Kurt woke the next morning and laid in bed for a moment just thinking and waiting for... something. He glanced over in bed to find Cooper sleeping peacefully next to him. He stared at the ceiling for a long moment expected to feel different. Wasnt sex meant to change everything?

He had always pictured waking up and feeling happy and giddy, but instead he just felt lonely. He glanced back over at Cooper.

He didnt love him. The thought hit him out of the blue. He didnt love Cooper and he didnt really think Cooper loved him either.

Maybe that love would come in time, but... it didnt feel like it would. He liked Cooper a lot. He cared about him, but it wasnt anything more than that. Kurt bit his lip and tried not to cry before he got out of bed and went to take a long shower to collect his thoughts.

When he got back to the bedroom Cooper was up and yawning and pulling on a pair of sweatpants. Even after last night Kurt felt himself flush at the sight of Coopers bare backside.

"Morning Kurt." Cooper said turning to face him with a smile.

Kurt was drying his hair with a towel already dressed for the day, he returned Coopers smile then sat on the bed and crossed his legs.

"Cooper we need to talk." He said as Cooper rubbed his eyes and stretched. He was still shirtless and Kurt watched as his firm muscles stretched and flexed.

Kurt wondered what Blaine would look like in the same position and immediately buried his head in his hand. That was exactly the kind of thought he had hoped a night with Cooper would chase from his mind.

"Okay." Cooper said and plopped down next to him nudging him with his elbow. "Whats wrong? Was last night not... good?"

Kurt looked up at him and could tell from the smug look on Coopers face that he already knew the answer to that.

"Last night was good." Kurt confirmed though he left out the fact that he felt a little empty and lost this morning because of it. “We just need to talk about this movie deal you have, and you moving to California." Kurt had put this conversation on hold too long. They needed to figure this out.

"Oh, dont worry about that." Cooper said shrugging it off. "I have it all worked out."

"You do?" Kurt was surprised, maybe Cooper was more perceptive than he gave him credit for.

"Yeah, the studio knows I cant move for another 10 months. I can keep my permanent resident address in Westerville and still spend most of my time out there."

Kurt just stared at him incredulously. No, Cooper was in fact even less perceptive than he thought.

"And what about me?"

"Well..." Cooper said slowly like he was thinking it through, like he had never even considered how Kurt fit in these plans at all. "You can come out there with me as often as you want. I could show you around L.A. and the movie set and everything. It will be good for when we finally get to move out there."

Kurt had to take a deep breath to keep from yelling at Cooper and his obtuseness. Instead he closed his eyes and counted his breaths. "I have school here you know." He finally said.

"Its just community college and you do it correspondence. You can do that anywhere."

"Yes, for this first year and then I actually want to go to school Cooper."

"There are great schools in California."

"Cooper!" Kurt said springing from the bed. "New York, my plan was always to go to New York. You know that. And I knew that we were going to have to make some compromises, but you... you dont even care what I want. You expect me to just pack up and follow you wherever you go!"

"Kurt..." Cooper said obviously surprised at his outburst.

"No, how would you feel if I got us an apartment or something in New York City and expected you to just trot along behind me?"

Cooper stood too putting his hands on his hips and staring him down from the other side of the bed. "This is my dream Kurt, it has been since I was a kid. You want me to just give it up?"

"What about my dreams?" Kurt said throwing his hands out. "You want me to just give them up for you?"

"New York isnt a dream, its a place! You can study drama in California, it has really good schools!" Cooper was frustrated and his hands were shaking.

Kurt clenched his jaw, the fight draining out of him. Cooper didnt know. He didnt understand. He thought it was just about studying performing arts. Cooper didnt realize that New York was so much more than that to Kurt. And how could he know? Kurt had gone so long trying not to stir the water that he had never really talked to Cooper about it. Not that Cooper had gone out of his way to talk to Kurt either but still.

Kurts shoulders sagged. "No Cooper. New York, Broadway, the whole culture there that is my dream."

Cooper seemed to be calming down as well and he rubbed his hands down his face. "Well fuck." Cooper sat back down on the bed and Kurt joined him.

"We should have talked about this sooner."

"Yeah." Kurt agreed.

"So do you not want me to take this job?"

"No of course not. You have to take the job, I mean we have 10 months before we have to really do anything. You can commute like you were saying... just after that..." Kurt looked up at Cooper hopefully. "You can act from New York, lots of actors live in New York."

"All my connections are in L.A. I. I kind of love L.A."

"Right." Kurt said. "Great, thats only over 2,500 miles from where I want to be."

"And by law we have to live together." Cooper added.

Kurt tried to be offended by the fact that his husband would consider living across the country from him if he had the choice, but if Kurt was honest with himself, it was okay, he was thinking the same thing.

"I was trying to make this work between us you know." Cooper said.

Kurt nodded, "I know."

