Chapter 12:

"When you're Blaine, I think you are the hope that's left in this world."

The words hung heavy in the whispery air, paused and charged against the increasing dawn. Kurt stood stock still, his lips brushing against his lord's neck as he breathed his last sentence into the dark curls. He didn't know what the next move was but he knew it wasn't his to make. His last hand had been played.

So he continued to wait, watching intently as the muscles in the other man's shoulders sunk a little lower but the face remained rigidly averted.

Blaine felt like he was dissolving; like he was simply a collection of molecules that had been held together by a flimsy and fabricated membrane all these years and now the seal had broken. Kurt had added the first tear the moment he'd appeared on the stairs and had been gradually slicing away at it inch by inch until this very moment.

"When you're Blaine I think you're the hope in this world."

Hope. Hope was such an unfamiliar word to Blaine. Success. Power. These were words he understood, but hope? Even as a Lord, distant and removed from most of it, Blaine knew the world as it stood was bleak and desolate for the masses. Poverty and desperation clawed at ever door and not even the ice white purity of the constant snow that shrouded their state could mask the rotting decay at the core of their society. He'd seen hopeful faces; had seen tiny flickers of light behind eyes as they appealed to a goodness in humanity that Blaine didn't believe existed. He'd also watched that hope dim and lose its sheen as more and more cruelty was dealt out by the Lords. He swallowed thickly, pain burning in his throat. Cruelty dealt out by his father. His contemporaries. Himself.... 

"When you're Blaine I think you're the hope in this world."

He wanted to ask how? Wanted to demand an explanation from Kurt. How? How was he ‘hope'? What did it mean?....But instead he felt himself crack. At Kurt's final words, Blaine Anderson disintegrated. Every shred of remaining fight, or malice or whatever weaknesses collected together to make up his physiology evaporated into the air as each molecule dispersed. Tears spilled down his cheeks, unhindered and unchecked like melting snow coursing down the window pane.

Kurt watched the shoulders tremble in front of him and felt the sobs that wracked his Lord's body as if they were his own. Instinct told him to reach out, to close the remaining gap that separated them but his damaged heart, damaged from days of neglect and rejection and pain, wouldn't quite give in. Instead he stood, slightly helpless, and watched the other man fall apart from behind. He needed Blaine to make the move; needed Blaine to seek the comfort that he was so willing - so desperate, to give. The fact that he craved the Lord's touch wasn't lost on him. but he'd moved beyond questioning it now. They'd moved beyond everything now.

Feeling like a trail of dominos, delicately constructed and on the edge of demolition, Blaine closed his eyes and allowed himself to surrender to the quiet breaths and ever present scent of Kurt all around him. This was the tipping point; the point of release, and it startled him how much he longed for the loss of control. In his brain, Lord Anderson lifted his thumb and forefinger and flicked at the first domino. Blaine took a deep, shuddering breath and turned around.

Their eyes locked for a second, both watery and bright, blown wide with fear and longing and something that neither man could quite identify but that Blaine thought perhaps might have been hope. Lips hovered inches from each other and short breaths ghosted over tingling skin as they waited., both waiting for the other to make the signal to move. The knowledge that this needed to be a mutual move, needed to be equal, flickered in both eyes silently and feeling like he was standing on the edge of a precipice ready to leap, Blaine moved forward a fraction of an inch before stopping. Waiting. The same fear twitched in Kurt's brain before he swallowed it down. Looking up tentatively through his thick wet lashes, Kurt leaned forward and bridged the final gap.

Their lips were gentle this time. Devoid of the push and pull of dominance that Blaine had previously established, both boys were tentative, exploring the still slightly chapped skin of each other's damaged flesh but feeling it tingle as if charged.

There was so much that still needed to be said, so much to learn and understand but in that moment each man needed skin, and blood and muscle and warmth; words would come later. For now, they let their touches speak, apologies and understanding tattooed into lips and breath and heat pressed against heat.

Blaine was hesitant, kissing back but for the first time reluctant to push forward into the desire. His lips remained closed, pliable and yielding to Kurt's delicious pressure. It was Kurt's tongue that slid across his Lord's lips and gently sucked the bottom one between his teeth, nibbling softly and eliciting a low moan of need from the other man. It was Kurt's warm thumb that softly traced circles against his cheek and drew Blaine's mouth tighter against him, and it was Kurt who finally, after pulling back slightly and allowing the Lord to see the dark want in his dilated eyes, licked his way between the lips and poured fire into his mouth.

