Blaine's first day back at McKinley had started very strangely. As much as he'd talked to Finn after he'd left the Hummels' house he hadn't really expected the other boy to approach him on school grounds. Especially not when everyone had been there to see the spectacle. In some ways it had done him some good, though. Everyone was so busy talking about the unexpected development that they hadn't bothered to shove him around, trip him, or slushy him.

So far, anyway.

Blaine knew that would change by the afternoon; tomorrow morning if he was lucky. Nobody would let this pass by for long. If Finn actually went to Glee Club in a few hours and officially joined, then things would definitely get worse. Blaine had a way out now at least. After thinking over his choices and everything he would be dropping at McKinley, Blaine had decided to stay, but he'd made a deal with his father that if things got worse or he changed his mind he could transfer to Dalton at any time.

That any time might be sooner than he'd thought it would be if Finn continued on his current course. At least then Glee would have someone to take Blaine's spot. Right now they had nobody who could tolerate dancing with Rachel, which was a large part of why he had stayed. There were a few other reasons – questions, really – that he had, but if the answers he found were his worst fears he'd be gone just as quickly.

During lunch Blaine went through the line quickly, then ducked out of the side door and tucked himself away in the little corner between the stairs and the building. This year none of his friends had the same lunch as he did on odd days. Usually he ducked out and ate in one of the bathrooms or the Glee room, but he really didn't feel like dodging a bunch of hall monitors today. Besides, all the staring and whispering was starting to unnerve him. He wasn't used to this kind of attention at McKinley. It made his skin crawl because he knew once the other kids had talked it out until there wasn't anything else to say, they'd start in on him. Heading outside in the middle of winter was the safest option. None of the jocks would ever think to look for him out there.

Blaine set his tray down on the ground, took his backpack off, and pulled on his gloves and hat. It was freezing outside, though not as cold as the week of Christmas had been. He settled down on the frozen concrete for a quiet lunch, but then the door he'd just exited creaked open.

Instantly on guard, Blaine stiffened and listened closely, thinking a teacher had caught sight of him on his way out. There was no reason for anyone who hadn't followed him to be outside right now. Snow covered the ground so gym classes were held inside, all of his friends had different lunch times, and the bleachers and places the rougher crowds frequented were on the opposite side of the building.

Carefully Blaine raised his head a few inches and peered over the edge of the concrete stairs. A bright red Cheerios uniform greeted him. In some ways it was the last thing he'd expected, but part of him was glad. Kurt had followed him – had searched Blaine out of his own freewill. Now he might get a few questions answered; he might even be heading home to start packing up his things if this went badly.

"I'm down here," Blaine offered, startling Kurt, who jumped and spun around.

Kurt's cheeks were already starting to turn blue and his arms were wrapped tightly around his torso to try to stop his shivering.

"H- hi," Kurt stammered, coming down the stairs and turning into Blaine's little spot. "Can... can we talk?"

Blaine shrugged and gestured to the empty space next to him. "Floor's yours." Kurt cast a quick look around. "There's nobody else out here," Blaine assured him, slightly annoyed.

With a nod Kurt dropped down onto the concrete next to him, shivering. Blaine pulled his tray closer to himself and started to eat, waiting for Kurt to speak. Even now he knew not to push Kurt into talking until he was ready. It was something he'd learned years ago the first time he'd asked Kurt where his mother was.

"I didn't expect to see you today," Kurt began quietly. "Or ever again, actually."

Blaine grunted around a mouthful of taco, but said nothing else. If he let Kurt talk, or at least let the silence work the other boy, then maybe, just maybe, his Kurt would make another appearance and prove him right. Maybe he'd know that he'd somehow made the right decision when he wasn't basing it solely on Glee Club. If Kurt could start being himself around Blaine then maybe he could get his old friend back and they could find a way to move past everything.

"I kind of hate you for coming back," Kurt said more loudly, scowling at his knees. "You– there's so much more and b- better for you at Dalton. But... I think I'm glad, too. Never seeing you again, it– it doesn't seem right."

Blaine nodded once more, shoving the rest of his taco into his mouth so he didn't have to talk. Kurt felt something, though. Something potent and difficult for him to understand. He was slowly reminding Blaine of the boy he'd known, even if it was only in little unexpected bursts.

Kurt clenched and unclenched his hands, finally looking up and over at Blaine. He was surprised at the agony on Kurt's face when their eyes meant, and he didn't fully understand it until Kurt continued to speak.

"Why would you do this to yourself? After everything that's happened to you here – after everything I've put you through – I just... I don't get why you'd put yourself through any more of this," Kurt flustered, looking, to Blaine's bafflement, hurt.

