It was dark from where I was standing, and I hated to admit it but I was afraid. The atomosphere is different here... I realize now that i'm caught in the middle between heaven and hell, the light is so bright that it seems dark, and the darkness is so blinding that all I can see is the light.

Where do I go? I can't feel anything in here, then again all i've ever felt before was pain, i'm not sure I would know the difference. I can hear them yelling for me, but the noises are all the same, just ringing in my ears, that same deafining tone.

All these scars are glowing now, the outline of the blood in my veins runs black. It bring a certain sadness to the air around me. If I could call it air, I'm not sure what I should call it, being as I'm not breathing either way.

How long has it been? A few hours, it feels like days. Maybe even more, but the pain is greater here, almost as if I feel nothing- nothing at all. The silence is too loud for me to handle, I just need to get out, I need to be a ghost again because this- whatever /this/ is... It's not right.

I can feel the needles in my skin, but they aren't there. As much as I would rather feel that, I feel nothing. It's like a horror movie that you can't escape, because there is no ending yet, it's still being written. I wonder what my ending will be.

It feels like forever since the last time I've talked to Kurt, I wonder if he's moved on like I told him too. It'd be the first time someone has ever listened to me. I wonder if he knows the full story, he's smart.... google can tell a person alot. I find my hollow heart empty, I miss him.

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Kurt's POV.

_

Today has been so long, dragging by and killing me slowly. My next scene starts in 7 minutes and I can't bring myself to remember my last name. It's Anderson, isn't it? Maybe it should be, that's how it outta be.  They call my name and I know I have to go, except i'm nowhere near ready to face what lies behind the door.

"Kurt."

My head snaps up and I feel myself at a loss for words, maybe everything was a dream- a nightmare. I've been having those lately.

I'm sick of these fights, these battles i've lost it, because this life is not a phase but one person can cost it...

I can hear his voice in my head, it's there and now I remember that it's real, that it happened. I had a long talk with Blaine last night, I told him about my new friend. Come to find out- he knew the name. His father had worked the case of the strange boy called 'Kilor'. He was brought to tears as he spoke, bring pain to my heart because he was my Blaine and he was so broken, explaining to me what I had neglected to notice.

He wants to meet him, I don't blame him- If I could i'd adopt that boy and he'd never have to feel any pain ever again. I know Blaine and I could raise him well, if he let us. He doesn't seem like the family oriented type, that Kilor boy. Maybe it was just in my head, he helped me... maybe he isn't all that bad.

"Kurt."

There it was again, I stood up this time, fighting back the tears because it was him, and he sounded like he was in agony.

"Kilor... Ki, can you hear me?"

It's cold now, the hairs on my arms stand straight up, I can feel his breath on my neck. His breath.... How does that work, breathing with no life. What does that make you, if you're dead, but you can breathe. Maybe one day i'll ask him, maybe when I can remember to breathe myself.

"KURT!"