Eleanor Rigby
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Eleanor Rigby: When I Get Home


M - Words: 4,787 - Last Updated: Jul 09, 2012
Story: Closed - Chapters: 3/? - Created: Jun 24, 2012 - Updated: Apr 13, 2022
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Welcome :) This story was posted previously as “Whole Human Being” so if you're looking for that you have succeed!

To explain the “Beatles Theme” a bit more: inside the chapters there will be Beatles songs “playing the background”. Well, technically they'll be narrating the story, or connecting what happening to the song; but nobody is actually singing them aloud. The italicized single lines are all the lyrics.. and I think you'll recognize them.

The song used in this chapter is “When I Get Home”, but didn't use every lyric cause.. well.. I don’t have to :)


 

"So you're on your way?"

Blaine couldn't help but smile at the worry in his voice. He knew Kurt wanted him to be happy, but also was appalled when he first said he was considering a college in Utah. The whole college choosing experience was one that seemed entirely too premature for him- not that his own choice had anything to do with it. It was his father's idea to get him to look into his own old college, as though moving to Utah appealed to Blaine in the first place. It was humid (making his gelled hair constantly commit mutiny), there was practically no theatres or places that bands could play, and most significantly, there was no Kurt.

"Yes, you can calm down alright?" he smiled into his cell phone.

"I just... I hate not seeing you. You should ask the conductor to speed up the train just for you and your very lonely boyfriend,"

Blaine's heart clenched as he was reminded of another reason why he didn't like Utah: they aren'the most liberal bunch. It's not like Ohio was shouting "gay-diddy-gay-gay-gay", nor could he judge a whole state on only the few handful of people he met, but it was though everybody had stiffened when he mentioned that he had a boyfriend back home.

"Not quite sure that saying that would appeal to him. Besides, he may get jealous.."

He heard Kurt giggle at his end, making Blaine's head fizzle with adoration. "Somehow I doubt that. But if he's cute, give him my number," he teased.

"Pshhh". Blaine sandwiched the phone between his ear and shoulder tightly as though it was bomb and clumsily tried to hand his ticket the staff member collecting them all. Grabbing his red suitcase, he followed the clot of people who were shuffling to board the train. This was the second time he had been on a train, counting the trip out here. The first time he had felt like Harry Potter on the Hogwarts Express. But he was Blaine, not Harry, and this was Amway 815, and, unlike Harry ever was, he was really freaking homesick.

I got a whole lot of things to tell her,
When I get home.

It was a 16-hour trip but, thankfully, he could afford to get a seat in the compartments. Last trip he had gotten one all to himself, and he could only hope that he wouldn't have to share. The thought of being next to a stranger was less than appealing to Blaine, but he would endure a the full 16 hours of awkwardness if that meant he could finally get home.

"Where are you right now?" asked Kurt. It surprised Blaine; he had forgotten that he still had his phone on.

"Boarding" he grunted, heaving his big suitcase up the sharp and steep steps.

"Does that mean I have to hang up?"

"NO," Blaine almost shouted. "I mean, not for a few minutes…"

"But don't you want to find your seat?"

"What I want to do is talk to you," Blaine dropped his suitcase and it opened, spilling out a pair of pants and two bowties. He cursed before asking, "how's your day?"

"Blaine, I'm hanging up. It's late. Call me tomorrow. "

"No! No, I want..." He lost his train of thought while trying to pick up his bag, than hearing Kurt clear his throat, realised that he couldn't protest. "Fine. I love you"

"I love you too."

The moment Blaine hung up his heart shriveled up a little bit. He missed Kurt more than anyone in Ohio and his fingers were tingling with homesickness.

"Can I help you sir? We need to clear the hallway," An African-American woman in a blue uniform was looking down at him, who was already clogging up the thin hallway of the train with his spilled luggage. He hadn't realized he had completely stopped walking, his mind slowly becoming more and more vacant.

Blaine was always the type of person who denies this kind of assistance, but his frustration and homesickness was overwhelming, and placing him on the verge of tears. Just wanting to get home as quickly as possible, he let out a wispy "yeah".

Come on, out of my way,
'cause I'm gonna see my baby today,

To Blaine's delight, when they arrived, there was no other person to share with. The empty seats were dark green with plaid stripes of blue- just like the ones on his way here. There was even, god knows why, a lock on the door.

