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March 5, 2012, 12:05 p.m.


The Truth About Kurt

It's hard to come to terms with, but Kurt can't deny it anymore. He hates cuddling.


K - Words: 3,202 - Last Updated: Mar 05, 2012
947 0 0 1
Categories: Angst,
Characters: Blaine Anderson, Kurt Hummel, Rachel Berry,
Tags: established relationship, futurefic,

Author's Notes: Thanks as always to rainbowmcgee09 and brihana25 for the betaing. So, there's this trope in Glee fiction to turn Blaine into a cuddle monster. Kurt is usually slightly exasperated at first, but then he gives in and it's all very "awww" inducing. The other day, I had this random thought out of nowhere of, What if Kurt hated cuddling? This is the result.
Kurt stared up at the ceiling in the dark, counting the minutes as he listed to Blaine breathe beside him. Once he reached three minutes and was positive Blaine was asleep, he carefully unwound Blaine's arms from his waist and slid over to the edge of his too small full-size bed. He rolled onto his side, closed his eyes and fell asleep.

He woke a few hours later to the feel of hot, wet breath on the back of his neck. Of course, Blaine would reach out and cuddle him even in his sleep. Blaine loved cuddling. This really wasn't something he'd ever imagined being an issue, but the truth was simple – Kurt hated cuddling. At least when he was sleeping. Cuddling on the couch while watching a movie or TV was one thing. But when Kurt slept, he liked his space to stretch out and do what he wanted.

At first, he thought it was just an adjustment he would have to make. He'd never shared his bed with anyone and maybe given enough time, Kurt would enjoy the feeling of Blaine pressed up against him in his sleep. But they'd been sharing a bed at least once a week for most of the last year and nothing had changed. Kurt should have been excited about Blaine coming to visit him in New York for New Year's. It was only the second time Blaine had been able to make it out since Kurt moved, but all he could think about was how much sleep he wasn't going to get and how tired he was going to be in just a couple days.

After laying still for almost an hour and trying very hard to ignore the feeling of Blaine's breath on his neck and the heat pouring off of his boyfriend that was making him sweaty and uncomfortable, Kurt finally resigned himself to not getting any more sleep in his own bed that night. He once more extricated himself from Blaine's grasp and crept out to the living room, avoiding the various squeaking floorboards. He turned the TV to some random late-night infomercial, pulled the blanket over himself and fell asleep.

The next time he woke up, the morning sun was just starting to push its way through the threadbare curtains and Kurt heard someone puttering around in the kitchen. He also smelled coffee brewing and that was enough to wake him fully. He sat up, yawning and stretched the kinks out of his neck and back. He hated sleeping on the couch. It was lumpy and uncomfortable and he was always in a bad mood for a few hours after he woke.

"Morning."

Kurt turned to see Blaine heading into the living room with two cups of coffee, passing one to Kurt.

"Morning," Kurt replied, taking a sip of his coffee immediately to avoid the kiss he knew was coming. "Rachel up yet?"

"I haven't heard anything from her room. Did she even come home last night?" Blaine asked.

"She may not have," Kurt agreed. "She and Mark were looking mighty friendly by the time we left."

"Well, good," Blaine said. "From what you've told me, those two have been dancing around each other long enough."

Just as Kurt was about to reply, the sound of a key slipping into the lock and the door creaking open interrupted their conversation.

"Good morning, Rachel!" Kurt called out. "There's fresh coffee in the pot."

Blaine hid a laugh behind his mug at the silence that greeted him.

"Oh," Rachel replied walking into the living. "I didn't expect you guys to be up so early."

She was dressed in the same clothes she'd had on last night and her hair was pulled back into a ponytail, something Rachel only did when she was running late and didn't have time to style it properly.

"I'm just gonna go hop in the shower," she said nervously.

"Good for her," Blaine said, once they were alone again.

"Good for her," Kurt agreed.

"So, hey. You weren't in bed this morning."

"Yeah, sorry," Kurt said, trying to think of what to say that wasn't a complete lie. "I just, couldn't sleep so, I came out here to watch TV and must have just drifted off."

"Everything okay?"

Kurt nodded and inwardly winced at the look of concern on Blaine's face. "Yeah, just, you know, one of those nights," he replied.

