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Toys and Secrets.

Burt and Finn both find a sex toy in Kurt's room. Finn, clueless, doesn't know what it is and dismisses it, Burt however - does not.


E - Words: 1,139 - Last Updated: Nov 04, 2012
1,162 0 1 4
Categories: Cotton Candy Fluff, Humor,
Characters: Blaine Anderson, Burt Hummel, Carole Hudson-Hummel, Finn Hudson, Kurt Hummel,
Tags: established relationship,

“Mom!” Finn whined, walking down the stairs and over towards where Carole was curled up in front of the television - a steaming mug of coffee held between her hands. “Have you seen my blue jacket, I can’t find it anywhere.”

Carole waited a few moments before glancing over her shoulder, taking a sip from her cup. “I put a load of clothes in Kurt’s closet earlier… It might have been in there.”

Finn nodded his head and turned back, retreating up the stairs. He walked into Kurt’s room and over towards his closet. 

He tried to be as careful as possible as he rifled through the clothes, grinning as he tugged his jacket out - knocking a few of Kurt’s clothes to the floor in the process. 

“Oh crap,” Finn muttered to himself, tossing the jacket onto the bed as he bent down to pick the clothes up, folding them neatly. He noticed a small black bag that had become dislodged during the incident and picked it up - fully intent on putting it back into its original place. 

He turned the small bag over in his hands for a few seconds, before his curiosity finally got the better of him. He grabbed the strings and untied the bag, pulling out a long, dark colored object. He ran his fingers over it - the plastic feeling warm against his hand.

He reached down, flicking on one of the buttons and gasping as the object began to vibrate in his hands. 

“What’s that?” Burt asked, startling Finn and causing him to drop the device.

“I-its not mine,” Finn protested, picking it up from the floor and flicking the switch off.

“Let me see it,” Burt said, holding his hand out.

Finn nodded and took a few tentative steps forwards, placing the device in Burt’s hand. “What is it?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at it.

Burt turned it over in his hands a few times, his cheeks tinting a little as he realized what it was. “It’s something I’ll have to talk to Kurt about,” he muttered. “Go on, go. Rachel’s waiting for you.”

Finn nodded, picking up his jacket and tugging it on before making his way down the stairs and outside.

Burt sighed, shaking his head as he walked out of Kurt’s room - vibrator in his hand.


Kurt giggled as he walked through the door, holding his phone to his ear. “Yes Blaine,” he mumbled, kicking the door shut behind him and throwing his keys onto the table. He walked up towards his room and bit down on his bottom lip, throwing his satchel to the floor. “Blaine!” he hissed, giggling.

Burt sighed and made his way up the stairs, arms folded over his chest. 

“Mm, I miss you too,” Kurt hummed, sitting back against his bed and picking an imaginary piece of lint off of his shirt. “But you’re coming around tomorrow,” he started, dropping his voice so it was a little lower than usual. “And I have that new thing we can use.”

Burt cleared his throat as he leaned against the door frame to Kurt’s room, glaring at his son.

“Blaine hold on a sec,” Kurt muttered, moving the phone away from his ear. “Yeah, Dad?”

“I need to talk to you,” Burt said, eyeing the phone in Kurt’s hand.

“Can it wait? I’m kind of in the middle of something,” Kurt replied.

Burt shook his head. “No, not really.”

Kurt sighed and held the phone back up towards his ear. “Blaine, I’ll call you back later,” he started, grinning. “I know, I know. But I’ll make it up to you, alright?” he paused. “I love you too.” Kurt hung up. “So… what did you want to talk to me about?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. 

Burt walked into Kurt’s room, shutting the door behind him and moving over to sit down on the edge of the bed. He pulled the vibrator out of the pocket of his jumper and held it up. “I want you to explain to me why you have this in my room.”

Kurt’s eyes widened and he sat up a little straighter. “What were you doing rummaging through my stuff?” He snapped.

“Don’t take that tone with me, Kurt. I’m your father and whilst you live under this roof I’ll do whatever the hell I want,” Burt growled. “And besides, I wasn’t the one who found it.”

“Then wh-,” Kurt stopped, clenching his hands into fists. “Finn.”

“Stop trying to change the subject, Kurt.” Burt mumbled, holding the sleek toy up and glaring at his son. “I. Want. You. To. Explain.” He said, punctuating each word.

Kurt blushed and shrugged his shoulders. “It’s not even mine,” he lied, shrugging his shoulders. “It’s Rachel’s.”

Burt just rolled his eyes. “Don’t lie to me, Kurt.”

“I’m not lying to you! She must have left it here the other day or something.”

Burt sighed. “Listen, Kurt. I know you and Blaine are… Active. It’s no secret that you’ve been at it like rabbits for the past two months.”

“We have not!” Kurt protested, shaking his head.

Burt looked at Kurt like he had just asked him what colour the sky was. “Kurt. Your trash has been full of condom wrappers. You haven’t stopped visiting Blaine, you’re constantly on the phone to him and I saw you sneaking in late three times in the past week.”

Kurt sighed and slumped his shoulders. “Fine… What are you going to do? Ground me? Stop me from seeing Blaine?” 

Burt shook his head. “I’m not that evil, Kurt. I know how much you two love each other,” he stared. “Listen, this is what’s going to happen. We’re going to forget this ever happened - although I can’t say the same for your brother… But he didn’t really seem to know what it was… Anyway,” he shrugged. “This never happened. But if you’re late one more time this week, you’ll be grounded for the next two weeks.”

Kurt eagerly nodded his head; grateful for the lack of punishment he had been given. 

Burt smiled a little and stood up, starting to leave.

“Err, Dad…” Kurt started, biting down on his bottom lip. “Can I uh, have my… Thing back please.”

Burt sighed and threw the toy back down onto the bed. “Just… Be safe,” he nodded, before leaving and closing the door.

“Oh my god,” Kurt groaned to himself, burying his head in his pillow and screaming into it.


“Hey Blaine?” Kurt mumbled, holding his phone to his ear as he rang his boyfriend back. “You’ll never guess what just happened.”


Kurt spent the next half an hour explaining what had happened - narrowing his eyes at the sudden eruption of laughter from Blaine’s end of the phone.

“It’s not funny!” Kurt huffed.

“Oh but, Kurt. It really is!” Blaine choked out between laughter.

Kurt rolled his eyes and waited for Blaine’s laughter to die down, before smirking. “So… Where were we then?” he grinned, adjusting himself to be comfortable on his bed as Blaine whispered various different sexual things in his ear.

End Notes: Thanks for reading guys!

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Oh continue please!!!!! This is great!!!and I can relate....my mother went snooping.....and found me and my girlfriends toys. Parents are s dam nosey