"You can settle in" the assistant said, and hurried off to her other assistant-duties.

Blaine threw his suitcase on the floor, another bowtie tumbling out, but not bothering to pick it up. Taking his seat on one of the two "couches" on either side of the small room, he streched his feet out so they rested on the other side. The train would depart in about 3 minutes so the chances of someone quickly coming aboard were very slim. Exhaling loudly, he felt his body relax into the seat a bit more, and his mind slowly become more vacant. He slipped his phone out of his back pocket and considered the temptation of calling Kurt. The time zones can't be that different, he told himself. Kurt wouldn't mind another call, would he? Before he had really decided, his finger had already pressed the contact.

I've got a whole lot of things I've gotta say

"Blaine?"

"Hey, I'm in the train, so I can talk now,"

"I thought you were getting some sleep,"

"Well," he spoke in a mockingly shocked voice. "I like hearing your voice when I fall asle-" The noise that Blaine suddenly let out was an embarrassing combination of a whoop and a yelp; his whole body jumping in the air when he heard the sharp screech of the door opening followed by an even louder bang, almost tumbling out of his seat. He looked wide eyed at the source and his mouth dropped open the tiniest bit when he saw her.

There was a girl, older looking than Blaine, pressed up against the door like her whole body was super glued to it; her left hand still wrapped tightly around the doorknob. She was breathing heavily and harshly as though she was on the verge of choking. Another hand was clenched to her chest. And her clothes, some blue jeans with a massive hole in the knee and a plaid shirt that was falling off one of her thin shoulders revealing a bra strap, were absolutely filthy. Her entire body was covered with dirt and sand, along with some leaves in her hair. Herhair. It was, apart from the dirt, white. Not even very very blonde. White. It was in a messy pixie cut, with her bangs just long enough to shield her eyes from plain view but short enough that Blaine could see that they were shut tightly.

He watched her stupidly as she slumped miserably to the ground, only coming to his senses when he heard a definite click of the door lock accompanied by Kurt yells from the end of the phone asking if he was okay. His throat suddenly gripped with panic, he held the phone to his ear.

"KurtILoveYouEverythingsFineI'llTalkLaterILoveYou," he blurted in one breath, then hung up.

She still hadn't looked up at him, but her knee twitched in a way that told Blaine that she knew he was there.

The silence lasted for a couple more seconds, Blaine himself not daring to breath much less speak. His instinct told him to keep still, but his mind was whirling up theories of what the hell was happening and oh my god what if she just murdered someone and is on the runThat would explain the clothes and the entranceOh hellthis is like that Agatha Christie bookshe'all gonna kill us one by one and thenwait nodoes that one take place on train or-

He was only brought back to reality when the train lurched forward and a new wave of fear washed over him. The girl still wasn't moving, but he could see that he breathing had slowed, while his was inconveniently speeding up.

Finally, with a large thunk she allowed her hand to fall from the doorknob; her eyes fluttering open.

Blaine had to contain a gasp when they gazes met. Her eyes were incredibly mesmerizing yet terrifying at the same time. Line with red, a blind man could even tell that she had been crying, and with that realization it hit him that the girl was albino. Blaine wasn't one to let a person's appearance affect him too much but he couldn't contain a cringe. There were already seeds planted in his mind since childhood that made her resemble a villain of some sort. It was awful, and he felt guilty for reacting so blatantly but his mind quickly went on to look at the actual color of her eyes.

Yes, they were red from crying but in the middle they were an incredibly combination of blue and grey. With the tears only adding more shine the mixture, Blaine felt as though he was being hypnotized by them; not to mentioned they reminded him eerily of Kurt's.

Her eyes, however amazing, were holding onto Blaine gaze weakly. Although peppered with curiosity, it show clearly that something was wrong. Very wrong. She dropped her eyes to the floor and Blaine practically shivered at the loss of intensity.

All you alright?
What are you doing?
Can I help you?
Why are you covered in dirt?
Are you in this compartment too?
Why the hell did you lock the door?

Yet Blaine didn't ask any of the questions that were sifted through his head, but simply blurted the one that bubbled out of him first.

