Based off of 'Small Bump' by Ed Sheeran, Kurt and Blaine lose their baby and Blaine helps Kurt cope. One-shot!
So my friend fell in love with Ed Sheeran and made me download all his songs, and when I heard Small Bump (the acoustic version), this entire scene flew through my head and I had to write it! I hope you like it :)
Song is Small Bump (acoustic) by Ed Sheeran
Enjoy
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Kurt sat on the window seat looking outside, watching the snow fall. Soft pale light shone against his face, flooding it with an effervescent glow. It would have been beautiful if Kurt was happy. It would have stopped Blaine's heart if Kurt wasn't dying on the inside, holding it all in with a stony face and a week of silence.
Blaine sighed from the doorway where he watched his husband try to hold back the ruin that was inevitable. He had been so in love, and just like that it was taken away from him, without so much as a hello. Blaine felt so powerless.
He was hurting too, but not as badly as Kurt. The porcelain man had wanted this more than anything. He'd been dreaming about her, he had started picking out the colour scheme for her room, and had started designing all her clothes because, "Nothing but the best for the Anderson-Hummel's." He had gone to every appointment; he had felt her first kick, her first punch. He had picked out the surrogate mother and had been with her until the bitter end.
He had loved with everything he was, and now she was gone.
Blaine retreated from the doorway and went into their bedroom.
The bed was cold again, another sleepless night.
He sighed and picked up his guitar that was rested in the far corner, shiny and beautiful, worn in but strong, and familiar to the tunes of Blaine.
He strummed at it lazily for a moment, his heart still with Kurt before coming back to himself and started tuning the guitar.
Words wouldn't make anything better, they never could. But song, it has the power to transition above simple spoken word and bind together the heart and the soul. Blaine was going to write Kurt a song; because that was the only thing he knew how to do, because when a heart was breaking it needed to be bound, because Blaine needed to let Kurt know he was here for him even if he didn't know how, because Blaine loved Kurt and this is what he does.
~~~
Five hours later and Kurt hadn't moved. The snow was falling heavier, and the light was gone. The earth hadn't stopped spinning. Time hadn't frozen. Little Elizabeth was gone and it seemed like it didn't even matter. Blaine sighed and entered the living room holding his guitar.
"Hey," he said softly not wanting to startle Kurt.
The person in question didn't respond. But then again he never did.
"I have something for you," Blaine continued undeterred. He sat down next to Kurt, "if you want it." Kurt turned to look at him and gave him an affirmative nod and a small smile.
It shot through Blaine like an arrow.
He looked so broken.
Blaine gulped and adjusted his grip on the guitar. "This is a song I wrote," he said. "Just now encase you were wondering where I was. Umm…it's called Small bump and I figured these were some things you'd say to Elizabeth if you could and…yeah. I hope you like it."
Blaine was nervous. It was such a personal song. Sure love songs were personal but love is a universal emotion, everybody can connect to it. This was specific and heart breaking, only a handful of person could truly understand how it feels, and Blaine wept for those poor souls who could.
Taking a deep breath Blaine started playing hoping to god this helped in some way.
'You're just a small bump unborn, in four months you're brought to life,'
Kurt's eyes widened and Blaine's heart started beating faster.
'You might be left with Blaine's hair, but you'll have your father's eyes,'
Kurt gave a small smile at that. It was in their plans; Elizabeth would have Blaine's unruly curls and Kurt's bright eyes. She would have Blaine's smile and Kurt's skin and a voice that sang loud and true.
She would be beautiful.
'I'll hold your body in my hands, be as gentle as I can, but for now your scan of my unmade plans
small bump in four months, you'll open your eyes'
Kurt stared at Blaine with wide eyes.
'I'll hold you tightly, I'll give you nothing but truth,
If you're not inside me, I'll put my future in you'
Kurt let out a shaky breath.
'You are my one, and only
You can wrap your fingers round my thumb and hold me tight
Oh you are my one, and only
You can wrap your fingers round my thumb and hold me tight
And you'll be alright'
Tears welled in his clear eyes.
