Blaine had worked on his speech during his flight to New York. He had written everything over and over again, only to sigh loudly and cross what he just wrote to start over again. He knew that he could easily start to ramble or lose his words so writing everything down was his way to make sure he wouldn't forget something important. He clutched the little piece of paper tightly, making his way to Kurt's place. It had been a month since the wedding and Kurt and he texted all the time, sometimes sending flirty texts and some other times just random silly things.

First, Blaine stopped at the nearest florist and bought a bouquet of roses, 21 flowers to be exact, because you don't buy a even number of flowers. He walked from the florist to Kurt's building, the walk only making Blaine's stress grow bigger as he felt his palm get sweaty. He jogged all his way to Kurt's front door and knocked loudly before hearing someone coming to open the door.

It wasn't Kurt nor was it Rachel or Santana.

"Hello, how can I help you?" The man in front of Blaine asked with a heavy English accent. He was tall, taller than Blaine and probably Kurt, a big warm smile on his face as he waited patiently for Blaine to answer.

"Oh, I'm sorry, this must be the wrong flat. I'm looking for Kurt."

"This is the right flat; he is in the bathroom at the moment. I'm his boyfriend, Adam," Blaine's smile faltered as his heart constricted heavily in chest. This couldn't be true. Cold panic came in waves as Blaine tried his best to keep his composure. He felt so stupid. Here he was, standing with his bouquet and some ridiculous words written on a paper, hoping to get Kurt back. Only to find out that the man definitely had moved on. He felt utterly ashamed of himself; he was devastated and angry that he dared to hope.

"I...." Blaine eyes fluttered between his bouquet and Adam, not knowing what to say.

"You must be Blaine, right?" Adam gently provided. Blaine anger grew, he was not only angry at himself but at the man in front of him. He was angry because obviously he seemed like a very nice guy, trying to help him out when Blaine wanted nothing more than to find out that he was an asshole and hate the guy's guts. But no, he had to be nice and helpful. And just because of that Blaine had to be angry at him.

"Can I talk to him?" Adam nodded and went to find Kurt. Blaine stepped in and put the flowers down on the table, waiting for Kurt to appear. When the brunette entered the room Blaine quickly but gently pushed Kurt outside, so they could talk without being in the same room as Adam.

"Blaine, hi. What are you doing here?"

"How could you, Kurt?"

Immediately a deep frown appeared on Kurt's face. "What are you talking about?"

"So he is your boyfriend now? Did Valentine's Day meant nothing to you?" Blaine asked angrily.

"It was clear from the beginning, Blaine. Yes, we fooled around during the non-wedding but it didn't mean –"

"I won't let you say that, because we both know that it meant more than casual sex between two exes. It meant more and right away you run into his arms? Why would you do something like that?" Blaine spat, trying to hurt Kurt as much as he was hurting. It was very immature and oh so far from what he had planned to say, but he couldn't help the turmoil that was running thought his body.

"Don't you dare try to make me feel guilty about being with another man, Blaine. Don't you ever dare! I didn't run into his arms and what we did at the wedding was casual sex between exes. I'm sorry if you got hurt but it was very clear since the beginning," Kurt answered, pointing at Blaine, fury in his eyes and violence in his tone.

"You had to run to him, seriously? Don't you see that he is the perfect polar opposite of –"

"Shut up, Blaine! Just shut up! You don't have a word to say about whom I'm dating; you don't have a word to say about when or how I start a new relationship. You had your chance and you monstrously blew it! I'm gonna have to ask you to leave."

Blaine stepped back, still tightly clutching the paper with scribbled note on. He held on it like a lifeline because he knew that now, at any moment he was going to break down. Blaine took a deep breath and extended his hand to Kurt.

"Read this, whenever you have a moment," Blaine waited for Kurt to take the paper and the moment he did, Blaine took the stairs and disappeared.

When Kurt went back to the apartment he put the note in a box he had labeled 'Blaine', without reading it. And forgot about it.

It couldn't have been more than two weeks later, Kurt was sitting in a little diner with Adam, stealing fries and glancing at each other. It was noon and they were both hungry because of a heavy dance rehearsal. Suddenly Kurt's phone went off and Blaine's face appeared, signaling him that the man was trying to call him. Kurt sent him directly to voicemail, looking back at Adam.

