Sitting here, all alone

Watching the snow fall

Looking back at the days

We threw them snow balls

I can't believe

I'm putting the tree up by myself

I need you

And nobody else

Blaine tried his best not to laugh as he hid behind the neatly trimmed bushes infront of his house while he watched Kurt look around for him. He took a thick handfull of powdered snow in his hand and made it into as well of a shaped ball as he could and threw it around the corner of the bush. He got no response. When he stood he was welcomed by a ball of snow to the face. Kurt giggled and stood waiting for Blaine's response. 

"You are so gone!" Blaine laughed and ran towards the older boy and jumped into him, resulting both of them falling backwards into the snow. Blaine looked down at Kurt who was staring directly at his lips. Blaine leaned in and pressed their cold lips together and warmed both of them. 

"Blaine." Marley waved her hand infront of Blaine's face. "You okay?"

"Yeah..I'm fine." Blaine rubbed his eyes to get rid of the few tears that he was sure were there. 

"Okay.." Marley smiled at him wearily. "You just kinda zoned." 

Blaine tried his best to give her a small smile back. He'd promised her and the rest of the New Directions that he would stop beating himself up over all of this. He told Sam that he would fight to get Kurt back and make things right, but he wouldn't let this bring him down any more than it already had. 

And I'm sorry

If I pushed you away

Cause I need you here

And I want for you to know

But now it was christmas time. This was always Blaine's favorite time of the year. Especially the year before when he had Kurt. And only a year after that, he felt like he had absolutely nothing. 

And I don't care, if I don't get anything

All I need is you here right now

And I'm sorry if I hurt you

But I know that all I want is you

This christmas, this christmas, this christmas

All I want is you

This christmas 

This christmas

This christmas 

All I want is you this christmas

Blaine sat on the floor infront of the christmas tree watching Kurt put the final few orniments on the top of the tree, a.k.a the part of the tree that Blaine couldn't reach. 

He stared at the boy infront of him, smiling at the way his face glowed with the light of the fireplace that was lit only a few feet away. The way the grey sweater he was wearing rode up when he stood on his tip toes putting the last of the decorations on the tree. 

Blaine sighed simply in contentment and smiled. Kurt sat down on the floor looking up at the tree, much like  a small child. 

"It looks good." Blaine wrapped his arm around Kurt, pulling them both down so that they were both laying on the floor looking partially up at the ceiling and partially looking at the decorated tree. 

The younger boy leaned over and kissed Kurt on the cheek, he still felt Kurt's cheek warm like it did the first time they kissed. 

"I love Christmas time." Kurt smiled a little. 

"I like it better with you." Blaine practically whispered, taking his hand and running it through the counter-tenor's hair. 

He awoke to the the lights on his Christmas tree in his family's living room. He sat up, the lights seeming brighter than the sun. He looked around the room until he caught the light on the clock on the wall that read '3:45 A.M'.  He sighed and ran his hand through his un-gelled hair. He layed back down and stared back up at the ceiling hoping that he could go back to sleep tonight and his dreams not be plagued by the memories of he and Kurt. 

And I never wanna do this alone

Baby I just need you to be here

Here through the holidays

I just wanna know if you feel same way

Because I'm lonely baby

Want you to hold me baby

Kurt sat at the kithen table, his laptop open. 

"I'm sorry dad, I just.. I don't know if I wanna come home." 

"I.." The older man sighed. "I understand. Carole and Finn are gonna be so dissapointed you're not coming home..I am too."

Kurt nodded, feeling the lump in his throat grow. Sure, he didn't want to hurt his family, but he didn't know if he could handle going back home. 

Well he'd already said it. It didn't even seem like home anymore. 

"Whatever you decided to do, I'll still make sure I can talk to you on Christmas..Love you kid." 

"Love you too dad." Kurt was the first to exit the skype conversation. He felt the tears coming down his cheeks.  He was so tired of feeling like this. Wasn't it supposed to get better? He couldn't even be happy at Christmas time. 

And I'm sorry

If I pushed you away

I just want you to know I miss you

And I want you to stay

He walked back to his bedroom and layed down on the bed. Wondering when it was ever going to stop hurting. He'd tried so hard to just talk to Blaine, and he could now make it through a conversation. He wanted to go slow with him. He wanted to feel like he could get his best friend back. But now he felt like that hurt more than anything else, because now Blaine felt like he could open up to Kurt, and Kurt wasn't sure if he could handle that. He wished things were like they were last Christmas. 

And I don't care, if I don't get anything

All I need is you here right now

And I'm sorry if I hurt you

But I know that all I want is you

This christmas, this christmas, this christmas

All I want is you

This christmas 

This christmas 

This christmas 

All I want is you this christmas

Kurt went with Rachel to the airport and politely declined her final offer to go home with her, even if it was just for a week.

He rode in a taxi on the way back to their flat, silently. Looking through the pictures on his phone of he and Blaine from last Christmas. He ran his finger over the tiny symbol that represented deleting the pictures of them and couldn't bring himself to doing it. He wanted to through the iPhone out the window. 

Wrapping gifts without you babe

Is like mid-December and there's no cold

I can't do this on my own

I've changed my ways

Keep running back and forth again

I'm here to stay

Kurt awoke on the couch to two firm knocks on the door. He'd grown up hearing that all the time. He sprung up to the door to be welcomed by his father standing behind the door. Kurt practically launched himself into the older mans arms. "Dad." He sighed into his shoulder. 

"Merry Christmas Kurt." He smiled as his son pulled away. 

As soon as his arms were unwrapped from his dad's, Kurt's eyes were locked on the boy standing behind him. 

Was he seeing things?

"I brought someone with me to see you." Burt said plainly as Blaine stood behind the older man again. 

"I-" Kurt couldn't manage to get the words out. 

"Merry Christmas Kurt." Blaine said, a small smile gracing his lips.

And I don't care, if I don't get anything

All I need is you here right now

And I'm sorry if I hurt you

But I know that all I want is you

This christmas, this christmas, this christmas

All I want is you

This christmas 

This christmas 

This christmas 

All I want is you this christmas

'Merry Christmas Kurt.' Blaine smiled in the middle of the McKinley hallway after presenting Kurt with his Christmas gift. 

'The first of many." The brunette promised. 

Blaine looked down at Kurt who had his head in his lap. They finally got to talk things out. And things weren't picture perfect. But both Kurt and Blaine knew it needed to be done. The tear tracks were still on Kurt's cheeks. Blaine's eyes still stung from crying. Sure, the last year had been rough. But they promised that last year's Christmas was the first of many, and he intended on never breaking that promise.