Halloween 2013

Blaine scanned the NYADA-Prep lunchroom and spotted his new group of friends, waving to him from the far end of the cafeteria.  He smiled back and headed their way.  

He'd been a little worried about starting yet another new school, this time as a transfer student and sophomore, and at first it had been yet another culture shock.  Going from McKinley to Dalton to NYADA-Prep in the space of a year was a bit of an adjustment, but in some ways, NYADA-Prep was the best fit of them all.  Everyone here was a performer like he was, there were more LGBTQ kids here than not, and he felt like finally, he could really be himself completely in school.  

He set his tray down in the spot saved for him, and looked around at the group.  Harmony, whose big voice and even bigger stage presence rivaled his sister's; Gavroche, who reminded him a little bit of Kurt; Unique, a trans woman who had made a huge splash in the show choir world last year; and Eli.  Sweet, cute Eli, who he had fooled around with a few times and liked, but … well, Kurt was always first in his heart and in his mind, perfect, unattainable Kurt, and Blaine specifically kept things strictly casual with Eli.  Eli understood, and was willing to be friends with benefits only.

“So you coming with us tonight, Blaine?” Eli asked, nudging him with his shoulder.  

Harmony broke in, “Or is your sister making you go trick-or-treating out in Brooklyn while it's still light out?”

“She actually said I could go to the NYADA-Prep costume party tonight.  My friend Kurt made me an amazing costume, but I forgot it in my room this morning like an idiot.”  Kurt had made him so many costumes, always exactly what Blaine wanted.  He thought back to the first Halloween he had with Rachel and their dads, and Kurt.  

“I don't want to go out trick-or-treating,” Blaine whispered.  He looked up at his dads, dressed up in fancy costumes as Tin Man and Cowardly Lion from The Wizard of Oz.  Rachel was Dorothy in every detail, from the neatly braided hair down to the ruby slippers.  Kurt was in on the game, dressed up as the Scarecrow.  Cooper was out at a friend's, declaring himself too old for trick-or-treating.  The room was strewn with fabric and makeup and the huge costume chest containing all their various performance outfits and halloween and play costumes.

Blaine looked at himself in the mirror.  He was wearing a full-body Toto costume with an attached furry hood with terrier ears framing his face, and Rachel had even painted his face to resemble the tiny dog, and had attached a leash to the collar of the costume to lead him by.

“But, Blaine, we're all ready to go, and we have to finish by seven, so we can make it to the town costume parade and contest!” Hiram pleaded, kneeling down and peering at him anxiously.  “Why don't you want to go, sweetheart?”

“I … I don't know, but I don't, Daddy!”  Blaine curled up in a furry ball on the floor.

Kurt spoke from the corner where he was putting the final touches on his own Scarecrow costume.  “I think I know,” he said.  “I think it's something I can relate to, if you know what I mean.  Maybe we should have  a little talk?”

Hiram and LeRoy looked at each other, then nodded and kissed Blaine on the top of his head, before leaving the living room and heading for the kitchen, bringing Rachel with them.  

“So …. this is the first time you've gone trick-or-treating since … since your parents passed away, isn't it, Blaine?” Kurt asked, sitting down next to a despondent Blaine and petting his back.  “I know how that can be.  You know, my mom died two years ago.  It felt … wrong, at first, going on and doing something we used to do together without her.  But … your parents would want you to have fun.  You don't need to feel guilty or bad about it.”

Blaine shook his head silently.

“I miss my mommy and daddy all the time, but that's not why I don't wanna go.”

“I don't understand, buddy.  What's the problem?”

Blaine rolled up and looked back in the full length mirror.  “I hate this costume.  It's … it's a baby costume!  It's size 3T and I'm five!”

“But … Blaine … it fits you perfectly …”

Being the smallest kid in the class, Blaine was well aware that he could still fit into a 3T and it was a sore spot.  He scowled.

“I know, but … I don't want to wear toddler costumes anymore!  I'm a kindergartner! This is a baby costume and it … it has a hood!  I look like baby in it.  And it's not scary!”

Kurt nodded.  He didn't laugh, or smile, or make fun.  He never did, unlike Cooper or even Rachel sometimes.  He loved that about Kurt.

“I get what you're saying.  But why not just tell your dads you want to wear something else?”

Blaine looked at his furry paws.  “Because … I have to be Wizard of Oz or we can't be in the family costume competition.  Daddy said it's our ‘theme'.”

“Well, as the Scarecrow I'm going to put my brains on this.  You don't want a baby costume and you want to be scary, but it needs to be Wizard of Oz … I have an idea, but you don't have to do it if you don't want to.”  He pulled out the coffee table book about The Wizard of Oz and opened it up.  “Come here and look at this.  What if I made you look like this?”

