The air around them is still hot and buzzed with labored breathing, mixed with the scent of teenage sweat and sex. It’s a smell that Kurt had become accustomed to, before their month-long dry spell, of course. But that doesn’t matter. Blaine’s head is pillowed on Kurt’s chest and Blaine’s sheets are almost too damp to be comfortable, but Kurt feels like he’s where he belongs.

Right here. With Blaine.

“What was he like?”

Kurt almost jerks in surprise at the sound of Blaine’s voice, not to mention the dangerous territory that his question approaches.

“What do you mean?”

“Chandler,” Blaine clarifies. “What was he like? I mean, what made him so…you know.”

The hand Kurt had been using to stroke Blaine’s hair pauses, but Blaine nuzzles into it, asking for more. Kurt really doesn’t want to talk about this. It’s over. They’ve stopped texting. He and Blaine are good. Everything’s good.

So why is Blaine even asking?

“Blaine, I don’t-”

“It’s not – I’m not trying to-”

Blaine groans, probably at himself, and props his head on Kurt’s naked chest with the help of his hands.

They’re not that much tanner, Kurt notices.

“I just wanna know,” Blaine says. “Because you obviously took a liking to him for some reason. And I can’t help but think that it was more than just the compliments and the…not-so-innocent texts.”

Kurt lifts his hand from the back of Blaine’s head to pinch the bridge of his nose in frustration.

“Can we please not-”

“I don’t want to argue,” Blaine states. “That’s not what I’m trying to do. I just – I need to understand.”

“There’s nothing else to understand,” Kurt says. “He – he was just-”

“Kurt, I wanna be everything to you,” Blaine says softly. “So it – it would help to know what I was doing wrong. Or what I wasn’t giving you. Or why you turned to him so quickly. That’s all.”

Bringing his hand away from his face, Kurt strokes his thumb over the bridge of Blaine’s nose and down to his lips, back up over Blaine’s almost-scruffy jaw and over his smooth cheek.

“I don’t want you to change who you are,” Kurt whispers. “It’s not about that. Because you were right; you changed your life for me. You gave up your blazers and your ties and you came here to be with me-”

“That was in the beginning,” Blaine reminds. “We’ve been together for a long time now. And it’s not – it’s not uncommon for two people to adapt or make small changes to make things work. Routine is great, but if we wanna be in this for the long-haul, which I do and I hope you do too, it takes work. Love comes easy. It’s the rest of life that makes it hard.”

Put like that, Kurt wishes he could roll Blaine up and pack him in a suitcase and drag the boy to New York with him. Blaine’s big, glossy doe-eyes are gazing up at Kurt with so much hope, so much love and just so much…everything.

Kurt caves.

“He was…sweet,” Kurt says awkwardly, because it really is strange to talk about another guy with your boyfriend. “Not that you’re not sweet! I just mean-”

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Blaine interrupts quickly. “Just take a deep breath. And tell me. I won’t get mad. Or offended.”

Kurt side-eyes him.

“Okay, I’ll do my best not to get mad or offended,” Blaine says through a familiar, adorable smile.

One that Kurt had missed dearly.

One that Kurt loves.

“He was sweet,” Kurt says again. “In this excitable, flirty kind of way. Just – that one time we met and in his texts, he was…sweet. Like he was genuinely excited to talk to me or text me back. It was…how I used to feel. In the beginning, with you.”

“So you did like him,” Blaine says.

It isn’t a question. But it isn’t an accusation, either.

Just confirmation.

“Not so much him, I guess,” Kurt attempts to explain. “Just…the idea?”

“The idea of someone new?” Blaine asks. “Or the idea of the excited, flirty stuff.”

“I don’t know,” Kurt sighs because he honestly doesn’t. He doesn’t want to admit any of this to Blaine either way, because he knows it hurts him and he doesn’t want to hurt Blaine. He’s never wanted to hurt Blaine.

“It happens a lot, I hear,” Blaine says, though it comes out kind of sad and that makes Kurt sad and it’s not fair. “When you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, things can sometimes feel stale and boring so you look for new stuff. New people, I mean.”

“I wasn’t looking for him, I promise.”

“I believe you,” Blaine replies gently.

He brushes a stray eyelash off Kurt’s cheek.

For some reason, the simple action cuts into Kurt’s chest, into his heart, and digs at something raw and painful. Blaine can do that; he can reach out and brush something off of Kurt’s face. He can dust at Kurt’s shoulder and straighten his bowtie. He can lick his finger and use that finger to wipe off a smudge on Kurt’s chin.

Of course, Kurt wouldn’t be too happy with that last one.

But Blaine can do it. Because they’re together and they’re comfortable and they’re in love.

“I wasn’t looking for Sebastian, either,” Blaine says.

“Yeah, well, you didn’t actively text Sebastian…those kinds of things.”

“No, I didn’t,” Blaine agrees, shrugging one of his shoulders. “But I didn’t because I didn’t need to. You obviously needed something that I wasn’t giving you.”

“I guess,” Kurt mumbles because he can’t deny that, but he doesn’t want to agree either.

“What else?” Blaine urges.

“Blaine-”

“Kurt,” Blaine echoes, though he sounds quite sassy and he’s got a tiny smile quirking the corner of his lips.

