When Blaine wakes up, everything is kind of weird and blurry. The lights are way too bright as well and he is fairly sure that this isn’t even his room. His room at Dalton doesn’t have those white walls and his bed… no, that isn’t even his bed. Where in the name of god is he?

“Blaine?” a voice next to his bed makes his head turn and he finds himself looking at Wes who has a rather worried, but at the same time relieved look on his face as he exhales deeply. “Thanks god you woke up.”

Frowning slightly, Blaine tries to sit up, but Wes throws his hands up instantly. “Woah there, curly. Stay put. I’m glad you’re even awake, I’d like to keep you that way.” He points out and pushes him back into the pillows as he slightly tips to the side in his attempt to remain upright.

“What- Where am I?” Blaine manages to mutter out, his tongue kind of heavy though he has no idea why. Now that he thinks about it, his head does sort of hurt. But it’s a dull pain, like it’s really far away and he can’t really be sure if it’s there or if he’s just imagining it.

“The hospital, Blaine.” Wes simply says.

That’s when Blaine notices why everything seems so strange. The plain walls, the chatting he can hear from the hallway, the beeping of some machine next to his bed. But why is he here? The last time he checked, he had been in his car and on the way to… yeah, where had he been going?

“What – What am I doing here?” he asks his friend, blinking tiredly into the blinding lights. Blinding lights, that makes some sort of picture arise in his head, but he can’t really put his finger on it.

“You got hit by a car. He was drunk and got onto your side of the road and hit you pretty badly.”

Slowly, Blaine finally raises one hand to his head – noticing there was some sort of needle attached to it - and carefully touches his head, wincing slightly when he finds the bandage around it.

He had read about car accidents and all that stuff, but actually being in one wasn’t really fun. Everything kind of hurts but not really and it is overall weird. He wonders if that is what it feels like to be on drugs. But then again, he probably is on some kind of medication.

“Do you know where I was going?” Blaine asks hopefully because he knows, he had been really happy and excited, he still feels the tingle in his stomach when he thinks about it, but he cannot remember, no matter how hard he tries.

“You know what, I’m going to go tell David and the rest of the boys you woke up. I think there’s someone way better who can answer that.” He smiles and with that, he gets up and leaves the room, leaving a confused Blaine behind. What was he even talking about?

“B-Blaine?” comes another voice, higher, softer.

Startled, Blaine turns his head to the other side of his bed, only now noticing there was someone else in the room.

“Are you okay?”

Blaine just blinks.

“Blaine?”

He frowns, thinks back, but doesn’t come to any conclusion.

“I’m sorry, but… who are you?” He finally asks.

There’s a long moment of silence and Blaine feels like he said a really bad and wrong thing.

“Kurt.” is the only answer he gets.

---

“You don’t remember me.” The other boy says. It’s not a question, it’s a statement. It looks like something is really, really wrong here.

“No.” Blaine says, staring at the boy some more, wondering where he knows him from. Maybe he’s a transfer student? Some new kid at Dalton that he doesn’t know that well and he’s a little confused anyways, so maybe he just can’t really remember right now? “Should I?” he asks carefully.

Kurt only laughs drily, rubbing a hand over his face before he sits back in his chair, shaking his head like this is all a dream.

“I suppose.” He finally answers, voice thin and Blaine just wants to tell him whatever is bugging him will be okay, but he has the bad feeling that he is sort of the reason for that.

So he just gives him a long, questioning look and Kurt sighs, turning his face away from him.

“Kurt, right?” Blaine asks softly. Kurt turns his head back towards him but keeps his eyes down at his lap, biting his lip nervously. “I’m sorry but I really, really don’t remember you. Can you just… where do I know you from?”

“I’m not sure if I should really tell you that. Don’t they always say you’re supposed to let the memory come back by itself?”

“Please.” Blaine basically begs and Kurt sighs, finally looking back up at him.

“Don’t freak out, okay?” Kurt says slowly and when Blaine gives a shaky nod, he continues. “I’m your boyfriend, Blaine.”

And that’s when Blaine, for the first time in his life, is really scared of himself.

---

It’s not until a week later that Blaine is released from hospital. He is told that the brain injury isn’t too bad and that the memory is probably going to come back in the next couple of days, but Blaine is still a little freaked out.