"Okay. How do pancakes sound for breakfast?"

"They sound delicious," Kurt said.

They worked together to whip up some vegan pancakes from a mix Kurt had found that actually tasted really good. Kurt sliced some fruit to go with it for him and Rachel while Blaine popped some turkey sausage links in the microwave. Everything was just about done and Kurt was refilling their mugs when Rachel came back out of the shower. She said nothing as she fixed a plate of food and poured herself some coffee. She sat at the table, resolutely ignoring Kurt and Blaine who were sitting less than five feet away.

"Did you have a good evening, Rachel?" Kurt asked.

"Yes, it was perfectly pleasant," she replied coolly.

"Rachel, it's fine that you hooked up with Mark. Hell, I'm happy you did," he added.

"I know it's fine. I just… I didn't want you to see me like that," she explained.

"Rachel, I've seen you in worse conditions and in less clothing than how you were when you came home."

"Yes, well, that still doesn't mean I want you to see me taking The Walk of Shame."

The trio ate in silence for the next few minutes. When Rachel was done, she stood up and cleaned her dishes. "I'm heading out," she said. "Amy said she would help me find a dress for the party tomorrow night."

"I still don't know why you won't let me help you," Kurt said.

"Because I still remember what happened the last time you tried to give me a make-over."

"Oh my god. Seriously? That was, like, three years ago and you got the guy. I think you can let it go."

"I do not forget so easily, Hummel," she said before flouncing out of the apartment.

The apartment was silent after Rachel's exit. Kurt huffed into his coffee and stabbed the last bite of his pancake a little more forcefully than was necessary. He couldn't believe Rachel was still holding a grudge over that stupid Grease makeover.

"Well," Blaine said, clearing his throat. "Why don't you go shower while I clean up? You seem a little tense."

"Sorry," Kurt said, deflating as he sighed. "I should know better than to fall asleep on that crappy couch. I'm always cranky in the morning."

"It's fine," Blaine said, kissing him on the cheek as he passed by with their dishes.

Kurt tried to grin, but had a feeling it looked more like a grimace. "Thanks," he replied and headed to the safety of their small bathroom.

He couldn't keep going like this. Next year, Blaine would be moving in with them and there was barely room for the bed he currently had. The possibility of getting something bigger was completely out of the question. Kurt either had to learn to deal with it or just tell Blaine the truth. Honestly, he knew what he had to do, he just wasn't sure how Blaine was going to react. And he never would know if he just didn't tell him. So, after they'd both showered, Kurt sat on the couch and waited for Blaine to join him.

"Hey," Blaine said, as he finally joined Kurt. "What's the plan for today?"

"I have to tell you something," Kurt blurted out.

"Um, okay. Is this something good or bad?"

"Um, neither?" Kurt replied. "I mean, it's not like the best news ever, but I don't think it's horrible. I'm not breaking up with you and I haven't, like, cheated on you or anything."

"Well, that's good."

Kurt smiled weakly in return. "I'm not even really sure how to say this without sounding like a horrible person, though."

"We've always been completely honest with each other, Kurt. I promise, as long as you haven't murdered someone, I'll be fine with whatever you have to say."

"I hate cuddling," Kurt said, practically interrupting Blaine.

Blaine said nothing, but immediately moved back several inches and removed his hand from where it had been resting on Kurt's knee.

"No," Kurt said, moving forward and placing his hand on Blaine's. "Not like that. Just, like, at night. When we're sleeping."

"Did I do something?" Blaine asked.

"Not explicitly. But, you're like this little furnace and I get really overheated and wake up kind of sweaty and gross all the time. And I just tried to give myself time to adjust to it because I've never shared a bed with anyone, so I didn’t know how that whole thing worked, really, but it hasn't stopped being awkward for me and I barely sleep when you're here which is why you found me on the couch this morning and I'm really sorry."

Kurt had to bite his lips to stop himself from rambling. Blaine just looked so sad and Kurt hated that he was the one that made Blaine look like that.

"So, um, what do you suggest we do?" Blaine asked.

"I don't know. I mean, my bed is so small it's pretty much impossible not to sleep spooned up together somehow. What do you want to do?"

"I'll just… I can sleep on the couch," Blaine said.

"No, Blaine. The couch is awful."

