boat up
Not that way, no it's a figure eight, yeah
Yeah when it stops...
The rain, when it stops...
When the song is finished Blaine just keeps sitting there, silently looking at Kurt for some seconds before telling him “You are breathtakingly beautiful.”
Kurt blushes even more than when Blaine caught him listening adoringly to his singing and playing a few minutes ago. He doesn't know to react. This is Blaine, his friend Blaine who clearly wasn’t attracted to him only weeks ago. And now he's sitting here singing this lovely song and then simply stating matter-of-factly that his best friend looks beautiful? Is he still imagining things!? He has probably fallen asleep on his art history books and is dreaming.
“Oh. I don’t know about that”, Kurt finally answers shyly, breaking the gaze with Blaine and looking at his feet.
“Don’t run yourself down, Kurt”, Blaine says softly and takes Kurt’s hand.
Kurt cringes but doesn’t remove his hand from Blaine’s gentle grip. His eyes fly up to his best friend’s face again and teary-eyed he whispers “Don’t do this to me, Blaine. Don’t lead me on, it’s not fair! I don’t know why you are like this, you know that I… You know how I feel.”
However, Kurt’s desperate plea is unexpectedly stopped by Blaine’s lips crushing on his own and after the initial shock fades, he tastes the summer rain on Blaine’s lips and feels his arms pulling him nearer (Where the hell did the guitar go and why is he thinking that right now? Blaine. Is. Kissing. Him!) and holy hell, how can a heart beat so fast without completely shutting down?!
And then Kurt clings onto Blaine’s damp uniform blazer for dear life and kisses him back like he never knew one could actually kiss a person in real life. He has only ever seen it in movies, kisses that are all hungry and needy and love struck.
And after what could have been minutes or hours or even years, Kurt slowly lets go of Blaine, his fingers still intertwined with his. He wants to say so many things, to ask so many things at once, but he can’t face them all just yet. Kurt just needs to hold on to this happy moment as long as he can without having to question it at all and risk ruining it. So all he can say to the boy, who is nervously sitting in front of him with a shy smile on his face, is “Why are you soaked through and through?”
Kurt tucks a strand of wet, dark curls behind Blaine’s ear, “You should get out of these clothes before you get sick, you know?”
Blaine lets out an amused chuckle, “So, the second I kiss you, you want me out of my clothes?! Slow down, Hummel!”
Kurt blushes, “That was not what I …”
“I know! It just looks so cute when you blush, I couldn’t resist the teasing”, Blaine leans in and kisses Kurt again softly.
“I ran in through the rain from the parking lot. I just came back from my parents and drove through the beautiful summer rain when this song came up on the radio and I thought ‘Kurt would love this’.”
He locks eyes with Kurt, an absolutely sincere look on his face.
“I always think of you, Kurt, there is no part of the day when I don’t think of you and your amazing voice and your inner strength and your lovely quirkiness. I have since the very first moment I got to know you a month ago. I labeled it as admiration for a friend, an awesome person and talented singer I had the luck to spend time with. Maybe I unconsciously realized there might be more, but I was afraid. I know Dalton has this strict no-tolerance policy but I didn’t want to put it to the test, not after what you’ve been through at McKinley, not after what I experienced. I hypocritically told you to have courage when the person who really needed it was me. I tried to get over my confused emotions with Jeremiah but you know how that turned oui. In the long run, I was glad it did, because it made me realize what was in front of me all the time. And I didn’t want to run anymore. I finally want be who I am… with you. On my drive here I decided to give it a try and when I saw you standing there at the banister, all illuminated by the sun breaking through the skylight – my heart stopped. I mean what I said, you are beautiful, inside and out and …and I think I have fallen for you. For a while now.”
Blaine’s little speech leaves Kurt with goose bumps all over this body. He doesn’t know what to say, his heart is beating out of his chest and Blaine’s amber eyes are looking at him hopefully.
“Say something. Please!?”
So Kurt lifts his hand and affectionately cups Blaine’s cheek, carefully brushing aside a raindrop that has fallen from the boy’s long eyelashes to his face with his thumb, and gently whispers “You already know it has always been you.”
And when he was pulled in a tight hug Kurt thought, “I really love the rain when it stops.”
Kurt, who was interrupted in his art history study-session by this unexpected thunderstorm, is leaning at the window of his room at Dalton Academy and watches the raindrops hitting the delicate lead-bordered window tiles. He couldn’t focus on his books anyways, his mind kept wandering back to the hobbit-sized boy with the curly, dark hair, the velvet voice, beautiful amber eyes, and that energetic smile that could probably power a small town and does funny things to his heart rhythm.
But as much as Kurt tries to bury this bitter-sweet, longing feeling, it always interrupts him in his daily routine and puts him in a lovesick funk. On the outside he tries to be the kind of composed, calm and emotionally unaffected student that Dalton expects him to be but on the inside he is dying a little every time Blaine accidentally touches him or sings to him at Warbler practice pulling one of his ridiculous, over-dramatic performance faces.
