"Dad? Dad, Papa, Im home!"

Xavier stomped his boots on the mat in the foyer and shook the snow out of his hair. A snowstorm on Christmas Eve, of all days. The drive from his college had been a complete nightmare. He pulled his gloves, scarf, and coat off. His bag of laundry could wait until it stopped. There were plenty of clothes still up in his room.

"Papa? Dad?"

Silence. He frowned down the little hallway towards the kitchen and dining room. No delicious smells or chatter or music. Nothing. Had they changed the house this year without telling him? Xavier clocked it in his head. Last year at his uncles. 2046 had been his grandparents. Then Evans the year before, Aunt Lilys in 2044, and back to his dads house in Milton. Oliver was the only other possibility, but he, his husband, and their twin boys lived in an apartment in New York City. The whole family could never fit in there. It was definitely their house this year.

"Hello?" Xavier hollered, but nobody answered. There wasnt even a fire in the grate when he passed by. He was getting ready to settle down and stare at the twelve-foot tall Christmas tree until he fell asleep when something creaked upstairs. Then it squeaked and knocked against the wall high on the left of the living room. Coles room. Someone was home then. Home and ignoring him.

Xavier hurried upstairs and flung his brothers door open. "Did you seriously ignore me– Oh, gross!"

Cole was spread out, face down, on the bed, his current girlfriend on top of him. Xavier covered his eyes with his arm, but he could still hear the bed creaking as she – was this Jamie or Paige? – thrust against him.

"Oh, Jamie, right there– Xavier, get out!"

Xavier fumbled blindly for the door and slammed it shut. Face burning, he tried not to retch as their groans followed him back towards the stairs and the balcony overlooking the living room and the enormous tree. He leaned his forearms on it, and stared down at it until he saw stars. Anything to get rid of the last image hed seen. God, his brother was ridiculous.

The front door opened. Xavier spun around and looked down over the other side.

"There you go, sweetheart," he heard his dads voice say as a pregnant belly stepped through the doorway. "Go put your feet up. Well get the rest of the groceries."

"Anna!"

His sister looked up and beamed as he hurried down to hug her. She was of average height with brown curly hair, and Papas eyes but she looked so much like Dad it gave him the creeps sometimes. Finally, someone was here besides himself and the Horny Duo. He pulled back and looked her and her swollen belly over. Being away at school had completely wiped her surprise pregnancy from his mind.

"Gosh, your bellys so big," he blurted. She smacked his stomach. "Sorry, I just wasnt expecting it."

"Well, Im due next month," she reminded him. She leaned in as Dad and Papa bustled in with grocery bags. "Is Cole still taking it up the ass?"

Xavier grimaced in answer.

Anna rolled her eyes. "At least hes kept this one around for a while. She was the one at the pool party over the summer, remember? Jamie or Jasmine or Just-Passing-Through."

Xavier laughed and together they followed their dads into the kitchen where he finally got his bear hugs and the delicious smell of dinner started to fill the house.

Cole strutted down the stairs an hour later, Jamie trailing behind and patting his ass every few steps.

"I dont know how you arent sore after that," she whispered. She was quite tall, as tall as Dad, but still six inches shorter than himself, with caramel skin, and bright brown eyes. Her hair was kept short, but neat. Jamie adjusted his hoodie on her shoulders as they stepped into the foyer.

"I havent been sore from that in years." Cole shrugged as they turned through the dining room to the kitchen. "Just dont look Xavier in the eye, all right? Well never hear the end of it if everyone knows what we did all day."

"And night," Jamie added.

They stepped into the kitchen where the others were talking and laughing over some dorm story Xavier was telling. Cole glanced around in surprise at the small group. His dads, his sister and her helium belly, and Xavier. No Evan and his horde or Oliver and his Yankee. No grandparents, aunts, uncles, nieces, or nephews.

"Where is everyone?" he demanded. He took the bar stool next to Anna as his brother and dads chopped and diced and stirred. "Were missing, like, two dozen people."

