Finals week loomed, though Blaine wasn’t that concerned about most of his classes. Most of his classes didn’t have actual exams, just papers. It helped keep the stress down, but it meant at least the same amount of work – if not more.

The only two things weighing on his mind were his audition and his presentation for his Relationships and Dialogues class. He had finally settled on what pieces to play, after much deliberation and help from Kurt, so that wasn’t a problem. It was just the matter that he was going to sit down and play for people and it actually meant something. It wasn’t just him playing for fun, playing for someone to listen because they wanted to – it was for a purpose, and the most important purpose he could think of.

“You should play the Bach.”

“But I don’t like the Bach. It’s boring – all technique and no heart. Like Bach.”

“Technique, though. Besides, you’re supposed to play two pieces that contrast each other. So you can seriously make up for how clinical it is with your other one.”

“What did we narrow the other down to?”

“Mozart, Beethoven, Chopin.”

“You choose, I’ll play whatever. I’m just so tired of trying to pick.” It was true, he’d spent so much time going over the possibilities with Dr. Salido and then all the time afterward thinking about what he was going to do. He was comfortable with any of them, just not comfortable with choosing any of them.

“No, that won’t work. What do you enjoy playing the most?”

“Beethoven,” he answered honestly, not hesitating at all.

“Why?”

“Well I know they said to try and choose something from a standard sonata,” Blaine began, mulling it over in his head as he spoke. “No matter what I choose, it’ll be that. Beethoven though, I think it’d be a good contrast to Bach. Lots of feeling and more me.” Never mind the fact that Beethoven had always been his favorite – he felt like he couldn’t really go wrong if he went with it. Plus that’s what he’d been playing when Dr. Salido first found him, and he couldn’t deny the existence of fate.

Because Kurt.

“Which sonata?”

“Appassionata, the first movement.”

“That sounds perfect,” Kurt said, and Blaine wasn’t sure if he was talking about the choice of piece or how it actually sounded when he played it. It didn’t matter – either way, they were decided.

Even trickier than all that was his presentation.

There was something to be said about open ended assignments being more difficult than those with closed parameters. When Dr. Birk had first gone over the final project with them, it had sounded amazing. Put together a five to eight minute Powerpoint presentation about a topic of your choice, the only caveat being that it needs to be about some form of interpersonal relationship and tie in somehow to what we’ve talked about in class. We’ll present them during our exam time during finals week. It sounded easy – just choose a topic and go for it.

Choosing a topic was harder than Blaine had thought. It wasn’t like he’d waited until the last minute, either. The whole assignment had been explained to them weeks before Thanksgiving, in order to give them a good amount of time to put it together, but he hadn’t been able to settle on what to do until after the holiday. That had given him two weeks to get it done, but that was on top of all the other work he had to do – final papers, practicing, everything.

Dr. Birk had told him he didn’t need to make a Powerpoint, he could just make a speech if he wanted, but he didn’t think that was fair. He understood the reasoning, obviously, but he knew what he wanted to do. All he did was check with her that it was okay for him to get some help putting it together – his words, ideas, thoughts on the slides, just with help on the formatting end of things – and he was good to go.

Santana and Kurt were the people he went to for help, and he needed both of them for what he was doing. It was weird, a little crazy, to have them both helping with separate halves that would eventually become the one final whole, but there were reasons. Well, the one very good reason that he didn’t want either of them to know he was doing it about them. It wasn’t like he was going to have a lot of slides, just enough for what he needed, so it didn’t take much time for them to help him out – and then less than five minutes with Brittany to join the two together.

The Powerpoint itself was done a week before finals. Blaine had wanted to make sure it was completed and ready before he was done figuring out what he was going to say, because that was the part he didn’t have complete control over – his words he could figure out on his own at his leisure. Little by little it came together, because he wanted to make sure he chose the right words, the perfect words.

It was bound to be a stressful day – his presentation was right before his audition and both made him nervous. That was why he’d spent his Sunday, the day before it all, trying to relax as much as possible. He hadn’t let himself practice, forced himself to stay away from pianos and music, not even listening to anything because he thought it might psych him out. Mostly he needed distraction, and that was what Kurt did best.

