"Five? What do you mean five?"

Blaine wasnt sure if Kurt was going to start hyperventilating before him or not. Three months ago theyd been excited just to hear their surrogate was pregnant after six months of trying. Artificial insemination had been an option, but with advances in technology in recent decades few gay couples chose that route. Now they could combine their own DNA together, thanks to a breakthrough in 2026. It made implanting the embryo tougher, but their baby would genetically be theirs.

"It happens a lot," Doctor Gibbons explained. "We use several fertilized embryos because usually one out of a dozen take. In a lot of cases, as youve experienced over the last several months, none take."

"And youre telling us five took?" Kurt repeated. Blaine could see his eyes growing larger each second. His husband was thrilled to be a father, but having one single life in their hands was terrifying for both of them. Hearing that they would soon be the fathers of quintuplets hadnt even factored into their plans. Or bank account.

"Kurt, its– well, its a lot. It is," Blaine said, trying to calm Kurt and his own heart rate with his words. "But well figure it out?"

"How am I going to have the time to make outfits for five, Blaine?" Kurt demanded. His pupils had taken over his eyes, blown with absolute panic. "Or feed them? Or the diapers, Blaine. Were going to need an entire room just for diapers."

Blaine sat back as Kurt started taking deep breaths and the doctor started sliding pamphlets across his desk towards them. Their office would have to be cleaned out, everything sold, the piano could be auctioned to someone–or a new house. A bigger house. Their little three bedroom was cozy enough for them plus baby, but not them plus five babies.

"What about Jackie?" Kurts voice finally said. Blaine had become so lost in his thoughts and silent panic he hadnt even thought about their carrier. "Is she okay? Wont this be really difficult on her?"

"We have a multiples group in the area that weve given her contact information for," Doctor Gibbons explained. "And all the information Im giving you," he pointedly pushed the pamphlets towards them, "was given to her yesterday. Theres a definite chance of premature birth with any cases of multiples. Ive helped deliver dozens over the years, and I assure you I will be here every step of the way to make sure Jackie and the babies are in the least amount of danger possible."

They both nodded, asked a few more questions, and answered Jackies text messages that they hadnt understood an hour ago.

Are you guys mad?

No. Of course not. Just startled, but still thrilled.

Blaine sent the message as Dr. Gibbons stood. Kurt was wringing his hands and Blaine could already see his eyes starting to itch with the need to start counting sugar packets, or re-organizing their closet by fabrics and then colors. Hed done the same thing when Burt had gone in to have minor knee surgery three years ago.

"Happy Holidays and Ill see you and Jackie after the first of the year," Dr. Gibbons shook both of their hands. "Well talk more extensively then when we arent all rushing home for the holidays."

"You two look like youve been hit by a bus," Burt said when theyd all piled into his truck at the airport in Columbus.

Blaine and Kurt said nothing from the backseat. Their eyes were fixed forward, their hands joined in the space between them. Their grip was so tight it made Burts own hand ache. Burt glanced at Carole, who shrugged and glanced back at them, too. Theyd been weird since theyd landed. Shell-shocked. That was the best way Burt could think to put it.

"Guys?"

"Five," Blaine said dazedly. "What are we supposed to do with five babies?"

Burt and Carole frowned at each other.

"You boys arent starting a daycare business, are you? Cause I gotta tell you, youre gonna have your hands full enough with just one come June," Burt said.

"I think Im going to be sick," Kurt said weakly. He rolled the window down and threw up on the car parked next to them.

Carole was outside immediately, helping Kurt out and rubbing his back. Burt looked to Blaine for an answer.

"Jackie had her check up on Tuesday," Blaine said, his eyes still fixed on some point out the windshield. "Shes having quintuplets."

Burt could only gape at his son-in-law as Blaine opened his own door and threw up, too.

The drive home was tense. Carole hopped into the backseat with the boys, squeezing in between their trembling bodies and cradling one on each side. Burt tried to wrap his mind around what hed heard.

Quintuplets. Five babies. He was going from just Dad to Grandfather of Five.

Blaine and Kurt had been smart with their money since college, they could have easily supported themselves and twins, maybe even triplets. But five babies at once... it was unthinkable to him. Just Kurt had been more than he could handle thirty years ago. If all of the babies cried as much as his own son had, then Blaine and Kurt would die of sleep deprivation.

Together, Burt and Carole guided Kurt and Blaine into the house. They left the bags in the truck for now and forced two steamy mugs of hot chocolate towards them.

"We dont even have enough arms to hold five babies," Blaine was mumbling as Burt shoved him down into a seat at the kitchen table. "What if theyre all crying at once and we have to neglect one? How do we choose which one? Do we alternate or–"

"And strollers?" Kurt cut in as Carole finally got him to sit beside his husband. "Do they even make strollers for five?"

"We need a new car– a van or an Explorer or something with more seats," Blaine added, his hands digging into his gelled down hair. "Oh my god, oh my god..."

"We shouldnt have read those pamphlets on the flight," Kurt said hoarsely. "What if one of them doesnt survive? Theyll be born months early and their lungs and–"

"Guys!" Burts shout stopped their verbal spiral. He pushed Blaines mug into his shaking hands, and made Kurt raise his from the table. "Slow sips. Just relax. Theres plenty of time to figure this out. Were right here with you."

After theyd both finished off their first mugs, Burt filled them back up and Carole heated up leftovers from earlier in the week. It scared him to see his boys falling apart and panicking like this. Theyd waited and hoped for so long to have children of their own, and finally, theyd financially been able to after years of building towards it. Between the two of them everything had finally been perfect for welcoming a little baby into their cozy home outside the city.

"What are we going to do?" Kurt finally said when their mugs were empty again and Blaine was rubbing his temples in slow, measured circles.

"Youre going to help me get your bags out of the truck, carry them upstairs, then take a nice long nap," Burt ordered. "This is a lot and yeah, its scary as hell, but if I have to move in with you two for the first year, then I will. Youre going to have plenty of help with those grandbabies, okay?"

They both gave whoozy nods, did as Burt had instructed, and when Burt returned to the kitchen, Carole looked over at him.

"I think well both have to move in with them," she said.

"Oh my god, Dad," a girls voice said. "What do you mean you didnt buy us pads? Were all twelve now! You were supposed to know wed all start today! God!"

Five identical teenage girls all nodded in agreement. They glared back at Kurt with Blaines eyes and his frown, all holding up the same pair of ruined jeans and demanding pads, tampons–things hed never even thought about before.

"Girls, Im sorry–"

"We have names!"

"Peppermint!"

"Buttercup!"

"Marigold!"

"Pecan!"

"Sally!"

"Sally?" Kurt repeated with a grimace. Who on Earth had named his daughters such horrible things? "I– do you want to go with me to buy them? Im sorry, I dont know what Im–"

"Buy them?"

"Ugh, Dad."

"Oh my god, hes so useless."

"I wish we had a different father."

"Honestly, dont you know that the Period Fairy brings them?"

"The what?"

"Girls, Im home!" The front door of their tiny little house open and Blaine came twirling in wearing a gaudy tutu and fairy wings. "Ive brought everything your vaginas will ever need–"

Kurt woke up screaming. Beside him, Blaine was already calming himself down from his own nightmare.

"Woah, Kurt, hey, shh, its okay," Blaine pulled Kurt against his chest and rubbed his back. "Shh, I had a nightmare, too, its okay."

"They were– five daughters and you were the Period Fairy and I dont know the difference between pads and tampons and–"

"Shh," Blaine cupped Kurts face and kissed him softly on the mouth. It took Kurt a few moments to press back, but he finally did. "I dreamt we had five boys and they all wanted paint guns. Finn bought them and they chased me around in my underwear and shot at me..."

"Oh my god," Kurt muttered. "Were going to drive ourselves crazy before theyre even born."

They sunk back down in Kurts old bed in his old room, Kurt curled up at Blaines side and their fingers tangled together. For a while, they just laid there and said nothing.

"You know, we get to see five first smiles," Kurt said suddenly. "And five first steps."

"And five little people growing up to be individuals," Blaine said. "Thats important. Even if theyre all identical, we have to let them know they arent a unit."

"We definitely need to know the sexes as soon as possible," Kurt decided. "What if we ended up with all these dresses or something and have five boys?"

