Nov. 16, 2012, 6:05 a.m.
This Isn't Home But It Is
Reaction!Fic to the Glease episode. Top!Kurt, Bottom!Blaine..you know I'm really upset with Blaine when he is bottom. Loosely based off of the hallway scene then branches off into what I think happened (more like what I wanted to happen)from there.
E - Words: 1,996 - Last Updated: Nov 16, 2012 817 0 3 3 Categories: Angst, General, Characters: Blaine Anderson, Kurt Hummel, Tags: friendship, OMG CREYS,
This isn't home but it is.
"I'm just really sorry Kur—" Blaine attempted to say in a whisper making Kurt's eyes shoot up from their spot on the floor.
"I really do not want to hear your apologies."
"Kurt," Blaine piratically begged.
"Will you please just let me explain, you didn't know what happened."
Kurt shook his head fighting his tears. He hates this, it wasn't supposed to happen. Not to him, not to Blaine. Not to them. He looks back to Blaine, the love of his life, his soul mate..and he sees that Blaine is torn. He had even seen it when he was singing earlier in the play-but it just wasn't enough. Yet, there Blaine was, as dreamy as ever... his teen angel, his teenage dream...and he was just standing there right in from of him for the first time since Blaine shattered his heart, just standing with those big sad brown eyes, and Kurt actually hates himself for what he was about to do—but he needed to get his point across. He needed to let Blaine know exactly how he feels.
"Kurt." Blaine brokenly called again, waiting for an answer. Kurt glanced around the empty hall, wrapping his arms tighter around himself, and shifting on his feet.
"What are you going to tell me Blaine? That it wasn't serious? That you didn't care about him—"
"I didn't care." Blaine choked, interrupting Kurt.
Shaking his head Kurt fought all the emotions he wasn't trying to show.
"Do you think that matters to me? Relationships are about trust...and I don't trust you anymore."
Kurt almost choked, himself, on his last few words as he took in the expression on Blaine's face. He was the reason for that face. Even after all that he has been through he still can't handle the thought of hurting him.
He can't do this.
Kurt had full intentions of going back to Lima and talking things out with Blaine, that was until he had saw him...and now standing in the hall with him and he is looking like that Kurt knew it was going to be harder than he thought.
He just had to get out of there, get away from him...he needed to do—...
"It was stupid coming here." Kurt said the words before he could even close his mouth.
"Rachel was right, this isn't my home anymore." there it was, the final nail in the coffin.
Kurt doesn't know how Blaine takes it because he turned on his heels and walked away. It is what he needed to do, just for now. He may have said that Lima wasn't his home, but his home is still wherever Blaine is...
This isn't home the words played over and over in Blaine's head as he just stood there watching Kurt walk away.
He's never seen Kurt like this.
So broken.
So sad...so insecure.
He had made sure to always keep his arms around himself protectively each time Blaine approached. His eyes gazing cautiously at him..but for too long. Kurt also looked tired and thinner...and he just can't believe how badly he had screwed up. He just continued to stand there in the hallway as people walked passed him cheering about a job well done on the musical...and they still don't notice, or maybe they just don't care.
He was the one who hurt Kurt, not the other way around.
He wondered how he could fix this orif he could even he could fix this at all.
Kurt had said that this wasn't his home, which meant that Blaine wasn't either.
When everyone gathered into the choir room Blaine felt like he wasn't even there. Everyone was celebrating and laughing and having a good time and he felt as if he wasn't an existence in this entire world. He pulled out his cellphone and tried texting Kurt, but no reply.
On his way home he tried calling Kurt.. once, twice, three times...but it went right to voice mail.
He promised himself the next time he saw Kurt he would tell him everything..but now he wishes now more than ever that he could just take everything back.
