SPOILERS 3X13! I am an uncreative titler, so there you have it: Kurt tells Blaine about Karofsky. Cute, funny, silly, jealous!Blaine, Brittanklaine. TUMBLR IS klainebowsandquirrelmort. COMPLETE. ONE-SHOT.
The One in Which Kurt Tells Blaine About Karofsky
"I need to talk to you."
"Okay..." Blaine scrunched his eyebrows together, trying to remember the last time he did something stupid enough to make Kurt angry. The only thing he could think of was the "Love Shack" dance half an hour ago; had he gone too far in his amorous moves? He allowed himself to be dragged by the hand to a quieter corner of Breadstix. Settling down across from Kurt, he motioned for the older boy to speak.
Kurt shifted nervously in the booth. He didn't really know how to begin, just that he had to. He stretched a hand over the tabletop to capture one of Blaine's. "Okay, so, this past week, I've been getting lots of...well, valentines, I suppose, from someone claiming to be my 'secret admirer.'" Blaine's eyes immediately darkened, but his face remained stoic. "They were little cards and trinkets and whatnot, and they were all signed 'love, your secret admirer.' I thought they were from you."
Blaine's eyebrows shot upward. "Me? I don't think it's exactly a secret that I admire you, Kurt."
"I know, I know, but—" Kurt covered their clasped hands with his free one. "—I thought you were being cute or coy or something because you couldn't be at school with me." He took a deep breath. "Well, obviously, it wasn't you."
"Obviously."
Despite the gravity of the conversation, Kurt couldn't help by smile internally at the hint of jealousy in Blaine's normally light voice. He could practically see the wheels turning in his boyfriend's head, trying to come up with a gay guy at McKinley who was better at romance than he was. Shaking his amusement off, Kurt continued. "It was Karofsky."
Kurt watched all the blood drain from Blaine's face. "Wait, was it a prank? Did he hurt you?"
Kurt shook his head quickly. "No, baby, I'm fine. He just...he thinks he's in love with me."
Blaine let that sink in. Karofsky...Dave Karofsky...is in love...with my boyfriend? He wasn't necessarily jealous; he hated to sound so haughty, even if only in his own mind, but he was fairly sure that Kurt wasn't going to leave him from some overgrown toddler with anger management issues who apparently watched too many romcoms in the past week. He had a hard time wrapping his brain around the fact that his boyfriend's abuser was in love with him and chose to declare such feelings, on Valentine's Day, no less. Trying very hard to keep his cool, Blaine managed a flat "Is that so?"
Kurt nodded sadly. He knew that stony look on Blaine's face; it was the same one he got right after Kurt laughed with that guy in the food court at the mall in Cincinnati over winter break. No matter what Blaine told him—or was telling himself—Kurt knew the truth: he was jealous. "Yeah. He said he thinks he's in love with me, after one conversation in Scandals."
That broke the calm facade. "Wait, you went to Scandals with this shmuck?"
Now really fighting a smile, Kurt squeezed the hand he held with both of his own. "No, sweetie, I went to Scandals with you, and while you were getting your groove on all night with Slut-Pig, I was sitting at the bar." Blaine flushed red. "Karofsky came up to me, and we talked for a few minutes. He told me that things were better for him at his new school, and that he was starting to accept himself for who he is, and I told him I was proud of him. That's it—but apparently it was enough for him to...recognize some feelings."
"For you."
"For me."
Blaine let out a harsh sigh. "Okay. Okay. So...what happens now?"
Kurt laughed. "Nothing, silly."
"Nothing?"
"Nothing."
Blaine didn't understand. "But you just said he's in love with you. I trust you, I do, but I think I'd be more comfortable if...he wasn't...if he didn't...I don't want to be the jealous type, Kurt. I'm trying to be Strong, Mature, Civilized Boyfriend, not Rip-His-Arms-Off-and-Beat-Him-to-Death-With-Them Boyfriend."
"Well, thanks for that," Kurt giggled, ducking as a large, pink, Mylar, heart-shaped balloon drifted his way. "But it's okay to be jealous. Gaga knows I haven't said the most dapper things to Slut-Pig—though I will never take back my comment concerning his obnoxious CW hair. But I'm okay with you...being jealous. It's rather flattering. But you don't have to worry about Karofsky. There's way too much bad blood there to ever be completely under the bridge, and I like being the tall one in the relationship."
Blaine kicked Kurt's shin gently under the table. "Jerk." He sighed. "So...we do nothing?"
"Not exactly. I already talked to him. I told him that I'm in love with you and that he doesn't really love me. He loves the idea of me, the idea of an out-and-proud gay guy who will actually talk to him." He paused. "I did agree to be his friend, though."
Blaine nodded jerkily, running his thumb over the smooth back of Kurt's hand. "That's...I'm okay with that. I am deciding to not feel threatened." He and Kurt shared a silly smile. "I am, however, telling you that I still don't totally trust him, so I want you to be careful around him, to always watch your back, and to tell me if he tries anything that might be construed as inappropriate. Okay?"
Smiling softly, Kurt nodded. "Got it."
"Now kiss me, Valentine." Blaine leaned across the table to capture Kurt's lips with his own, but the older boy slid backward with a coy grin.
"Ah, ah, ah. I don't recall agreeing to be your Valentine. In fact, I haven't talked to you in days. For all I knew, you fell of the face of the Earth—not altogether out of the realm of possibility, considering you just regained your second eye. Why should I be your Valentine? You didn't send me a Gorilla Gram."
Blaine smirked. Two could play that game. "Well I recall shoving you out of the way of a rock-salt-laced slushie and then undergoing surgery so..."
Kurt leaned forward again. "Touch�." He pressed their lips together. The kiss only lasted a few moments, though, for the boys heard a loud whoop from the side. They turned in time to see Santana and Brittany dive into the booth, the former beside Kurt and the latter beside Blaine.
"HOMO BOOTH!" Santana shouted, grinning at Brittany. The two boys rolled their eyes at each other.
"Hey Blainers?" Brittany asked innocently. "So, like, you go to McKinley now, and I have a reputation to uphold, so, will you make out with me?"
Stunned into silence, the two on the opposite side of the booth could only gape as the junior winked their way and kissed Brittany softly for a moment. Then he grabbed Kurt's hand and squeezed.
Brittany clapped her hands and squealed. "Yay! I kissed a dolphin and I get to have lady time with Tanny tonight! This is the best New Year's ever!" Brittany hopped up, snatched Santana's hand, and danced away, dragging the still-shocked girl with her and ignoring her stuttered explanations of what day it actually was.
Blaine and Kurt looked at each other and burst into laughter. Then they surveyed the explosion of pink and red around them. "This year's Valentine's Day is so much better than last year's," Kurt sighed.
"Agreed." Blaine leaned in once more and kissed his boyfriend. He then pulled back and smirked. "So...you wanna go back to my love shack, baby?"