Nick and Jeff left for work, Jeff worked at Javu as pastry chef and Nick is a Gym teacher at Tribeca prep.

“Kurt, are you sure you’ll be alright?” Jeff asked, concerned.

“Yes! I’ll be fine, okay? Just go to work already, you’ll be late.”

“Fine, as long as you’re sure … we want you as you are now when we return, okay?!”

“I promise - now get or I won’t make pancakes again tomorrow!”

“Okay, okay … we’re going, we’re going.” said Nick hustling his boyfriend out the door.

“Bye, guys! Thanks again for letting me stay and for getting some of my stuff.” Kurt called down the hall; he walked to the kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee before sitting down on the sofa and dialling the phone.

“Hey, it’s that Millie? Yeah, it’s Kurt. I’m alright thanks … um, Millie - is anyone in yet? Great, patch me through? Okay, bye Millie … yes, we’ll have to meet for coffee and have a nice catch up.”

Kurt sat and waited for the other person to pick up.

“Hey Kurt, what’s up? It’s almost 9am … where are you?” they said.

“Harriet, hey. I’m having a bit of a personal crisis at the moment - would you mind terribly if I worked from home today? I’ll be back tomorrow … I just have some stuff to deal with …”

“Of course Kurt, could you get some fall line sketches done?”

“Yes, I have ten of them already … would you like me to fax them over?”

“Yes please, that would be great. I’m sorry to hear about whatever it is. I hope it gets better soon”

“Yeah, you and me both, Harriet. I’ll go fax those now, and I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”

Kurt hung up the phone and got dressed in some of the clothes Nick and Jeff had lent him. He was glad they were picking up some of his own clothes later. He slung on his Prada ankle boots and Gucci anorak and walked to the nearest copy place.

On his walk he was reminded of the first time he and Blaine met … it was a moment that changed his life for the better.

~~~

“Excuse me … um – hi! Can I ask you a question, I’m - I’m new here?” said Kurt nervously, as a throng of blue blazers passed him. Thankfully a slightly shorter boy with dark hair had stopped and turned.

“My name’s Blaine.” the dark-haired boy replied. He had beautiful amber eyes; Kurt fell almost instantly. It was almost as if he was meant to find Blaine, like this meeting was fate.

“Kurt! Um - so what exactly is going on?” He asked, looking around at the sea of blazers rushing down the stairs which all seemed to be heading to the same place.

“The Warblers! Every now and then they throw an impromptu performance in the senior commons. It tends to shut the school for a while.” Blaine answered with a small laugh. How Kurt loved that laugh … it made Blaine’s eyes sparkle.

“So wait - the glee club here is kind of cool?” said Kurt disbelievingly. He couldn’t imagine the glee club being cool, not after all the daily slushies, the taunts, the harassment he and his fellow members had to endure.

“The Warblers are like rock stars! Come on, I know a short cut …” said Blaine taking Kurt’s hand, Kurt's pulse quickening as Blaine dragged him off down a corridor.

“Oh, I stick out like a sore thumb!” Kurt exclaimed.

“Well next time don’t forget your jacket, new kid. You’ll fit right in!” said Blaine with a wink. “Now, if you’ll excuse me …” He continued as the Warblers started harmonizing. Kurt had recognised the song almost instantly.

Blaine took him for coffee after … he told him about his past and his own experience with bullies. Blaine helped him out of his dark place, without even knowing how much he had helped him … saved him.

~~~

Kurt found himself humming Teenage Dream … he cursed himself before entering the copy place.

“Hey! How can I be of service, handsome?” said the guy behind the counter.

“Hey, Matt. I need these faxing to 1-153-11082011 please.” said Kurt distractedly,

Still deep in thought about his and Blaine’s first meeting, he almost didn’t hear Matt’s comments on his designs. Matt was a really good friend … Kurt knew he had a slight crush on him. It was sweet really – it had taken two terms at NYU for him to be able to say two words to Kurt. When he’d finally gathered up enough courage to stop staring at his ass from afar, he’d asked Kurt out for a drink. Kurt felt bad having to tell the obviously nervous Matt that he had a boyfriend, but they had become good friends. The three of them – Kurt, Matt and Blaine hung out, went for drinks … they had so much fun together.

“There you go. Hey, how come you’re not at work?” asked Matt, blushing at the fact his fingers brushed past Kurt’s as he handed back the gorgeous sketches.

“I don’t really want to talk about it. Sorry … it’s just a thing with me and Blaine. I’ve already talked about it a lot.” Kurt apologised. He glanced back and saw a line forming behind him. “Looks like you’re getting a little busy. I should go.”

Kurt flashed Matt a smile, and patted his arm before turning and leaving.

“Hope everything is better soon.” called Matt, causing Kurt to turn and wave before leaving the copy place.

Kurt silently hoped that it did too. He really didn’t want to lose Blaine, the only man he’d ever loved … he’d had crushes before, but it had only ever been Blaine for him. Blaine was everything he’d hoped for - the life they’d had was what he saw when Mr Schue had asked them to think of one thing to look forward to.