"Who are you?"

He didn't mean for it to come out so accusingly, and simply bit his lip while waiting for a reply; the tension still present.

She answered in a choked and sullen voice, "A-And?"

Blaine wrinkled his nose in confusion, his fear unexplainably vanishing. "What?' he cried.

"That... that's who I am," she answered more steadily, now holding eye contact once more, with a shine of annoyance in her eyes.

"Your name is 'And'?" he asked incredulity.

"No," she practically growled. "Its N"

"N?"

"N" she repeated, closing her eyes once more.

"Oh, that...uhm, unique." Blaine wasn't trying to be as awkward as he was, but, well, the circumstances were strange.

She opened her eyes at his response, looking upset and ready to retort, but gazed at him for a moment with a look that clearly read oh it'just not worth it and shut her eyes once again and slumped against the door.

When I get home.
Come on if you please,

The silence lasted for longer than Blaine would have liked, but he took the time to study... N, a but more. He could now see that slung around her elbow was a small, yet bright orange backpack that looked fairly empty except for a few lumps. With her head leaned back, it showed off her neck and holy crap she'paleEven Kurt compared to her was a significant shade difference. It was only when she opened her eyes again that he realised he had been creepily staring at her.

"It's spelled E-N," she spoke, her voice now much more clear and steady. It reminded Blaine of someone, but he couldn't quite place it.

"Your name?" he guessed.

She didn't say anything, but the was she looked at him was a confirmation that he was correct. It was though she was telepathically speaking to him. They just looked at each other, her expression changing to an unreadable one. A thought suddenly occurred to Blaine.

"Do you want to know my name?"

En didn't answer again, which annoyed Blaine, but simply stood up, and walked to the couch opposite of his, and lied down, her knees sticking up because her whole body couldn't fit, eyes glued to the ceiling and lips pressed together tightly. Blaine still hadn't sat back down since he initially jumped up, and realising this, he cautiously lowered himself onto the couch, eyes never leaving her body.

"Are you just going to ignore me the whole ti-"

"need to think!" she spoke so suddenly that caused Blaine to jump again.

He felt extremely uncomfortable with her in the room, just lying there. He wanted to just lean back and fall asleep, better yet, to get on the phone again with Kurt, but her presence was dominating; it was though she had complete control of what he could and couldn't do. But when he watched her press the heels of her hands on to her eyes and take a shaky breath, he suddenly felt as though he was imposing on something. Something was wrong, and he had a strange feeling that he couldn't do anything to help it. She was a strangerWhat could he do?

He pushed back the feeling that he could still try to comfort her, he took the easier route and muttered something about "going to the bathroom" as he stood up. En didn't answer, as expected, and he slipped out of the room.

I've got no time for trivialities,

Blaine stood in the hallway, dumbstruck that he seemed to be kicked out of his own compartment without the other person saying practically anything to him, before whipping out his phone to call Kurt. He answered on the first ring.

"Blaine! What the he-"

"Kurt, babe, I'm sorry I had to hang up. The person I'm sharing a compartment with just walked in and scared me for a moment,"

"Well you scared me,"

"I'm sorry,"

"It's fine... it's just nice to know you're not murdered,"

Blaine chuckled nervously as he recalled that was the same thing he was thinking mere minutes ago. "I'm fine,"

"Good, cause your death would kinda put a damper on things"

"Nice to know," he smiled.

"Alright. Now for the last time tonight, I love you, now go to sleep, and I'll pick you up at the station tomorrow morning."

I got a whole lot of things to tell her,

"Love you too," he spoke just as he hung up, letting another surge of homesickness roll over him.

When I get home.

He leaned quietly against the door and sighed deeply. Usually, Blaine would be more than willing to try to comfort an upset girl that he had to share a room with for the next 16 hours, but he was just so tired and sick and couldn't find it in his bones to care all that much. Reciprocating what En had been doing just moments ago, he closed his eyes and leaned his head back onto the door. The only thing different was that he was interrupted within ten seconds by a frail old lady with an enormous cart of drinks.

"Sorry hun, are you in this room?" she squeaked, nodding to the door.

"Oh, um, yeah sorry," and without really thinking, he hastily opened it, revealing En still in the position when he left, although now she quickly sat up, eyes more red than ever.

