When Holden emerges from the bathroom Kurt was sitting on his bed waiting for him.

“Holden, come sit.” Kurt says patting a spot next to him on his bed.

“Ew?” Holden says and Kurt just laughs.

“Okay fine, I’ll just invade your bed.” Kurt smiles sitting criss-cross-applesauce at the foot of Holden’s bed.

Holden tries not to blush as he asks Kurt what he’s doing in his bed.

“Well we needed to chat.” Kurt says simply. “If you’re uncomfortable with me I can move.” Kurt says awkwardly.

“No no, I’m not uncomfortable with you. That’s not what I meant.” Holden blushes. I’m very comfortable with you in my bed Holden wants to add but doesn’t.

“So what did you want to talk about?” Holden’s breath hitches as Kurt moves closer to him.

“It’s about Blaine.” Kurt smiles. Of course he smiles when he mentions Blaine.

“What about him?” Holden asks trying not to sound jealous but coming off as snarky.

“Did Blaine do something to you? Do you have a problem with him?” Kurt asks his eyes full of concern. And Holden hated to look into those eyes and see an ounce of pain. Kurt looked so worried about this. Holden didn’t mean to worry Kurt.

“No, he never did anything.” Holden says truthfully.

“But you do have a problem with him?” Kurt asks.

Holden just shrugs.

“Blaine’s really sorry. He doesn’t understand why you don’t like him but he just wants to make things right. Whatever reason you have for not liking him I’m sure the two of you can resolve it.” Kurt smiles.

I don’t like him because he has you is what Holden wants to say but chooses to go with, “Okay.”

“Okay? So you’ll talk to him? Work things out?” Kurt asks excitedly.

“Yeah.” Holden shrugs.

“So why don’t you like him?” Kurt asks curiously.

“Is it bothering him that much that one person doesn’t like him?” Holden asks.

“He’s just worried is all. Really he’s just concerned for you.” Kurt sighs.

“He shouldn’t be worried about how I feel.” Holden says coldly.

“He’s just caring.” Kurt says.

“Yeah I know, but he shouldn’t be worried about me. Not when he has something so wonderful so special. He should just treat it with respect and love it. He shouldn’t care what I have to think. Blaine has something incredible and he’s letting it sit around while he worries about how I feel when he should be showering it with love. What he has is beautiful and possibly the best, most pure thing in the entire world. As far as I’m concerned Blaine is the luckiest man alive for what he has. He shouldn’t be wasting time wondering about one person doesn’t exactly like him. Not when he has what he has.” Holden smiles.

“And what does he have?” Kurt asks now confused.

“He has you.” Holden blushes.

“Awwwwwhhhh!!!!! Holden you are such a sweetheart!!! Come here and give me a hug!” Kurt squeals pulling Holden into a tight embrace.

Holden can’t even remember the last time he was held like this. What he knows is that he never wants to let go.

As Kurt smiles and buries his head in the crook of Holden’s neck laughing sweetly, Holden places and unfelt kiss the top of Kurt’s hair.

Yeah he never wanted this moment to end.

Unfortunately Kurt pulls away. If that didn’t break him enough what he said next did.

“That was the sweetest thing ever! I can’t wait to tell Blaine what you said!” Kurt smiled fondly.

Of course he would want to tell Blaine.

Why couldn’t he just see what Holden felt for him?

Now Holden really did hate Blaine.

Why could Blaine have this perfect, perfect person all to himself?

There is nothing more that Holden could possibly want than to have Kurt back in his arms.

He knew that wouldn’t happen and that honestly upset him.

“I think I’m going to go to sleep now.” Holden shrugs.

“Okey dokey! Night Holden!” Kurt says hugging him once more and skipping back over to his side of the room.

Holden wasn’t really going to sleep, he wouldn’t be able to. So he just laid there and watched Kurt out of the corner of his eyes to not be suspicious.

Holden couldn’t help himself when a moan escaped his lips as Kurt lifted his shirt above his head.

“Like what you see?” Kurt teased laughing hysterically to himself.

“I, uh, I um, uh.” Holden stammered trying, but failing, to remove his eyes from Kurt’s naked upper half.

His skin was pale, but not pasty. More so like porcelain. He was almost sickly skinny with his bones jutting out further than had to be healthy. But still managed to look damn sexy.

Holden’s eyes trailed down from his very visible rib cage down to where his hip bones stuck out profoundly. And oh God the V from where his hip bones were that leads down to oh God, stop thinking! Holden scolds himself.

Kurt’s body was absolutely breathtakingly beautiful.

But all that beauty was scared by ugly red cuts. Cuts that looked healed but Holden knew would turn to scars. Some looked deeper than others. Others looked older. And some looked like they had been more recent.

Holden wished more than anything that he could just run over and kiss each and every one of his scars and make them better. He wished to worship Kurt’s body. Treat him how he deserved to be treated. But Holden knew that none of that could happen.

And he was rudely reminded that none of that could happen by all the fucking hickeys that littered Kurt’s neck and chest.

Kurt seemed to notice him staring as he began to speak. “Damn Blaine and his fucking mouth.” Kurt laughs looking at himself in the mirror.

“He just wants the world to know you’re his.” Holden supplied from across the room.

“Yeah well people don’t need to see hickeys all over my neck to know that I’m forever and always his.” Kurt smiled. “They just look trashy.” Kurt laughs.

“You don’t look trashy.” You look beautiful.

“Thanks. But don’t you think I have enough markings on my body?” Kurt laughs running his hands idly up and down the scars covering his body.

“They’ll heal. And so will you.” Holden smiles.

“Thanks Holden. Do you want me to hit the light so you can sleep?” Kurt asks politely.

No! Leave it on so I can stare at you! “Oh yes, that would be lovely. Thanks.” Holden says softly.

“No problem. Goodnight Holden.” Kurt says climbing into bed.

“Night Kurt.” Holden says closing his eyes as Kurt kisses the picture of Blaine above his bed wishing it was him.

“Goodnight Blaine. I love you.” Kurt whispers snuggling into bed.

“I love you too.” Holden says just below a whisper so to not be heard by the other boy.

“MMMMM!!!! My bed smells like Blaine!!” Kurt says contently pulling all the covers over his face.

My bed smells like you. From when you sat next to me earlier. When you hugged me. You hugged me! Twice!