Wednesday, before first period:

Blaine: Morning.

Kurt: Good morning… Um, Blaine?

Blaine: Hmm?

Kurt: Why are you circling me like a hawk?

Blaine: Just getting a good look at this baby-butt skin soft face.

Kurt: Oh. Okay. Verdict?

Blaine: Totally worth getting cock-blocked over.

Kurt: My moisturizing routine cock-blocked you?

Blaine: Hells yeah.

Kurt: Oh, really? What exactly would have happened had I not needed to get ready for bed?

Blaine: Magical things, Hummel. But now you’ll never know.

Kurt: … Never?

Blaine: Well, until tonight.

Kurt: *blushes* What’s happening tonight.

Blaine: I plan on texting you again. Consider yourself warned.

Kurt: Oh dear. I feel like I should gird my loins.

Blaine: I can think of other uses for your loins.

Kurt: Blaine! *thwumps*

Blaine: *waggly eye brows*

Kurt: *blushes* I gotta get to class.

Blaine: See ya later. Don’t run into any other hot guys on their way to history! I got here first!

* * *

Wednesday, fourth period:

Awesome Black Friend: Dude, what are you doing?

Blaine: Hmmm.

Awesome Black Friend: … Uh, earth to Anderson. Come in, Anderson. We have a situation down here.

Blaine: Huh?

Awesome Black Friend: I said, what exactly do you think you’re doing?

Blaine: I was staring distractedly into space. I know you’re a little slow in the up take, David, but I thought that much was clear.

David: Shut it you. I meant, what do you think you’re doing, fawning over that Glee kid.

Blaine: I’m not fawning.

David: No, whatever you’re doing is much more embarrassing. You’ve known him all of 48 hours and you’re day dreaming about his delicious dream boat eyes already, aren’t you?

Blaine: Hey, back off. Find your own delicious eyes to dream about.

David: Dude, *facepalms* I am so not interested in Kurt Hummel.

Blaine: Well, you should be! He sure is purdy.

David: Now I’m confused.

Blaine: Your left shoe is the one with the arch on the right and vice versa for the right shoe.

David: *punches*

Blaine: Ouch! What was that for?

David: For you being an insufferable troll. First you’re warning me to find my own Gleek to pine over, and next you’re telling me that I should be interested because he has many fine qualities. I have a girlfriend. Remember Maria?

Blaine: What can I say, I’m a walking contradiction. Scientists are baffled and impressed by me.

David: Oh god. Can we stay on topic please?

Blaine: What topic is that again?

David: You. Being interested in a Glee kid. A male Glee kid.

Blaine: Uh-huh…?

David: That’s fine and dandy in theory, but we’re in high school.

Blaine: Ooh, glad you picked up on that.

David: A very large, very public, very unforgiving, high school.

Blaine: Don’t be dramatic.

David: You’re only safe in your gayness, because this place is so big.

Blaine: David.

David: What? It’s true. Not everybody is as accepting as I am.

Blaine: And I am grateful for you.

David: But?

Blaine: But I like Kurt. And a bunch of intolerant red-necks are not going to scare me off of pursuing his fashionably-clad ass.

David: Oh god.

Blaine: What?

David: You’re gonna die.

Blaine: No, I’m not.

David: Yes, you are. You’re gonna go for the Gleek gay, thereby committing social suicide and making not only you, but him also,  targets for abuse and torture.

Blaine: Don’t be dramatic.

David: Blaine, have you ever known me to be dramatic?

Blaine: *adopts really bad accent* Blaine? Blaine? I think I have stomach cancer. I’ve got this weird pain in my gut and I feel dizzy and my vision is narrowing as we speak. I need to go to the doctor, Blaine!

David: Shut up.

Blaine: What were the pains, in fact?

David: Die. In a fire.

Blaine: Go on, tell Dr Blaine what you were actually suffering from.

David: It’s not the same thing.

Blaine: Gas pains, David.

David: This is totally different.

Blaine: All you needed was some quality time with the bathroom and you were fine.

David: I can’t believe you are comparing the two.

Blaine: Or there was the time with Iffy, the hamster.

David: Iffy was totally fine the one moment and completely dead the next. There was definitely foul play involved.

Blaine: He was a million years old. He snuffed it from natural causes.

David: That hamster was invincible.

Blaine: David.

David: What?

Blaine: I know.

David: Know what? That Iffy was invincible or who is responsible for his death?

Blaine: I know that my pursuing Kurt is not going to go over well with the rest of the school, slash town, slash my family.

David: But?

Blaine: There’s something about him that I can’t put my finger on.

David: They say you need to crook your finger towards the front and feel around for it.

Blaine: David! *thumps* How the hell would you even know about that?

David: Maria reads Wincest. She’s scarily clued up on gay sex.

Blaine: Really? … Huh.

David: What?

Blaine: Maybe I should ask her for advice.

David: Oh god.

* * *

Wednesday, afternoon:

Kurt: Oh, for the love of-

Blaine: Struggling there?

Kurt: Blaine!

Blaine: Hey, Kurt.

Kurt: How are you?

Blaine: Ugh. This day is depressingly long.

Kurt: Tell me about it. I have double math with Wilkins now.

Blaine: My deepest sympathies.

Kurt: Thank you. However, I might never get there if this goddamn locker won’t open.

Blaine: You just gotta- *bang* Thwack it a little bit. Show it who’s boss.

Kurt: That. Was incredible.

Blaine: Hey, some people whisper to horses, but me? I’m all about lockers.

Kurt: *gazes, mouth slightly open, shaking his head*

Blaine: Uh, why are you looking at me like that?

Kurt: You are the strangest person I have ever met.

Blaine: Well you’re kinda funny looking, too!

Kurt: Hey! I didn’t mean that in a bad way!

Blaine: Neither did I. *grins*

Kurt: You called me funny looking.

Blaine: In a good way.

Kurt: You’re implying that you want to laugh whenever you look at me. What part of that could possibly be good?

Blaine: The part where I don’t ever want to stop looking at you.

Kurt: *jaw drops* …

Blaine: …

Kurt: How do you do that?

Blaine: Do what?

Kurt: Stop all my cognitive function with a few words.

Blaine: *grins* It’s a mad skill.

*BELL RINGS FREAKISHLY LOUDLY*

Kurt: Oh, crap. We’re supposed to be in class already. *grabs books at random*

Blaine: How about… Play hooky with me.

Kurt: What?

Blaine: Ditch class and come with me.

Kurt: Don’t be ridiculous.

Blaine: No, Kurt, seriously. Hey, stop walking.

Kurt: What the-

Blaine: We can talk better in here.

Kurt: We have to get to class.

Blaine: Let’s blow it off. Just today. Let’s forget about school and just… go do something. Together.

Kurt: But… Class.

Blaine: It’s last period. We won’t be missing much.

Kurt: This idea is just crazy.

Blaine: I know.

Kurt: …

Blaine: …

Kurt: Blaine?

Blaine: Yeah?

Kurt: How would we even leave without being spotted? Also, I don’t have my car today.

Blaine: We can leave through the science room windows in Mr Mitchell’s class. He doesn’t have class now.

Kurt: And then?

Blaine: We make a dash for my car. It isn’t parked that far away.

Kurt: This is worst idea ever.

Blaine: I love this idea.

Kurt: … Me, too.

Blaine: Let’s go.