There wasn’t much that could take Blaine’s mind of everything else quite like Kurt. Sitting, talking, cuddling, it didn’t matter. Kurt simply being there was enough. Thankfully, he somehow managed not to have any finals on the first day of the week like Blaine did. That meant he was free to be there all night, and he’d assured Blaine that he would be there when he auditioned. He knew once he started playing he would be fine, it was just the getting to that point part that was concerning.

Knowing he would be fine didn’t stop him from being slightly anxious, even when he was lying in bed next to Kurt. That anxiety slowly melted away with the feeling of Kurt’s fingers running through his still damp, gel free hair. There was something to be said about the way Kurt would twine his curls around his fingertips, as if trying to form them better, and then let them go. It was methodical, repetitive, and soothing.

“You’re going make me fall asleep,” Blaine murmured, his head lolling to the side.

“So fall asleep.”

“Don’t want to fall asleep, want to kiss you.”

“So kiss me.”

Blaine reached up to pull Kurt’s hand from his hair, brushing his lips against his knuckles as he brought it down. He peppered the back of his hand with light kisses before letting it go and gently nudging him onto his back. Shifting over, he pressed a short, chaste kiss against his lips before scooting in a little closer and tracing along the side of his face with his fingertips.

He never really could get over the strong line of Kurt’s jaw, how it almost seemed to contrast with his soft (really soft) skin. His thumb rubbed against it for a lingering moment before he leaned down and trailed kisses along it, starting back at the hinge by his ear and working his way up to his chin – then over to the other side to do the same there too. Kurt’s breath was quickening by the time he reached his mouth, and his fingers tangled up into the back of Blaine’s hair as he pulled him down to kiss him deeply

Not fighting it at all, Blaine cupped Kurt’s face in his hands, fingers holding it in place as his thumbs stroked over his cheekbones and his tongue made its way into his mouth. There was nothing frantic or needy about it – it was almost on the verge of lazy, the slow and studious way he let himself explore. Kurt wasn’t a mystery to him, and he was very familiar with every facet of his mouth, but that didn’t stop it from being wonderful to be able to kiss him like that.

By the time he pulled back, they were both breathless. Kurt’s fingers loosened their hold on his curls and his hands slid down to his shoulders. He didn’t want to stop, though, not even to take a moment to catch his breath, so he ducked his head down and kissed along his neck. Kurt’s breath hitched as he grazed his teeth against his skin, and it wasn’t like he needed any encouragement but that definitely gave him some. So did the way Kurt was raking his shirt up his back.

It was always nice when they were all changed and ready for bed, the ease of t-shirts and pajama pants as opposed to their normal attire. Amazing what a difference it made when there was just simple layers of soft cotton or flannel between them as opposed to the methodically planned outfits that took time to shed. He sat up to let Kurt pull his shirt up over his head, and then pushed Kurt’s shirt up his torso, fingertips dragging against his skin and feeling the muscles jump and tense beneath them.  

Once both their shirts were off, Blaine shifted over and sat straddling Kurt’s lap. He ran his hands down Kurt’s chest, pads of his thumbs lingering in light circles over his nipples and making his breath catch. His fingers splayed out as his hands traveled further down, and he leaned in to press open mouthed kisses along his sternum and up to his neck. Kurt’s hands gripped onto his hips, fingers digging in lightly as his hips rolled up against him.

“Kurt…” Blaine breathed out, tilting his hips forward a little to angle them better and groaning softly as they rocked together. He buried his face against the crook of his neck and latched his mouth onto his skin, sucking softly and running his tongue over it. Kurt’s arms twined around him, fingertips trailing up his back and resting against his shoulders, little breathy sounds making their way from his mouth. “Wanna feel you…”

“Can’t you?” Kurt murmured, tilting his head to the side to give Blaine better access to his neck as he pressed his hips up extra hard against him. That, plus the fact that Blaine hadn’t even realized he’d said the words out loud at first, shorted his brain out for a few seconds. He hadn’t meant to say, he’d just been thinking it, but since it was out there it wasn’t like he shouldn’t keep going.

“No not that, I mean yes I can,” he mumbled, fighting the blush that he knew was creeping up his neck. It wasn’t like they hadn’t talked about it, because they had, it was just very difficult to put his thoughts into words when he could feel the hard length of his boyfriend’s cock pressed against his hip. He dropped another lingering kiss against his neck and then lifted up to press their foreheads together. “I want to feel… all of you.”

Kurt’s hips stilled and he made a soft sound. Blaine wasn’t entirely sure if it was one of surprise or of understanding. His grip definitely tightened on Blaine’s shoulders, but that could have been either good or bad – there wasn’t much of a way to tell from that alone. He gave it a few seconds, and then a few more, and he tried very hard not to panic. This was Kurt, there was no reason to freak out. Kurt. “Kurt?”

“Yes,” Kurt said, his hands sliding down to Blaine’s hips again. “Sorry, yes… I was just, I don’t have… anything…”

“I do,” Blaine said, biting his lip.

“You do?” Kurt definitely sounded surprised that time.

“Yeah, Cooper…” Blaine flushed a little, thinking back to that high embarrassing day. “Cooper decided to be helpful and give me condoms and lube back when I moved in here. It was really awkward.”

“I can’t even imagine,” he murmured, his thumbs rubbing against Blaine’s skin. “Where is it?”

“I can get it.” He shifted over off of him, stretching up the bed and reaching for his bedside table. It was all stuck down in the bottom of the drawer – he’d stuck it there right after Cooper had given it to him. His fingers fumbled as he dug, but it didn’t take long for him to find it. Kurt wasn’t helping him concentrate, the way his fingers kept walking their way along his side and then down his back all the way to play with the top of his pajama pants.

“Got it?” Kurt asked, leaning back once Blaine sat up, and he nodded. He dropped them onto the bed and moved back to kneel between Kurt’s legs, kissing him deeply and sucking on his lower lip a little as he ran his hands down his sides, fingertips dipping under the waistband of his pants. His heart was racing, pounding hard in his chest as he tugged off Kurt’s pajama pants and boxers, running his hands up his bare legs once he’d worked them off his ankles.

“You’re… sure?”

“I want to feel all of you,” Kurt replied, and Blaine’s breath hitched.

Kurt was the one who got the lube open, taking Blaine’s hand and putting it on his fingers. Blaine sat back on his heels, feeling like his chest was going to burst as he carefully trailed his fingers back along Kurt’s perineum. He leaned down, kissing his stomach as he listened to the quiet moan breaking from his boyfriend’s throat as he traced back to the puckered skin.

They both gasped, and Blaine bit his lip as he slowly rubbed circles around his asshole. He breathed hard against Kurt’s stomach as he gently pressed the tip of his finger inside, oh it felt so tight, and Kurt whimpered. It was different than any whimper Blaine had heard from him before, much more wanting and borderline desperate as his finger worked into him.

The whimpers turned into moans when a second finger slid in, and Blaine kissed up Kurt’s torso to his chest. He couldn’t get over how it felt, the way Kurt’s muscles were clenching around his fingers – and they were going to be doing that to his cock before too long and that thought alone was enough to make him groan. His free hand moved up, wrapping around Kurt’s cock and stroking it slowly in rhythm with his fingers.

“Blaine, more, please,” Kurt whined, his hips jerking back and forth – down onto Blaine’s fingers, up into his fist, over and over. Blaine rest his forehead against his chest and hesitated for a moment before adding a third finger, taking in the deep moan that ripped itself from Kurt’s chest. It felt more natural by that point, the way his fingers worked in and out of him, pressing in deep and dragging on their way out, pulling all kinds of sounds out of him.

It wasn’t long before Kurt was pushing at his shoulders, getting him to stop. At first Blaine thought he’d done something wrong, but then there was the sound of the condom wrapper ripping. His mouth dropped open as Kurt rolled the condom onto him, and the even strokes of his hand as it spread the lube on made him fall forward onto his hands, pressing into the mattress on either side of him.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” he whispered, his only real fear about the situation coming tumbling out of his mouth as he found himself with the tip of his cock pressed against Kurt’s entrance.

“You won’t, I trust you,” Kurt murmured, hands running up Blaine’s arms and squeezing his biceps. “Promise.”

Blaine nodded, pressing in slowly and finding it really hard to keep going slow once the head of his cock was past that tight ring of muscle. His hands tightened in the sheets of the bed and he stopped, and Kurt’s hands gripped onto his arms tightly. Even just stalled, staying still as he felt the tightness around his cock and listened to Kurt breathe sharply, it was the best feeling he’d ever experienced in his life.

“Okay,” Kurt whimpered. “You can move.”

“Okay,” Blaine repeated, his voice a strained whisper as he kept his arms braced and he carefully thrust in a little more before pulling back, whining as he felt the dragging tightness against him with every movement. He felt dizzy, the perfect feeling of Kurt all around him completely overwhelming in every way he hadn’t ever imagined. Every little thrust into him was better than the last, and he didn’t think he was hurting him; at least it didn’t seem like it from the quiet keens coming from beneath him. “You okay?”

“Perfect.” Kurt’s hips rocked down to meet him and Blaine moaned, pushing in deeper and dropping his head down, his chin hitting his chest.

“You feel so good, Kurt,” he whimpered, knowing that the words didn’t even come close to what he meant. Kurt didn’t feel good – he felt amazing, wonderful, perfect, like heaven. Blaine just didn’t have the ability to put any of that into words with how hot and tight Kurt felt around him.

“So do you, Blaine, so good.” Blaine leaned in so he could kiss him, their mouths meeting for a brief moment before Kurt let out a soft cry.

“Oh God, sorry,” Blaine said, quickly pulling back but stopping when Kurt’s hands scrambled to bring
him back again.

“Don’t be sorry,” Kurt said breathily, hands running down and pressing into the dimples of his lower back. “Felt good.”

As Blaine thrust back into him, he knew he wasn’t going to last very much longer. All the time he’d spent fingering him, he’d been teetering on the edge before he’d begun – and the fact that Kurt felt so perfect was pushing him closer, and fast. The fact that Kurt was encouraging, it made him not worry about hurting him. This was Kurt – he wasn’t going to hurt him, intentionally or otherwise.

He felt Kurt shift, then heard the familiar sound of skin sliding on skin and he could feel the backs of Kurt’s knuckles grazing against his stomach as his hand fisted over his cock. If he hadn’t been so close already, that would have made sure of it. He could feel his body trembling as he struggled to keep his weight up off Kurt, the steady thrusts of his hips building the tension even more.

Kurt gave a shout as he came, and the feeling of him tensing and clenching around him was more than enough to finish Blaine off. He moaned, biting his lip hard, and dropped down onto his forearms as he fought with himself to try and remember how to breathe. Moving wasn’t an option, at least not right away – he wasn’t even sure if he could if he wanted to. He nosed his way along Kurt’s jaw until he made his way to his mouth, kissing him sloppily but he didn’t care.

“Mmphh,” Kurt mumbled against his mouth, sucking on his lower lip before pulling back and huffing out a breath. “Need a second.”

“Me too,” Blaine whispered, pressing a kiss against his cheek and staying like that for a few long seconds before feeling like he should move. He slowly shifted back, pulling out of him and letting out a low whine as soon as he felt the lack of Kurt surrounding his dick. Kurt didn’t seem thrilled either, hissing softly and squirming against the bed. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Mkay.” Kurt dragged his fingertips up Blaine’s back, but let his hands drop away as he moved off the bed.

Blaine stumbled his way to the bathroom, unsteady on his feet. He got rid of the condom and grabbed a washcloth, getting it damp and cleaning himself off before making his way back to his room and up onto the bed. Kurt hadn’t moved, or at least it didn’t seem like it, and Blaine carefully wiped him off, getting as much come and lube off as he could manage.