"There's a lot of reasons I stayed," Blaine said evasively. "I have responsibilities to Glee, to Finn as his tutor, to my clubs– "

"So I had nothing t- to do with your decision?" Kurt asked, sounding terrified of the impending answer.

"Not everything is about you, Kurt," Blaine said sternly. Kurt swallowed hard and stared out towards the parking lot.

"I know that," Kurt returned, clenching his jaw tightly. "Well, I'm... learning it. You're teaching me that. You've always taught me things, I just sucked at listening for a lot of it."

Blaine snorted. "Or you just chose not to abide by any of it." He sighed tiredly and pushed his tray away, deciding to narrow in on one of his most pressing questions. "Look, you kissed me, Kurt– "

"On the cheek," Kurt said defensively.

"I want to know why. I want to know if the boy who let himself care about me is who you want to be or if you'd rather be the guy who's going to slushy me Friday morning," Blaine admitted. "I've always known that my Kurt, my best friend, was worth the effort, but you... I don't know what to think of you. You're him for split seconds and then the rest of the time... "

Inside the bell dismissing lunch rang. Blaine climbed to his feet, grabbing his bag and tray. He turned back and looked down at Kurt's stunned, conflicted face.

"I get how difficult all of this is for you. It's not easy for me, either. Sometimes I just want to smack you for all of this, but I know who you can be. I know I can forgive that boy if he really makes the effort."

Before Kurt could even stand up, Blaine headed back into the cafeteria to dump his tray. He took Kurt's silence and willingness to listen as a good sign. He just hoped some of what he'd said would really have an impact in some way. There was only so much more he could take before he called all of this quits.

Just like Kurt had assured him Burt had pulled Blaine right into a big bear hug when they'd sat him down and told him that Blaine was gay. Blaine hadn't really been too worried about Burt's reaction considering he'd realized that Burt knew of his own crush on Kurt. The comfort was still nice, along with the invite to spend the night.

"Boys, pizza's here!"

Blaine perked up immediately, his stomach growling loudly as Kurt shut his history book. Burt hollered down to them again followed by the sound of the front door slamming closed.

"Come on," Kurt encouraged. Blushing furiously as Kurt linked their hands together, Blaine allowed himself to be tugged along behind the other boy to the main level of the house.

They met Burt in the hall on the way to the kitchen. A tower of pizza boxes blocked most of Burt from their view and Blaine quickly took the top half as Kurt rolled his eyes and took a few himself.

"Really, Dad? I'll barely eat three slices. We don't need eight pizzas," Kurt said, leading the way into the kitchen.

Burt snorted and nudged Blaine to follow Kurt. "I seem to recall catching a certain Anderson sneaking into the kitchen a few nights ago for a second dinner," Burt countered.

Embarrassed, Blaine dropped his stack onto the kitchen counter and sheepishly met Kurt's stern gaze. "I was hungry," he defended miserably.

"Maybe you should have just bought him a cow," Kurt told his father. "I think it would have been cheaper."

"Oh, shut up," Blaine grumbled.

Burt laughed as they continued to mock each other, tugging a few plates out of the nearest cabinet and handing one to each of them. They all loaded up their plates; Blaine ended up with an entire pizza box when Burt saw how much he was piling up. As they settled down at the table and started to eat talk quickly turned to school. This surprised Blaine since he'd figured Burt would ask more about his coming out, but he didn't pester him. It was one of the things he liked best about Kurt's father.

Kurt, however–

"– and then Coach said I'm in the running for her top three choices for Squad captain next year!" Kurt exclaimed. "The rest of the girls are even starting to talk to me, and– "

"How's Glee Club going?" Burt cut in delicately, eyeing Blaine's sullen look. "You lot are getting ready for some sort of competition, right?"

Kurt rolled his eyes and pulled his napkin from his lap. "It's just so we can qualifty to enter the competitions. Honestly, I think I might stop going. Rachel gets all of the solos and – "

"What?" Blaine gasped in disbelief. "But you love Glee. We have so much fun with it. The male soloist still needs to be picked– "

"Which will be you," Kurt said certainly. "You're the best guy in the group.

"You don't know that," Blaine said, flushing with a mixture of happiness at Kurt's praise and horror at the turn of the conversation. "Mr. Schue hasn't even held the auditions yet. I don't think I'll try out because my voice is still changing and cracking."

"Well, he would never pick me," Kurt argued as Burt looked on in alarmed confusion. "He doesn't want a boy who can sing as high as his female lead."

