March 3, 2012, 5:40 p.m.
Quality Time
Kurt and Blaine take their daugher shopping for her very first bra. And Blaine has come prepared.
K - Words: 681 - Last Updated: Mar 03, 2012 2,312 0 10 9 Categories: Humor, Characters: Blaine Anderson, Kurt Hummel, OC, Tags: established relationship, futurefic,
Quality Time
Kurt sighed and looked around uncomfortably. "People are going to think we're perverts, Blaine."
Blaine rolled his eyes. "Kurt, could we be any gayer? Come on. It's fine. I know what I'm doing."
The confidence in Blaine's voice did not make Kurt feel better. He and Audrey exchanged nervous looks.
"Come on, the junior department is this way," Blaine announced, striding purposefully ahead of the other two.
"Dad, do we really have to do this?" Audrey whispered harshly to Kurt. The fact that she was on the brink of absolute mortification was evident in her voice. "Why couldn't Grandma or aunt Rachel take me instead?"
"Because it's important that we embrace these changes in your life together," Blaine said cheerfully, pausing to let his husband and daughter catch up. He wrapped an arm around Audrey's shoulders and gave her a gentle squeeze. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about, sweetheart. You're becoming a woman and it's a beautiful and natural part of life. We're really here to celebrate this with you, right Kurt?"
"Don't look at me, you'll be paying for the years of therapy in which this day will inevitably result."
Blaine frowned at him. "Kurt…"
Kurt rolled his eyes and heaved a sigh. "Your pops is right, Audrey. We're both very proud of you."
"For growing boobs?" Audrey nearly shrieked, her eyes darting around wildly. "Who the hell is proud of their kid for that?"
"language," Kurt and Blaine said almost simultaneously.
"You two are the weirdest parents in the world," Audrey muttered as she jerked herself out of Blaine's grasp. Blaine shook his head and then smiled when he felt Kurt's hand slip into his.
"Look, can't you guys go look at ties or something? I really don't need you to-"
"Excuse me, miss, my daughter is looking for a bra," Blaine announced, his voice hearty and just a little too loud.
Kurt and Audrey both froze in horror. The saleswoman in front of them gave Audrey a sympathetic smile.
"I don't know if she's ready to be measured for a cup size yet, I think right now the concern is more tenderness in the breast tissue, right Aud?" Blaine continued comfortably. "I believe Maidenform makes a training bra with extra cushioning in the-"
"Kill me," Audrey whispered. Kurt had released Blaine's hand and was starting to back away slightly.
"Sir," the saleswoman said gently. Her name tag read Jillian. "Why don't you let us go look at a few options?"
"Great," Blaine answered with enthusiasm, and began to follow along when Jillian ushered Audrey further into the maze of undergarments.
"Blaine." Kurt folded his arms across his chest and glared at him. Blaine looked at him for a moment before he sighed and walked toward Kurt rather than following his daughter.
"Too far?" he asked sheepishly.
"Miles," Kurt replied.
"I just…I remember when my body started going through all those changes, and I was just so confused and ashamed, and I didn't want her to feel that way about herself. Nobody told me that it was okay, or that it was natural. I just…" Blaine looked up to meet Kurt's eyes, looking like a kicked puppy. "I really screwed this up, didn't I?"
"Sweetie, no," Kurt said gently, rubbing Blaine's back. "Well, yes, actually, but she'll only suffer temporarily. It will end up being just one more thing for her to bond with Rachel over. And when she's older it will be just another story about her ridiculous yet fabulous childhood."
"You really think so?" Blaine asked hopefully.
"Of course. I'm sure I've told you about the time my father took me to buy my first – and, might I add – only jock strap."
Blaine snorted. "Touche. Do you think I should go apologize?"
"No, Blaine, I think that we should stop lurking in the junior miss bra section before someone calls the police. I'll just text Audrey and tell her we're looking at ties."
Blaine gave Kurt a half-smile and allowed him to lead the way.
He wondered if he should re-think the Miracle of Menstruation surprise party he had planned for the next milestone in his daughter's life.
He smiled to himself and shook his head. Nah. After all, who doesn't love a party?
Comments
They have a daughter. And Blaine is hilarious. And I love it.
this is absolutly adorable! i love blaine, he's sooooo stupid! :)
ahahahahahahahahaha omg The Miracle of Menstruation party. i am dying of laughter. i can totally see Blaine trying to pul that. I can't, Chazzam, I just can't.
oh god i love this! i can actually imagine Blaine doing this which is something that really worries me about my otp's nutty future xD Bravo
Oh Blainey why couldn't you have been my embaressing dad?
You have to write one about the party lol.
I am honored to share the name of the saleswoman. She was very tactful. Great story! I love your depiction of Blaine as an overhelpful father, I totally picture this happening.
OH MY SWEET JESUS THIS IS AMAZING. I seriously loved the end. Genius.
The ending. OMG xD
So hilarious!!!Now I wanna know about THAT party XDDDDDDDDDDDDD