The final insistent push of Kurt's tongue against his teeth sent Blaine over the edge, the overwrought tension in his body spilling out into a desperate, anguished groan of need as he allowed the other man access.

The response was immediate and violent and Kurt found himself crushed against his Lord's chest as the other man grasped him in his arms, knocking the air out of his lungs as he clung to Kurt's tingling skin. Blaine's tongue surged against his, pushing both into Kurt's mouth and plunging his way into the aching heat. Something shifted inside Kurt and a dark throb of desire sparked through him. There would be no submission tonight. This was raw and desperate and the newly awakened thirst for pleasure that Blaine promised powered the other man onward. Grabbing hold of his Lord's collar, he fisted the material into his hands, forcing the full weight of his previously hidden muscles against him and propelled them both backwards against the wall.

Blaine hit the crimson plaster with an "ungff", the two bodies slamming against the side of the wardrobe as they clawed at each other's clothing. Kurt's mouth had latched onto Blaine's neck, sucking his pulse into his mouth and staining the skin a wine red. Stuttered breaths were gasped out of his master's lips as the former sub's tongue lathed across fiery skin and each uncontrolled whimper seemed to send a relentless beat of dark desire coursing through Kurt's blood. It compelled him, commanded him onwards with a control he'd never knew he possessed. He felt possessed now; embodied by some strange power that disregarded all logic and reason and as his Lord moaned again under another administration, an alien and animalistic sound ripped from Kurt's throat.

Blaine was consumed; felt like he was drowning under the broken dam of his Sub's unleashed desire. He'd never allowed another to overpower him, had never been trapped, a prisoner in another man's arms - and yet he yearned for this; had surrendered instantly to the force as Kurt mastered him. He panted against the wall, fingers clawing at the embossed paper beneath him as each lick of Kurt's tongue against his neck and lips and jaw sent his body deeper into submission. This was utterly new and terrifying and yet he wanted it all. Every time Kurt forced his body over him, Lord Anderson felt more of his desire pooling at his Sub's feet.

Kurt's hands had now grasped at Blaine's shirt, rucking the fabric up against his back so he could feel the slippery heat of the muscles beneath. Fingernails scratched welts into the pliant flesh and each new drag elicited a broken gasp from the man below him. Feeling himself beginning to lose a grip on reality, Kurt wrenched his lips away from Blaine's, dragging himself off and backwards until he could feel air between them. He stood, panting; both men's fractured gasps being the only sounds that were audible in the silence of the early morning.

Attempting to get his breath and regain control of his turbulent desire, Kurt watched the other man intently. Blaine's eyes had been closed, head thrown back against the damask wall and body splayed out in unquestionable surrender. He looked wrecked; no semblance of the Lord remained as Kurt roved his eyes possessively across his marked neck and collar, the obvious branding of each suck and bite blending with the bruised colour of the wallpaper.

A strange moment of lucidity washed over him as he wondered whether he'd intended to mark him all along; whether in doing so he'd been subconsciously wanting to hurt his Lord, but as Blaine finally blinked his eyes open in his confused, lust-filled haze, Kurt knew that wasn't it. It wasn't to hurt or punish. It was a way to make sure Blaine couldn't forget. Not this moment, not this surrender, not this change. Even if Lord Anderson returned and all this seemed like a dream, Kurt knew Blaine would only need look in a mirror to remember. Remember that at one point he allowed himself to let go.

The hazel eyes found his, bright and darkly wanton in the filtered light slicing through the curtain. There was a colour in them Kurt had never seen. A current of electricity coursing under the tanned skin making his body seem to pulse with want. There was a question in them now. A searching, slightly vulnerable appeal for more; more of everything Kurt had to give.

Blaine's body felt naked, exposed and raw under the haze of lust and desire as he locked eyes with Kurt's. The other man's pale skin seemed to glow under the ice white illumination from the rising sun and his hair stuck up wildly after their aggressive assault. Blaine found his gaze drawn to the rosy lips, wet and swollen from their desperate kisses and watched in ill-concealed awe as they parted with tiny stuttered breaths as Kurt struggled to gain control. He wanted him. Wanted to crush those lips beneath his again and feel the racing pulse of the other man's blood as it throbbed beneath him. He wanted to feel the press of that body against his, surprisingly strong and powerful and entirely possessive in its need. But none of this startled him. Blaine had known desire before. He'd known want and the aching pursuit of relief; had known men and the longing for the stretch and slide of hot flesh. He'd even known Kurt; pliant and yielding and completely open to be claimed ... but he'd never known this. He'd never known fear mingled with desire; never known how exciting it felt to feel powerless and consumed. Blaine had never known what it felt like to want to give up control and just feel protected, worshipped - loved? And he wanted it now; looked at Kurt and his quivering body and twitching muscles and truly wanted to feel him everywhere. Fear surged through him as he realised what he was really asking for. He knew he wasn't there yet; couldn't quite take that final step but the realisation that he desired it, yearned for it, made his stomach turn with a heady mixture of trepidation and fiery longing. Instead, he took a shaky breath into his lungs and flicked his gaze up to stare through his hooded lashed.

