Nov. 6, 2012, 7:54 a.m.
Broken
The List
Blaine's in therapy and his therapist asks him to make a list of all the people who care about him.
K - Words: 3,625 - Last Updated: Nov 06, 2012 1,896 0 1 4 Categories: Romance, Characters: Blaine Anderson, Burt Hummel, Carole Hudson-Hummel, Cooper Anderson, David Karofsky, Finn Hudson, Kurt Hummel, Rachel Berry, Sam Evans, Tags: hurt/comfort,
Blaine really didn’t want to go to therapy but he promise Kurt he would and it hadn’t been all that bad so far, he was worried about getting stuck with a homophobic therapist but she was really supportive. She had asked him to go home and make a list of people who cared about him, he balked at the idea knowing the list would only contain one name Kurt but he agreed to do it anyway. He sat on the floor in front of his bed his laptop on the floor in front of him with Skype open as he waited for Kurt to call him he wrote on the piece of paper.
1. Kurt
He looked up when he heard Skype letting him know Kurt was calling.
“Hey baby!” He greeted Kurt
“Hi honey! How are you?”
“I’m really good, I’ve be going to therapy like you asked.”
“Oh good! How’s that going?”
“It’s been ok so far, she’s given me some homework I have to make a list of people who care about me.” Blaine said rolling his eyes.
“You’d have better put me on that list.”
“You’re #1 baby.” Blaine said proudly showing Kurt the paper.
“Is that Blaine?” he heard Rachel’s voice call before she flopped down on the bed next to Kurt, “Hi Blaine!”
“Hi Rachel, how are you?”
“I’m fantastic! How are you?”
“Good, how’s New York?”
“It’s amazing! I know you only saw it a little when you were here but God Blaine you are going to love it when you move here next year! I’m so excited for when you move in with us!” Rachel gushed.
“You are?” Blaine asked a little surprised.
“Of course! You’re my second favourite gay who I’m not related to! And that’s saying a lot because I’ve made a lot of gay friends at NAYDA!”
“Rachel, I love you but go away. I want to talk to my boyfriend alone.”
“Fine! We’ll just have to have our own Skype date sometime soon Blaine, ok?
“Ok Rachel.” He smiled.
#2 Rachel
“What are you writing?” Kurt asked.
“Oh, I was just adding Rachel to my list.”
Kurt didn’t say anything he just smiled happy that his boyfriend was finally begin to realise that people really did care about him.
“How’s glee club?”
“Good, I mean it isn’t the same without you or the others but it’s still good. Oh! Did I tell you that Jake, the guy that knocked over the music stand during his audition, is Puck’s half-brother?”
“Does Puck know?”
“Yeah, Mr. Schue called and told him.”
“Wow.”
Blaine was about to say something else when he phone beeped singling a new text.
You’d better be on your way for Friday Night dinner, you miss one more and you are grounded Blaine. –Burt
Blaine wrinkled his forehead in confusion.
“Who is it from?” Kurt asked.
“Your dad, he says if I miss Friday Night dinner I’m grounded. Can he do that? I mean I don’t live with him or anything.”
“Do you really want to test my dad?”
Blaine got another text.
I’m making your favorite so you’d better be hungry- Carole.
“Let me guess, that one was from Carole?”
Blaine nodded.
“You’d better go; I’ll call you tomorrow ok?”
“Sounds good. I love you.”
“I love you too Blaine, and baby you might want to add my parents to that list of yours.”
“Already on it.”
#3 Burt and Carole
Blaine sent Burt a quick text to let him know he was on his way after saying goodbye to Kurt and began the short drive to the Hummel-Hudson house.
When he arrived he chuckled to himself at the sight of Finn watching out the window like a puppy waiting for his owner to come home. As soon as Blaine got out of his car Finn pulled the front door open.
“Mom! Burt! He’s here! Can we eat now?” Finn yelled.
“And here I thought you were excited to see me for a second Finn.” Blaine joked.
“Sorry dude, I haven’t had anything to eat in an hour, I’m starving!”
“Oh wow, a whole hour how are you still standing?” Sam joked coming up behind Finn.
“How you doing Blaine?” Sam asked turning to Blaine.
“Good.”
“Good, you look good.”
“Uh…thanks.”
“Dude are you hitting on my brother’s boyfriend? Cause that’s not cool.”
“What? No. I just mean for a while there I was really worried but lately he’s been looking like Blaine again.”
“Oh. Yeah, ok that’s cool then.”
“You were worried about me?”
“Yeah, man. You’re my friend and for a while there I was really scared you were going to hurt yourself.”
“Sorry.”
“No worries, I’m just glad you are doing better now.”