Blaine had padded over and looked at the page Kurt had shown him.  He squealed in horror and delight.   “Yes!  Yes, yes yes, Kurt, that!!”  He hugged Kurt tightly.

“Okay, stop jumping so much!” Kurt said, chuckling.  Kurt was the most amazing boy in the world, Blaine was sure as he watched Kurt trim the fur of his baby dog costume quickly, then grab different pieces of costumes from the costume box -- a feathery pair of wings, a vest, a small fez, a ‘tail' made from a square of black felt -- and fashion them into a brand new costume right on Blaine's body.

“How - - how do you do that?” he'd breathed.

“Magic!  Halloween magic,” Kurt answered, wiping most of the makeup off Blaine's face and focusing on him carefully as he drew a new design in its place.  “There!”

“How we doing in here, boys?” His dads came in cautiously, with an impatient Rachel behind them.  Blaine had been transfixed by his grotesque, terrifying  image in the mirror, but he was so thrilled to show his daddies his scary costume, he whirled with a high pitched screech and spread his little black wings.  Running at full tilt and leaping on the back of his couch, he squawked at full volume, “I'm a flying monkey!!  I'm gonna get you, Dorothy!!!!”

No, it wouldn't be Halloween without one of Kurt's costumes and … “I think I'll just go back home after all, put on my costume, and give out candy to the trick-or-treaters.”

“Absolutely not!   Unique is here, never fear.  I'll whip something fabulous up for you.  But the NYADA-Prep costume party?”  She tossed her hair for emphasis.  “Uh-uh, honey.  We're crashing the NYADA costume party.”

“Okay, I'll bite.  Why would we do that instead of going to our own school's party?” Blaine asked.

“Hell-lo, earth to Blaine?  College boys, what else?” Harmony said, as the others nodded.  

“Hell-lo, my sister and Kurt go to that school,” Blaine reminded them.  “They'll kill me if I crash a college party.”

“It's a masquerade party, remember?  We'll just disguise ourselves.”  

Blaine looked glumly down at his cafeteria pizza.  He'd been looking forward to a rare evening out with his own friends, without having to look at Kurt and Adam together.  He knew they were going as Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson.  Brody and Rachel were going too, as Tarzan and Jane. He decided he hated couples costumes.   “I don't see how I can get away with it,” he tried to beg off.

“You'll see, sweetheart.  I'll fix it so nobody, not even your own sister, will recognize you,” Unique said, talking over him.  The others clamored for him to agree and he finally got a little intrigued at the prospect of fooling his sister and friends, and gave in.

~ * ~

The great hall, where he had watched, rapt, as Kurt sang a solo for the Early Fall Recitation, was dimmed, lit here and there with flickering candles against sparkly cobwebs, artificial fog creeping along the floor.  Blaine nervously tugged at his mask.  He and Unique had ransacked the stores and made this amazing find.  It was an authentic Venetian masquerade costume, with a hat and mask that covered most of his face.  It was so elaborate that he had worried that it would be out of place at a college party, but here at NYADA, the more dramatic, the better, it seemed.  Many of them looked as if they were ‘borrowed' from the off-Broadway productions most of the students appeared in as extras and chorus parts.  Blaine caught his breath at the sight of Kurt across the room, wearing an elegant Edwardian ensemble as Dr. Watson.  He was so beautiful.

Standing beside him dressed as a vampire, Eli's eyes followed his gaze and rested on Kurt.  “You want to dance?” he tried, and Blaine looked down sadly.  

“Blaine … he's never going to be with you,” Eli said, not unkindly.  “You should try to have fun and forget about him.”

“I know,” Blaine whispered.  The music changed to a slow dance, and he took Eli's hand and determinedly marched him to the dance floor.  When Eli slipped an arm around his waist and pulled him close, he leaned against Eli's shoulder, breathing in his aftershave, trying to lose himself in the feeling of a boy's arms.  But his eyes couldn't stay away from Kurt, still talking with Adam.  He wondered if Adam knew how lucky he was.  A few times he jumped, seeing Kurt's eyes lingering on him … with admiration.

The music ended and he stepped back slightly from Eli, when he noticed that Kurt and Adam were arguing nearby.  He caught some of their words … Adam snappishly saying that Kurt was more interested in his roommates' lives than in his, Kurt stammering some kind of half-denial.  Then … Adam storming out  the exit, petulantly and Kurt following.  

“Excuse me, Eli,” Blaine whispered.  Eli nodded with a resigned expression, and Blaine hurried out into the hallway.  He was just in time to hear Adam say, “Well, maybe we need a break, Kurt.”

“Okay … we can talk about this tomorrow, then… you're right, we need a break from this conversation - -”

“I meant a break from us, Kurt,” Adam said.  Kurt looked as if he'd been slapped, and Blaine's heart ached for him, even if it was true he hated the thought of Kurt with someone else.  He stood in the shadows while Adam backed away and down the hall, leaving wonderful, perfect Kurt standing there alone, staring after him.  

