May 18, 2012, 4:38 p.m.
Everything Changes: Chapter 3
T - Words: 2,109 - Last Updated: May 18, 2012 Story: Closed - Chapters: 4/? - Created: Jan 19, 2012 - Updated: May 18, 2012 604 0 1 0 0
"Do you like him?" Blaine asked during their lunch break Monday. He'd spent what remained of his weekend locked up in his apartment wondering what kind of idiot he was for showing up in New York and automatically assuming that he could make things right with Kurt. The fact that he was shocked that Kurt had found a boyfriend, has possibly found other boyfriends before was his biggest mistake. Because really, who wouldn't want Kurt?
"Who? Joshua?" Rachel said picking at her salad with a fork.
"Yeah," Blaine said trying to act like asking about Kurt's boyfriend was a casual question and not one he'd been dying to text to Rachel all weekend. Because who would be a better judge of the person that Kurt was dating than his best friend.
"Oh. Uh-I set them up," Rachel said and Blaine couldn't quite decided if he had actually heard the touch of guilt in her voice.
"Oh," Blaine said not looking at her.
"He deserves to be happy Blaine," Rachel said looking at him despite his eyes being focused on the tray in front of him.
"Of course," Blaine said moving to look at Rachel, "I know."
"Even if it's with you," Rachel said slyly a smile playing at the corners of her mouth.
Blaine looked at Rachel, hopeful, scared, confused.
"Look, Blaine. He walked away from Dalton with a smile on his face. A month later, I could barely get the light in his eyes to flicker. I don't really know what happened. But you hurt him."
"I'm well aware."
"Look, Blaine. I like you, I always have. But I can't fault Kurt if he doesn't forgive you," Rachel said as hurt and disappointment flashed in Blaine's eyes, "But I'm going to tell you what I told him. There's a reason that you're here. And I don't mean New York because that had always been what you wanted. But there is a reason that you ended up in my show and we both ended up outside the day Kurt was supposed to meet me for lunch."
"You're saying this is fate?"
"Maybe," Rachel sang, "Look, what I'm really saying is that, if anything, all of this means that the two of you will get some closure. You both deserve it."
Blaine sighed. He knew he should be happy with closure. But there was a nagging feeling in his head, and in his heart, that knew that, at least for Blaine, closure was going to be impossible.
"Hello?" Blaine answered his phone without checking the caller ID as he stumbled into his apartment with a few bags of groceries.
"I'm being forced to invite you to this dinner thing Joshua is having this weekend," said the voice on the other end.
"Kurt?" Blaine asked nearly dropping his bags before getting them to the counter safely.
"Expecting someone else?"
"No," Blaine said, "But I definitely wasn't expecting you."
Kurt had had his number for years, and yet the first time he'd used it in five years had been to extend an invite on behalf of his boyfriend. Exactly what he was being invited to Blaine wasn't sure. He was too busy on the fact that Kurt still had his number.
"Can you come or not Blaine?" Kurt sounded irritated on the other end of the phone.
"Uh-What exactly is this?"
Kurt sighed, "Joshua thinks you're going to have all these stories to tell about high school, all these stories about me. He wants you to come over so you can tell him all the things he thinks Rachel and I aren't telling him. Rachel and I-we just don't talk about high school."
"Why?"
"Because we just want to put that part of our life behind us. Almost everything about Lima is nothing but a distant memory."
"And you want me to tell him all about high school?"
"I want you to tell him about Glee Club and Nationals. J-Just don't mention anything about us."
"Us? Joshua doesn't know you and I were together."
"No. And I'd like to keep it that way."
"Why?"
"Because I would. Rachel will be there but I can tell Joshua that you couldn't make it if you don't feel comfortable. He's just going to ask to reschedule though because he's very adamant about finding out what I was like in high school."
"I'm still not sure I understand what you've pseudo asked me to do."
"Tell him the same stories I've been telling him and then he'll stop trying to get me to tell him stories that don't exist."
"You know this sounds insane right?"
"I don't care Blaine. Yes or no?"
"Fine. I'm not sure who exactly I'm doing this for, but fine."
"Thank you. I have to go. I guess I'll see you Saturday."
"Yeah, see you."
The call ended and Blaine couldn't do much else other than throw himself onto the couch. He'd been waiting for years for Kurt to call him. For the name on the display to read Kurt with a little heart next to it like it had in high school. Over time he'd removed the heart, but never the number. He'd spent many nights scrolling aimlessly through his contacts only to stop over Kurt ever time, his thumb poised above begging to just tap the screen and make the call. But after a long moment he put his phone back down on the nightstand and tried to sleep.
For a month after David's funeral every time his phone rang, Blaine hoped it was Kurt. Kurt had always been the brave one so maybe Kurt would have it in him to make the phone call to put them back together. But the call never came and eventually Blaine resigned to the fact that Kurt didn't really want to be with him again, and he tried to move on.
But now, three years later, Kurt had called, and it was nothing like he'd wanted or dreamed about.
But Kurt still had his number, or maybe Rachel had given it to him, but Blaine wanted to think that the contact had been put in his phone a very long time ago. Back in a day where they both were in love.
"Do you think this was a good idea?" Blaine asked Rachel for the third time as they both walked through the crowded New York streets towards Joshua's apartment.