"Kurt ... ?"

The whispery sound of his name exhaled from his former Lord's lips galvanised him into action once again and he felt a rush of blood to his groin as Blaine's pleading eyes sought his. Stepping forward once more, Kurt pressed into Blaine's chest, pulling the boneless body into his arms and gently manoeuvring him away from the wall. His touch was calmer this time, still insistent in its firm pressure as he pushed Blaine back against the bed, but no longer so urgent and frantic. This time each man seemed intent on exploring and discovering the other, rather than simply the desperate pursuit of release. Bending down, he recaptured Blaine's lips beneath his own, savouring the heady contrast of the distant taste of coffee and something sweeter underneath. His fingers found their way to the buttons on his Lord's now crumpled black shirt, and he paused briefly, toying with the top one and drawing back again to breathe against Blaine's ear,

"I want 'you' this time." His tongue flicked against the earlobe and the other man shivered involuntarily, "You said last time I has to ask, so I'm asking. For you. For all of you."

Fear bubbled beneath his skin as he said the words, his inexperienced anxieties pushing themselves to the surface as he connected his eyes to his Lord's. It wasn't until the words had come out that he realised how true they really were. He willed Blaine to understand what he was asking. He willed lord Anderson to stay dormant. A tiny flicker of steeliness blinked across the hazel eyes before it vanished, Blaine once again rising to the surface as he pulled Kurt against him, both of them falling backwards on to the sheets. "You have me. You have me, Kurt." He whimpered into his neck, fingers dragging at Kurt's hair as he attempted to crush his lips even harder against Kurt's mouth, rutting up against the other man's hard body, searching for the intoxicating jolt of pleasure as Kurt's cock pressed him down further into the mattress. He didn't want to acknowledge the silent ‘for now' that he could hear nagging at the back of his brain, but when he looked up into the dark eyes of his Sub he could see the words hanging there too.

With another forceful thrust against each other, both men let whatever poison possessed them to take over. For a while all they were aware of was the uncovering of skin; as each item of clothing was carefully discarded they discovered fresh bruises and angry scratches from the night before and Kurt found himself slowing down as he administered tiny licks and kisses to the damaged flesh of Blaine's torso, enjoying the faint gasps and slight quivers each motion brought. He'd not seen his Lord like this; their previous time together had been exciting and dangerous, the thrill of the first-time possession something Kurt would never forget, but this time was so different. Blaine was beneath him, limp and boneless and as Kurt drew each item of clothing away from him, it seemed he was uncovering the boy beneath. As if in the removal of his costume, Blaine Anderson became real to him.

When they were both naked, Kurt moved himself alongside his Lord, both men pressed flush against each other but neither dominant. Blaine ran his hand along the full length of his Sub's side, tracing each rib before smoothing over the soft curve of his waist and resting on his hip. Kurt's eyes had closed under the caress and tiny whimpers breathed across Blaine's face as he dug his fingers in a little tighter, drawing their bodies together until they slotted into place like an erotic jigsaw puzzle. The connection made both men groan into the next kiss.

"I still don't know what I'm doing." Kurt whispered, embarrassment flushing his cheeks slightly. "I want to ... to ..." he trailed off, not sure how to articulate any of the desires running through him. Blaine smiled slightly, the first glimmer of the confident Lord coming back, and moved over Kurt, kissing along his collar bone and sliding his tongue down to lick teasingly into his belly button. Kurt moaned and writhed as Blaine mimicked a fucking motion with his probing tongue before beginning to sink even lower. His head was thrown backwards as he fisted the sheets in his hands, knowing what Blaine was about to do and trying desperately to stop himself from thrusting wildly up into his face. As if reading his mind, Blaine placed a firm hand against his hip before taking a tentative lick at the glistening head of Kurt's cock. The broken gasp that the action dragged from Kurt's throat made him grin, a small knowing smirk before he sank his lips down in one motion, over the full length.