#4 Sam
“We all are.” Carole said coming into the hallway where the boys were standing. She gave Blaine a hug and a kiss on the cheek, “It’s been too long Blaine.”
“Hi Carole.”
“I hope you’re hungry.”
“Starved.”
“Good. Burt, honey, dinner’s ready!”
“Is Blaine here yet?” Burt yelled back
“Yeah I’m here.” Blaine answered
“Good, you three head on in. Blaine and I will be right there.” Burt said as he appeared from around the corner.
Blaine gulped, he adored Burt but sometimes the man scared him, he wasn’t sure what he wanted to talk to him about but what if Burt still thought Blaine had cheated on Kurt, Blaine began to worry that this was all a set up and Burt would bring out his shotgun any second.
“Calm down Blaine, you aren’t in serious trouble.”
“But I am in trouble?”
“Well, yes. In this family we don’t skip Friday Night dinners for months on end. It’s only acceptable to miss the occasional Friday Night dinner if you have a good reason, so do you have a good reason Blaine?”
“Kurt and I had broken up and I didn’t think I’d be welcome.”
“I don’t recall dis-inviting you and I know Carole didn’t either. So why would you think you wouldn’t be welcome?”
Blaine shrugged.
“We care about you kid, no matter what happens between you and Kurt we expect to see you here every Friday night, ok?”
“Ok.”
“Good, now let’s go see if Finn has left us any food.”
Burt and Blaine joined the others in the kitchen and saw that Carole hadn’t let the others even think about touching the lasagna she had made until everyone was seated. The dinner was delicious, as it always is at the Hummel-Hudson house, and no one was surprised when Finn reached for the last piece but they were surprised when he placed it on Blaine’s plate instead of his own.
“What? It’s his favorite and there’s no way he’d take the last piece on his own. It’s bad manner s or something. Plus, no offence dude, but you are way too skinny you need to eat more.”
#5 Finn
When Blaine got home that night he was kicking himself for missing all those Friday night dinners and he promised himself (and Burt and Carole) he wouldn’t be missing anymore.
Hey baby, how was dinner with my family? –Kurt
Good, Finn gave me the last piece of lasagna. –Blaine
WHAT? I didn’t know Finn knew how to share food….Rachel’s jealous, lol. –Kurt
You better have added him to your list-Kurt
I did, Sam too.-Blaine
Good! I need to get some sleep I had to get up super early for work today.-Kurt
Ok, goodnight baby. I wish I was there to cuddle with you.-Blaine
I wish you were here too, goodnight honey. I love you, so much.-Kurt
I love you too-Blaine
Before Blaine went to bed he looked at his list, the list that he expected to only have one name on it but now had six and it had only been one day, he wondered if he would be adding more names tomorrow.
He awoke the next morning to the feeling of someone jumping on him, it was not a pleasant feeling.
“Rise and shine Blainers!”
“Oh god, go away Cooper.” Blaine mumbled as he tried to tunnel under his blankets and away from his brother.
“Oh no you don’t. Hey, are you wearing pjs?’
“Yeah why?”
Cooper grabbed Blaine’s blankets and ripped them off the bed.
“Cause if you weren’t I wouldn’t have done that. I didn’t want to accidentally see my little brother’s junk.” Cooper shuddered.
“Why are you here?”
“I missed you Squirt.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“So what’s on the agenda today Squirt?” Cooper asked flopping down next to Blaine.
“I just asked you call me that!”
“I know; I ignored you. Seriously, what are we doing today?”
“I have an appointment.”
“What kind of appointment? A manicure cause I could use one too.”
“No not a manicure.”
“A massage? “
“No”
“Haircut? I don’t think they could get through all that gel.”
“Not a haircut, it’s a doctor’s appointment, sort of.”
“Oh! Are you going to see if they can figure out why you didn’t grow?”
“I’m not that short Cooper!”
“Seriously though, is everything ok? You’re not sick are you? Oh my god! Are you dying? Is it contentious? Why didn’t you tell me before I lied on your bed? I probably have it now! Oh god I’m dying aren’t I?”
“Cooper! I’m not sick!”
“So we’re not dying?”
“We’re not dying.”
“Good, we’re much too handsome to die, the world would be devastated.”
“You are a drama queen you know that right?”
“So why are we going to the doctor if we’re not dying?’
“I’m going to see my therapist, if you must know.”
“You’re seeing a therapist?”
Blaine nodded.
“What do you talk about? Do you talk about me?”
“We mostly talk about Sadie Hawkins.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
“You’re serious.”
“Yeah.”
“Good.”
“Yeah.”
“Can I come?”
“What?”
“I want to come; I think it would be good for me.”
“What in case you have to audition to play a therapist?”
“You’re not the only one who has issues related to Sadie Hawkins Blaine.”