Blaine wanted to go to Kurt and comfort him, but … he wasn't supposed to be here … he would get in trouble if his sister found out … he wavered uncertainly, and Kurt started back toward the dance, passing by him.  Blaine's heart jumped as it always did when Kurt was near… and he followed, without thinking, back into the ballroom.

Kurt wandered over to the windows, sitting down and gazing out.  He looked utterly humiliated.  Blaine couldn't bear that.  Hesitating only a second more, he headed over to the refreshments table and got two cups of punch.  He carried them over to Kurt, and as he reached him, felt his heart bursting with love when Kurt gazed up at him with stormy, gray-blue eyes.  He couldn't form words, but simply handed Kurt one of the cups.  Staring up for a moment, with a quizzical expression, Kurt nodded and smiled sweetly, and then took the cup, gesturing next to him.

Blaine sat down and looked out the window onto the street below along with Kurt.  They sat in companionable silence for a space.  Blaine was tingling with attraction to his precious, beloved Kurt, and his fingers trembled slightly around the cup until he put it down on the windowsill.  Kurt smiled a little … and reached out to put his hand over Blaine's.  Blaine felt as if he was in a dream, holding hands with Kurt in this romantic setting.  He tried to find a way to say something, but he was oddly tongue-tied for the first time with Kurt in a long time.  He felt like they were strangers falling in love… as if he hadn't loved Kurt since at age five, he had seen him for the very first time.

“So … here alone?” Kurt asked, taking a sip of punch and squeezing his hand.

Blaine nodded dumbly.

“Me too.  I suppose you heard me getting dumped.”

Blaine nodded again.

Kurt put the cup down on the windowsill and stared out for a while, as Blaine admired his handsome profile helplessly.  He loved this man so desperately.  He could watch him all night and be happy for the privilege.  Oh, Kurt, why can't I be old enough?  Why can't you feel even a little of what I feel for you?

Kurt moved impatiently in his seat.  “Enough.  He wants a break, he can have one.  It's a beautiful night, this is a beautiful song … and I'm talking to a beautiful stranger,” Kurt finished, looking admiringly at Blaine's costume and peering at his mask. Blaine was grateful that his eyes and most of his upper face and hair were covered, and that it was so dimly lit in here.   “That's an amazing costume.  I'm very interested in costume design and fashion.  Where'd you get it?”

Blaine panicked.  If he spoke, Kurt would recognize his voice, he was sure … he would get sent home soon after and grounded.   Without thinking it through first, he stood up and extended a hand to Kurt, inclining his head slightly in invitation toward the dance floor.  Kurt blushed rosily and nodded, taking his hand and following Blaine through the crowd.

They danced, one dance after another, for the next hour, then the next.   Blaine was having the most romantic, wonderful time of his life.  Even though it meant absolutely nothing, he was here in this beautiful ballroom with Kurt, dancing with Kurt, who seemed completely enchanted by him, or by his mysterious persona, at least.  The music slowed and Kurt pulled him close, slipping an arm around his waist and hooking his chin over Blaine's shoulder.  They swayed together and Blaine felt his heart racing as Kurt's hand stroked his back.  Blaine saw Unique, in her costume as a Vegas showgirl, giving him an excited thumbs-up, and he gulped slightly.

“You're a wonderful dancer.  We dance so well together, don't you think?” Kurt murmured in Blaine's ear, and Blaine thrilled to Kurt's voice, his breath tickling his neck.  Breathless, he nodded in response and laid his cheek against Kurt's dreamily.  Just a little longer.  

“It's so strange.  I don't even know your name yet, but …” Kurt's sweet voice whispered against his ear.  “I'd like to kiss you.”

Blaine's heart was pounding so fast that he thought it would explode.  He was trembling with want … but … he looked into Kurt's trusting eyes.  

No.  

Not this way … not like this.  Not when Kurt didn't know who he was.  Instead, he smiled and took Kurt's hand in his, pressing his lips to it gallantly as he could, and then held it to his heart.  Looking over Kurt's shoulder, he saw Adam sheepishly entering the ballroom.  Relinquishing the fantasy, he stepped away from Kurt.  

“Wait!  I don't even know your name,” Kurt protested, but Blaine just shook his head and pointed silently toward Adam.

Kurt turned and saw Adam … and to Blaine's surprise … he didn't look that excited about it.  But just the same, he sighed and looked back a final time at Blaine.

“Thank you for the dance, Prince Charming,” he smiled, and Blaine died a thousand deaths of happiness in an instant.  Kurt went back to Adam, and things were back the way they had been, his own friends clustering around him and chattering, and Eli slipping a sympathetic hand into his … and Adam and Kurt embracing and apologizing.  

But he had been Kurt's romantic prince or a short while … and he would treasure the memory forever.