After “The Gap Incident”, as it is called amongst those who witnessed it, and the mutual confession time at the Lima Bean afterwards, Kurt thought things would get weird between them. “I don’t want to screw this up” was obviously just another way to tell him that Blaine doesn’t see him that way and let him down gently. But they are surprisingly, strangely okay with the situation … well at least Blaine seems to be, Kurt thinks with a twisted feeling in his gut.
And now, after their talk, they behave like nothing happened at all and are just back to being friends, best friends nonetheless, but friends only. “And, after all, Blaine’s right”, Kurt stubbornly tries to convince himself.
Of course, he doesn’t want to lose this friendship either, lose the only person that gets him, who needs no excuses or explanations and just accepts him and his diva ways as well as his mental and physical bruises and scars, his hurt soul – and even his crush on him. No regrets, just …. Oh screw this! It’s not that easy to behave calm and think "friendship" when one look in Blaine’s beautiful and compassionate eyes makes Kurt want to kiss the boy so badly it physically hurts.
He sighs deeply and continues to watch the storm outside, lost in his thoughts of Blaine and the thing they have and at the same time don’t have and how he could have possibly made it all up and maneuvered him-self into this dead end again.
Slowly the storm comes to an end. First the rain starts to get less intense, then the wind stops and the thunder is now only a muted grumble in the distance, lightning only flashes on the far horizon, and finally the rain starts to fizzle out in tiny drops, still steadily falling on the already soaked flower beds and ancient trees along Dalton’s driveway.
Kurt turns back to his books, trying to at least squish in an additional hour or two of studying; hoping he’s got this pondering about Blaine and their questionable state of more-than-friendship out of his system long enough to focus and pass his art history test the next day.
But while the last raindrops hit his window, through the far away sound of the dying thunder he suddenly hears clear guitar chords that ring up through the marble staircase near his room. Whoever is playing down there obviously didn't want to put up one of the infamous impromptu performances that are somehow typical among all Dalton students – may it be a Warbler song or a session of the big band – because Dalton was almost deserted on the weekends. Either the students went home to their families or spent their time off-campus with some friends, happy to escape the school atmosphere for some time. Kurt only stayed at Westerville instead of heading home to the new Hummel-Hudson house because he has this beast of a test tomorrow and he doubted he could study in peace in the craziness that a freshly combined patchwork family can be.
So partly out of curiosity, and partly out of avoidance of his study books,Kurt leaves his room and silently walks to the staircase that connects the dorms with the student common rooms downstairs. And at the exact moment he leans over the banister to see who is playing down there, the sun breaks through the clouds and small, silvery-golden beams of sunshine fall like a curtain through the skylight above the stairs and on a boy sitting at the bottom of the stairs – dripping wet, playing his guitar, totally lost in his song. The boy Kurt has spent the last hour and a half longing for like a drowning person longs for land.
And when Blaine begins to sing, Kurt stands there transfixed and keeps watching him while the sunlight plays with the raindrops in Blaine’s mess of curly hair that sticks up in every direction.
We can see the big white houses, yeah, and the docks
And we can jump in the river; don't know if the water or sky is clearer
But I know that I love the rain the most when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
No more grey today, we gonna celebrate
You know Miss Sunshine, she starts to paint a perfect picture of this river parade
And I know that I love the rain the most when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
Kurt closes his eyes and just let himself get lost in the perfect voice and the pure guitar sound reverberating from the marble walls. Damn it, this certainly won’t help in fighting the constant urge to kiss Blaine!
To the sound of the last raindrops hitting the skylight, Kurt imagines it: standing in the pouring summer rain, leaning in Blaine’s embrace – strong and tenderly soft at the same time – his own arms around the boy's neck, hand tangled in his hair and feeling Blaine’s soft lips moving on his own, the cool raindrops running down their hot skin, their hearts beating fast in their chests, bodies pressed closed against each other, never letting go.
Well, the dark waves, they start singing together
I can't believe this change in the weather
I start to hum a child's rhyme
And all these boats, they start rocking in time
And I love the rain the most when it stops
Yes, we love the rain the most when it stops
Yeah when it stops
The summer is coming to an end
We ain't gonna let that slow us down one bit
Til that sunset will start to fade
They're gonna drag us screaming from these old riverbanks
Cherishing his inner image, a warm feeling spreads from Kurt’s stomach throughout his body and he opens his eyes with a small smile on his face only to see that Blaine beams widely up at him, motioning him with a nod of his head to come down, still strumming his guitar. Kurt feels himself blush, like he has been caught red-handed, even though Blaine can’t possibly read his mind.
Slowly he detaches himself from the banister and walks down the stairs to where Blaine is sitting on the last three steps and lowers himself next to the boy. And when Blaine starts singing the last parts of the song, Kurt joins in, harmonizing, because what else would he do, being the perfect Warbler, the perfect friend?