Wes picks him up and drives him straight to Dalton, even though it’s the weekend before summer break and the building his basically empty. But Blaine just really wants to see something he remembers, something that secures him and doesn’t make him feel like he’s crazy. And Dalton is just that.

But all that time, Wes has this weird expression on his face and won’t tell Blaine, even after he asked three times what’s up with that. Now that they arrived though, Blaine calms down a little as he recognizes the old walls and quickly follows Wes inside, taking a deep breath of the familiar scent.

That’s when he hears footsteps. Turning with a surprised look on his face, he focuses on the corner the noises are coming from.

“Dave, I really have no clue where you left your calculator. Did you really have to drag me all the way here to –“ Kurt cuts off when he suddenly stops right in front of Blaine and Wes.

“What are you doing here?” he asks, looking at pointedly at Wesley, but from the way he was shifting and his fingers fidget, it is pretty obvious that it takes a lot for him not to look at Blaine.

Without answering the question, Dave walks over to high-five Wes before they basically make a run for the door. “Have fun.” Dave has the nerve to shout over his shoulder before the heavy gates shut with a click that echoes loudly in the otherwise empty school.

The two boys stand in silence for a little while, each eyeing the floor in the most interested manner as if mystical patterns suddenly appeared there.

“I don’t think this is a good idea.” Kurt finally says quietly, eyes on the floor. “Aren’t you supposed to let the memory come back by itself and not confront you with it?”

Finally, Blaine looks up and though he still can’t remember a thing the look on Kurt’s face makes his heart break. He’s is boyfriend, in some way. He can’t even imagine how it must feel like when the person you’re with forgets you.

“Maybe it’s going to help.” He decides and steps closer, placing a hand on his shoulder and he can’t fight the feeling that this seems familiar. As Kurt lifts his head, their eyes meet for a moment and a stream of images flashes in Blaine’s mind for a faint second but it’s too quick and far away and so out of reach that he’s unable to hold it and really see anything. Before he really notices it, it’s gone again and all Blaine sees are those blue eyes at him again. Kurt’s gorgeous, that much is for sure. How did he even manage to get a boyfriend as stunning as him?

“Do you… want to walk around a bit?” Kurt finally says after they stood way too close and way too still for a few minutes and just stared at each other. Or maybe it was the exact right thing. It would be for boyfriends, only that Blaine can’t remember that they are. So he just nods at Kurt’s question and follows him as they make their way up the stairs.

“Kurt?” he asks about halfway up. “Can you… tell me something about you? Your favourite movie? Anything?”

Kurt nods and as they reach the top floor, he answers with a thoughtful smile playing along his lips. “Harry and Sally.” He said quietly and Blaine sees some spark in his eye and wonders what that is about. “I really like that story.”

“Me too.” Blaine says and thinks it’s a little silly. If they really are boyfriends, Kurt probably knows things like that. “They get together in the end, don’t they?” he asks, making sure he remembers the movie correctly.

That’s when Kurt stops in his tracks and stares at him, eyes wide and lips parted. And here Blaine is, guessing he just said something stupid again. “Kurt?”

The other boy swallows thickly and rubs the back of his hand over his eyes, making Blaine think he just saw a bit of glistening there. And how much he wishes he could just reach out and tell him that things would be okay. But even more, he wishes he could just remember. Why won’t he stupid head work properly?

He thinks he can smell coffee there for a moment when he repeats the line he just said in his head. He hears music too and there’s something else, something he feels like he doesn’t exactly want to remember right now. But as soon as it all came, as soon it all is gone again and Blaine feels bad about it all again, seeing as Kurt still has this look on his face.

“I-I’m so sorry…” he says softly and steps closer, but Kurt backs away, shaking his head slightly. The smile he gives then looks anything but real.

“I’m okay. Don’t worry. Let’s go on.” He swallows and leads the way again. When they pass the cabinet with the trophies in them, Blaine stops and squints at them.

“What’s wrong?” Kurt asks and walks back from where he had almost turned the corner before he had noticed Blaine had been missing.

“That trophy,” Blaine says, pointing at a larger one and Kurt can’t help but giggle about how his nose is almost pressed up against the glass.

“Sectionals.” He explains quietly, scratching the back of his head. “Both us and the choir of my old school won.”

“Your old school?”

