"I wanted it to stop. The pain was exhausting. I couldnt handle it. The constant buzzing that just wouldnt stop, persistently pressing against my skull as if it was ready to burst from within. The pressure was too much for me to deal with. I needed to find a way to let it all go, to just forget and drain my emotions. I found my solution easily. Physical pain was easier to live with than the mental trauma. I had to hide it from everyone, no one could know what was happening. They wouldnt understand how much it helped me cope, they would try to help and I would be back where I was; battling with my minds demons, waiting for myself to shatter. I cannot go back to that."

Kurt was worried, more than worried.

Two months of persistence had not paid off in the slightest. He had tried many times to talk to Blaine, but the boy closed up more every time. There wasnt anything that Kurt could do to help him by approaching Blaine on the topic, it only pushed his student further away. The faculty didnt help matters either. Kurt was in the principals office at least every second day trying to figure out a way that might help Blaine, but it was no use. It seemed that Blaine was a completely different person in his other classes and everyone presumed that Kurt was being paranoid because of his own past experiences.

Kurt knew he was right to be worried. That much was confirmed when he found another piece of writing left on his desk, much like the other ones that he had found every week for the past two months. They each progressed slowly, but they were getting darker as time went on, Kurt could feel depression seeping through the words. He knew that he had to do everything possible to help his student.

It was the last class of the day when Jeff approached Kurt. He too was getting incredibly worried about his friend. Blaine was no longer participating in the impromptu performance battle. Jeff didnt either, but only because there didnt seem to be the same thrill as there used to be. Whats the fun in continuing a war when your battle partner has already surrendered?

Blaine didnt audition for solos anymore, just kept to himself in the background. Over the past two months, Blaines change in behaviour was now becoming really obvious to all his friends.

"Look, I know I sound paranoid, but I know what its like for people like Blaine and I, we are treated differently. People just dont get that this isnt how we chose to live. I went through hell before I came to Dalton, so I could only guess that Blaine went through something similar."

Kurt nodded in understanding. "Jeff, you dont sound paranoid. You have every right to be worried about your friend. Maybe, if you told me the reasons you are worried, I might be able to help."

Jeff let out a sigh of relief and lent back in his chair he had pulled up in front of Kurts desk. He had thought that no one would listen. No one usually did. Even though Dalton was a school that was accepting of everyone, it was still just as hard to have your voice heard unless you were being bullied by someone at the school. Jeff had a feeling that wasnt the case for Blaine.

"Well, he doesnt talk as much as he used to. He was always the one in the group that we couldnt shut up, but now he barely says a word, he just sits there with his laptop and writes. I know thats his way of dealing with everything; whether its homework stress, Warbler pressure, whatever. I dont think he realises how much I actually pay attention to him."

Kurt thought over what Jeff said for a moment. Even he knew writing was Blaines way of dealing with anything that he couldnt handle mentally, so it only made sense that his friends knew that too.

"What about in class?" Kurt asked, wondering why no one else was doing anything to help if Blaine was obviously not coping. "Other than English, that is."

Jeff hadnt thought about that before. "Well, he doesnt seem to be acting any differently in his other classes, but then hes never been as involved in them as he has been in English in the past. Up until this year, Blaine had always been really enthusiastic and included himself in all the class discussions. I never really thought too much about it, thinking that this year he needed to focus on his writing. Hes always had weird ways of focussing on things, but how hes acting now isnt just his way of keeping himself from getting distracted."

Kurt nodded, indicating that he knew Jeff was right, Blaine wasnt simply trying to distract himself, there was something else going on and Blaine was suffering. "Does Blaine ever talk about his past? What his life was like before Dalton?"

"Everyone thats close to Blaine knows that he was bullied severely before he came to Dalton. He transferred about half way through the year, but applications arent usually accepted at that time, so we all knew that there were special circumstances. I dont know that much of what happened, but I know he went through more than I did. He should have already graduated, but had to repeat a year."

Thinking over what Jeff had said, Kurt couldnt help but think that for Blaine to miss a whole year of school, he must have had a very rough time before Dalton. "He didnt talk to anyone about what happened?"

"Not to me, I didnt know him well until the end of sophomore year. He and his roommate were always really close, they still are. Hes probably the closest person to Blaine that I know."

"Who is his roommate?"

Jeff let out a scoff, half way between a chuckled and a sound of distaste. "Sebastian Smythe."