Blaine's stomach dropped at Kurt's words. He knew Kurt was right, and as much as he reassured Kurt that his voice would drop and change before long he was really starting to believe it wouldn't. Even a year before his own had started changing his voice had cracked and squeaked at random, but not Kurt's. His voice was as steady and high as ever.

With a quick, pleading look at Burt, Blaine tried another tactic.

"But it's the only school activity we still do together," Blaine said miserably. "Even if we just get stuck in the background at least we get to hang out together."

"I– we still hang out all the time after school," Kurt winced at the look Blaine shot him and amended, "after practice. But Cheerios are guaranteed to go to Nationals this year. There's going to be so much work and tons of extra practices, and then games once the football season starts on Friday. Glee Club doesn't do anything– "

To Blaine's relief Burt finally figured out something to say. "Kurt, you signed up and auditioned for Glee and you'll stick with it, understand? You don't want to quit something after only a few weeks. Who knows, maybe if you audition you will get that– that solo guy thing."

Kurt snorted in disbelief, and wiped his mouth with his napkin. "Between Coach and Schuester that's never going to happen."

"Why would Coach Sylvester have anything to do with your Glee stuff?" Burt asked, but Blaine was already tuning out what he knew would be a quick, topic change from Kurt.

There was no way Coach Sylvester would want one of her precious Cheerios, usually a potential captain, in Glee Club. Not only would it take time away from her training, but it would bring down the whole squads reputation. He briefly wondered if she'd already set Kurt down and made a few not so subtle hints to quick, but either way it was going to happen. Neither of them had factored Coach Sylvester into any of this, the other Cheerios, certainly. But not the Coach.

They really hadn't thought this Cheerios thing through, and judging by the pissed off expression on Kurt's face as Burt lectured him about responsibilities to commitments, his best friend was getting in way deeper than Blaine had ever imagined.

Blaine didn't see Kurt for the rest of the day. There were no taunting passes in the halls with Santana and Quinn, no surprise slushies, or shoulder checks into lockers. It felt almost eerie for Kurt, a top Cheerio, to disappear off the McKinley radar so easily. Even when Blaine met up with Finn after class to lead the other boy to his first Glee Club meeting there was no sign of Kurt or Quinn to put a stop to it.

"So we're just singing that song you told me about, right?" Finn asked anxiously, looking around the vacant hall they had turned down. "I don't think I'll be much for dancing."

"Mr. Schue might show us a little choreography," Blaine answered, pushing the choir room door open. "It shouldn't be a lot, though."

The moment Blaine entered with Finn at his side the entire room fell silent. Tina and Mike looked surprised, but quickly helped Blaine usher their newest member into the room. Artie and Mercedes looked amazed and cautious, while Rachel –

"Blaine, Blaine," she hissed, tugging on his shirt sleeve so hard she threatened to tear it off. Blaine let her lead him away from Mike, Finn, and Tina to the far side of the room. "Blaine, do you know who that is? Is this serious?"

"Yeah, I'm aware," Blaine sighed, pulling his sleeve free and frowning at how stretched it now was. "He wanted to join and he can sing."

Rachel was barely listening; she wasn't even looking at him. Blaine mentally groaned, taking in the eager light now in her eyes. Great, Rachel was smitten all ready.

"I want to sing with him," Rachel said suddenly. "Today. You don't mind sitting out a solo, right, Blaine?"

"Well, actually – "

Before Blaine could finish Rachel had dashed over to Tina, Mike, and Finn and forced her way into the small group. Finn looked slightly terrified as she focused completely on him, but Blaine only rolled his eyes and gave the panicked looking boy a thumbs up. At least he wouldn't have any problems with Rachel. She would have undoubtedly been the worst to handle.

By the time rehearsal ended two hours later, Mercedes was raging about being Beyoncé, Artie had a bloody nose from Rachel's too enthusiastic leap towards Finn's not waiting arms, Rachel was making even bigger heart eyes at Finn, and Mike and Tina were fused together at the mouth. Mr. Schuester seemed happy with their newest member despite some of the others' criticisms.

Tired, Blaine saved Finn from Rachel's overzealousness and they headed over to the Hummels' house for their tutoring session. Barely half an hour in they decided to call it quits and Blaine went home, surprised that Kurt hadn't shown up before he'd left, but slightly glad for the Cheerio's absence. He wanted Kurt to have time to think before they spoke again. He wanted to have his own time to think and decide what answers would be a good reason for him to stay and what wouldn't.

The smell of lasagna filled Blaine's nostrils when he finally entered his own house. He hadn't expected his mother to make anything for dinner tonight since his father was out of town until Sunday and she knew Blaine would be home late. She was just setting the dish on the cooling rack when Blaine stepped into the kitchen.