“Yeah, well I attended another school but people weren’t very accepting there and when the bullying got too bad I came here but then a few weeks ago I transferred back and…” he cuts himself off when he realizes he’s rambling and this is all probably really confusing to Blaine. “Sorry.” He mutters and pouts, eyeing the floor.

Blaine can’t help but giggle at the sight, shaking his head slightly. “I think it’s adorable.” He points out and winks at him before he walks on.

Once again Kurt is left speechless and Blaine would really, really like to know why this keeps happening. This is the second time already.

“Are you okay?” he asks, hoping to get a proper answer now.

“Yeah, it’s just… you told me that the week we got together…” he says softly and Blaine’s heart sinks. He doesn’t want to hurt Kurt any further. Maybe this really was all a stupid idea. The memory has to come back eventually, right? It’s not normal not to remember your own boyfriend! It’s just not right.

“Don’t worry about it, Blaine. Just… let’s go on.” Kurt says and Blaine is sure he saw the look on his face. He wishes so much that he could just remember, slap his forehead and go ‘Oh, of course! Kurt! How could I even forget that!’ and they could be okay again. But it doesn’t happen, no matter how hard he tries.

When he snaps out of it, he notices Kurt is gone. He must have gone on without Blaine even noticing. Damn. Looking around, he walks to the end of the hallway and needs to decide to go left towards the dorms or to the right where the common rooms are.

Just when he picks the dorms, he hears music. It’s not some radio blasting down the hall, just soft piano chords. They’re barely there but Blaine recognizes the melody instantly. Teenage Dream. Following the music, he turns and walks towards the common rooms.

In the doorway, he stops as another flashback hits him. It’s just seconds of pictures in his head: some box, glitter. He suddenly feels all warm and his lips tingle and he doesn’t know what’s going on but before he can worry, it’s over. He hates that this keeps happening, that bits of what he can’t remember comes flashing back but he isn’t able to grasp it properly and hold it. He just feels like he has no power at all.

But once he is actually back in the real world, he notices where the chords come from. Kurt is sat on the piano on the opposite side, his fingers slowly moving over the keys in an experienced manor. Once again, he thinks he can smell candles and tea and cookies. He thinks he can feel the warmth from the fireplace and … Christmas. He feels like it’s Christmas. Right before summer holiday are going to start. Yep, Blaine Anderson is pretty sure he’s not only loosing his memory but also going insane now. Perfect.

But the music drags him back, makes him smile and pulls him into the room and over to where Kurt sits. He walks quietly, not wanting to disturb the wonderful sounds that seem to remind him of a better time.

“That was beautiful.” He says softly once Kurt finishes.

The other boy’s head snaps around and for a moment, Blaine thinks Kurt is going to fall off the bench, but he doesn’t.

“I didn’t hear you.” He explains as he turns back, letting his fingers brush over the keys without playing.

“I’ve been looking for you.” Blaine says and Kurt’s shoulder’s slump. For a moment, Blaine thinks he’s just thinking or remembering notes, but then he notices that there’s a picture on the music stand in front of him.

He’s on it too. It shows both of them, Kurt with some crown on his head and his arm tightly around Blaine’s neck with the other arm stretched out towards the camera, obviously trying to block the few. Blaine sees himself grinning widely, wrapped around Kurt’s waist and pushing his face against his cheek in what looks like the attempt of a kiss. He smiles.

That’s when he realizes Kurt’s looking at it too and his shoulders are trembling slightly.

“Kurt,” he says softly, reaching out to place a hand against his back, but it only makes Kurt press one hand to his face, his head downcast.

And Blaine can’t take that, he can’t live with the knowledge he’s making a boy who seems so sincere and kind and incredibly gorgeous so miserable. So he walks around the bench and sits down next to him, not even hesitating before he wraps his arms around him and tugs him close. Kurt’s a little stiff at fist but eventually relaxes into Blaine’s arms, sobbing softly into his shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” Blaine whispers and tucks Kurt under his chin, slowly stroking his back as the other boy pushed against him. “I wish I could just flip my memory back on like a light bulb and remember. I mean you’re my boyfriend and –“

“No, that’s the point.” Kurt says wetly against his shoulder, “You can’t remember we’re dating. You can’t remember we’re in love and you can’t remember me, Blaine. I’m not – I won’t make you keep this up. You shouldn’t even be around me. Until your memory comes back, I think… I think it would be best to not see each other. At least not for a bit.” And Blaine can basically hear the heartbreak in his words.