"You could've answered, you know. I'm not gonna get mad. I know you two were pretty close and that when you two broke you also lost your best friend," the blonde said, taking gently Kurt's hand in his own and giving a reassuring squeeze. Kurt eyes dropped to their intertwined hands and his phone. He didn't mean not to answer Blaine's call. He was actually relieved that the man had called him. He hated it, going days without any news from him, without random and silly text messages. Trying to get over him had been proven difficult when Blaine and he had been constantly texting, but the past two weeks without any news had helped Kurt a little. At least he thought so until the butterflies in his stomach woke up just because of a phone call. One more time Kurt's phone went off, telling him that Blaine had left a message.

"Do you want to listen to this?" Adam asked sweetly. Kurt shook his head no and glanced back to his phone. He didn't want to listen to anything that Blaine had to say to him in a smelly diner. He wanted to wait to be at home to listen to the message and answer with all the care and attentiveness that Blaine deserved.

"No, I'm good."

Kurt ate faster than he normally would and excused himself quickly to get back to his place. Once he got there he let a relieved breath as he found out was alone. Rachel must have been in class and Santana was probably scaring elderly people. He sat down on his couch and after taking his boots off, opened his phone and nervously listened to the voicemail.

"Kurt," Kurt's body froze immediately, something was wrong, something was very wrong. Something in Blaine's voice wasn't right, it was not only that he was whispering but his voice reflected how deep and horrible what was happening was. "Kurt, I'm... I sorry, I don't know how much time I have, I don't know where he is or... But I wanted you to know that I love you. Since the moment you stopped me on the staircase at Dalton, it's only been you," Kurt let out a little sob at the words. They were ushered and Kurt didn't understand what was going on, why would Blaine feel the need to tell him this over the phone, why didn't he have time? He heard muffled noised on the other end of the line, then screams. Loud and piercing screams.

"I... Kurt, I was so afraid I wouldn't have time to tell you this one more time. But I love you. I love you, Kurt and ..." Kurt's hand was over his mouth as he let his tears run freely over his cheeks, something was happening, something so scary that Blaine felt the need to call him and leave him a message. "Oh shit, he's here... Kurt, just please remember, I've always loved you and only you. I lov..." Kurt looked at his phone as the woman's voice asked him if he wanted to call back the person or listen to the message again. At the end of the message, it was clear, oh so clear. Kurt had heard a gunshot.

Urgently Kurt called Blaine, only to go directly to his voicemail. He tried frantically to call over and over again.

"Answer your phone, Blaine. This isn't funny, you moron. Just answer the damn phone," Kurt repeated multiple times as he tried again to reach Blaine. He couldn't see clear because of the tears in his eyes and his hands were shaking so badly that he could barely hold his phone when the front door opened loudly and Santana rushed into the living room.

"Turn the TV on, Hummel. Quick!" the woman shoved her coat on a chair and rudely took the remote from Kurt's hands. She turned the TV to the news channel.

McKinley was all over their TV. Filmed from above, from the front – police and firefighters everywhere. Kurt couldn't make out what the speaker was saying, all he could focus on was the big headline: Shooting at Lima's high school.

"No!" Kurt screamed, as he urgently grabbed his phone again and tried to call Blaine, going straight to the voicemail.

Santana sat there, in a silent horror. She reached out to Kurt, who was sobbing beside her. The man hid his face into her neck, crying and hearing over and over again Blaine's muffled words: I love you. It was Blaine's way of saying goodbye to him. And then he remembered something. Blaine said that he was here. As in...

"Who's the shooter?" Kurt's head snapped back to the screen, still holding tightly to Santana.

"We don't know his identity for sure, but we do know it's a man, who apparently used to go to McKinley. Have you –" when Kurt shook his head no the Latina only tighten her grip around the man.

Hours passed of no news except that some students had been able to get out of the school. But nobody knew where the shooter was within the school and so no one risked moving. It had also been hours since Kurt listened to the voicemail. He wasn't crying anymore, he wasn't saying anything or moving. He was just holding onto anything, any little spark of hope would do. He just wanted one small miracle. He prayed to God he didn't believe in to just give him this. To give him Blaine back.