'You're just a small bump unknown and you'll grow into your skin
With a smile like his and a dimple beneath your chin'
Kurt closed his eyes; the image was so clear.
'Finger nails the size of a half grain of rice
And eyelids closed to be soon opened wide a small bump,
In four months you'll open your eyes'
Kurt let out a ragged sob.
'I'll hold you tightly, I'll give you nothing but truth,
If you're not inside me, I'll put my future in you'
He shook his head not letting the word get to him, refusing to let them get through.
'You are my one, and only
You can wrap your fingers round my thumb and hold me tight'
The images bombarded him away.
'Oh you are my one, and only'
Startlingly clear and sweet.
'You can wrap your fingers round my thumb and hold me tight'
Heartbreaking.
'And you'll be alright'
Kurt put his head in his hands, silent sobs pouring through him.
'You can lie with me, with your tiny feet when you're half asleep,
I'll leave you be
Right in front of me for a couple weeks
So I can keep you safe'
"And I didn't!" Kurt cried lifting his head from his arms. He looked at Blaine who just kept playing, sadness radiating off of him like heat.
'Cause you are my one, and only
You can wrap your fingers round my thumb and hold me tight
Oh you are my one, and only
You can wrap your fingers round my thumb and hold me tight
And you'll be alright'
"She's dead!" Kurt yelled. "Oh my god she's dead!" Blaine nodded, licking his lips before singing the last two lines.
'You're just a small bump unborn just for four months then torn from life
Maybe you were needed up there but we're still unaware as why'
The last strands of guitar notes lingered in the air before Blaine put his guitar on the soft carpet and Kurt threw himself into Blaine's arms. They hugged each other tightly; hot tears streaked down Kurt's face and Blaine just held him close.
"It's okay," he said playing with Kurt's hair. "You're okay now, it will all be okay."
Kurt shook his head, trying to bury himself into Blaine.
He wanted to hide.
He wanted to feel normal again.
He wanted Elizabeth alive.
"Why?" Kurt keened, his voice soft and pitiful and broken. He had finally broken his silence and now the walls were tumbling down. "Why?" he cried again biting his lip in a useless attempt to stop crying. "Why would this happen to us, Blaine? Why? After all the shit we've been through why would they take my baby from me?"
Blaine shook his head not sure how to answer. "Because," he started slowly stroking Kurt's hair softly. "She was needed elsewhere."
Kurt let out a loud sob and Blaine held him tighter, curling the taller boy into his chest.
"She loves you, you know." Blaine said with a small smile. "She's probably looking down at you right now with her big blue eyes filled with sadness because she doesn't know why daddy's crying. And she's aching to give you a hug and wrap her tiny little arms around you because she loves you and you love her. One day you'll see her properly, you'll meet with a wide smile and your beautiful face will be the first thing she sees when she opens her eyes, and she'll stop crying and smile because she knows that in your arms is where she's meant to be. But for now she's too good for this earth and we're going to have to suffer through this together, like we always have, because we're strong enough to do this. Because we have to be strong enough to survive this."
Blaine looked down at Kurt who was still crying into his chest. Gently he took Kurt out of his chest and kissed the man's forehead. He moved to look Kurt dead in the eye and said; "I promise you, we will get through this."
Kurt nodded still biting his lip. Blaine gently wiped the tears off of Kurt's cheeks and placed a soft kiss on his lips. He moved back a hair's width.
"I love you," he whispered stroking Kurt's cheek with his thumb. "Forever and always."
Kurt nodded and swallowed thickly. "It just hurts so much."
"She's not gone for good," Blaine answered. "Now just wasn't her time."
Kurt sighed, pressing his forehead against Blaine's and closing his eyes. "I love you," he replied. "Always and forever."
Blaine moved forwards and gave Kurt a gentle loving kiss, short but powerful.
Things seemed bad now but it would get better, it always did. Elizabeth was gone now but they'd try again, giving up wasn't an option. Life would keep going, hearts would keep beating, they'll never stop loving, and one day, baby sounds will fill their nursery and the sounds of little feet will pitter along the floor. Until then, Blaine supposed, they'd find a way to be alright.
End Notes: Thoughts, comments, concerns? Review! (: