Kurt kept clutching Blaine’s hand, sobbing into it. A tiny part of his brain knew that he should move, that he had to get away from the body so that the gamemakers could remove it from the arena, but he wasn’t sure he could move. He wasn’t sure if he could do anything ever again, because Blaine wasn’t there to flash him a brilliant smile, and Blaine would never laugh again and nothing seemed to make sense anymore. Kurt lost sense of time, just clutching onto Blaine. He was sure the gamemakers were getting pissed by now, and that the Capitol audience would be bored and he knew that he had to get out of the house and away from Blaine before they sent something after him which destroyed Blaine in the process. Kurt tried to sit up, unsuccessful at first, but slowly he managed to sit up. He didn’t let go of Blaine’s hand, because letting go would be accepting and he couldn’t, wouldn’t, do that. Kurt blinked, trying very hard to see Blaine, but it was is if his eyes had forgotten how to see. And then it came into focus. Blaine, his Blaine, lying in a puddle of his own blood, a spear sticking out of his body. Kurt wanted to scream, to punch someone, kill someone, hug Blaine, tell him that it was going to be okay, but it was never going to be okay again because Blaine wasn’t in the world. Kurt glanced over at him again, and he felt himself losing a grip on reality. Was there even a reality anymore? Blood had somehow stopped flowing out of Blaine’s body, and was now just trickling slowly. Kurt watched it for a couple of seconds before he shut his eyes tightly, and kissed Blaine’s forehead, taking in the way his one love looked for the last time. Blaine was still, his eyes closed, his face smudged with dirt and tears. He looked so indescribably beautiful and strong, and yet so broken, cold and dead. Dead.

Kurt ran.

He ran through the streets, heading for the exact place where he knew she’d be waiting, where he knew he could find her.

This was the only thing he could think of, the only thing that even remotely made sense to him. He had to do this, not only for himself, but for Blaine, for his Blaine. Nothing seemed worth it anymore, and he supposed nothing was, because Blaine, brilliant, beautiful, wonderful Blaine wasn’t alive anymore. But even so, he knew there were lives to be saved, lives that could be made better if he lost. Every year his family had watched the games, each placing bets on who they thought the winner would be, cheering when the other’s guesses were killed in brutal combat or Gamemakers obstacles. They had made a game out of it all, been completely numb to the torture going on. Kurt’s mind barely ever thought of their families, but when he did, he just figured they were all going to be like Kurt’s. Supportive of the games, willing for their children to go forward and fight. But they weren’t trained. He wasn’t really aware of how little they were prepared for it until he met Blaine.

Blaine.

He kept running, he had to get to her. When he reached the outside, he decided to yell in.

“Quinn?!”

No response.

“Quinn, I need you to kill me.” He tried again, tears still falling on his wet cheeks, but he ignored them. He had more important things to focus on, or even more important things to ignore. He hiccupped through another sob and began clutching at his stomach as he fell to the ground.

“Quinn...”

“...Kurt?” She asked timidly, edging around the doorframe.

“Help me.” He pleaded, fresh tears falling from his eyes as his body wracked with another sob.

“I...I don’t...” she started, looking down confused at the boy on the floor, his hands covered with blood and dirt.

“Please, kill me.” He begged.

“Why?”

“I loved him so much.” He was crying again, holding his stomach as best as he could. “It was too late...”

“What was too late?” Quinn asked, bending down next to him and risking a hand on his back. Kurt didn’t seem to turn on her or show any signs of hurting her, so she rubbed small circles.

“He’s dead.” Kurt cried out.

“B-Blaine?”

Kurt nodded harshly, literally holding himself together with his own arms. Those should be Blaine’s arms, his mind told him, and that thought alone brought on a fresh wave of tears.

“It’s just us.” He managed to say, looking up at her through tired, watery eyes. “And you need to kill me.”

“Kurt...”

“No.” Kurt immediately protested. “I don’t want to win this. You need to go home, and tell his parents I loved him.”

Quinn nodded reluctantly and Kurt dragged the ring off of his finger.

“Give this to them.” He passed the ring to Quinn, but she took it with a small smile.

“Keep it.” She said sadly, placing it back into his palm. “His dad gave him it. Told him to give it to the person he falls in love with. He wanted you to have it.”

Kurt looked down to the ring in his hand and slid it back onto his finger. His mind flashed back to when Blaine gave it to him. Long before Kurt realised he had feelings for him, Blaine must’ve known. He was prepared to give something that meant so much to not only him, but he family, just to a boy that he’d met a few days before. He was willing to give Kurt everything.

“He loved you when we watched your interview.” Quinn said with a smile. “I know he did. He didn’t want to talk about you, but his eyes lit up whenever we watched it.”

Kurt let out a small smile. “I loved him too.”

“You love him, too.” Quinn corrected.

He just nodded, his fingers running over the ring. “I love you too,” he mumbled.

Quinn moved to sit on the ground, her knees tight up to her chest.

“Did he kill anyone?” She asked quietly.

“No.” Kurt replied instantly. “No. He’s too good to kill anyone.”

“Did you?”

Kurt nodded. “Yeah. Which is why I never deserved him.”

“You love him.” She shrugged. “That’s enough for me.”

A small tear dropped from Kurt’s eye and he pushed himself to stand up. “Please, can we do this? I don’t want to be a part of this anymore.”

Quinn nodded but then looked at him curiously. “How? I mean...I’ve never killed anyone.”

Kurt thought for a moment. “Have you been to the pond?” Quinn shook her head. “Santana showed me it when I was with her yesterday, come on, I have an idea.”

-

“Hold me under, I don’t care how long it takes, do not let go until I’m dead.” Kurt instructed. He wasn’t crying anymore, he was just very exact about his instructions. He wondered how Blaine would feel about this, before quickly throwing the thought away. He couldn’t lose it until he was underwater.

“I don’t know if I can...” she admitted softly.

“You can. You’re strong.” He assured her, brushing her hair behind her ear. “Please? Not for me. For Blaine.”

She nodded shakily and Kurt climbed into the water until it was up to his ears. Quinn followed him out.

“Thank you. Congratulations, victor.” He smiled, tapping the end of her nose playfully. She grinned back and then placed her hands on his shoulders.

“On three.” Kurt said.

“One.”

“Two.”

Together they said, “Three.” And he was plunged under the water. He let himself think of Blaine then, let himself truly mourn and remember him. It was the last thing he did, but he didn’t mind, because Blaine was worth it. He was worth it all.

Three minutes later, a cannon fired.