Blaine was so hard it fucking hurt. His thumb roamed over Kurt's name on his phone, wondering if now would be the time to..

Groaning in frustration, Blaine threw his phone on his bed, deciding to take matters into his own hands.

It wasn't that he didn't want to have sex with his boyfriend. Oh no, that definitely wasn't the case. It was just the fact that things had been so strained between the two of them lately. Blaine was happy for Kurt. He was happy because Kurt had a future, and Kurt deserved to be on Broadway or to be.. well, wherever Kurt wanted to be. In New York. He was just frustrated because he wouldn't be there with him.

Grabbing his bottle of lotion, Blaine realized he might need to buy another bottle before the month was out if he and Kurt kept this up.

God, was this normal? This really could not be normal. Blaine was well enough educated in sex to know that a white male's genitals did not just start getting darker as he went into adulthood. But Blaine hadn't even had sex in a month, so this couldn't be some sort of STD. What if the lack of sex was making his penis darken? That didn't make sense at all.

Blaine just didn't know what to do. It only seemed to be getting.. darker. As if it was a tan. He had tried washing it off, and part of him thought it worked a little, but it wasn't the most comfortable experience.

Asking someone would be traumatizing for all parties involved. How would one go about asking it anyway? Blaine shook his head, opening his laptop and consulting google. He always had gone for the information himself. 

Blaine sincerely hoped no one went through his browser history, as it was currently:

Katy Perry-Last Friday Night Music Video

Burt Reynolds

Bowties on sale

What to do if your penis is getting darker

At least he'd found some bowties.

“It's going to be amazing, Blaine! That is, if I get in. Really, my voice is impeccable. It's all down to my outfit choice. If I wear one wrong thing, my chances are ruined. Rachel wanted to wear one of her reindeer sweaters, but I told her.. Blaine? Are you listening to me?”

“Of course I am! I've just.. had a lot on my mind." Blaine smiled weakly. It didn't reach his eyes.

Truth was, he had been thinking. A lot. And not just about his 'dark' problem. 

"Care to share?" Kurt lifted an elegant eyebrow, his pale face looking slightly annoyed and concerned. 

"Has your dick ever gotten, you know, darker?” Blaine didn't know what made him say it. Really, he didn't. He was a freak of nature, and Kurt was excited about New York and-

“Wait.. what?”

Blaine cleared his throat. “I mean.. Never mind. It's nothing. I think I have some weird skin disease, but it's only on my hands and well.. that. They're just.. tan.”

The only sounds for the next ten minutes were Kurt's ringing laughter and Blaine's flustered explanations.