No. Blaine answered internally for as many times as he'd asked. He watched Rachel's optimism play on her face, not exactly listening to her answer. There was something not right about the whole situation that was bound to go poorly. Somehow Blaine was supposed to have dinner with Joshua, Kurt and Rachel with the pure intention of Joshua questioning Blaine about Kurt, a past Kurt. Why Kurt had agreed to this was beyond Blaine's comprehension. But the kicker about the whole thing, Joshua was never to know that Blaine and Kurt had been together. He could speak of Dalton, maybe, and their brief time there. But if he couldn't speak truthfully of his relationship with Kurt, the story kind of ended the moment Kurt sang Blackbird. It ended the moment he'd found what he'd been searching for forever; the moment he was moved by everything that was Kurt Hummel. Every story he told about the moments after would hold a hint of an untruth that Blaine wasn't sure he could lie about.
How could he talk about his time with Kurt without speaking of the love they had? It was an unfair and unfathomable task.
Yet as Blaine and Rachel approached Joshua's apartment, he realized that he'd agreed to do the unfathomable. Why? Because Kurt had asked? Because he thought some how doing this for Kurt give him an opportunity to talk to Kurt?
He would find a way to describe his past, to describe Kurt without himself. Essentially, Blaine was helping Kurt erase Blaine from his life. Blaine's heart broke and his anger rose a little at the thought.
"Are you even listening to me?" Rachel questioned as she knocked on Joshua's door.
"No," Blaine said aloud, "sorry."
Dinner was awkward. Joshua spent most of their meal talking about his work. Everything he was doing was on the verge of exploding with success and he made sure that everyone knew it. Blaine spent of a lot of the time ignoring him while continuing to wonder why he was doing this. He still wasn't entirely sure but he was here and maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Maybe Joshua would just keep talking about himself.
They were sitting later in Joshua's living room drinking coffee when the first question shot from Joshua's mouth.
"So Blaine, you met Kurt and Rachel in high school?"
Everything before Blackbird is the truth Blaine reminded himself, "I met Kurt when he came to spy on the Glee club at Dalton Academy, where I was a student."
"A spy huh?" Joshua questioned giving Kurt a smirk that made Blaine shift uncomfortably in his seat on Joshua's couch.
"You can blame Noah Puckerman for that, "Kurt added, "But I wasn't a very good spy. They caught me pretty quick."
"Well you looked terribly out of place," Blaine said, "And Wes and David seemed infatuated with you."
"Infatuated?" Joshua questioned, "Why?"
Blaine had had this conversation before. He had told Kurt about Wes and David and their obsession with Kurt mostly due to what David kept referring to as the "eye sex" but the most interested they became the more obvious it was that Kurt wasn't a new student with a forgotten blazer.
"Wes and David loved to joke around. They were fully prepared to send him on a scavenger hunt for the lost relics of Dalton. Which don't exist by the way."
"But they were so polite when I met them after that," Kurt said with a laugh. Was that even real?
"I called them off. If they had their way, that conversation would have gone a completely different way."
Blaine's thoughts turned to his best friends. A tug at his heart for David and a mental note to call Wes later.
"And you both stayed in touch after the botched spy mission?"
How much, if anything had Kurt told Joshua about the bullying? Did Joshua know that Kurt had transferred to Dalton to escape Dave Karofsky and a school full of tormentors? Did Kurt want Joshua to know about that part of his life? If he was writing his past, why wouldn't Kurt get rid of the biggest blemish on his high school years?
"Uh," Kurt said and Blaine could see the wheels turning in Kurt's head as he decided what would be truth and what would stay hidden, "We saw each other at Glee competitions. We tied with them junior year at sectionals and then beat them at regionals. And then senior year we beat them at regionals."
"So there must have been some animosity between the two of you?" Joshua said moving a pointed finger between Kurt and Blaine.
Only because I left him crying in the rain Blaine thought.
"We've always been nothing but friendly," Kurt said.
And there it was. Blaine had suddenly gone from Kurt's everything to nothing but an acquaintance he'd seen a handful of times. A huge part of Blaine's life rewritten, two years of Blaine's life rewritten to fit Kurt's new life and his new boyfriend. Blaine glanced at Kurt who was looking at Rachel and wondered how Kurt could do this? How could he sleep at night knowing that he'd just eliminated from his own reality something so special? Blaine felt his temper start to flare again.
"I have to go," Blaine announced standing up from the couch, "I've got an early day tomorrow."
Great, more lies.
Joshua's phone rang on the table in front of them. He glanced at the caller ID, "I have to take this. It's work. Kurt, can you show Blaine out?"
Kurt nodded and stood up and followed Blaine to the door and then into the hallway before closing the door behind them.
"Uh, thanks Blaine."
"Yeah."
"You're angry."
"Of course I'm angry, Kurt," Blaine said with hushed anger, "I just agreed and allowed you to remove almost everything that happened in your life during high school from reality."
"I just want to forget about all of that," Kurt said, "and I don't even know why you care."
Blaine knew that Kurt was trying to get his own digs in on Blaine. Because Blaine had made a few mistakes he couldn't possibly care could he?
"That's fine. But you can't expect me to be okay with this. If you want to lie to him about what makes you, you and be okay with hit that's fine with me. But I don't have to be comfortable with it."
"It's for the best," Kurt said his voice barely above a whisper.
"You want to write me out? Great. I'll just take myself out of the present and we can just completely forget the past."
"Blaine-," Kurt started.
"Goodbye Kurt," Blaine said leaving Kurt in the hallway never once looking back.
Comments
Every freaking chapter made me cry! Why does this story not have more reviews! You have a really good knack for writing! I love this so much! Can't wait for the next update! :)