The lady spoke to Blaine when she asked "Do you or your girlfriend want something to drink?"

He opened his mouth to correct her but En cut him off with a croaky voice and two words.

"Black tea?"

The lady looked shocked at En's appearance, the filthiness as well as the white, but nodded and bent down to go through her cart before asking, "and you?"

"Just some coffee," he answered shyly.

Within seconds, he was holding a scalding hot cup, practically sighing aloud into the touch. But when the old lady moved on in the hallway, Blaine realised he was once again alone with En, and the tension was back.

However, it was only him who seemed to notice it, for she was sipping her tea slowly, and letting out a closed eyed sigh. Blaine just stared at her. She couldn't be too much older than him, yet she seemed completely alien.

"You're welcome to stay..." she spoke softly, her voice only slightly wavering. It was the first time that Blaine noticed that she had a subtle southern accent.

He felt a twinge of irritation. It's not like he needed her permission to stay.

"I know you don't," she smirked slightly. Waithe didn'say that out loud did he?

His eyes narrowed at her, as though she was lying about something, and suddenly, he didn't trust her. With both hands on his cup of coffee, he tried to sit down without spilling it; it was a challenge considering the constant rumble and shaking of the train.

Come on, let me through,
I've got so many things, I've got to do,

They looked across at each other for a few seconds in silence, Blaine feeling oddly intimidated by a dirt-covered, tear-streaked, red-eyed, albino girl.

"My name's Blaine," he spoke.

She pressed her lips together and nodded, but didn't respond. His irritation morphed into accusation when he saw her eyes drift towards the window, completely ignoring Blaine.

I've got no business being here with you

"Why don't you talk at all?"

Her own grey eyes narrowed now, glaring into Blaine's hazel. "I'm not going to talk if I don't have anything to say," she retorted before turning back to the window, leaving Blaine still captivated.

"Are you saying that you don't have anything to say?" he questioned, eyes gleaming with curiosity.

She glared at him, but stayed silent.

"Why did you rush into the compartment when you boarded?" he asked, not really knowing why he was pushing the limits with person questions. It wasn't like him at all. Then again, he reminded himself, he hadn't been Blaine all night.

"I was running late," she answered stiffly but without hesitating.

"Why?" Blaine smirked, feeling pleased that she was uncomfortable. But his satisfaction vanished instantly as her saw tears well up in her swirling eyes.

"That doesn't concern you," she spat, her voice cracking slightly on the you.

He looked at her shocked for a moment before finding his voice once more. "Oh god, I..." he stammered over his words. "I.. why.. why are you crying?"

She pushed her white bangs to the side, pulling out a leaf in the process, before crinkling it in her pale fingers as she answered, "The regular reasons that people cry. I'm sad... I'm scared... I'm angry...I'm confused... I hate- " She suddenly choked on her own words and tears, lifting her hands so they covered her nose and mouth. Blaine felt awful as he watch a few tears roll down her dirty cheeks.

"Oh god, I'm sorry," he walked over to her and attempted to put a comforting arm around her filthy shoulder, but she didn't lean into him, making the position extremely awkward, not to mention he was still trying not to spill the burning coffee in his right hand.

"Don't apologize Blaine," she murmured through her hands, before lifting her face once more. He raised his eyes at his own name, surprised by the weird intimacy of it. "It just sucks for you that you're at the wrong place at the wrong time."

Neither of the two of them knew how wrong that sentence truly was.

Blaine retracted his arm from around her helplessly, but the awkwardness seemed to be clearing a bit. "I've had a bad week, too," he spoke quietly.

She snorted into the sip of tea she had been taking and coughed a bit before smiling coldly at him. "'Betcha mine was worse."

"Enlighten me,"

Her eyes narrowed again, clearly unsure. "Gentlemen first," she practically cooed.

Blaine, now enjoying the conversation's atmosphere, got up and walked again to his couch. He looked curiously across at En. Her eyes were still bloodshot from the tears, but the grey-blue shine was overpowering. She smiled slyly, but not in a flirtatious way. Oddly enough, it was right then that he realized how incredibly beautiful she was, dirt covered or not.