“C’mere,” Kurt murmured once he was done, dropping the washcloth down onto the floor and pulling Blaine down tight against his chest. They were a mess of sweaty limbs and still uneven breath, but there wasn’t much more comforting or warm than being held in close against Kurt when they were both naked and worn out beyond words. Blaine hadn’t ever thought that he could be as comfortable with someone as to be like that, but it wasn’t surprising that it was true with Kurt.

That was how he knew the next day was going to be just fine.

***

Routine was what kept Blaine from being a nervous wreck. He and Kurt had woken up, showered, gotten ready (Blaine knew to dress nicely for an audition but apparently what wore on a regular basis was fine, according to Kurt), and gone straight to Java Central. Coffee, biscotti, and Kurt – the best way to start the day, guaranteed to start it off right.

The exam time for Relationships and Dialogues was from nine to eleven, which hadn’t exactly been a thrill for anyone. Dr. Birk had informed them that they were lucky it hadn’t been the seven o’clock time slot, because the likelihood of anyone staying awake through the presentations – herself included – would have been slim. As it was, they were lucky to have it on the first day and get it over with, so everyone would be free to focus on other things thereafter. At least, that was the optimistic way to look at it.

Blaine had convinced Kurt to come with him. He’d said it under the pretense of having him keep an eye on Roscoe for when he had to do his presentation, but that wasn’t it. Kurt hadn’t seemed to believe that was the reason, but Blaine figured he was more likely to think it was just to keep him from being nervous. It wasn’t like public speaking was one of his strong suits, after all. That still wasn’t it.

Kurt didn’t seem to mind; after all it had been one of his favorite classes the year prior. He’d greeted Dr. Birk when they got to the classroom, and Blaine had double checked that she’d gotten his Powerpoint. She’d offered to get it set up for him once it was his turn to go, so all he had to do was click a button to make the slides switch. He’d spent so much time working on it, so much time thinking about them, he knew exactly what each one had and how it went with what he was going to say. At least, he hoped he did.

“Alright, has everyone had their coffee so they can stay awake?” Dr. Birk asked as the last of the students filed in and made their way to their seats. Kurt sat behind Blaine, feet resting on the back rungs of his chair like a reminder he was there. “Let’s get started! I’ll take volunteers, but if no one offers themselves up then I’ll just have to start calling on people randomly. Everyone has to go, so no need to be shy.”

There were presentations about romantic relationships, presentations about abusive relationships, and everything in between. Blaine sat listening, waiting. A lot of the connections people were making with the material they’d covered in class were very loose connections, which made him feel a little better about his. He knew his nerves were going to get worse the longer he sat, but that still didn’t do anything to make him want to jump up and volunteer.

Except that it got to the point where it didn’t matter if he was ready or not, because he was the only person left.

“Hi, I’m Blaine,” he said, once he was up in front of the class, fingertips resting on the arrows of the keyboard for the computer. “I tried to make this as coherent as possible but I kept thinking of more stuff I wanted to say, so… sorry in advance.” He shrugged, a slightly apologetic smile tugging at the corners of his mouth as he pulled up the first slide.

[A picture of the Anderson family.]

“Families are something special. You have the one you’re born into, or adopted into, or fostered into, and that is your family. There’s never an expectation that there should be love, it’s just a given. Of course parents should love their children, and kids their parents in return. It’s almost like an adoration, the way family members feel about each other – it’s natural. Of course sometimes there are disappointments, moments of emotion that lead to things being said that aren’t entirely meant, but at the end of the day it’s still love.”

“Families aren’t always biological, or the standard makeup of parents and children. There are different types. There’s always that family you never expect, the one that catches you off-guard when it appears – a family of friends.”

[A picture of Brittany, Santana, Kurt, and Blaine.]

“Before this semester started, if you’d told me that I would be standing here today saying these things, I never would have believed you. Like I said, they sneak up on you. It’s those people you spend more time with than anyone else. You live with them, eat with them, spend every waking hour around one or another, and it’s something that almost feels like it might surpass the bond of your actual family because these are people that chose you, or you chose, not just people you were born to.”