When he got home, his house felt even emptier than usual. His house, this wasn't his home. He walked up into his room and stripped from his stage costume. He found a random pair of sweats and a t-shirt laying on the floor, he stared at them for a moment wondering if he had done the laundry or not before shrugging and just putting it on. He didn't even look at himself in the mirror as he turned off the light and crossed over to his bed, the picture of Kurt still on his night stand.
Blaine closed his eyes in that maybe for once he could sleep.
But it turns out like every night that he was wrong.
Kurt was halfway to the airport when he decided that he just wanted to stay at his house for the night. He was too tired and too damn wrecked to deal with an almost 6 hour flight with Rachel going on with her problems..when he didn't even want to deal with his own.
So when he pulled up into the familiar driveway Kurt sighed in relief. For the first time since being back in Ohio, he felt at home.
The house however was dark—which meant that Finn wasn't back from the school and Carole and Burt were probably off god knows where doing political business.
So it was just him.
That's okay. Kurt thought to himself as he opened the door and set his keys inside of the bowl.
I'm not really up for a family reunion at this moment.
A feeling of nostalgia washed over him as he walked around the house and he started reminiscing of all the good times and all of the bad times that he has had here.
Like ever day arguments with Finn over the breakfast table.
Or the days that Blaine would come over really early just so he could eat breakfast with them and talk sports with Burt.
Shit Kurt mentally cursed at himself, shaking the thoughts out of his head.
Even when he didn't want to think about Blaine, he thought about him. Soon Kurt yawned and tiredness soon got the best of him of Kurt so he wandered upstairs and disappeared into his room.
But as soon as Kurt's head hit the pillow memories of Blaine rushed through him. Memories of what they did on this bed, in a rush before his father came home. Or the times the just laid around the room listening to music and reading Vogue. Or that time when Blaine just sat on top of him and wouldn't stop tickling him until Kurt finally gave in and kissed him when they were supposed to be studying.
Kurt missed Blaine.
He missed everything about him.
His smell.
His eyes.
His voice.
His touch.
As Kurt got lost in his thoughts the door bell ringing brought him out of his daze.
Sighing heavily he headed down the stairs figuring it was just Finn and he forgot his keys.
Only when he got to the door he finds and equally miserable Blaine.
They just stare at each other for a few minutes before Kurt is pulling Blaine in and smashing their lips together desperately and Blaine gasps out but doesn't say a word.
He wants this just as much as Kurt wants this.
He knows that he should talk but he honestly doesn't care at the moment because that is Kurt's tongue down his throat, and Kurt's hands pulling off his clothes...and before he knows it Kurt's clothes are gathered on the floor with his, in a messy pile... and Blaine is getting pushed harshly onto the couch.
Kurt crawls on top of Blaine their fully erect penis's brushing against each other making them each moan.
It's been way too long and Kurt can't really bring himself to stop, the feeling of Blaine's warm skin against his is almost too much too take.
They are both breathing heavier now and for the first time since Kurt seen him at the door Kurt looked down at Blaine, his eyes blown full with lust... and glimmering with life, the first time Kurt has seen any life in them since he left Blaine to go to New York City..and Kurt knew in that moment how lonely Blaine must have felt.
But than sadness welled up inside of him again, because he was lonely too, and he didn't cheat on Blaine.
Kurt groaned out in frustration dragging his fingertips down Blaine's back making Blaine throw his head back.
Kurt sucked on the skin there making it bright, red, wet, and glistening as his fingers traveled further down.
Neither of them still did not speak, in fear of what the other one might say.
Kurt then rested his hands on Blaine's hips, pulling him closer before Kurt grabbed his cock and directed it to Blaine's puckered hole,
Kurt shivered for a moment closing his eyes and wondering who else had seen Blaine in this way.
When Kurt opened his eyes Blaine whimpered and Kurt just adjusted his hips and pushed in making Blaine jerk with a loud shout.
There was no teasing, no preparing.. just Kurt.
Blaine could feel Kurt all around him and he never wanted it to stop.
Even as Kurt was pounding hard into him.