He arrived back at Nick and Jeff, fixed himself a cucumber sandwich, switched on the TV and flicked through the channels. There was nothing on so he decided to watch ‘RENT’, his favourite musical movie.

~~~

Kurt was sat on the white leather couch, coffee in hand, flicking through the new issue of Vogue when his phone started playing ‘Don’t Rain on My Parade’. Rachel was calling him, and he chose to ignore it. It began to ring again, and again he ignored it. He really didn’t want to talk with anyone any more than he felt was necessary; he just wanted time alone to think. Rachel kept calling, and on the fifth attempt Kurt finally picked up, as it was clear she wasn’t going leave him alone.

“Hey, Rach.” he sighed.

“Why weren’t you answering your phone? I was worried!” she said, sounding panicky.

“I’m sorry, Rach - I just don’t feel like talking much today.”

“Oh. Well I was just checking to see if you were okay and hadn’t done anything stupid.”

Kurt knew what she meant; he’d never do that again, no matter the circumstances. He hated how it made him feel to know that he’d done that to himself … hurt himself like that. He still had the scars as a reminder of how much of an idiot he’d been.

“Rachel,” he said, exasperated “I’m twenty-eight now, not sixteen. I won’t go back … it was disgusting, I see that now, and I wish I’d never done it, okay?”

“Okay, if you’re sure … but if you get those feelings again I want you to promise you’ll call me, and I’ll be straight over.”

“I promise, okay Rach?” Kurt sighed. He'd already been through this with Nick and Jeff.

“HEY! Don’t you sigh at me, we were all worried about you back then, seeing you hurt yourself and then not talking to us about it.”

“Yeah, I know… I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s okay, honey … I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?!?” said Kurt, puzzled. He didn’t remember having any plans with Rachel.

“Yeah, we’re singing a set at Bar4 in Brooklyn, remember?”

“Oh yeah … I’m sorry Rach, I’m not-”

“Please, Kurt … you promised!”

This was Rachel’s first gig in weeks, and Kurt had promised he’d sing with her. They hadn’t really had time to sing together since high school. He sank back into memories from his high school glee club - the songs they had sung, the competitions, the disappointments, the family they had.

“I know Rach, but I just don’t feel-”

“Pleeeeaaaasssseeee, Kurt.” she pleaded.

“I- ugh- fine” said Kurt reluctantly.

“Yay!” she squealed “I’ll see you tomorrow … 7:30pm.”

“Yeah, okay” Kurt said, hanging up the phone.

Tears started to roll down his cheeks as he remembered how it felt the first time he and Blaine sang a duet together. Blaine had been flirtatious and adorable … granted it was a flirty song, but still. When Blaine had his mouth those few millimetres away from Kurt's, it had taken all of his strength not to kiss those perfect pink lips. It was hard as Blaine’s eyes bore into him, looked deep into his soul and read every inch of him.

~~~

“Hey, Kurt … ooh, something smells nice!” Jeff smiled as he and Nick entered the apartment.

“Its pasta with a cheesy creamy sauce, bacon and courgette.” Kurt said as he added the cream cheese.

“Sounds divine, but aren’t we supposed to be looking after you? You are our guest, Kurt.”

“Well, seeing as Nick can’t cook to save his life and your cooking expertise is restricted solely to pastry, I thought I’d give your take-out menus a rest and cook for you.” Kurt joked, taking a spoonful of sauce and passing it to Nick and Jeff to taste.

“Oh. My. God, Kurt - that is amazing!” said Nick, eying up the dinner. “When’s it gonna be ready?”

“About 15 minutes. Why don’t you boys wash up? You have flour on your ear, Jeff - it’s driving me nuts!” Kurt smiled, returning to the stove and checking on the pasta.

Jeff brushed off his ear and followed his boyfriend to go freshen up.

~~~

They enjoyed a quiet meal, sharing musings from their day. Nick went into particular detail about what he called ‘the best damnedest game of dodgeball ever’, in which the team with all the geeks and unpopular kids won for a change. Jeff told them about the new sous chef who ended up ruining the entire stock of steaks for the week. Kurt had nothing much to report. When they had finished dinner, Kurt was intrigued by the clothes that Nick and Jeff had picked up for him.

“Wow, you guys did well! Awww, how did you know that this bow tie was my favourite? Oh, and you’ve chosen an outfit that will be perfect for tomorrow’s gig.” Kurt chimed as he unpacked the small duffle bag and hung it up. “And you’ve got all my face creams and hair products here too … thank you, guys.”

“Actually Kurt, Blaine had packed it all …” said Nick carefully, not too sure how Kurt would take that piece of information.

“He said that we would have gotten it all wrong.” said Jeff.

“Oh,” said Kurt, frantically checking the pockets on the duffle bag, as he suspected he’d found a small, folded-up piece of paper.

Nick and Jeff left, feeling that Kurt might want to be alone. He unfolded it carefully and read it.

Kurt,

I just wanted to say goodnight.

Blaine

A single tear rolled steadily down Kurt’s cheek. He missed Blaine … it had only been a day, and already he felt lost without his husband; missed seeing his eyes, missed his warmth next to him in bed. He lay down and drifted off to sleep.