Being a Lord, Blaine had never given a blow job before; he'd received of course. Many times; there was nothing more powerful to Blaine than watching another man sink to his knees in front of him and dutifully take everything Blaine had to give ... but this ... he'd wanted to taste Kurt the minute he'd seen him naked that first night; had licked his lips at the sight of his leaking, hard cock standing out so violently against the alabaster contours of his skin, and thought about what it would feel like on his tongue. It was a new desire for him and, at the time, had frightened him. But now, as he felt the heavy weight of Kurt's thick length filling his mouth, he knew why this was so intoxicating to him. Kurt had lost it above him; was thrashing on the bed and bucking fruitlessly up against Blaine's forceful hand trying to push himself deeper and deeper into the heat. Blaine hummed gently around his cock for a moment before taking a deep breath and swallowing hard.

"Shit. Fuck, Blaine!" Kurt screamed out a string of obscenities as he felt himself hit the back of his Lord's throat before Blaine pulled off coughing a little. "Fuck, are you ok?" Kurt gasped, struggling to sit up a little and look down at Blaine who was now smiling up at him through thick lashes and pulling him back into place. "Where do you think you're going?" he murmured darkly before licking up a droplet of pre-cum that had spilled from the tip of Kurt's now almost purple cock. Kurt's worried expression vanished as he acknowledged the slightly hoarse croak to his Lord's voice, and the realisation that his own cock had caused it nearly made him come there and then. "Please, Blaine ...oh god ... just, please su -" He was cut off by Blaine sinking down over him yet again, instantly opening the back of his throat and taking the full length down into the dark wet heat. Bobbing his head slowly, Blaine set up a relentless rhythm that had Kurt screaming into the pillow as he bucked up against the seductive lips. The tingling pressure building up in his stomach was little warning for the orgasm that he knew was fast approaching and he tugged, slightly panicked on Blaine's dark curls as he tried desperately to hold it off and warn the other man. The sharp tug on his hair shot a bolt of fire straight into Blaine's own achingly hard cock and he let out an utterly broken groan as he rutted against the bed linen. The vibrations of the sound around his already throbbing length was the final push that sent Kurt over the edge, the force of his orgasm rocketing through both their bodies as he exploded into his Lord's mouth. Streams of thick come hit the back of Blaine's throat and he swallowed it down greedily, savouring the taste of Kurt and the wholly unfamiliar viscous slide of it as it trickled down. He hadn't intended to swallow particularly when he'd started; hadn't really thought about anything except his desperation to taste Kurt on his tongue and have him fall apart in his mouth, but when he'd felt the warning tug against his hair, he knew he wanted everything Kurt had to give and had welcomed it hungrily. He's barely even realised he'd come until he began to move back up Kurt's still shaking body and felt the stickiness of the sheets beneath him, his softening cock pressing against Kurt's hip as he collapsed beside the utterly spent man.

Kurt's eyes were screwed closed as the come-down from his orgasm washed over him. His body felt boneless and limp, entirely wasted, but alongside the heavy feeling of tiredness he was filled with a nervous fear. He didn't want to open his eyes; didn't want to see the anger and disgust in Lord Anderson's face that would inevitably be there at having had Kurt come in his mouth. As his breathing became a tiny bit more regular he blinked open his eyes to stare at the ceiling overhead, tracing the light as it glinted across the white plaster. He could feel Blaine watching him beside him, and the fact that he hadn't said anything yet seemed to be a reassuring sign. The fact that he hadn't moved away yet also seemed to indicate that perhaps Blaine was still there; still the boy that Kurt longed for and Kurt allowed himself a tiny sideways glance at the other man.

Blaine was watching him, softly hooded eyes sliding over his face with intrigue before turning away and fixing on the same spot Kurt had just been staring at. There was no anger there. Kurt wasn't sure what the look was but it wasn't anger that had greeted him. Silently, Kurt moved his arm down between them and felt Blaine shift onto his back. They both watched the morning creep overhead as their fingers sought each other across the sheets.

"I can't decide whether I'm a fallen angel or you're a reformed devil ..." Kurt whispered quietly into the air floating above their heads. Blaine blinked silently, letting the words wrap around them as somewhere below them the breakfast bell rang in a distant corridor. His fingers stroked against warm skin as the cupids ticked on the wall.

"Maybe we're just the space in between."

"What does that make us then?" Kurt murmured sleepily as his eyelids started to drift closed.

"I think it makes us human."