His breathes just grew faster.. more labored and he pressed back with just as much strength.
He wanted it, he needed it..
He had to know that all of this was real.
Their thrusts grew faster and sweat began to trickle down their chests.
Then like a thousand times before Kurt pressed against that one spot making Blaine scream out louder than before and Kurt just kept on jerking his hips against it, his hips thrusting faster and faster,,
They were both getting close...they felt their muscles tensing and after one last thrust Blaine came hard without Kurt even laying on finger on him...leaving Blaine clench around Kurt who came seconds after.
After Kurt pulls out of Blaine, Blaine is already making his way off the couch.
But Kurt pulls him back by the hand.
"Stay." he silently adds making more room on the couch to lay down.
"I thought are mad at me?"
Kurt just looked longingly into the boys eyes that he loves most.
"I'm not mad at you. I'm just hurt."
Blaine goes to talk further but a raise of Kurt's hand stopped him in his tracks.
"We will talk about everything in the morning. Now go to sleep." Kurt demanded after Blaine yawned into his chest.
Blaine carefully wraps himself around Kurt's waist and lazily falls asleep for the first time in what feels like weeks.
When Kurt knows Blaine is asleep. He sighs heavily.
This could be potential of something great. Kurt thought looking down at Blaine beside him.
Or something bad. Kurt almost regrets it.
But he could never regret Blaine.
In the morning when Blaine woke up Kurt was already gone and the smell of breakfast and coffee filled the house.
Blaine smiled as he remembered similar memories from the past.
But this isn't the past.
This is the present.
The present where Kurt is upset with you.
Getting up Blaine got dressed and headed out into the kitchen, rubbing his head.
Kurt looked nervous as he ran around the kitchen setting down a plate and cup of coffee in his usual spot.
"Sit down. Eat." he said, sounding a little more lively than yesterday.
They both ate their meals in silence... and when they were done Blaine looked up from his plate.
"What is all of this supposed to mean?" he asked suddenly. He was honestly confused.
"For now it's a something that could be more, because even though how much has changed, my feelings for you never changed." Kurt says surprisingly calm.
"I mean what I said before though. I don't trust you."
"Can I tell you the whole story Kurt?"
Kurt sighed into his coffee, he really did owe Blaine that much. But he wasn't ready and...the wheels in his head started turning and Blaine could sense his hesitation.
"Not now. It's okay. I get it. This is already a lot to take in at once." Blaine rushes out before fussing around with his hair again nervously.
Kurt looked up into Blaine's eyes and smiled shyly.
"So where does this leave us?" Blaine asks his throat dry all of the sudden.
"Really close friends for now." Kurt says simply...his bright blue eyes gleaming a little to bright, even being with Blaine like this he missed terribly.
You'll always be my home.
Also if you haven't followed me on tumblr and you want to my url is sexyfacesandgaspains
Awesome right! ;)
Comments
I really enjoyed this and definitely thought that Finchel could have been featured less last night so Klaine could have more time. If only what happened in your story actually happened after that scene. The scene might have been sad but Chris and Darren did an awesome job with it and I can't wait until things start to get better for them. I look forward to reading your future stories and have fun at Breaking Dawn Pt 2.
Oh you are very sweet! l'll be sure to enjoy Breaking Dawn pt 2 tomorrow! I am going with my sisters after all then we are coming back and watching Glee all night, haha. Did you read this on fanfiction.net too? Because your username seems really familar to me. But yes, I do have to agree, Darren and Chris did a fantastic job with the screen time that they had. They said so much just from their facial expressions alone...and I too can't wait for things to start looking up for them. But before it gets better we have a super action packed super hero episode of Glee that I'm looking forward to, because it seems that Glee remembered that they are actually a comedy. Haha. And I am looking forward to hearing more from you in the future. You are a sweet heart. xoxo Lauren sexyfacesandgaspains
wish this was canon..... :)