"Well, what else do you suggest?" Blaine snapped, standing up and starting to pace. "The floor isn't any better than the couch."

"I don't know!" Kurt yelled. "I don't know what to do to fix this. I love you and you mean everything to me, and I don't know what to do about the fact that I hate sharing a bed with you."

Blaine swiped a hand down his face and came to a stop in front of the small window that looked into the apartment building next door.

"I need to go somewhere else," he said making his way down the hall.

"Blaine, wait, please," Kurt said.

"I can't right now, okay? Just… let me think about this for a bit and then we can figure out what to do," Blaine said as he locked himself in Kurt's bedroom.

That could have gone better, Kurt thought, chuckling darkly to himself. God, Blaine must hate him. What was wrong with him? Blaine was gorgeous and sexy and so loving and tender and amazing and all that stupid shit you think about the person you're madly in love with, but the facts remained. Kurt couldn't change how he felt about the cuddling thing anymore than he could change his feelings for Blaine. He just hoped Blaine came back soon so they could work this out.

Unfortunately, Rachel came back first and found Kurt on the couch, eating actual greasy potato chips out of the bag and watching Les Mis.

"Oh my God," Rachel said as soon as she saw him and dropped her bags on the floor. "What happened? Did you and Blaine break up?"

"Nothing nearly so dramatic," Kurt replied. "Yet."

"What's wrong?"

Kurt sighed and paused the DVD on Liam Neeson's scowling face. He put the bag of chips on the coffee table and told Rachel the whole sad, stupid story.

"And I just… I don't know how to fix this, Rachel," he concluded. "It's been long enough that if I was going to get used to it, it would have happened by now. And Blaine must hate me and think I hate him touching me and it's just awful."

"Oh, Kurt. I'm sorry."

"And what are we going to do next year? Blaine was going to move in with us, with me, and that plan is probably completely out the window now."

"We could look for a bigger apartment?" Rachel shrugged. "I mean, with three of us paying rent, we could probably afford something with a little more room and maybe you could get a bigger bed?"

"I don't know," Kurt mumbled. "I should probably wait to make sure Blaine still wants to move in here."

"I do."

Kurt and Rachel looked up, surprised to see Blaine standing there as they hadn't even heard the door to Kurt's bedroom open.

"I'll let you two talk," Rachel said as she disappeared into her bedroom.

"Hi," Kurt said nervously, standing to greet Blaine.

"Hi."

"I'm sorry – " they both started at the same time.

"Please, let me," Blaine said. "I'm sorry about storming out earlier. I just needed some time to sort out what you were actually telling me and what my head told me you were saying."

"And?"

"And we'll figure something out," Blaine assured him. "Rachel is right, we could maybe look for a bigger place. I was planning on coming back out for spring break and by then I should know which colleges I got into and any scholarships and all that. So, I should have a better idea of what my financial situation will be and what I would be able to afford for rent."

"You're not mad?" Kurt said.

"I was," Blaine admitted. "And a little hurt. It just sounded like you were saying you hated me touching you, but I know that's not true."

"I promise, it's only when I sleep," Kurt reassured him. "I love cuddling with you on the couch when we watch movies when you run your hands through my hair. And being able to walk down the street holding your hand is probably the best thing about living here."

"I love doing all that, too," Blaine said.

Kurt stopped trying to resist the invisible thread that always seemed to pull him to Blaine, and practically ran into his arms. "I love you," he said.

"I love you, too," Blaine replied.

Kurt kissed him as they pulled away, just to reassure himself that Blaine really was there and did still love him.

"What do you want to do about tonight?" Kurt asked hesitantly.

"I can sleep on the couch. Aht!" he said, holding up a hand to stop Kurt's protest. "I promise, it'll be fine. I don't mind scrunching up a bit and I can just guilt you into giving me a massage in the morning to get the kinks out," Blaine said with a wink.

"Done. Yes, of course," Kurt agreed.

He stepped back into Blaine's arms and they just stood there, holding each other in the middle of the tiny New York apartment. "Thank you," Kurt whispered.

"Is everything okay?" Rachel called.

"Yeah, it's fine," Kurt called out.

"Good," Rachel said joining them back in the living room. "Because I have the perfect solution and I don't know why I didn't think of it before."

"What's that?" Blaine asked.