We love the rain the most when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
Yeah, when it stops
When it stops, when it stops, when it stops...
Yeah, when it stops
But singing with Blaine feels different this time, sitting on the cold stairs of the lonely Dalton hallway, being in their own special little bubble, the sunbeams falling on them, the guitar blending with their voices. And even though Blaine is soaking wet, Kurt can feel the heat radiating from the body so close to his.
The other boy tilts his head to look at Kurt while he sings the last lines of the song, never moving his eyes from him till the last notes on his guitar have been played.
I think you've had a little too much to drink
Let me help with that
Don't forget to tie the boat up
Not that way, no it's a figure eight, yeah
Yeah when it stops...
The rain, when it stops...
When the song is finished Blaine just keeps sitting there, silently looking at Kurt for some seconds before telling him “You are breathtakingly beautiful.”
Kurt blushes even more than when Blaine caught him listening adoringly to his singing and playing a few minutes ago. He doesn't know to react. This is Blaine, his friend Blaine who clearly wasn’t attracted to him only weeks ago. And now he's sitting here singing this lovely song and then simply stating matter-of-factly that his best friend looks beautiful? Is he still imagining things!? He has probably fallen asleep on his art history books and is dreaming.
“Oh. I don’t know about that”, Kurt finally answers shyly, breaking the gaze with Blaine and looking at his feet.
“Don’t run yourself down, Kurt”, Blaine says softly and takes Kurt’s hand.
Kurt cringes but doesn’t remove his hand from Blaine’s gentle grip. His eyes fly up to his best friend’s face again and teary-eyed he whispers “Don’t do this to me, Blaine. Don’t lead me on, it’s not fair! I don’t know why you are like this, you know that I… You know how I feel.”
However, Kurt’s desperate plea is unexpectedly stopped by Blaine’s lips crushing on his own and after the initial shock fades, he tastes the summer rain on Blaine’s lips and feels his arms pulling him nearer (Where the hell did the guitar go and why is he thinking that right now? Blaine. Is. Kissing. Him!) and holy hell, how can a heart beat so fast without completely shutting down?!
And then Kurt clings onto Blaine’s damp uniform blazer for dear life and kisses him back like he never knew one could actually kiss a person in real life. He has only ever seen it in movies, kisses that are all hungry and needy and love struck.
And after what could have been minutes or hours or even years, Kurt slowly lets go of Blaine, his fingers still intertwined with his. He wants to say so many things, to ask so many things at once, but he can’t face them all just yet. Kurt just needs to hold on to this happy moment as long as he can without having to question it at all and risk ruining it. So all he can say to the boy, who is nervously sitting in front of him with a shy smile on his face, is “Why are you soaked through and through?”
Kurt tucks a strand of wet, dark curls behind Blaine’s ear, “You should get out of these clothes before you get sick, you know?”
Blaine lets out an amused chuckle, “So, the second I kiss you, you want me out of my clothes?! Slow down, Hummel!”
Kurt blushes, “That was not what I …”
“I know! It just looks so cute when you blush, I couldn’t resist the teasing”, Blaine leans in and kisses Kurt again softly.
“I ran in through the rain from the parking lot. I just came back from my parents and drove through the beautiful summer rain when this song came up on the radio and I thought ‘Kurt would love this’.”
He locks eyes with Kurt, an absolutely sincere look on his face.
“I always think of you, Kurt, there is no part of the day when I don’t think of you and your amazing voice and your inner strength and your lovely quirkiness. I have since the very first moment I got to know you a month ago. I labeled it as admiration for a friend, an awesome person and talented singer I had the luck to spend time with. Maybe I unconsciously realized there might be more, but I was afraid. I know Dalton has this strict no-tolerance policy but I didn’t want to put it to the test, not after what you’ve been through at McKinley, not after what I experienced. I hypocritically told you to have courage when the person who really needed it was me. I tried to get over my confused emotions with Jeremiah but you know how that turned oui. In the long run, I was glad it did, because it made me realize what was in front of me all the time. And I didn’t want to run anymore. I finally want be who I am… with you. On my drive here I decided to give it a try and when I saw you standing there at the banister, all illuminated by the sun breaking through the skylight – my heart stopped. I mean what I said, you are beautiful, inside and out and …and I think I have fallen for you. For a while now.”
Blaine’s little speech leaves Kurt with goose bumps all over this body. He doesn’t know what to say, his heart is beating out of his chest and Blaine’s amber eyes are looking at him hopefully.
“Say something. Please!?”
So Kurt lifts his hand and affectionately cups Blaine’s cheek, carefully brushing aside a raindrop that has fallen from the boy’s long eyelashes to his face with his thumb, and gently whispers “You already know it has always been you.”
And when he was pulled in a tight hug Kurt thought, “I really love the rain when it stops.”