"Blaine said I should try and I did want to try."

Kurt could feel his cheeks heat up and his heart flutter pleasantly. "You… you were trying because of something Blaine said?"

"He keeps telling me how great you are and how I wasnt giving you a chance… and I didnt want to be like that."

Kurt tried to ignore the warm feeling those words gave him for Blaine and let out a long breath.

"So, okay where does this leave us?" Cooper asked.

"At an impasse."

"Well, we arent going to figure it out right now." Cooper said. "Let me think about it a little while okay? Think about New York, and well… well figure something out."

Kurt nodded again his heart lifting a little bit at the fact that Cooper would at least consider New York.

Cooper got up from the bed and headed towards the bathroom for a shower and Kurt went downstairs.

It was Saturday so Blaine would be home all day. Kurt hoped he was up, he really wanted to talk to Blaine, to see Blaine, to be around Blaine. He felt like he was coming apart at the seams and Blaine always somehow knitted him back together again.

But instead of Blaine he found a note on the kitchen counter.

"Out for coffee with Sebastian. Not sure when Ill be back."Kurt's heart shuddered in his chest.

He sat down on a bar stool and stared at the note, his eyes began to water and then he started to cry, he folding his arms on the counter and rested his head against them as the tears poured out of him. Of course he wasnt in love with Cooper, he was in love with Blaine.

Blaine had done everything in his power to steer clear of Kurt since Cooper got home from California and he heard… He heard things he wished he could rub out of his mind.

It was hard to avoid someone you lived with though. So Blaine spent more time at Dalton after school, and worked longer hours on Warbler routines and took Sebastian up on every offer to go out.

He and Sebastian hadnt moved past the making-out phase, not that Sebastian hadnt made his desires known, but Blaine didnt want that. Not yet at least, and not with Sebastian.

Blaine had gotten into the habit of turning up some piano music on his laptop before he went to bed each night so if there was anything to hear from the room down the hall he would be spared it. The worst part was that he knew he should be happy. Cooper and Kurt were the two most important people in his life, what kind of villain was he if he didnt want to see them happy together?

At first Blaine didnt think Kurt noticed that he was avoiding him, it just looked like he was really busy with school. But the longer he kept it up he could see the hurt in Kurts eyes when he turned down an offer to watch Bravo or have dinner or get coffee. Kurt didnt understand why Blaine was pulling away, and how could he?

Blaine felt awful, but this was all inevitable anyway. Eventually hed move out and go to school and Kurt and Cooper would be alone together. Blaine had already decided if Cooper and Kurt ended up in California he was going to New York and if Kurt and Cooper ended up in New York, hello California!

It hurt to not spend time with Kurt and to think about being so far away from him, but it hurt to be near him and know that he was Coopers and could never be his. So he kept up the distance.

Meanwhile show choir Sectionals came and went. The Warblers performed really well, Blaine was proud of them. He had even worked it to get Trent a short solo to help make up for the fact that his friend hadnt made it onto the council.

Kurt was there in the front row cheering when the Warblers won. He gave Blaine a big hug afterwards and if Blaine held onto him a bit longer than needed Kurt didnt mention it.

"Blaine you were amazing!" He said with a huge smile on his face. "And you won! Im so happy for you."

Blaine let himself enjoy Kurts closeness for that one afternoon. Cooper took all the Warblers and Kurt out for dinner and Kurt sat next to him and everything felt right. It was a good day, but then Blaine retreated back. Being with Kurt hurt like a stake to the heart and he knew if he could just stay away these inappropriate feeling he had would go away. They had too.

Blaine was miserable though, Kurt had become his best friend and the Warblers were somehow slowly morphing more and more into a dictatorship with Hunter at the helm. Blaine so wished he could talk to Kurt about it, but he had to be strong and not get in the way of Kurt and Coopers relationship.

Blaine got home from school one day after a particularly rough Warblers practice to find Kurt in the foyer his hands on his hips and a stern look on his face.

"Welcome home Blaine." He said.

"Um... hi? Am I in trouble?"

Kurt smiled a little and shook his head. "Come with me."

Blaine tried to think of an excuse not to, but since he didnt know what was going on he couldnt come up with anything. Plus he was just so tired. He followed Kurt into the kitchen and was met with the smell of fresh baked cookies. Sure enough there were plates of cookies all over the counter. Sugar cookies, chocolate chip, cinnamon, M&M.

"Whats all this?"

Kurt looked at all of the cookies a little sheepishly. "Sometimes when Im stressed or upset I go overboard with the baking. But I thought, Hey Blaine has seemed stressed recently too, I bet hed like some!" Kurt smiled and looked so hopeful that maybe Blaine wouldnt shut him down this time that Blaine wanted to cry.

"Yeah, I... Id like a couple."

Kurt bounced on his toes and grabbed two glasses from the cupboard, he got milk from the refrigerator and poured them both some and brought it over to where Blaine had settled down on a bar stool.

