Aug. 12, 2013, 12:34 p.m.
Healing Hearts: Promises for the brokenhearted
E - Words: 4,190 - Last Updated: Aug 12, 2013 Story: Closed - Chapters: 35/? - Created: Sep 12, 2011 - Updated: Aug 12, 2013 1,323 0 1 0 0
It took Blaine three attempts to lift Kurt's suitcase into the trunk of his car.
"Um… Kurt; are you positive Rachel didn't sneak her way into your luggage? Because this is really heavy!"
"Not very likely, not even a mouse could fit in there next to my stuff…" Kurt said, flinging his overnight bag next to the suitcase.
"Okay, you are aware we'll only be gone till Saturday, right?" Blaine asked.
"Yes, and lesson number one when travelling; it doesn't matter if you're away from home for one night or ten, you basically need to take the same amount of crap with you. It's one of those laws of physics they never tell you about in school!" Kurt grinned. "Believe me; I went over it several times when I was packing!"
Blaine went to sit down behind the wheel, while Kurt took the passenger's seat.
They'd agreed it would be easier if Kurt spent the night at Blaine's apartment, since they would be leaving for the airport very early the next morning. Blaine had come to pick up Kurt after his late shift at the hospital.
"So Blaine, you still haven't told me how much I owe you for the flight and the hotel?"
"And I won't be telling you either. I invited you to come along; so you don't have to worry about that." Blaine answered, starting the car and pulling out of the hospital parking lot.
"But I can't accept that! It's all so expensive! I mean, I looked it up, even the cheapest hotels in New York are overpriced!"
Blaine smirked. "Don't worry about all that stuff, baby… It's only a short flight, and it's pretty much covered by frequent flyer miles anyway."
Kurt nodded dumbly. Oh my. This man was used to flying around the country and across the ocean, while Kurt had never even crossed the state border, apart from visiting his aunt, who lived in Michigan.
"And… what hotel are we staying in?" he asked.
Blaine shook his head. "We won't be staying in a hotel."
"Huh?"
Where else could they be staying? A bed and breakfast? A youth hostel? A tent in Central Park?
"I still haven't come around to putting my apartment in Manhattan up for sale. So I called my old housekeeper and asked her to set it up for us. It should be clean and the fridge and pantry should be stocked for the week." Blaine turned his head towards Kurt. "I hope you don't mind? I thought it would be more comfortable than staying at some hotel. Besides, it has an amazing view over Central Park. You'll love it!"
Kurt was speechless.
"Kurt… Kurt?" Blaine waved a hand in front of his boyfriend's eyes "Are you still there?"
"Yes! Yes, I'm sorry… Wow, an apartment next to Central Park?"
"Yeah, on the corner of 72nd and Fifth."
"Fifth? Wait- as in Fifth Avenue? You own an apartment on FIFTH AVENUE? Huh…That's crazy!" Kurt exclaimed, trying to keep his cool and failing miserably.
"Like I said… you'll love it!" Blaine smiled.
"Oh my God, this place is huge!" Kurt gasped, as they entered Blaine's apartment, on the outskirts of Lima.
"It's too big actually, much like the one in New York…" Blaine said, "I don't really like it, but well..."
"But look at the size of this living room, it's- Fuck! Is that a grand piano over there?" Kurt made a beeline for the instrument.
"Yes, it's one of the few things I had brought over from New York. I like to play sometimes. It helps me unwind after work. The apartment is very soundproof, so the people below don't even notice when I do."
"Amazing..." Kurt breathed, running his fingers over the black shiny wood.
"Do you play?" Blaine asked, sauntering towards Kurt.
Kurt nodded. "My mom taught me. We used to play together every night. It was part of my bedtime ritual..." He said, still mesmerized by the magnificent instrument.
Blaine stood behind Kurt and pressed a kiss onto his shoulder. "You can play... if you want to..." He nipped at Kurt's neck, making Kurt shiver slightly.
"I don't know, it's been a while..." He said softly.
Blaine hugged Kurt from behind.
"Have you had dinner yet? I can make you something. No strike that, I can't. But I can warm you something up. Nothing fancy though..." He said.
Kurt shook his head and leaned back against Blaine. "No, it's alright; I've had a sandwich from the cafeteria this evening."
"Good... Hey, I'm going to put your overnight bag in the bedroom and change into something else. You need to take a shower or something, before we go to sleep?" Blaine asked.
"I've already showered at the hospital, thanks." Kurt smiled.
"Okay," Blaine pressed one last kiss on Kurt's cheek and walked out of the living room.
Kurt looked around the spacious room. It was nicely decorated, but there was a rather cold atmosphere to it. Kurt could see why Blaine didn't like it. It felt like there was something missing.
The only piece of furniture that radiated warmth was a large dresser against the opposite wall of the room. The entire surface was covered with picture frames and objects, arranged in a haphazard way.
He walked over to the dresser, and studied the pictures. They were all of Lily, at various ages. Some of them were of Blaine and her together. Blaine's eyes really sparkled on those pictures. The love for his daughter was written all over his face. The most precious photo was the one where Blaine was cradling a newborn Lily.
Kurt's breath caught when he noticed another frame, partially hidden behind the others. It was a small baby in an incubator, attached to lots of wires and tubes. The nametag on the incubator was visible… it said Daisy Anderson. She looked so perfect; you could never tell this baby had been dying. It was heartbreaking.