"Well, I took a train out to the middle of nowhere," he started, only to be interrupted.

"Utah." She stated.

"I thought you only spoke when you had something to say?" he shot back cleverly. "All you did was repeat what I had already said."

En furrowed her eyebrows but smiled. "You just called my home state "the middle of nowhere". I was correcting you."

Blaine shrugged, still enjoying the back and forth. "Anyway, I went to Utah for the week to go look at a college that I know I don't want to go to, had to endure a bunch of homop-" he stopped short. If this girl's from Utah, whose to say she's not just as much as a homophobe as anybody else.

There was a short silence before En caught on and spoke quickly, "Oh! It's cool I know you're gay."

"What? Wait.. how would yo-"

"Last time I checked, Kurt is a name given to baby boys. And unless you just really care about your best friend, than he seems to be your boyfriend."

Blaine gaped at her. The only time he had even mentioned Kurt in the room is when he was blurting a goodbye to him before hanging up the phone after she first ran in. "And.. and you're okay with that?"

She furrowed her white eyebrows closer again, "Don't judge us all on a few homophobes that you encountered. I'll have you know that I am quite liberal" she said, pointing at him on the work 'quite'.

"Well, yeah. I had to deal with those guys, which just pisses me off. And I was away from my boyf- Kurt, which is awful, cause I love him." He watched En raise an eyebrow, but ignored it, unsure of what to think. "And I pretty much just wasted one of my last weeks of summer vacation being miserable and alone."

En stared blankly at him for a few seconds, before sitting back on the couch, and looking at the window once more.

Blaine, in return, leaned forward. "Is that all? You're not going to say anything else?"

She met his gaze again with the smallest hint of a "bitch-please" look that reminded him achingly of Kurt as she spoke, "I won."

"What?"

"I won. I had the worse week."

"Prove it," he challenged. "For all I know, you could be lying."

"But I'm not," she replied simply.

"And you expect me to trust and believe that your telling the truth?"

"No," she answered. "But I know it's true, so what else do I need?"

Blaine frowned.

"En?"

"Mmm?" she hummed, her voice seeming strained. He could tell that she was uncomfortable again, now that she was the topic of the conversation.

"We still have 15 hours and 45 minutes left on this train. Please tell me about your week."

She looked at him for a while, eyes glassy and cautious. "I don't really want to do this."

"Do what?"

"Have this cliche thing where I vent all my problems to some guy that I only just met on a train and won't ever see again."

"So you admit you have problems," he smirked.

She shifted again in her seat, looking the teenist bit upset. "We all have problems Blaine,"

"Yes, but we all don't show up to our train ride right before it's about to depart while covered in dirt and lea-"

"My mom is dead."

I've got a whole lot of things to tell her

Blaine choked on his own words, stunned into silence. En was staring at his with wide eyes, looking like she had just let the combination to the president's safe slip out of her mouth. He tried desperately to say something but all that came out was "But.. but.. wha-"

"She's been sick for a couple months now.. and... and then she just died. I mean, she said goodbye, but it just happened so quickly and one day she was there and then it was 'BAM' and she was just... just gone."

En took a long breath after speaking so quickly, but still Blaine couldn't form a proper response by the time she had started back up again.

"It was awful. But that wasn't the worst, cause.. cause," she swallowed. "We fought. We never got along, but the last conversation I had with her was a fight. I was so angry, god, she just..." En trailed off again in emotion, but oddly enough, there were no tears. "She.. uhm... well, she was a single parent, raising me on her own. I always asked her who my dad was cause, well, I was curious, and I had a right to be!"

Her voice was becoming increasingly more steady, and she continued on, while Blaine felt like he could crumple under everything she was telling him.

"And then she would feed me these awful lies! And I knew they were lies just to get me to shut up. She once pointed to the TV screen while I was watching The Price Is Right, and told me the host was my father, and then just walked away. I'm not stupid! Did she expect me to believe that bullshit? Eventually, I tried to do research on my own, learned nothing! I knew nothing, and I hate not knowing!"

She paused a moment to catch her breath and Blaine tried to digest her last few thoughts.