Kurt rolls his eyes, but he smiles in return. It’s hard not to.

“I don’t know,” Kurt says once more. “The compliments. The flirting. The excitement about New York. That’s it, really.”

“You know I’m excited for you, right?”

“…What?”

“I might not get to follow for another year, but I am excited for you when it comes to NYADA and New York. I was half blind and toasted to you while I was bedridden when you got your finalist letter. I am excited for you.”

“I don’t know why,” Kurt says softly. “You were right. It’s all I ever talk about now.”

“You’re starting your life,” Blaine whispers. “You’re getting out of here and you’re gonna go live your dream. I’m proud of you.”

“You’re gonna make me cry,” Kurt says miserably, shoving a hand in front of his eyes until Blaine pulls it away.

“And I’m sorry for acting the way I did,” Blaine continues. “For pulling away and just – it’s gonna be hard. It’s going to be very hard when you’re gone. Everything’s gonna change, you know? It won’t ever be like this again. Even when I finally graduate and go to New York, too, it won’t – things will be different. We won’t have coffee at the Lima Bean and we won’t go to the music store and we won’t have your dad almost walking in on us when we’re making out on your bed.”

“I think that’ll be a change for the better,” Kurt quips.

“Yeah,” Blaine nods in agreement and he’s smiling, but Kurt can see tears welling in his eyes and no, no, no, Blaine, honey, don’t cry.

Don’t cry, baby, he wants to say. But he doesn’t. Because they don’t say things like that. They don’t use little terms of endearment.

Kurt kind of wishes they did, though. Yeah, okay, Kurt’s strong and independent and he doesn’t need to belong to someone and he doesn’t need a nickname or baby or honeybear but –

It wouldn’t be so bad.

“But it’s the little things,” Blaine goes on to say. “And I’ll miss them all. It hurts to think about losing the life we created and it hurts to think that you won’t be here when I apply for colleges.”

“Like you were for me,” Kurt whispers.

Good god, it all makes sense. Everything. Everything makes sense and poor, sweet, loving Blaine. Why didn’t he say anything before?

“Damnit, why didn’t you say anything?” Kurt asks, angry inside and so very, very sad.

“Why didn’t you?” Blaine counters.

Blaine begins to cry openly, curling into Kurt’s chest and clinging to his skin like it’ll physically pain him if he lets go. Kurt pulls him up, closer, just under his chin. The air isn’t so hot now and Kurt yanks the blanket up to cover their shivering bodies. He holds Blaine, holds him as tight as he possibly can without breaking his bones. He plants kisses to the top of Blaine’s mussed hair and squeezes his little waist.

He uprooted his entire life. Blaine uprooted his entire life for Kurt. He switched schools, ditched his old friends, and dug his heels into the same school that had previously been Kurt’s hell.

Yeah, they both made mistakes. Blaine almost fell for Sebastian’s suave, experienced, almost-bad-boy persona and Kurt almost fell for Chandler’s sweet, saucy texts.

But it’s the end of an era. Life is about to change.

So maybe they panicked a little.

“Don’t forget me,” Blaine pleads through his tears. “Please, don’t forget me, Kurt, please, please.”

“I won’t,” Kurt promises, his own eyes filling with tears as well. “God, I could never forget you. I won’t, I promise. I promise.”

“You’re my – my other half and-”

And you’re my everything.

The words go unsaid between them, but Kurt still hears them. He hears them in his head and he soaks them in, tucks them away into the back of his mind and shoves them down just behind his heart so he’ll hear them and feel them when he’s away in New York.

Kurt suddenly pictures himself sitting alone in a tiny apartment on a sofa. It’s tastefully decorated, of course, but it still feels lonely. At the same time, he imagines Blaine walking into Kurt’s old bedroom at his dad’s house. The shelves and walls are empty. The memories are either with him or stored away and he sees Blaine crumble because that life is gone and Kurt didn’t even leave a footprint behind.

“I love you, Blaine,” Kurt whispers, his voice muffled with his own sob.

“I love you, too,” Blaine says. “I – I love you so much.”

“It’ll be okay,” Kurt says in an attempt to reassure them both. “We’ll – we’ll Skype, remember? And you’ll visit me and I’ll visit you. And I’ll be there when you graduate and I’ll come to all your Glee competitions. And when you get to New York, we’ll find a new coffee shop and a new music store and it’ll be okay. We’ll make it okay.”

“You – you promise?” Blaine asks, lifting his head and peering down at Kurt with swollen, red-rimmed eyes and splotchy, tear-stained cheeks.

He’s a mess. He’s a mess and he’s a wreck but Kurt has never loved Blaine more than he does in this very moment.

“I promise, baby. I swear it.”

When Blaine dives in for a kiss at Kurt's words, it’s too rough and a bit salty from all the crying they’ve been doing, but it’s perfect. It seals their fate. Kurt pulls Blaine’s body to his and they kiss until they can’t breathe anymore. They kiss until the world falls away and the worry sinks itself back into an ocean of things they’ll deal with tomorrow or maybe next week.

Everything will be okay.

And when Kurt gets home, he’ll take down all the colorful sticky notes because he has to find a way to leave something behind for Blaine to hold onto when Kurt isn’t there to do it himself.