"You guys can sleep in my bed when Blaine's here!" she said with a big smile on her face. "I have a queen, so it's definitely big enough that you can be in the same bed and Kurt won't be in any danger of being squished by Blaine."

"Hey!" Blaine said.

"Rachel, no," Kurt said. "It's your bed. We couldn't do that to you."

"Nonsense," she said, waving them off. "I offered and I already changed the sheets on my bed and yours, so we are switching rooms for the rest of Blaine's visit. In return, you have to wash the bedding after Blaine leaves."

"Not a problem," Kurt assured her quickly. "I can do that."

"Are you sure, Rachel?" Blaine asked. "I feel like we'd be putting you out."

"Of course you're not," she said. "Kurt's bed is plenty big for little ol' me and it's only a couple days at a time. I promise, it's fine."

"Okay. Thanks, Rachel," Kurt said.

"You're welcome. Now, what do you boys want for lunch? I found this new tofu recipe online that had red pepper and cumin in it," she said as she wandered off into the kitchen. Kurt just hurried after her to try and avert any more kitchen disasters that usually happened when she tried to cook. They fire department really didn't need to make another visit this month.




Later that night, after Kurt and Blaine got ready for bed, they made their way Rachel's room. They looked in horror at the multitude of pictures of her that seemed to stare at them from every available surface.

"That's not gonna work," Kurt said as he started turning them all face down.

Once all the pictures had been covered in some manner, they pulled back the pink, ruffled comforter and climbed into bed. Kurt reached over to turn off the bedside lamp and rolled back over to face Blaine.

Blaine who was currently as far away from Kurt as he could get without falling off the bed and gripping his pillow so tightly his knuckles were white.

"Blaine," Kurt sighed and reached out a hand.

"Sorry," Blaine said. "I just… I'm not sure what I'm allowed to do anymore."

"You can still kiss me good night," Kurt replied.

Blaine leaned in and kissed Kurt softly, letting his lips linger. Kurt ran his fingers through the loose curls at the back of Blaine's neck and held him close, nipping at Blaine's bottom lip and getting a little moan in return. They eventually pulled back and Blaine settled down, much closer to the middle of his side of the bed. Kurt's hand was resting on the mattress between them and Blaine reached out to cover it with his own.

"Is this okay?" he asked.

"Yeah," Kurt said. "Thank you for understanding. I know this is weird and not what you wanted, but…"

"Hey, shh," Blaine said rubbing his thumb over Kurt's knuckles. "It's okay. Really. At least we're figuring this stuff out now and not waiting until we actually move in together and have it all explode. I mean, this is what relationships are about – working through things together and finding a compromise."

"Mm," Kurt hummed in response, his eyes already falling closed, heavy with sleep.

"Sleep," Blaine said, pressing a small kiss to Kurt's hand. "Tomorrow is New Year's Eve and we have a party to go to and we'll kiss each other at midnight and next year will be just as amazing as this one."

"Mm. Love you," Kurt whispered.

"Love you, too," Blaine replied. "Good night."




Kurt woke up the next morning, more rested than he had been since Blaine arrived. He'd rolled over onto his back at some point and Blaine had rolled onto his front. Their hands were still joined, though, and Kurt couldn't help smiling. He rolled over to press a kiss to Blaine's bare shoulder before climbing out of bed to get the coffee started. The pot was almost finished when Blaine stumbled bleary-eyed into the kitchen.

"Morning," he mumbled, dropping his head to Kurt's shoulder.

"Morning, sweetheart," Kurt said.

"Did you sleep well?"

"I did," Kurt replied. "Thank you."

"That's good. Wanna go to that diner down the street for breakfast? I've got a hankering for some cinnamon rolls."

"Well, who am I to deny you one of your hankerings?" Kurt teased.

"You're the best," Blaine said, before heading back to the bedroom with his coffee.

"No. You are," Kurt whispered to no one.

They were fine. Of course they were fine. They would always work things out. They were too important to each other to let silly things like this get in the way. Kurt laughed to himself and quickly gulped down his coffee when he heard the shower turn on. It was New Year's Eve and they had a lot to be grateful for this year. Kurt planned on making sure this year ended just as well as it had begun.

And that meant helping his amazing boyfriend get a little dirty in the shower.

THE END

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