[A picture of Santana curled up on the couch with Blaine.]

“Just like with your actual family, there are bound to be problems. Communication is a big part that often gets skipped over, and that’s where a lot of problems start. With a family of friends, there isn’t that underlying link of blood or overarching relationship holding you together, though, and that could cause doubt. How are people supposed to know how you feel if you don’t tell them? You could always show them. Even the littlest show of affection means something, but it doesn’t always make up for the words that aren’t being said.”

“It doesn’t always have to be something big, it really depends on the person. Some people only need a few words, a reassurance, an anchor to hold onto.”

[A picture of Kurt and Blaine’s hands, fingers linked together.]

“Other might need something more – a convincing gesture or proof that they’re really wanted.”

[A video clip, sound muted, from Santana singing to Brittany at karaoke.]

“In the end, as long as people are willing to talk, willing to communicate, those families can stay held together through the love involved.”

[A stock picture of two people sitting at a table, hands linked, staring at each other.]

“Love is different things to different people. Sometimes it’s easy. When you meet that person and you instantly know that no one else could possibly come close to making them feel the way they do. When every time you touch it’s like sparks shoot through you, and every time you kiss it’s full out fireworks – no matter how many times it happens, always the same. It’s not just about the physical, it’s about how they make you feel. When the simplest of words can turn a bad day into the best day. Like you could take over the world if they believed you could. How absolutely anything feels possible so long as they’re right there by your side.”

[A picture from a Pride Festival.]

“I’ve never understood how love could make people angry, especially when it doesn’t involve them. Who I love is my choice, it shouldn’t affect anyone but me and the other person involved. I’ve never understood how something that is supposed to be so pure and full of joy can be darkened by other people and their hate, based solely on body parts and gender. It’s a difficult concept to grasp, the fact that there are people out there who hate me just because I’m gay.”

“There’s so much more to me than that, just like there’s so much more to me than being blind. Those are small pieces of the bigger puzzle that is Blaine.”

“Those articles that we read, the ones about marriage equality and discrimination, those were what really got to me. I knew about it all before, but it felt so much more to have it there in front of me in writing, telling me about how there are people out there who consider my love to be lesser compared to theirs, simply based on who I love. My relationships have no direct impact on anyone else’s except the other people involved, so why does it seem like so many people feel like they should get to impact it?”

“I know what it feels like to be completely and utterly in love, and for the life of me I cannot understand why anyone would find something that feels that amazing to be bad.”

His mouth felt dry by the time he finished, and his heart was racing. The light applause from his classmates, echoing around the room just as it had at the end of every presentation, steeled him slightly as he made his way back to his seat and slid into it. Dr. Birk made her closing comments, about how she would email them her evaluations and how much she’d appreciated hearing everything they had to say – not just then but throughout the whole semester.

Blaine barely heard any of it. The buzz of all the students getting up from their seats, gathering their things, it didn’t even register with him. He got up, turning to say something to Kurt – because really he should address how he’d just professed that he was in love with him in front of his entire class – but he didn’t get any further than starting to open his mouth before Kurt’s arms were tight around him and their lips were pressed firmly together.

“I love you,” Kurt murmured, his fingers tightening briefly into the back of the vest Blaine was wearing. “I love you so much, Blaine.”

“I love you too,” Blaine said softly, a light thrill running through him at how those words sounded rolling off his tongue.

“I kind of got that impression.” Kurt pressed another kiss against his lips before pulling away, hand sliding down Blaine’s arm and into his own. “I’ll never get tired of hearing you say it, though.”

“You say that now,” Blaine teased, nudging him lightly before reaching down for Roscoe. “But I’ll bet you change your tune after the first week.”

“Absolutely not. I love you too much for that.”

As they walked across the campus, headed for the fine arts building and Blaine’s audition, he knew what he’d said was true. Months prior, he never would have expected to have those things to say. He hadn’t expected the friendships, the piecework family, the Kurt of it all. But there he was with all of it.

For the first time in his life, Blaine found himself welcoming the unexpected.