Anna frowned and nudged him with her foot. "Two dozen? Really? Theres only–"

"Evan, Beth, and their horde, so thats nine. Add Ollies and were at thirteen. Then Aunt Lilys, so seventeen, grandparents brings it to nineteen if we only count Pop and Grandma Carole. Add Uncle–"

"All right, all right," Anna snapped. "You made your point." She snatched another cookie from the basket on the counter. "The storm," she said finally. "They all decided not to risk it because of the snowstorm."

"Dont blame them either," Xavier said as he texted someone on his phone."Theres already a foot out there. Campus was a blizzard trying to get to my car. Johns stuck at the airport in Philly trying to get home."

Papa danced past with a cutting board of diced peppers. "All flights will probably be grounded until they get it cleared up. Supposed to snow until early morning on Boxing Day."

Jamie gave a low whistle and grabbed a cookie. "Guess well be here for a while."

"As long as this little one stays put," Anna said as she rubbed her stomach, "then were good to go. Unless you know how to deliver a baby already?" she smiled teasingly at Xavier. "Is my handsome doctor brother ready to help me deliver?"

Xavier made a face and shook his head. "Youd be better with Cole than me. I stay away from vaginas."

"From what I understand Cole doesnt have much interest in them either," Anna added.

Cole glared at her. "Just because you walk in when Im taking in up the–"

"Whoa! Okay, no more!" Dad hollered. He pointed his spatula at them all in turn. "I dont care if you have sex lives, but we do not want to be a part of them, got it?"

The boys nodded and Anna rolled her eyes. "Does that mean I should wear one of those impressive Victorian gowns with the hooped arches under the skirt so you cant see my little bundle of sexual intercourse?"

Xavier choked on the cookie hed just bitten into. Dad and Papa sighed loudly and ignored her.

"When are you due?" Jamie asked curiously, clearly trying to get off the subject.

Cole tuned out quickly and circled around the counter into the kitchen. Thinking about Anna having a baby was weird. Thinking about Xavier in college was weird. Only yesterday theyd all been teenagers living here day in and day out. Evan and Oliver had been the adults back then, struggling to make rent and to call once a week so Papa didnt fret. Now he was suddenly twenty-three with a steady girlfriend and a decent job. When had he stopped being sixteen?

"Are there any– yes, nipple cookies!" Cole scooped five up and burnt his hand on the baking sheet. "Ouch!"

Dad sighed in exasperation. "Twenty years youve been burning yourself for cookies."

"Twenty years and he still hasnt learned," Papa finished. They both chuckled as Cole shoved the first Hershey Kiss topped peanut butter cookie into his mouth.

Anna quickly realized that the greatest thing about being home for the holidays and pregnant was not having to make food for herself. Her dads were cooking constantly. There was a fully-stocked refrigerator of everything she could dream up, and if she hesitated for even a second while looking in the pantry one of them was there, asking what she wanted as they grabbed their car keys.

As the six of them sat down in the dining room with their completed meal, Anna sighed happily and rubbed the same spot the baby had been kicking for the past hour. Two huge homemade dishes of lasagna – one vegetable and the other a more traditional Italian style – salads, garlic biscuits, and sopapillas drizzled in honey and cinnamon sugar for desserts. Her dads kitchen was paradise.

"Tuck in," Papa said as he sat down the last plate. "I expect this table cleared by the time Dad has to pop the button on his jeans."

"Blaine, I do not–"

"Its okay to have a cute little belly," Papa said. He silenced Dad with a kiss and patted his stomach. "Youll have one as cute as Annas soon enough."

"At least yours wont kick," Anna reminded him. "Oh, I wish shed stop. I need that rib."

Everyone started eating. Anna filled both of the plates that had been set down in front of her, one with a heaping salad, the second with two large slabs of lasagna. She wolfed them down as everyone talked, and piled her lasagna plate up again. To her right, Jamie and Cole kept giggling and feeding each other bites. She wondered if hed realized how in love he was yet. Xavier certainly had. He kept batting his eyes at Cole and making sly little comments.

Her dads sat across from them, being just as adorable as theyd ever been. She didnt understand how they could still be so sweet together after almost forty years.

