What is happening here? What is Blaine so upset about? Could I have possibly missed all the signs that he didn't want me anymore? I thought we were solid. What is he saying? "I don't like that with every conversation we always end up talking about NYADA…. It's like you can't even wait to get out of here… How is that supposed to make me feel?"

Oh my God, I have been so self-centered lately and talking about my life that I failed to make sure Blaine knew how much I love him. Everything Blaine said was so much to take in. I failed him when all he needed was reassurance from me that I would always be his. Blaine took my hand as we left Miss Pillsbury's office. It wasn't the sure hand that I took hold of so many times in the past. This hand was tentative and that look was scared and lost. I need to make sure he knows my love for him could move mountains. My love for him has always been that strong and will continue to be strong. Blaine doesn't know how much he means to me.

"Um.. I need to go to my locker before we head to class." Blaine still looked confused and lost.

"I'll go with you." I squeezed his hand tightly. He has to know I love him. Arriving at his locker, the last thing I want to even think about is class. Blaine is my soul mate. I'm sure of it. I feel it. His pain is my pain and right now, I'm in a lot of pain, so I can just imagine how much he's hurting. Blaine is digging in his locker quietly. "Hey, can we just skip? I want to skip."

He looked up at me hesitantly. At first, I thought he would say no, but then he sighed in resignation. "Okay." Putting a few books in his bag, Blaine took my hand again as I opened my locker and grabbed a few things. "What do you want to do?" The confident Blaine has left the building and this is what I have right now. I miss him so much and I will miss him so much next year. I never thought about how hard it would be to be without him and that's all Blaine has been thinking about.

"Come with me. It's still early in the day." I grabbed Blaine's hand. "Don't worry Blaine. I told you I love you and you won't be alone. Let's spend some time together. Just me and you. Let's talk. We need to talk. I need to make sure we get through this. It means so much to me." That was code for you are everything to me. I promise, I'll say it when we're alone.

After driving about 30 minutes out into the farmland, I took a turn off the road. "Kurt, where are we going?"

"My dad used to take me here for picnic's after my mom died. I always liked it because it was peaceful." I pulled into a small lot where there was a short pier that jutted out in the water and dragged my sad boyfriend with me. I sat down slowly not taking my eyes off him and pulled him down to sit cross legged in front of me. "I want to talk to you." Blaine smiled sadly at me. He wasn't convinced that I still loved him and wanted everything with him. So many days I waited for the right moment. I think I may have waited too long.

"Okay. I miss talking to you. We've been so busy this school year, that I feel like we don't have this time anymore and you'll be gone soon." The tears welled behind his eyes. I could tell that he was close to letting them loose.

"I-I'm really sorry, Blaine. I …" I had to force myself, no matter how much it hurt, to look him in the eyes. Blaine deserves that from me. He deserves it because I love him. "I'm in love with you and I take for granted that you'll always be by my side. I don't think I would have had the confidence to do any of the NYADA stuff if you didn't help me become me." I reached out to hold both hands. "You won't be alone. My heart will always be with you. It will be with you until we can be together again. I meant it when I said we would spend weekends together. I don't know how, but we'll make it work. I promise." Wow, I need to get to the point. Blaine must think I'm breaking up with him.

"I just don't feel it sometimes Kurt. I know you are excited and I'm very excited for you. This is what you've always wanted. I knew it would happen and I tried.. I really tried to stay excited about it, but all I can think about these days is how you are leaving me alone. My heart aches in my chest sometimes." Blaine let the tears fall. The beautiful man in front of me gave his heart to me and he's expressing himself to me. What a gift I got with Blaine.

"Blaine… " I wiped some of the tears away and kissed him gently on the lips. Those lips, full and loving and sure all the time, but not now. "I'm in so much pain right now too. I could never leave you, not really. We need to think about this. I haven't even gotten into NYADA and maybe I won't. I want my dreams to come true, but you are big part of my dreams."

Blaine tried to control his tears, but hearing me say these things brought more tears to his eyes. "I just know you're it… for me. But, you'll be gone next year with new people just like you with dreams like yours and I'll be this little boy pining away for you. Everyone is going to look so much better than me. You'll forget about me. A year is a long time."

"First of all, you are not a boy." We've had sex enough that I know his manhood is definitely man. "You are my man. Always." He stopped crying and his red rimmed eyes looked like he was trying to understand me. Now's as good a time as any. "I mean always Blaine." I reached into my pocket. I had this ring made a few weeks ago and was just looking for the right time to ask him. Blaine needed to know that I love him as much as he loves me. His look was startled as he watched me retrieve something from my pocket. "I have something that I made for you 3 weeks ago. I was looking for the right time to give it to you. I suppose now is as good a time as any. And.. Maybe you'll understand how much you mean to me. "

I held a platinum band up to his face. It was shiny between my thumb and forefinger. "What is this? You didn't have to go out and buy me a ring." He shook his head like he didn't deserve it.

"I bought it weeks ago and had it engraved. I hope you'll accept this ring because I don't think the inscription applies to anyone but you. This ring could only belong to one person."

"Really?"

"Really Blaine. You are the love of my life too. I'm sorry I didn't say it enough and let you know enough. This ring is my promise to you that we'll start forever right now. Right this second. No more looking around corners for something to happen. I don't even see anyone but you. You know why?"

"No. why?"

"Because when you feel it in here." I held my hand over my heart then took his hand and put it there too. "When you really feel it in here, you never need to look. I know.. I've known from the first time I laid eyes on you." A new batch of tears formed in his eyes, but there was something else there. I think it's understanding.

He took the ring slowly from my hand and looked at the outside inscription as he whispered it. "My Forever Dream. Kurt and Blaine Forever." Then the smile I love so much appeared on his face. How could I ever look at someone else. Chandler could never smile at me the way Blaine does. When Blaine smiles, my whole world lights up and my pulse quickens. That's how I know.

"Read the inside."

Reciting it out loud again, "Because my teenage dream is my forever dream."

"That's what you are to me. I love you Blaine. I want forever with you. When I look at you, I see my future, my love, my family, my life, everything Blaine. No matter what, you and I will always be us."

Blaine looks happy for once. I think I finally got through to him. "I really want that Kurt. I want you forever. I just don't know how…."

"And we will be. It won't be easy. No matter where I go next year, it won't be easy, but I know we have something special. We'll always be special. As long as we both know that, we can make this work."

"Okay." He seemed happy, but worried and that was the best I could ask for right now. There too many if's floating around in the air to resolve anything else right now. There would be more to tackle when I knew where I'd be going to school, but for now, he knows how I feel and I'm going to spend every minute making sure that my dreams for a forever with Blaine come true.

"Okay?" He nodded with a smile. "Now can we have an unscheduled make out session?" I winked because the best part of all of this is that I know I can share myself completely with him. He's the only one I ever want to share myself with. "You're the only one that I ever want to be with."