Oct. 8, 2012, 9:49 a.m.
Keep it together: Nightmares I can't control
T - Words: 1,676 - Last Updated: Oct 08, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 20/20 - Created: Aug 27, 2012 - Updated: Oct 08, 2012 563 0 1 0 1
I opened my eyes slowly seeing the other side of the bed empty. I sat up in the bed quickly looking around the empty room. For those few seconds I honestly thought it was all just a dream but, I remembered how real it was. I get up out of the bed and head downstairs. When I get into the kitchen I see Kurt sitting at the table with a glass of water sitting in front of him.
"You know if you don't get enough beauty sleep you might not look as beautiful, but then again you are Kurt Hummel." I smile as he lets out a little laugh and I sit beside him sitting sideways on the chair.
"You okay?" I asked worried as he nods his head not looking at me. He looks down to his hands in his lap.
"Yeah, I just couldn't sleep."
"Why didn't you wake me?" he just shrugged his shoulders lifting his head up to look at me.
"It's half six in the morning. You need to sleep."
"So do you. Whenever you need me you know I will be there, okay?" he nods his head as he gives me a smile. I know in time he will talk about what happened but, he needs time and I will be ready to listen anytime.
"Hey, are you hungry?"
"I am actually yeah." I get up from the table and head over to the fridge opening it up.
"Well, there is enough food here to last months."
"Yeah but, with Finn around that food would be gone in a few days." I hear him laugh and I know that's a real one.
"So, on the breakfast menu today we have like, everything until Finn comes down."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Blaine there has to be a limit of how much tomato sauce you put on that." Kurt said as he looked at me sitting beside him putting tomato sauce over the sausages, beans, puddings and scrambled egg all on top of a piece of bread. I put down the bottle and put on another slice of bread over everything that looked like a sandwich with a lot of red sauce.
"Now am done." I picked up the sandwich and took a big bite as the sauce came out of the sandwich and dropped on the plate. I put the sandwich down back onto the plate as I chewed.
"That is so good." I mumbled with my mouth full.
"Manners, Anderson." Kurt giggled as he put some food into his mouth.
"Try it. It's really nice. I promise." I pushed the plate towards him and he raised an eyebrow at me as he saw all that sauce. He slowly picked it up looking at it before he took a bite of it. After a few seconds he swallowed and said.
"Fine, it is nice and it is also mine now." Kurt said as he pulled the plate to the other side of the table away from me. I shook my head smiling and we looked up to see Finn come in to the kitchen.
"Morning, guys. You both are up early." Finn looked from us to around the kitchen seeing all the dishes in the sink.
"Finn it's nearly eight, it's not that early."
"It is for me. How are you this morning?" Finn asked as his face went serious.
"I'm okay, don't worry about me. Now would you like some food?" Kurt asked changing the subject and Finn and I share a worried glance before I say.
"I could make you an awesome sandwich."
"Yeah, awesome" Finn said as he took a seat across from us. "Did the red sauce explode or something on the table and your face, Blaine?"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I was sitting in the kitchen talking to Burt about what happened last night. Kurt had gone up to his room to sleep for a while. It was nearly seven and Kurt had been asleep since five.
"Do you think he should off gone to the hospital last night?" I asked Burt who sat across the table from me.
"He wouldn't off went but, at least the paramedics checked him over last night and he seemed to be as well as he could have been. I just hope the police don't ring up today. They asked enough questions last night. Did he say anymore to you?"
"No. He knows we are here to listen when he needs us."
"Yes. Blaine, I am not mad for what you did but, I am mad at you for going by yourself with Sebastian. Anything could off happen to you both if it wasn't for Cooper." Burt said softly. He wasn't mad he was just, worried.
"I know, am sorry. I wanted to tell you but, I couldn't chance you having another heart attack, Burt." He gave me a smile as he got up from the table and put his hand on my shoulder.
"You're a good kid Blaine. You always do your best no matter what. You and Kurt are both so lucky to have each other. I am telling you if Kurt's mom was here she would off loved you like a son…just like I do. Now, I better head out and do some shopping. I swear that fridge was full this morning." Burt shook his head chuckling as he headed out the door.
"I love you like a dad to, Burt." I whispered to no one just myself. I sat here for a few minutes just thinking of everything that has happened over the past week. It was all so unreal and I never thought I would go through something like that. I never thought that would happen to Kurt in a million years. I get pulled out of my thoughts when I hear shouting upstairs. It's Kurt. I run as fast as I can up the stairs to get to Kurt's room. I can hear him shouting things like stop. Go away. Help. Blaine. I get up to the top of the stairs and push open Kurt's door. He is asleep, he's having a nightmare. I go over to the bed kneeling down at the side of the bed putting my hand on his shoulder as he still shouts.
"Leave me alone." He starts to shout louder and I shake his shoulder gently trying to get him to wake up. He was crying, his face was wet with tears.
"Kurt, wake up. Come on, it's just a nightmare." In a few seconds he opens his eyes sitting up so fast in the bed and moves a bit away from me.
"Kurt, it's me, Blaine." I say softly as he looks up at me and realises that. He chokes out tears as he looks away from me. I move closer to him carefully as I put my arms around him bringing him into my chest as I lean against the headboard with him crying into my chest.
"Ssh, come on, you're okay. I promise you're safe." I whisper over his choked cries. My hand is on his back and I can feel the wetness on the back of his t-shirt. I try my best not to end up crying to but, seeing Kurt like this makes it so hard not to.
"I got you, I always got you."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We were sat outside in the porch on the garden swing. The sun was still shining but it was starting to get cold. I was sitting opposite Kurt with my legs crossed with both my hands holding on to his between us. Kurt was sat the same way as he told me everything that happened. There was moments were he broke down again and other times were he would just keep going. I don't know how long we had been outside and Burt still hadn't come back yet. Carole and Finn were both at work. He told me everything from the moment he got back to the airport and was waiting for us to pick him up and then when everything went blank till he woke up to see Dave.
"I wish I hadn't of done it or said that but, I had to get him to make him believe that…" he was talking so fast and getting worked up that I needed to stop him.
"Kurt, look at me." Kurt raised up his head from looking at our joined hands to meet my eyes.
"I know. I believe you, of course I do. You have nothing to be sorry for. You should of told me you couldn't sleep last night because you had a nightmare." He gave me a little smile.
"I don't know why I didn't wake you. They are horrible nightmares. I am right back there running away but, there's this glass wall stopping me from getting free and you're on the other side of it. I can't get to you and then you're gone. Dave pulls me back and that's when I wake up." Well, so much for trying to stay strong for Kurt because the tears are streaming down my face. I feel Kurt's hands pull away from mine and sit either side of my face as he wipes away my tears as he still looks me in the eyes.
"Kurt…would you have really of …would you have…I can't even say it. Would you have stood there and just of got shoot." I looked back down to my hands trying to stop the tears and to pull myself together.
"Yes. I would for you. He was mad at me, not you or Sebastian. It would have been my fault if that had happened."
"No, no it would not have been." I lift my head back up quickly to look at him. "You didn't know this was going to happen."
"I know but, I let him back in to my life after everything he did."
"You did that because you are the kindness most loving person Kurt. It isn't your fault, it never will be." I say as I pull him into a hug.
"We will get through this together. I love you so much, Kurt." I mumble into his shoulder as my tears finally stop for now.
"I love you to." I can feel Kurt holding on tighter to me like I was about to let him go.