"Maybe our boys will like dresses," Blaine said with a laugh. "I dont see a problem with that."

"You know what I mean," Kurt said, sitting up and giving him a weak glare. "Just for the sake of picking names, I think we need to know."

"Or we could pick neutral names," Blaine said. "If we can think up five neutral names."

"Ten, unless were not doing middle names."

"Ten, right," Blaine agreed as Kurt rested his head on his chest again. "God, we cant ever do anything the simple way, can we?"

"Devon," Kurt murmured.

"Are you going to start calling me by my middle name again? Cause that was just role-play."

"No, I mean, one name is Devon," Kurt said. "Ive always liked your middle name. Devon Hummel-Anderson."

"We could use yours, too, Kurt Evan," Blaine replied.

"Evan is not neutral."

"Sure it is, Evan Rachel Wood from Across the Universe," Blaine said.

Kurt agreed after a moment and they continued to think of names, from Ashley ("Kurt, thats rarely neutral in America") all the way down to Zaiden ("No, Blaine, thats a horrible, travesty of a name").

"So Devon, Colby, Jamie, Lynn, and Evan."

Kurt hummed and pressed a kiss to Blaines chest. "Do you really think we can do this?"

"I think we can do anything together," Blaine said as he curled his fingers into Kurts hair. "Well figure it out."

At thirty-three weeks and five days, their five little babies were born via caesarean section. Jackie had been incredible throughout it all, staying in best for over two months, letting them visit her constantly and be there for her as her stomach continued to grow. At one point, Kurt had been sure just touching her belly when make it combust, but getting to feel their babies kicking had gotten him past the fear. They were surprised to find that all five were very healthy, though they all needed special care for their lungs to grow stronger for several weeks.

Finally, in mid-June, just in time for Fathers Day, little Colby, the smallest of their family, was ready to leave the NICU and they could all go home for the first time. Burt and Carole where there to help (along with the custom-made stroller Burt had an old friend make for them) and finally, finally, all five were strapped into their car seats and heading home for the first time in their lives.

Kurt drove and Blaine kept an anxious eye on the two rows on car seats behind them. Devon behind Kurt, Lynn behind him, and little Colby in the middle and the easiest to reach. Behind them, Evan and Jamie, their little knitted hats Kurt had made just visible, were snoozing quietly.

"How long do you think itll be before all seven of us are sobbing?" Blaine whispered excitedly. Kurt rolled his eyes but smiled. He was thrilled to have all of their babies with them, safe and healthy.

"I give it forty-eight hours," Kurt said as he pulled into the driveway of the home theyd bought in March. It was a lot bigger, enough that all five of their kids could someday have their own rooms if necessary, and situated in Port Chester. They were outside of the city and right along the state line between Connecticut and New York.

Unloading was a struggle neither of them had expected. Carole wanted pictures with all of them and of every little thing, but finally they were inside. The carriers had filled up the couch and the love seat, and Kurt, Blaine, Carole, and Burt were left standing there cooing.

"Oh, I dont know who to hold first," Carole gushed. "Im so glad theyre all finally home."

Burt grunted and stepped towards the carrier closest to him. "Im going for this cutie pie first," he said. He scooped the baby up and smiled wider than Kurt had ever seen. "Hi there, Lynn. Im your Grandpa. Yes, I am. Yes, I am!"

Carole scooped up Devon and started cooing, too. "Im glad you have these little caps with their names," she said. "I dont know how youre going to tell them apart for these first few months."

"Their hospital bracelets are still on," Blaine said as he handed Evan and Colby to Kurt. "Soon enough Im sure well know their little quirks. Wont we, Jamie?" he scooped the baby up and adjusted the little cap. Jamies had green stripes. All five were white, with one colored stripes and long trailing points. They reminded Blaine of Santa Clause hats, but knitted and fur-less.

"Theyre all so quiet," Carole whispered as she swayed with Devon. "I wish Finn had been this quiet when Id first brought him home."

"I think theyre all too busy growing to bother with crying a lot," Kurt said. "Even in the hospital they were quiet unless they needed a change or food."

A high wail started from Burts arms. A moment later, Colby and Devon followed, and suddenly all five were crying at once.

"Oh, you two are going to spend the next eighteen years eating your own words," Burt laughed.