Devon had been a wonderful woman, smart and full of excitement, but shed had no interest in settling down or having even one child. James hadnt been much different. Love was nice, so was romance and sex, but it wasnt everything either. Shed decided to have a baby by herself almost a year ago. She didnt need a romantic partner. She was quite content with herself, her life, her friends, and the soon to be baby added to it.

"Hows work?" Xavier asked her. "I havent read the latest issue."

Anna shrugged and rubbed her stomach as she finished her second plate. "Its nice having an excuse to work from home all the time. Well, from here as its been since September. Oh, we did have this great article on a band we used to see in town all the time. You remember Magicool? They signed with Adeline out in Berkeley. They actually live a few blocks over from my new apartment. Youll have to come by this summer and see it."

"And to meet my niece or nephew or gender-neutral variant of that," Xavier cooed at her belly. "What is the gender-neutral variant of that relationship?"

"No idea. Im sure Riley will have a suggestion. Theyre always coming up with great options," Anna said. "Ouch! Thats my rib, kiddo. Please, pick somewhere else."

Xavier crinkled his nose and stared at her belly. "How weird is it? Having something moving around in there?"

"Its even weirder when she presses her foot against my belly. You can see the outline of it now," Anna raised her sweater a little and tapped by her protruding belly button. A little foot thumped against the spot and then pushed.

"Wow, doesnt that hurt?"

Anna shook her head. "Not right there. It does up higher or when she sits on my bladder like right now. Yup, shes bulldozing the three cups of Cherry Pomegranate juice I just downed. Dibs on the bathroom!"

Bath time had once been Olivers favorite part of the evening. In the first years of their marriage it had been a time to relax together and talk. Then it had become a discussion time for a name, then two names, and then a family experience when the boys had moved from the sink to the tub. Even through their first year and a half, bath time had been soothing and a nice break for him. Now, with two precocious four-year-olds, it was a devastating attempt at staying dry and patient.

"Julian, Donovan, this is a bathroom, not the site of a tidal wave!"

Another wave of water splattered in Olivers face. "Caden! Get your butt in here and help me wash their hair!"

A pot clattered in the kitchen sink down the hall. "Just a minute!"

"Now!" Oliver hollered as Julian painted his face with bubbles. "Julian, you two have had your fun, its time to get clean and get out so Santa can come, okay?"

"No!" Julian shouted defiantly. He shook his head so hard his dark hair flung water all over the bathroom. Beside him, Donovan giggled.

"No, we wanna splash!"

"Boys, for the love of–" Oliver choked as his mouth was filled with suds and water. His own blue eyes twinkled back at him from both olive faces.

"Im here, Im here. Jesus, Ollie," Caden helped him sit back on the toilet. "Next time, the dishes can wait. Here," he filled one of the Dixie cups on the sink and handed it to Oliver. "Rinse it out, okay? Ill hog-tie the rugrats."

"No, Daddy! No! Splash time!"

"I dont wanna! I wanna play!"

Both boys wailed as Caden took over, washing their hair and then scrubbing them clean. Once his mouth was soap-free, they drained the tub and dried their boys off.

"Can I wear my dinosaur jammies?" Donovan asked as Oliver scooped him up in his fluffy purple towel and carried him to the boys room. "I wanna be a T-rex and eat all the things!"

Oliver kissed him on the cheek and laughed. "Of course you can, sweetie. What about you, Julian? Any pajama requests?"

"Pretty princesses, so I can defeat dragons with my flamesword!"

"Sure thing," Caden agreed. "Those are my favorite. Theyve got Mulan and Tiana and Belle and all those awesome ladies on them."

They changed the boys into their pajamas and tucked them into their little twin beds. Caden picked out the Night Before Christmas and started to read as Oliver called his dads on his tablet. After a few rings, the screen blinked in.

"Hi Dad!"

Suddenly there were a handful of voices on the other side.

"Is that Oliver?"

"Ollie! Favorite big brother!"

"Liar, Evan is your favorite. Ollie is my favorite!"

"Kids," Papas voice hollered. His face appeared next to Dads. "Hey, kiddo. Hows the snow down there?"