Kurt’s too good for him, he hopes he knew that when he still remembered him. He’s the most caring person he had ever met and simply being around him makes him happy. But maybe he’s right. He sees how much this is hurting Kurt and he doesn’t want to keep doing this, keep making the person who seemed to truly love him hurt. So he doesn’t fight it when Kurt pulls away and wipes his face with the sleeve of his sweater.

“I should, you –“ Kurt cuts off, and Blaine takes the hint and gets up, biting his lip harshly because he really doesn’t want to leave. But he knows he has to, to maybe, be able to make Kurt smile again eventually.

He stops behind the bench to give Kurt’s shoulder a last squeeze, a pathetic excuse of an apology. “Goodbye, Kurt.” He says softly and Kurt turns halfway on the bench, glancing up at him.

“I’m never saying goodbye to you.” He says, voice thick with emotion and Blaine stands still.

He looks into those blue, green, grey eyes, watches them switch their colour seemingly all the time. Watches how Kurt blinks up at him through his lashes, a few unshed tears still in the corners of his eyes, waiting to spill over. But most of all, he watches himself look back. It’s like he can see himself in there, somewhere deep down.

The fog in his head seems to clear a little at the bright colours of Kurt’s eyes and the sentence rings in his ears. I’m never saying goodbye to you. And then, he thinks he feels arms around him, feels his face buried in a shoulder and hears the words whispered into his ear over and over again, until they fully sink in.

The schoolyard, the stairs and a piano.

“Kurt,” he chokes, staring down at the eyes that turn from sad to questioning.

Coffee, silly songs and birds.

“Blaine?” Kurt asks, turning towards him on the bench fully.

Waking up in a huge bed, awkward talks and Regionals.

“Kurt,” he says again, his eyes getting watery as well as he steps back, looks at Kurt and takes a shaky breath.

A kiss, hands touching gently, prom.

“Blaine, what’s wrong?” Kurt asks and now there’s pure concern in his voice and eyes.

I love you.

“Oh God,” Blaine whispers out before he drops to his knees and leaps forward in the same second, grabbing at Kurt’s shoulders, neck, everything he can grasp and pulls him in.

How could he, how could he ever forget? It’s not right, it’s weird but it’s in the past. It’s over. And Kurt, Kurt is here and he still feels the same and Blaine’s head is spinning as he finally presses an urgent, needy kiss to his lips, sucks on his bottom lip to just feel him again. He needs him, he needs him so very much.

And as he grabs at Kurt’s sweater, the other boy slips from the bench and on the ground as well. He doesn’t question, just pushes his hands into Blaine’s hair and pulls him in as well. Blaine thinks he might pass out from the mixture of all the memories finally kicking in and the massive lack of oxygen, but he couldn’t care less right now. Kurt’s lips are exactly the right kind of rough to still be soft against his. That’s when he realizes by now, he has tears running down his face as well but god, this is the best feeling in the world.

When the kiss finally does break, they stay close, breathing each other’s air as they hold on to one another. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, Kurt. I just, I couldn’t-“

He’s cut off by another messy kiss, Kurt biting on his bottom lip in the way that always makes Blaine whimper and beg for more and that’s exactly what he does. Whining as Kurt pulls back again, Kurt nuzzles into his neck and breathes in.

“I missed you,” he whispers. “I missed you so much.”

“I love you.” Blaine says and blinks, trying to clear his view again.

“I love you too.” Kurt answers softly as he pulls away from Blaine’s neck to look at him before he leans in to kiss away the tears on his face.

“I’ll never forget you again.” Blaine promises as he cups Kurt’s face with both hands and brushes his thumbs over his cheeks to rid him off all leftover tears as well.

“Well, I won’t let you.” Kurt chuckles wetly and pulls Blaine’s hands from his face to hold them in his.

They look at each other for a few more moments, simply smiling and bathing in each other’s love. Blaine doesn’t think he has ever been this happy again. He has no clue how he forgot all of this and he has the feeling it’s still going to bug him for a bit but he has Kurt and he knows Kurt will always be there for him. He won’t be alone.

Because just like Kurt, he’ll never say goodbye.