Blaine,

I don’t really know how to start. It’s complicated, even for me, to understand.

But I'm going to try and put things as simple as I possibly can, and I’ll try and explain everything. From the start.

As I’ve already told you, I'm not used to have friends. Let alone friends that are as close to me as you are.

 I got chased away from my old school with death threats. I was abused almost everyday day and I never had anyone to share a table with at lunch. I was always alone.

And being alone, you learn a few things. You learn to stop trusting people and you learn to not love anyone but yourself. It’s like you create these kinds of walls around you to protect yourself from being more than physically hurt.

And I was okay with that. I didn’t know anything else.

But then you came along. You came into my life and somehow you managed to break down those walls I’d been building for years.

You were so kind, so understanding. And for the first time I felt needed. You made me feel like I actually mattered.

You’re the only one that’s ever been able to make me feel that way, Blaine.

You made me feel things, you made me trust you, made me your friend.

And it scared the shit out of me. It still does. Because I’m not used to it. I’m not used to being able to trust people. I’m not used to the kind words and the soft touches. And I'm not used to this warm and fuzzy feeling I get inside every time I see you.

It freaks me out. Because when I feel like this, it means that you’re so much more able to hurt me, it makes me that much more vulnerable. It makes it dangerous for me to be close to you.

 Before I thought that all I wanted was for someone to see me, to accept me. Maybe even for someone to love me.

And now here you are. You see me. You accept me. You even love me.

And… I can’t take it. It feels too good and it hurts too much.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. But right now; I just can’t.

So, basically; it was lovely being your friend and I really appreciate all you’ve done for me.

But this is goodbye. There’s just no other way.

     –Kurt.

(And I would write that I love you, but it’d just hurt too much.)

 Sorry.