"It stopped a few hours ago," Oliver said as he glanced out at the snow covered street. Manhattan was a soft, brilliant white tonight, the streets and sidewalks covered. He knew it wouldnt last for long here, but for now it was untouched and beautiful. "I bet its coming down up there."

"Twenty-six inches so far. Cole just checked," Dad said. "I wish you boys were all here. The house is so empty this year."

"Funny how its so empty, but its somehow louder than usual," Papa said with a pointed look over his shoulder. The shouts of laughter stopped. He turned back and smiled at Oliver. "Do we get to see our grandtwins before Santa comes?"

"Just a second. Theyre already falling asleep," Oliver stood up as Caden closed the book. Donovan and Julian were both dozing off now. Caden waved at the tablet and blew Dad and Papa a kiss. "Merry Christmas!"

They tucked the boys in snuggly, kissed them goodnight, and went to their own room. "Mmm, finally alone," Caden murmured as Oliver set his tablet down and started to pull his clothes off to change. A hand tugged at his jeans and a moment later theyd fallen down his hips. "Whoops, guess I should pick those up for you."

Oliver laughed softly as Cadens mouth made a wet trail down his stomach as he dropped to his knees. "Youre ridiculous."

"You love ridiculous."

"I did marry a Yankee who loves the Red Sox," Oliver reminded him. "It doesnt get much more ridiculous than that."

"Beth, I dont– god, why didnt you come get these?" Evan stared up and down the feminine products aisle at the grocery store. "I barely know the difference between pads and tampons."

His wife was silent, but it was a silence that meant she was glowering at him. "Yes, you do, Evan Michael. Dont act stupid just because our daughters vaginas are bleeding now."

Evan flinched at the phrasing but continued down the aisle, pausing next to a pair of women. They giggled at the sight of him and went back to comparing boxes of tampons. He stared from box to box, each with different sizes, designs, purposes. Why did all three of them have to start at once? They werent even the same ages.

"Look, Ive given Lizzie and Lyra a few of my panty liners for now. Maddies in the shower," Beth said calmly. "Get pads. Its their first periods, its best to keep it as simple as possible for them until theyre more comfortable."

"Okay, okay," Evan mumbled. He parked his cart on the other side of the aisle next to the shower gel and started looking. "Any particular type? Theres so many. God, this is like shopping for shoes."

"Pads," Beth repeated. "Get a few light, regular, and super-absorbent. I dont know what their flows will be like yet. Ones with the little velcro wings that hook underneath. They stay in place best."

Hot all over, Evan found the ones described and filled the entire cart. The cashier eyed him strangely as he ran the two-hundred dollar purchase through and then hurried outside with his fifteen bags of pads.

The drive back to their house was short and nice. Northern California was nice and warm almost all year round compared to New York and Boston. When he got home, Evan loaded all of the bags onto his arms, and hurried inside.

"Im back," he hollered. "Girls, Ive got, like, more pads than I thought existed."

Maddie appeared first in her bathrobe, her dark hair swinging and brown eyes dark. Clearly, she wasnt anymore thrilled than he was. She swiped a bag out of his hand and disappeared back upstairs.

Lizzie and Lyra trampled in from the living room. They looked like Beth and their biological grandmother, Quinn. All dirty blond hair, hazel eyes, and thin-limbed. His twins were too young to already be starting. Eleven was too young for periods, wasnt it? He wasnt sure. Maddie was thirteen at least. Lyra rubbed her belly and grimaced, but Lizzie was all smiles.

"Hi Daddy! Oh, thanks!" She grabbed her own bag and skipped off to the closest bathroom.

Lyra glowered as she tugged a third bag off his arm. "I didnt sign up for this crap," she said moodily. "Cant I just have boobs and hips without the pain and blood? I dont even want kids."

"I wish I could give that to you," Evan said helplessly. "Your mom has a bunch of Motrin upstairs if you need some. Like, the super awesome kind. And theres a heating pad in the hall closet up there."

"Thanks," she muttered. Then she kicked the first step with her sneaker and stomped upstairs.

Beth appeared with a cup of hot cocoa. "The boys and Iris are getting ready to watch Frosty," she said. "Lets leave the girls alone for a while, okay? First periods are never fun."

