[mood music]

They were quiet for a long time afterward, just breathing and holding each other.  Kurt occasionally pressed a kiss to Blaines temple or stroked his fingers over Blaines shoulders. 

Blaine didnt move at all; he just clutched Kurt like a lifeline.  Eventually he squeezed his eyes shut tightly and in one strong move he sat up and away from Kurt. 

"We should go."

Okay.  Closet Cowboy was back.  Kurt guessed he could understand that, so he didnt push Blaine, even though he wished Blaine would open up a little.  Kurt cleaned up and donned his clothes, and Blaine did likewise.  As they left the hotel room, dropping the key on the top of the bed as they went, Kurt half expected Blaine to suggest that they leave one at a time, but he didnt.  They walked to the pickup together. 

No words were exchanged all the way back to the ranch. 

When the truck rumbled to a stop in front of the main lodge, Kurt reached a hand out and rested it on Blaines forearm.  Blaine looked down at Kurts hand but didnt say anything.  Kurt let his hand linger there for a moment, then he squeezed Blaines arm and released it saying, "Goodnight."

Blaine just looked at Kurt, but as Kurt swung out of the truck, he heard Blaine say very quietly, "Goodnight, beautiful."

Kurt gave a small smile. 

The lodge was deserted when Kurt entered the main room, except for Santana, who was sitting at a table with her feet propped up on it, a bottle of Jack Daniels beside her with two glasses. 

When Kurt walked by, she slid one glass and the bottle closer to Kurt and pointed to a chair.  "Sit," she commanded. 

Curious, Kurt did as she said, and he watched as she tipped a generous amount of whiskey into both glasses and held hers up in a silent salute.  Kurt clinked her glass and took a deep swallow, reveling in the feel as it burned down his throat. 

"So," she began, "you were out with my man, Blaine.  You were gone a long time."

Blaine intimidated Kurt, even now; Santana did not.  He wasnt going to engage with her. 

"What of it?"

"I have a friend who works at the Best Western.  Two men sharing a hotel room...that doesnt go unnoticed around here."

Kurt took another swallow of his whiskey.  "Im surprised at you, Santana.  Given your own sexual predilections, I would think youre the last one who would want to spread prurient gossip."

Santana narrowed her eyes, "What do you mean by ‘your own sexual predilections?" She used her fingers to make air quotes.

Kurt leaned in, "Get off it, Santana.  Youre gay, Im gay, Blaines gay.  For all I know, half the ranch hands here could be gay.  I know, but I dont care.  But I get why Blaines in the closet, and I would not be cool with you outing him."

Santana leaned back in her chair and laughed.  "I cant out Blaine.  Everyone in three counties knows that the KB is run by the Gay Caballero.  Did you honestly think I was scandalized because I found out that Blaines having sex with men?"

Kurts whole world view shifted on its axis.  "Wait, wait, wait," Kurt waived both hands in the air.  "One thing at a time.  If everyone knows that Blaines gay, why are you interrogating me about where Blaine and I were or what we were doing?"

Santana leaned forward again, "Blaines my man.  Hes like a brother to me.  Hes been through a lot, and I dont want to see him get hurt again."

"Why would I hurt him?  How would I hurt him?  I hardly know anything about him."

"Clearly you know some things about him."

Kurt blushed, "Okay, yes.  But youre all over me like Im going to cheat on Blaine or leave him heart broken.  Ive known him for less than a day.  I sincerely doubt that hes fallen madly in love with me."

"Okay.  Youre right.  Sorry."  Santana gave Kurt a contrite look, "I love him, and I worry about him.  I just got a little crazy.  I dont know you, but you seem okay, Lady Lips."

"Did you just call me, ‘Lady Lips?"

"Lady Lips, Fancy Pants, Swishy the Clown.  You pick."

Kurt chuckled.  "God."

Santana leaned closer and whispered conspiratorially, "Was he good?"

Kurt looked outraged, "Im not going to tell you that!"  He took another sip of his whiskey and leaned in, "And, yes.  Very."

Santana laughed, and, just like that, they were friends.  They drank their whiskey together in companionable silence, draining and refilling their glasses. 

"How does everyone know?  About Blaine being gay, I mean," Kurt finally asked.  He had assumed Blaines tremulousness could be explained by lack of experience or even a failure to fully come to terms with his own sexuality perhaps coupled with a deep-seated need to hide who he was from the world.  Santanas revelation blew that theory all to Hell. 

"Ah, it was a while ago," Santana recounted.  "Blaine used to be different.  I dont mean straight--just, different.  Outgoing.  Bubbly, even.  In high school, Blaine was the golden boy.  He played three sports, he was a straight A student, he was Student Body President.  He had a million friends.  Everyone here knew him and liked him, and they knew his dad, who was a good man--a respected man.  Then his dad died and some stuff happened, and he changed.  He became...hard."

Santana shook her head like the transformation was hard to contemplate.   

"Anyhow, before all of that, Blaine never talked about his sexual orientation.  Its Idaho so...I mean, I knew.  Sam did, too, and probably Mike and Tina--we were all in school together and thick as thieves--but we werent going to tell.  Blaine never had a boyfriend, not that I knew of, but he went into Twin Falls sometimes on the weekend, and maybe he hooked up there.  I dont know."

Santana shrugged, and then she tipped her glass back and drained it before she continued. 

"Anyhow, I finished college and I was teaching music at the high school.  God, I was full of myself.  One week this woman I used to see off and on decided to come down from Pocatello to visit me, and I wanted to flaunt my cosmopolitan self in every one of their self-righteous faces.  So we would walk around town holding hands and going to dinner and movies, right out there where anyone could see us.  It was stupid; I was so naïve."  Santana shrugged, "The school board found out about it, and I lost my job."

"What?  They cant fire you for being gay!  Its against the law."

Santana shook her head, "In theory, but you dont know what its like here.  Most of the people here are LDS."

"LDS?"

"Mormons.  Probably eighty percent of the Anglos living around her belong to the LDS church.  Its okay if you want to believe how they do.  Most of them are really good people, but they dont exactly embrace homosexuality.  And dont kid yourself if you dont think Chaparral is a theocracy.  The mayor, the police chief, the judges, every member of the school board--theyre all LDS.  They control everything.  If they wanted to fire me, no one was going to stop them."

"So what did this have to do with Blaine?"

"Blaine was furious.  He went to the school board meeting and pitched a giant hissy fit.  He told everyone there that he was gay, too, and that they should reconsider firing me, or he was going to tell everyone who would listen what hed been up to in high school with their sons at Boy Scout Camp and on band trips and in the locker rooms.  He was bluffing, of course.  Im pretty sure hardly any of the guys we went to high school with swung that way or even had an inkling that Blaine was gay.  Still, it made them pause."

Santana shrugged, "It didnt matter; I quit anyway.  Even if theyd kept me, none of the parents were going to let their kids study with a gay teacher, and Id rather work here than be responsible for closing down an entire school music program." 

Kurt placed a hand over Santanas.  "Im so sorry that happened to you." 

Santana smiled grimly, "Its okay.  I like it here, but thank you."

They sat quietly for a moment, and then Kurt remembered something, "You said ‘some stuff happened.  You said Blaines dad died and some stuff happened that made Blaine...like he is now."

"Sorry, Lady Lips," said Santana, rising unsteadily from her chair, "Thats not my story to tell."