“Yeah you can come. Can you hand me that piece of paper & pen for a second?”
#6 Cooper
“Why did you write my name on that paper?”
“It’s a list of people who care about me, it’s my therapy homework.”
“And you didn’t think to put my name on until just now? That hurts.”
“Sorry, it’s nothing to do with you it’s my own issue. I have a hard time believing people care about me I think it’s why she’s making me make a list.”
“Is it because mom and dad are never around?”
“Partly.”
“They do care about you, in their way Blaine. They just don’t know how to show it.”
Blaine scoffed.
“They do, trust me you didn’t see them when…”
“When?”
“When you were in the hospital, when we thought you might never wake up.”
“They were there?”
“Every day, right by my side.”
“You were there?”
“I never left. You don’t remember much about that time do you?”
Blaine shook his head.
“Lucky you I remember everything.”
“Yeah well I remember everything about the beating, what to trade? I’d much rather remember the hospital.”
Cooper flinched, nobody in their family ever referred to it as anything other than Sadie Hawkins or the incident, they certainly never called it the beating. And the fact that Blaine remembered everything made Cooper want to be sick.
“I didn’t know. I thought you had forgotten the details, I had hoped you had forgotten the details.”
“No such luck.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not right now, soon maybe.”
“Ok.”
“They were really there every day?”
“Yeah, every day all day.”
Cooper picked up the pen Blaine had set down on the bed and handed it to him.
“You should put them on your list Squirt.”
#7 Mom and Dad
“Ok get up and shower maybe we can grab some coffee before your appointment.”
An hour later Blaine and Cooper were at the Lima Bean, Blaine grabbed a table while Cooper lined up to get their coffees.
“Blaine?”
“Karofsky, uh…hi.”
“Hi, I understand if you don’t want to talk to me we’ve never been friends but I wanted to check on you.”
“Check on me?”
“Yeah I heard you were depressed and I wanted to make sure you were ok and weren’t planning on doing anything stupid like….like what I tried to do.”
“No, I’m good. I mean I was depressed before but I’m good now.”
“Good. Hey, I’m sorry for the way I treated you and Kurt before.”
“Don’t worry about it; I’ve been through a lot worse than being pushed into a fence.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“That sucks, how did you deal with it?”
“I didn’t at the time, not really. But now I’m in therapy.”
“Is your therapist any good?”
“Yeah, do you want her number?”
“Yeah, I was in therapy but it was one my mom found and he kept trying to make me straight.”
“That’s horrible, don’t worry this one won’t do that. She’s really supportive.”
“Good.”
“Hey Blainers, who’s your friend?”
“Dave Karofsky this is my brother Cooper, Cooper this is Dave.”
“Hey you’re the guy from those credit commercials! I love those commercials!”
“Oh god! Please don’t get him started.”
“A fan hey, it’s always nice to meet a fan.”
Blaine banged his head on the table.
“Oh, is that the time? I have to go I have a date with Sebastian.”
“You and Sebastian?” Blaine asked lifting his head off the table.
“Yeah.” Dave replied with a shy smile.
“That’s awesome! I’m really happy for you both.”
“Thanks, say hi to Kurt for me.”
“I will, you should give him a call sometime he’d love to hear from you.”
“Yeah ok.”
Guess who’s a couple now?-Blaine
Who?-Kurt
Karofsky and Sebastian!!-Blaine
Really? How did you find that out?-Kurt
Karofsky told me when Cooper & I ran into him at the Lima Bean. –Blaine.
Huh, good for them. Say hi to Cooper for me.-Kurt
Cooper says hi back.-Blaine
I love you Blaine-Kurt
I love you too-Blaine
“Aw, isn’t that sweet.” Cooper said reading over Blaine’s shoulder.
“Yeah, ever since we broke up a few months ago he makes sure to tell me at least once a day that he loves me.”
“You guys broke up?”
“Yeah, I was being stupid but we’re back together.”
“That’s good. How come I never heard you mention that Dave kid?”
“We’re not really friends.”
“So what were you talking about?”
“Oh, he just wanted to make sure I was ok.”
Blaine bit his lip. “I should put on my list shouldn’t I?”
“People don’t check on people who they don’t care about Squirt.”
#7 Dave Karofsky (surprisingly)
Blaine’s therapy session went rather well with Cooper only monopolizing 40 minutes of the 50 minute session, but Blaine figured his brother needed it so it didn’t bother him too much. They talked about how the Sadie Hawkins incident affected Cooper, which was good for Blaine to hear, he wasn’t happy that his brother was so upset by it but he was glad to hear how much his brother cared about him and the revelation that Cooper still had nightmares about it proved to Blaine how much Cooper loved him. His therapist was happy with the progress he was making on his list but she refused to take it from him, telling him it wasn’t complete yet. He didn’t know what to say to that as he was sure that he hadn’t forgotten anyone, he’d talk to Kurt about it later and he was sure Kurt would agree with him.