"I cant imagine how any period at all would be fun. Except the last one maybe. Or the thank god, Im not pregnant one," Evan said as they entered the kitchen. He dropped all of the bags onto the counter and Iris and Nic charged over, thinking hed brought take-out.

"Exactly how many did you buy?" Beth muttered. She scanned the counter as Iris and Nic climbed onto the bar stools.

"Dinner?" Nic bellowed as he grabbed a bag and then pulled a face. "Kotex? What are– oh, ew!"

Iris peered over his shoulder and frowned. "Im never having a period," she declared. "Never ever."

Evan tried not to groan in misery. Iris was ten. In another year, if she followed her biological sisters… Four teenage girls with periods all at once. Why had they ever decided to have child one after the other, and then adopt a trio of siblings in the same age range?

A crash from the living room was followed by Wawa, their Corgi, scampering away to the dining room.

"Max did it!"

"I did not! It was Damiens fault!"

The two boys dived at each other and tumbled off the couch as the fallen lamp flickered from its new home on the floor.

Beth blew out a frustrated breath and glared at him. The Christmas tree creaked and then fell over on top of their youngest two.

"Ouch!"

"Ugh, I hate pine needles!"

"Im so glad were tricking them all with coal this year," Evan said quietly.

Beth kissed his cheek and went roaring into the living room as the boys clambered to their feet. "Youre both about to be grounded for the rest of your break!"

"Mom! Dad! How do these things hook into my underwear?"

Evan closed his eyes at Maddies shout, then winced as he heard her door slam and her thundering footsteps. "Merry Christmas to us." He hurried upstairs to figure out how to help.

Kurt laughed loudly as Beth and Evan finished telling them about their evening.

"Oh, Im so glad we had four boys and one girl," he told them. "I dont think I could have handled so many periods at once. I remember that first year after Anna started. God, I thought Id wake up to her skinning us alive every couple of weeks."

Blaine stepped out of their bathroom, still brushing his teeth. "What?"

Kurt leaned the tablet towards his stomach. "Maddie, Lizzie, and Lyra all got their first periods earlier."

Blaine pulled a face and dribbled toothpaste down his chin. He disappeared back into the bathroom.

"How are the rest of our lovely grandkids?" Kurt asked.

Beth groaned and rolled away from Evans tablet. But Evan straightened his pillow and sat up a little more. "Max and Damien had another fight, knocked over the tree, and broke the lamp. So they arent speaking, just sending nasty paper airplane messages across the room to each other. Nic tried to eat a pad, then threw up, and Iris is determined to never have a period. I dont blame her."

Kurt laughed once more and settled down into Blaines side as his husband joined him in bed. "We warned you that seven was an insane number of children. Five, even with ages spread apart, was difficult."

"It was a nightmare with Anna and Cole. Always running off in the middle of the night to go to this show or that party," Blaine mumbled. "Im glad we had Evan and Ollie first. We could stand on our own feet thanks to you boys."

"Right, well, were doomed," Evan said miserably. "Theyre all insane."

"Take after you," Beth called from out of sight. "Ugh, cant they just go away to college already?"

"How was Xaviers semester?" Evan asked his dads. "Hes still doing pre-med right?"

"Yeah, hes fixed on it, but I think hell be a good doctor," Blaine said. "I never would have had the patience for it."

"And Cole? And Anna?"

"Annas about to pop, and refuses to stop writing her articles. As much as Im glad she loves her job, I do wish shed take a real break. Shes due in a few weeks," Kurt said. "Im sure shell have the baby before the first even though she swears shes due at the end of January. Cole is–"

"In love," Blaine beamed at the screen. "Completely in love with this one. Im sure of it."

"Cole?" Evan frowned at them as Beth rolled back towards the screen. "Sounds suspicious. He doesnt really do love."

"He doesnt know it yet," Blaine said. "So, shh, keep it secret."

"Will do," Evan said. He yawned and slid down under the covers more. "I miss being home for Christmas. Is it still snowing?"

Kurt nodded. "Almost three feet out there and still going."