"You didn't have to make anything," Blaine said immediately.

She jumped slightly, clutching her chest as Blaine walked over to greet her.

"You have got to stop that," she scolded, accepting his hug. "You're going to give me heart attack sneaking up on me like that."

"Sorry," Blaine murmured, holding her tightly when she moved to step back. For right now he couldn't bear to pull himself away. It was so nice to feel welcomed and safe after his first day back at McKinley. As always she seemed to just understand what he needed, stroking his curls and kissing his forehead. For once he was glad she wasn't that much shorter than he was, and on days like this when she wore heels it made it that much simpler to sink into her arms – no slouching or ducking, just stepping right into her embrace.

"I love you with all my heart, you know that, Blaine?" she murmured, continuing to stroke his hair. "Your father won't tell me the specifics of what's going on with you and school, but whenever you're ready to tell me, I'm here, okay?"

Instead of speaking, Blaine nodded against her thick curls, breathing deeply as he finally pulled back. "I know. I just– I don't want to worry you. Cooper did that enough."

"Not knowing worries me just as much," she said simply, once more brushing his curls back before turning to the cabinet above the dishwasher and opening it.

For a few minutes Blaine just watched her work; pulling down two plates, digging utensils out of various drawers and pulling a large bowl of salad out of the refrigerator for them to split. It wasn't that he didn't trust her, or want her advice; he could actually really use it. But the thought of telling her just had bad things were – about how his best friend had become one of his worst tormentors – made his stomach clench up like it was trying to digest itself.

Her patience would only last so long, just like his resilience with the cruelty he faced at McKinley. Perhaps she'd be able to help him decide what to do once he got the answers he wanted from Kurt. Surely she'd dated before his father, even had her heart broken or had a best friend who dumped her. There was only so much Blaine was still comfortable talking about with his father, and the specifics of his heartache for another boy wasn't on that list yet.

Blaine accepted a plate piled high with lasagna and another with a heap of salad and set them on the table.

"You remember Kurt, right?"

"Of course," Lyra answered, grabbing her own plates and thanking Blaine as he pulled her chair out for her and then took his own seat. "It's been such a long time since you've had him around."

"Well, there's... there's a reason for that," Blaine admitted slowly, carefully mixing his salad up. At her concerned look Blaine sighed and started in on summarizing the past two years. He talked as he ate, barely noticing that his mother wasn't eating, but was instead looking horrified by everything he was telling her.

By the end of his tale she was wiping her eyes and looking very upset. "I can't believe he– oh, Blaine," she whispered. "I'm so sorry. I always suspected you liked him, but... "

Lyra shook her head sadly and dabbed at her eyes again.

Blaine set his fork down on his empty plate and reached across the table to squeeze her hand. "It's okay. Well, it's not, but... it might be. I stayed with them over Christmas since Coop cancelled. He's... Kurt's still in there." Blushing slightly Blaine looked down at the table as he continued, "He kissed me on the cheek when he dropped me off. It's one of the reasons I didn't transfer to Dalton immediately. I know it's probably stupid after everything, but... if there's a chance that I can– can help him realize who he really is then I want to. He was my best friend, I... I loved him," Blaine acknowledged quietly. "I might hate who he's become half of the time, but I don't want to give up when I've seen the boy I once fell in love with."

His mother sighed and set her napkin on the table. "I always knew your selflessness would get you in trouble," she told him, smiling slightly. "But I do understand. Your heart knows what it wants – wanted – and it's hard to ignore that, even when your head says to abandon it all. Kurt's... high school can change people, Blaine. I don't know how deep these changes are for Kurt, if they're only skin deep or just who he is now, but I do trust you to know him better than me."

"It is him during those moments, I'm positive of it," Blaine said. "There's this look in his eyes... I can't explain it, but I know if I give up and run to Dalton I'll never forgive myself for it. Not until I have a few answers."

"To why he kissed you," Lyra deduced.

"On the cheek," Blaine added, face burning, which made Lyra laugh and smile.

"I think the most important thing to have in those answers is honesty," Lyra decided. "Even if it's an uncertain answer, or not the one you're hoping for. If he's honest, then your own decision should be easier."

"Thanks, Mama."

"Of course, dear," his mother replied. "Any more boy problems you come to me, all right? I don't think your father's quite ready for that."

Blaine nodded in agreement. He didn't know what sort of answer Kurt would give him, or how many he would have to endure before he got an honest one, but he hoped he could survive McKinley long enough to hear it.