He looked over the list one more time as he waited for Kurt to log onto Skype, yeah there was no way he was forgetting anyone. No one else cared about him, he was sure of it.
“Hey baby!” Kurt said smiling as soon as Blaine accepted his call.
“Hey.”
“What’s wrong? Did therapy not go well today?”
“No, it was fine but she told me my list wasn’t complete and I’m sure it is.”
“Let me see it.”
Blaine held the paper up so Kurt could read it via his webcam.
“Yeah, that’s not nearly complete babe.”
“It’s not?”
“Not even close.”
“Who am I forgetting?”
“Gee, I don’t know maybe your best friend.”
Blaine looked confused.
“Asian, likes to dance.”
“Holy shit! I forgot Mike!”
“Yeah you did.”
#8 Mike
“Ok there. Done.”
Kurt shook his head.
“Really? Who else?”
“Think about it, really think. And maybe look around your room a bit.”
“Look around my room? Why?” Blaine asked looking around, then he spotted a shot glass that read Drink til she’s cute.
He smiled.
#9 Puck
“Hi Blaine!”
“Hey Rach.”
“Are you doing homework on your skype date?”
“Um…sorta, I’m making a list of people who care about me, it’s part of my therapy.”
“I’d better be on that list.”
“Don’t worry you are.” He showed her the list.
“Normally I wouldn’t be happy being #2 on anything but in this case since I’m right after Kurt I’ll consider it to be quite the honour.”
“You should, you’re above me even.” Cooper said shoving Blaine over so he could sit on the chair with him.
“Were you listening?’
“Yup, I needed to know if it was safe to come in or not. Hi Kurtsie!”
“Hello Cooper.” Kurt replied his voice dripping with disdain at being called Kurtsie.
“Ok, seriously who else do I need to add to my list?” Blaine asked trying to get back on topic.
“Considering how pissed they were when you got slushied I’d ass Artie and Santana.” Rachel suggested.
“They were pissed when I got slushied?”
“Oh yeah, they were almost as upset as Kurt was. Artie flipped out at Mr. Schue for not taking action and Santana confronted Sebastian, she even strapped a mini tape recorder to her underboob, her underboob Blaine.”
“Ok, please stop saying underboob.”
#10 Artie
#11 Santana
“There I’ve added them.”
“I’m bored.” Cooper whined
“Well then go find something to do.”
“Oh! We should sing!” Cooper suggested which made Rachel bounce in her seat. Then as if there was a cue only the tow of them could hear they began to sing, two different songs that didn’t mesh together at all. Neither one of them wanted to be outdone so they both sang louder and louder. Kurt and Blaine looked at each other both knowing there wasn’t a way to stop this. Kurt picked up his phone and shrugged, Blaine nodded, grabbed his phone and walked downstairs.
“They are insane!” Blaine exclaimed when Kurt picked up the phone.
“Tell me about it, I had to go outside to get away from that!”
“Ok, so if you don’t mind talking about it I would like to talk about my list some more.”
“Of course I don’t mind baby.”
“Good, because I don’t know who else to add.”
“Ok well you are missing a bunch of the New Directions and all the Warblers.”
“So it I add them it will be done?”
“Honey, I don’t think it’ll ever be done, I don’t think the amount of people you have on the list is the point.”
“So what is the point?”
“I think you need to figure that out for yourself or your therapist would’ve told you.”
“That makes sense I guess. I just wish I knew what the point was.”
“Just think about it for a baby, you’ll figure it out.”
“Ok, so I have to make a list of people who care about me but the point of it isn’t how many people are on the list…”
“Yes.”
Blaine thinks for a minutes, biting his lip as he does, if he and Kurt were still on Skype the gesture would’ve given Kurt some very dirty thoughts.
“Oh! It’s to show me that people do care about me.”
“Right, and…?”
“And….I’m not worthless?”
“Say it with some conviction Blaine.”
“I’m not worthless.”
“That’s right baby! You don’t know how happy that makes me to hear you say that! I wish I was there so I could kiss you.”
“Me too baby.”
“I love you so much Blaine.”
“I love you too Kurt, more than anything.”
Comments
This was awesome. I love seeing Burt and Blaine interact and I can't get enough of Blaine and Cooper. Cooper is hilarious, I found myself cracking up laughing when he was worried that they were dying. I like that the point of the list was to show Blaine that people did care and that he meant something. I really think this is something that the character is going to have to realize on Glee as well. I can't wait to see what you decide to write next.