"Wow, I miss the snow, but I dont, too."

"Im sure Blainell drag us all out there to play in the morning," Kurt said with a teasing smile at his husband.

Blaine stuck his tongue out and then kissed him wetly on the cheek.

"Well let you two get some sleep," Evan said. "I know its late there. Merry Christmas, we love you!"

Kurt ended the call and set his tablet aside. "You slobbered on my cheek and I just finished moisturizing."

"Aw, are you starting to get cute wrinkles, babe?" Blaine kissed his cheek again and then placed another at the crinkles at the corner of Kurts eye. "Youre perfect. I love seeing your wrinkles and gray hairs and your little belly. Reminds me of my own."

"Blaine Xavier Hummel-Anderson, I do not have gray hairs," Kurt said crossly. But Blaine hugged him close and pulled the covers up to their chins.

"You do and Ive been by your side long enough to see every single one. Theres even a few in your little beard right here." Blaine kissed the spot on his jaw and placed a second right on his lips.

Coles excited hollers woke Blaine and Kurt up the next morning.

"Three and a half feet! Its a winter wonderland!"

Kurt groaned and pressed his face into Blaines chest. "Do you think hell ever lose the enthusiasm?"

"I hope not," Blaine said. He kissed Kurts cheek and untangled himself from his husband. "You sleep. Ill go calm them all down."

Blaine stretched and found his pajamas where theyd been tossed last night. It was a little after seven when he entered the kitchen and found Jamie and Cole pulling on their snowboots and coats.

"Off to go sledding?"

"Hell yeah!" Cole yanked his hat on and raced outside. Jamie quickly followed and Blaine was left alone to make coffee and relax. After twenty minutes of watching the pair from the kitchen window, the phone rang. Blaine quickly answered it.

"Hello?"

"Hey, kiddo, Merry Christmas!"

Blaine grinned and retook his seat at the table. "Hey, Dad. Merry Christmas. Were all missing you two."

"Ah, were enjoying a quiet holiday at home," Burt said. "I love all of those grandkids and great-grandkids to death, but it does an old man good to have a quiet Christmas."

Blaine nodded and smiled. "Im sure me and Kurt will find out soon enough. Evan and Beth are having a field day, Im sure."

"Arent they always? Crazy kids. I could barely handle one," Burt said with a laugh. "Oh, Carole says hi. Have you two heard from that crazy brother of yours yet?"

"No, hes been quiet," Blaine said. "Im sure hell get around to calling all of us soon enough. You know how forgetful he is. We did get their Christmas card on time this year. The whole fridge is covered in cards. Evan, Oliver, Puck, Rachel, Mercedes. Makes me feel old."

"Hey, fifty-five is not old," said Burt. "Now when you reach seventy-seven, then youll be old. And Ill sit back and laugh at you."

Blaine smiled sadly and agreed. Burt was getting old, so was Carole. The thought that this year might be their last wasnt something he wanted to dwell on. Any year could be Burts last, and for years it had worried Kurt. But since his heart attack when they were in high school hed been surprisingly healthy. Thered been a small cancer scare one year when they were in college, but since then hed been in tip-top shape.

"Well come down for New Years," Blaine decided. "Once the snow clears and Cole heads out. Xavier and Anna can come, too."

"Shes due soon, isnt she?"

"Next month."

"You boys have done good for yourselves," Burt said after a moment. "Im so proud of you guys. Of all of you."

"Burt–"

"Hey, now, dont get that sad tone with me," Burt chided. "Im old, Blaine. I say sentimental things because Ive got nothing better to do. Except old people sex, but even that gets hard after seventy. Got it?"

Blaine closed his eyes and smiled anyway. "Somehow I dont think it gets hard, if you know what I–"

"Hush up," Burt snapped, but he laughed for a solid minute anyway.

"Ill have Kurt call when he gets up, okay?"

"Sure thing," Burt said. "Ill be making our call rounds to everyone. Love you, kiddo. Make sure you give Kurt and the kids a hug for me today. And call your sister. God knows I dont want her calling me and shouting because you havent answered your phone again."

"I will. I promise. I love you, Dad. Merry Christmas."