He had his phone in one hand and the little note that Blaine gave to him weeks ago. Reading it had been horrible. Blaine's handwriting was so beautiful and charming, Blaine's words were perfect but they were so bitter when Kurt read them. He wanted to hear them from Blaine, he wanted to see his eyes light up because he had found a new song they could sing together, he wanted to hear Blaine's voice in the morning when he was still grumpy, he wanted to feel Blaine's hand in his. He was so not over him and he would never be. It was unfair that now that it was clear, Kurt might lose him.

Kurt passed out at some point from exhaustion and panic. Tears had tired him and once all the frantic panic of the discovery had lessened a little Kurt fell into asleep. Phone still in hand, ringtone at the maximum level. That's why he almost fell from the couch when his phone went off.

"Blaine?" Kurt asked desperately. All he heard was a heavy sigh.

"No, it's Adam. Is everything alright?" Kurt shoulder slumped down. He tried to calm his heart that was ponding loudly in his chest because of the brutal wake up and the hope.

"No, Adam. There's been a shooting at my old high school."

"I know, I've seen it on TV. How are you friends?"

"I don't know, I don't where Blaine is, I don't know if he is okay, I should've answered that phone call, Adam. Instead I was busy eating fries!" Kurt shouted.

"Hey, none of this is your fault, you couldn't know. Do you need anything?"

"No, I'm... I'm gonna be okay," Kurt said between two sobs.

"Do you want me to come over?"

Kurt shook his head before remembering that he was on the phone. "No, I have Santana and Rachel. I'm ....I'm good."

"Okay, alright.... Kurt, I think we need to talk."

"About what?" Kurt was half listening to the man, half watching the TV so he didn't really heard at first.

".....still in love with him. It was just a matter of time before you found out by yourself. "

"Wait what?" Kurt heard a loud sigh at the other end of the phone and Adam repeated.

"I wanted to talk about it for a while now, since February, to be honest. Kurt, you're still in love with Blaine. And your reaction today is just another hint that you never really stopped. I really liked all the little moments we spent together but .... I deserve better than to be with someone who will think about his ex whenever he is with me. You deserve better too, Kurt."

"I... How did you... Oh god, I'm so sorry, so sorry, Adam."

"It's alright. Well, it's not but it will be eventually. I... I better go. Just call me if anything happens, alright?"

"Of course."

They hung up and only then Kurt noticed Santana and Rachel curled up in a chair, eyes red and hanging on tightly to each other.

Immediately Kurt's mind went to Blaine, and then his brother. Oh god, Finn! With all of this he had forgotten about his brother now being a teacher at Mckinley.

"How is Finn? Does anyone have news about Finn? Rachel?" Kurt pressed urgently, searching for his brother number.

"He is fine, Kurt. I talked to him an hour ago. He wasn't at school when everything started. He is okay," Rachel reassured him, her voice thick with concern.

She informed him that they had news about Tina, Brittany and some of the new Glee members. They were out of the school. They were shaken and traumatised but they weren't injured. They had no news about Blaine and Artie though.

They waited, and waited. After hours a policemen finally got the shooter and people rushed into the school to help the students and teachers that were still inside. Kurt looked frantically at the screen, hoping, praying to see dark gelled hair, or a bowtie, anything really. He just wanted to know that Blaine was alive. It didn't happen though. Kurt didn't see anything and none of their phones went off.

Kurt stayed on the couch until late within the night. The TV was turned off long ago and the girls were sleeping, tired after the scare. Kurt was frozen on the couch. He hadn't moved when the TV channel started to talk about something else, he hadn't moved when the girls offered him something to eat, he hadn't moved when they went to sleep. He hadn't moved. He couldn't. He still had no news of Blaine but he was waiting. He knew that at any moment his phone would just go off and Blaine's beautiful face would appear on the screen and then he could hear his warm voice. Any minute now. So Kurt waited. But nothing happened.

He woke up with a startle when Santana roughly pushed him back up.

"Sit up, Hummel, and log onto skype," Kurt watched her like she had grown another head. "For fucking sake Hummel, just do it! Move!"

Kurt logged in and instantly someone called him. He accepted the call and Blaine's face took over his screen. He looked tired and his hair weren't gelled. One of his shoulders was wrapped in bandages and Kurt could definitely see that he was in a hospital. But he was here, he was alive and he was smiling. Kurt started to cry out of happiness, letting the tears wash all the worry and fear out of his body.

"Hi, Kurt."