Dec. 29, 2011, 10:55 a.m.
Forever and Always: Chapter 12
K - Words: 1,248 - Last Updated: Dec 29, 2011 Story: Complete - Chapters: 13/13 - Created: Dec 29, 2011 - Updated: Dec 29, 2011 1,024 0 1 0 0
Kurt spent a lot more time with Quinn over the next few days.
As much as he tried to pretend, it wasn't just for Colbie's benefit.
In the days that followed, Kurt could feel nothing but sympathy towards Quinn. He didn't condone with what she'd done - he hadn't from the start; if it hadn't of been for her innocent child, for Colbie… But he understood what she was feeling. The feeling of loneliness stuck with a person. Right then, she had no one; no one to turn to, no one to be a shoulder to cry on - and, most importantly, no one to help her. Even if she had lost a lot of people by her own doing, it was right then, especially, that she needed someone.
So Kurt took it upon himself to be that person. Admittedly, he wasn't very good at it. When he'd been in similar situations, all he'd had was Blaine - and he was not to Quinn, what Blaine was to him. But he tried, and that was all he could do. After all, this was half his fault. He knew it was too late for pointing fingers - at least, for him it was - but with Finn currently doing it, Kurt couldn't stop himself either.
Finn didn't speak to Kurt those few days. In fact, Kurt never saw his step-brother. But he thought that, in some ways, that was probably good; Finn would most likely have a good at Kurt when he saw him next. He tried to pretend like he didn't know when that would be - a few years, maybe, when Finn had forgotten all about this? - but as the chocolate on the advent calendars dwindled, so did the time to Christmas day.
'Kurt, what time are you and Blaine arriving tomorrow?'
From the kitchen island, Kurt looked up at his stepmother in surprise, blinking as he tried to think of an answer. 'Oh, umm - '
'Because I was planning on having the dinner ready at one.'
'Oh, right,' he replied, feeling Quinn's eyes boring into his coffee cup, determined to fade into the background. 'Well, I guess we'll be here at twelve?'
From the stove, with her back to them, Carole nodded. 'That'll give Colbie time to open her presents.'
Kurt bit his lip, the conversation in Quinn's presence unbearably awkward now. 'Carole - '
'Quinn, you're invited too, of course.'
'Oh, no, Carole, I - '
'Nonsense. You're family.'
Their eyes all fell on the blonde toddler, playing on the carpet in front of them with her 'cousins', before nodding in unison. For Colbie, they would work this out.
Christmas day, however, tested them. Along with the general Christmas crazy, Kurt could feel the tension in the air rising and rising until it reached boiling point. Both Finn and Quinn only spot to control the madness of the twins, or to make polite conversation - and never to each other. They sat at opposite ends of the table, distanced by at least one child; a seating plan devised by Carole to make sure no one addressed the elephant in the room, wanting everyone to pretend they were still a normal family.
And her plan worked. Nothing was said over the table; especially as both Kurt and Finn knew that neither of their parents would allow it. Not to mention Kurt was terrified to speak to Finn, just in case he was mad still. Which was probably likely. Instead, both of the men divided their attention between their families during the meal, before being lumped with the duty of washing up, while the rest opened their presents. For a while, they worked in silence, settling effortlessly back into their childhood pattern. And then -
'Why did you do it?' Finn suddenly blurted, turning to his step-brother.
Kurt blinked, but wasn't at all surprised. He'd known that, eventually, Finn would come to him to make sense of it; to get his side of this mess. Because it was a mess, if you looked at it a certain way. Quinn had made a mess, and as much as Blaine and he had tried to clear it up, the traces of dishonesty were still visible. Especially now Finn knew it had been there in the first place.
'Because,' was all Kurt could reply with at first, busying himself with drying plates. 'Because your family are better off not knowing - then you don't need to pretend it didn't happen; to you, it didn't.'
'And what am I supposed to do, now?' demanded Finn, forgetting he had dishes to wash. 'Pretend it didn't happen?'
As calmly as he could, Kurt put down his towel and turned to him. 'Look, Finn, I know you're mad and I get it. Quinn betrayed you. Again. But I'd rather you didn't shout at me.'
'You betrayed me too. You didn't tell me about this.'
'Because, as much as you irritate me sometimes, I didn't want to see you get hurt,' he confessed, and the slightly surprised look on his step-brother's face made it easier for him to go on. 'I kept Quinn's affair a secret to protect you. And so did she.'
'If she didn't want to hurt me , Kurt, she wouldn't have - '
He sighed exasperatedly. 'Finn. Quinn dropped out of college, raised two kids and put her dreams on hold for you. Okay, sure, she's made a few mistakes along the way - that Christmas included - but she went to all the trouble of finding me and Blaine, and practically begging us to help her hide it from you. Do you think that if she didn't care about you - didn't love you - she would have done that?'
After a moment, Finn mused quietly, 'She has done a lot for me… but why did she want you and Blaine to have Colbie? Why not someone else?'
Kurt lent against the sideboard, letting go the breath he'd been holding, glad they were past the worst. 'When Quinn turned up on our doorstep, we were trying to adopt. Only, being who we are, it's not as straight forward as it is for other people. We were constantly hitting walls. We'd been at it for months when Quinn arrived. I guess it didn't take her long to see how much the battle was effecting us and she - she offered us her baby. Us. Out of everyone, she picked us. It was our last chance, Finn, and we had to take it. So, Blaine and I never lied to you about Colbie. We always made sure that we'd keep as close to the truth about that - so that, when Colbie asked, she'd know more or less what happened.'
Finn nodded numbly, going back to drying the dishes, but Kurt saw his hands shake before he dropped a plate back into the bow of suds. 'Oh, Kurt. What am I going to do?'
Kurt thought carefully before answering. 'Do you remember that Disney movie, Lilo and Stitch, that came out when we were a few years older than Ethan and Evan? The whole story revolved around the Hawaiian concept Ohana -"Ohana means family, family means nobody gets left behind - or forgotten". If I were you, I'd think about what not abandoning or forgetting means.'
Finn looked over at him and frowned. 'How do you remember that, dude?'
He shrugged, picking up a plate to wash. 'Blaine likes Disney films.'
'Oh,' was all his step-brother replied, passing him a piece of cutlery.
Biting his lip, Kurt took the fork and dared to ask, 'So… we're okay now, yeah?'
'Not okay,' Finn replied. 'But we're getting there.'