"So I knew she was on her last few months, so I just... I needed to know. So I.. kinda.. cornered her. She still refused to tell me. Nineteenyears she was still trying to to hide who my father was from me. I figured he was a terrorist or in the mob, or just something horrible, but I needed to know! I couldn't just go through life not knowing! So I pressed her.. and … and...and she told me."

En paused again, taking a breath, and making Blaine realise he had been holding his own.

"She just wrote down a name and address and just... handed it over. Just like that. Told me he was in Ohio, or at least that was where they had met and hooked up. And when she had told him that she was pregnant... he left her for some other chick. Not that they were ever together, it was just some impulsive sex and... and I'm the result."

Finally, a choked sob came from her throat.

"I got angry... cause, well.. I don't want to be that. I don't want to be a m-mistake. And I started yelling, as though that would have magically made my birth intended. I know the past can't be changed, but it's... it's as though my whole life was just a mistake. I wanted … I wanted purpose! And I know that accidental pregnancies happen all the time but.. but I just wanted to be wanted and welcomed to- to the world."

"En.."

"And the last thing I said to her was to 'you're not my mother,'" she choked again.

"En."

"And then... and but that's not even the wor-"

"En!"

"WHAT?"

"C'mere" he spoke softly, holding out his arms for the trembling girl.

She just stared at him for a few seconds, before practically tackling him (dropping her cup of tea blatantly on the floor as she did so) but he caught her firmly with the hand that wasn't occupied, and held her to his chest as she let out sob after sob. She was clutching his waist so hard that it hurt, but he held on tightly, whispering her name over and over. He even surprised himself when he felt his own hot tears running down the sides of his face. Blaine waited patiently for the sobs to devolve into hiccups before letting his grip loosen enough for her to look him in the eye.

"I didn't want to do that," she whispered, looking more vulnerable than ever, with her red eyes and frizzy hair.

"But didn't it feel good?" he smiled.

She furrowed her eyebrows one again. "I don't think so.."

It was his turn to frown. "Well," he sighed. "I can assure you that you had the worst week."

He watched her blue eyes look at him carefully, as though she had more to say, but didn't have enough energy to open her mouth. In lieu of speaking, she dropped her head back to his chest and gave him a strong hug. He squeezed her back in return.

Feeling another body this close wasn't something he was used too- apart from Kurt. But while Kurt was warm and inviting, En seemed to radiate coldness. It wasn't painful, but … differentExhilarating almost. Not in an attractive way, but in a way that made him want to pull her closer, as though to warm her up.

The realisation hit his soundly.

He was snuggling with a stranger. Snuggling. With. A. Stranger. He expected panic to strike him yet again, but it didn't arrive. Instead, he felt a strange wave of protectiveness even though he didn't know, much less trust, the women. Strange.

"Hey En?"

"Mmm"

"Can you please tell me your real name?"

"It's En," she spoke, turning her head to the side so she wasn't speaking into his shirt.

"Why En?"

"It's short for Eleanor. And it's my initials.."

"Initials?"

"Mmm. Eleanor Newbury," she answered.

"Hello Eleanor Newbury. My name is Blaine Warbler Anderson," he replied.

"Pshh," she mumbled. "You just had to add the middle name"

"Of course," he grinned as he felt her smile into his chest.

"Eleanor Hummel Rigby,"

Woah.

"Hummel?" he asked casually, hoping she couldn't feel his heart speeding up.

She lifted her head, her eyes concerned, although not crying any longer. "Yeah. I always though my mom just thought it was pretty, god knows what I was thinking, but it's actually my dads last name."

Nope. Nope. Not possible. Can't be happening. No.

"Oh?," he chuckled loosely. " Well, what's his first name?"

She sat up further, so she was no longer touching him. Slowly, she slid back to her side of the compartment, still wiping her eyes nonchalantly as she answered with unsure eyes and a hint of a scowl, "It's... Burt."

Blaine swallowed.

"Oh."

When I get home

 

End Notes: Gasp! And SORRY, I changed this chapter.. again. I just found this song the day after I posted it, and I didn't like the idea of having the first chapter not reflect the Beatles at all so I changed it. Because I CAN! Therefore I will ;)I hope it was enjoyable. I'll be posting a second chapter fairly soon- next Sunday at the very latest. Please shoot a review if you can; I want to hear your thoughts!Love, Hann

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