Blaine was already munching on a chocolate chip cookie when Kurt sat down across from him.

"What are you upset about?" Blaine asked searching Kurts face.

Kurt sighed. "Cooper and I are trying to figure out our living arrangements for when the first year is over. The only thing we can agree on is that we dont want to stay in Ohio."

"Is he considering New York?" This conversation was making Blaines heart ache, but it was obvious Kurt needed someone to talk to.

"He said he was, has he not mentioned it to you?"

No, Cooper hadnt mentioned it to Blaine; he still talked like he was moving to California in 8 months. But Blaine didnt want to say that, he didnt want to get between Kurt and Cooper.

"I... I dont know what Coopers thinking." Blaine said evasively. "Would you move to California?"

Kurt dunked a cookie in his milk and looked down sadly. "I dont know. I mean if we cant come up with a solution then the Lifemate Registry will chose for us. I can see them picking California over New York since Cooper is working there. I feel so selfish but I… I just hate giving up the idea of NYADA and New York."

Blaine nodded. "I could talk to him if you wanted, about New York?"

Kurt smiled genuinely at him and Blaines heart beat faster.

"No, thats okay. I know youre already standing up for me with him, you shouldnt have to be in the middle." Kurt took a bite of his cookie and seemed to be watching Blaine closely. "Hows school and the Warblers?"

Blaine wanted to say that things with the Warblers werent going well, that they fought almost every practice, that Hunter seemed a little ruthless and didnt care about the group as much as he cared about winning. But he didnt.

"Fine." Blaine nodded and stood up from the stool, wiping his hands off on a paper towel. "Its fine. Um… I should go work on some homework. Thanks for the cookies." He turned to leave but then stopped when Kurt called out behind him.

"What did I do?" He voice shook and sounded close to tears. "Im sorry if I did something wrong, but I dont… I dont understand what is happening with us here."

"There is no us." Blaine said hoarsely not turning around.

There was a moment of silence in which Blaine immediately regretted his harsh words.

"I thought we were friends." Kurt said so quietly Blaine almost did hear him. God, Blaine was such an idiot, what was he doing?

He turned around to see Kurts red eyes and face blotchy as he wiped his cheeks.

"We are friends Kurt. We are… I just… Im dealing with some stuff right now."

"I could help maybe, if youd let me in."

Blaine smiled ruefully. "Kurt, Im sorry. Im not trying to be mean, I just… I cant right now, okay?"

Kurt nodded, but Blaine could tell he didnt understand and how could he? From Kurts point of view it must just seem like his friend dropped him with no explanation and at a time when Kurt's whole life was shifting. Blaine winched at the thought. He was being selfish, just because he couldnt control his own feelings he was hurting the last person in the world he wanted to hurt.

Blaine turned away again with a sick feeling in his stomach and made it as far as the staircase before he spun around and ran back to the kitchen. Kurt was sitting on a bar stool looking misplaced and heartbroken.

"Im a jerk" Blaine said and Kurt looked up at him in surprise. "We are friends. Kurt youre my best friend and Im sorry Ive been so… weird the past few weeks. I miss you."

A smile tugged on Kurt's lips, but he still looked a little unsure. "Youre my best friend too."

Blaine was about to say more when his phone buzzed with a text from Sebastian.

Want to catch dinner and a show hot stuff?

Blaine sighed.

"Is it from Sebastian?" Kurt asked his hopeful expression falling.

"Yeah. He wants to go out."

Kurt nodded again his whole demeanor changing. His back straightened and his shoulders squared and he set his jaw. "Well you should go."

"Actually, I just saw him. Why dont we have an evening in,  the two of us? Dinner, maybe watch a movie? Put a dent in these cookies." He said gesturing to the plates on the counter.

"Really?" Kurt leaned forward his eyes sparkling.

Blaines heart twisted, but it didnt matter if spending time with Kurt hurt him, because the truth was he loved Kurt and hed do anything he could to make him happy. "Absolutely."

A huge grin spread across Kurts face before he bounced up from the chair and gave Blaine a hug. "Good." He said as he held Blaine tight.

Blaine hugged him back breathing him in. Kurt seemed to pull away from the hug slowly, but that was probably Blaines imagination. When Kurt backed up he was grinning ear to ear in the way that made his eyes crinkle up, his hand was on Blaines arm and it traveled down until their fingers were tangled together. Blaine looked down at their clasped hands and had to hold his breath. He glanced back up to Kurts face, his cheeks were a little pink and his eyes dancing, but then he let go of Blaines hand and took a step back.

"Can we order dinner? I dont feel like more cooking."

Blaine nodded. "Of course. This will be fun."

Blaine had been so stupid trying to cut Kurt out of his life, maybe he couldnt have what his heart really wanted with Kurt, but he would treasure what he could have.