Kurt turned away and walked back over to the piano. After a moment's hesitation, he sat down on the bench. It could fit two people. Maybe he and Blaine could play a quatre-mains someday.
He carefully lifted the lid and brushed the keys lightly. Sighing deeply, he placed his hands on the keys, closed his eyes, and started playing.
He hadn't played the haunting melody in so many years; and still it came out flawless. Almost like his hands had a memory of their own.
In his mind, his mother was sitting next to him, listening to him playing, as she had done so many times when he was little.
He felt her warmth against his side, as the soft music notes swirled around them, some slowly, some fast, as if they were caught in a magical whirlwind.
He wanted this moment to last forever.
But it didn't.
As the final note died down, he felt the gentle and loving touch of a hand on his shoulder. A smile tugged at his lips, and he opened his eyes to look at Blaine, who was sitting next to him.
"So beautiful..." Blaine whispered, running his fingers over Kurt's cheek.
Kurt wasn't sure if he was talking about the music or about him.
"My mom taught me that piece... I don't even know who composed it. It was just... ours."
Blaine smiled. "It's breathtaking... you play it so well..." he said, pressing a kiss to Kurt's cheek.
Kurt smiled at Blaine, and tilted his head. "Play something for me too?"
Blaine thought for a minute.
"Okay... but only if I can sing too." he finally answered with a small grin.
Kurt nodded, scooted to the side and straddled the bench, so Blaine could sit in the middle.
Blaine struck a few chords and then began to play... and sing.
Won't you see me through
no don't hurt me
no don't hurt me
see me through
when the lights go down on the broken hearted
I wanna be with you
'cause being with you
is the same
as never growing older
see me through
no don't hurt me
no don't hurt me
see me through
when the lights go down on the broken hearted
I wanna be with you
'cause being with you
is the same
as never growing older
morning breaks as you awake
with colours loud and you sing it out
there's no doubt you bring it out
Won't you see me through
if it takes all night I will feed the fire
see me through
when the lights go down on the broken hearted
And I wanna be with you
'cause being with you is the same
as never growing older
morning breaks as you awake
with colours loud and you sing it out
Well, there's no doubt you bring it out, love
Blaine turned his head and gazed into Kurt's eyes as he continued singing the next lines.
Won't you bring it out, love
Won't you bring it out, love
Won't you bring it out, love
Won't you bring it out, love
Kurt was captivated by the words as well as Blaine's voice. They both conveyed the same emotions.
And the morning breaks as you awake
with colours loud and you sing it out
Oh but, there's no doubt you bring it out, love
Won't you see me through
If it takes all night I will feed the fire
See me through
When the lights go down on the broken hearted
And I wanna be with you
'cause being with you is the same
as never growing older
Blaine lifted his hands from the piano keys, and laid them in his lap. He was staring at the piano, emotions written all over his face.
Still straddling the bench, Kurt shuffled closer to Blaine, till their bodies were touching. He grabbed one of Blaine's hands in his, and brought them to his lips, pressing soft kisses to it. Blaine raised his eyes and stared at Kurt's mouth.
"Your hands... they move so elegantly over the piano keys..." Kurt said, "I love them... I love your voice..."
Kurt and Blaine were now staring into each others eyes.
"I love... I love you." Kurt breathed. A lone tear trailed down his cheek.
Blaine's breath hitched. His hands flew to Kurt's face, and he pressed their foreheads together. "I love you too, baby... so, so much... I know it sounds crazy, but I'd do anything for you... anything to see you happy... I just... I love you-"
His speech was cut short by Kurt, who crashed his mouth against Blaine's.
They moved over the bench in perfect harmony, with Kurt ending up straddling Blaine's lap.
It wasn't long before the intense kissing turned into raw mouthfucking.
It soon became too much for Kurt. Something had to happen... now.
"Blaine..." he broke the kiss, "I love you so much... please... I want to make love to you..." he gasped, burying his face into Blaine's neck, and starting to suck on the sensitive skin.
Blaine tipped his head backwards and moaned. "Kurt... Gods..." He pulled back and cupped the other man's face with his hands again.
"Kurt... we can't... oh God, I want to make love to you too. So much. But I want to do this the right way. Not just some quick fuck..." Kurt gasped at those words, "We need to take our time... and as much I hate to say it, we really, really haven't got that right now. We need to get up in five hours time, and we have a really busy day tomorrow... but tomorrow night, I promise... we can do everything you want... everything we want," he kissed Kurt again.
Kurt sat back and groaned in frustration. "I can't believe we're being cockblocked by a fucking plane!"
Blaine chuckled. "I know honey, I know... but I had to book this flight at such short notice, I couldn't get one at a less ungodly hour."
"Fine..." Kurt huffed.
He bit his lip for a few seconds, and then, in one fluent movement, he slid from Blaine's lap onto the floor, pushed Blaine's legs apart and kneeled down between them.
"What are you doing?" Blaine gasped.
Kurt looked up with a devious glint in his eyes. "We might not make love tonight, but I'm not going to bed without getting you off." He pulled on the drawstrings of Blaine's sweatpants.
Blaine grasped Kurt's hands to stop him. "Kurt, baby, there's really no need-"
"Oh hush... I want this... I want you. Please, let me do this... I promise I'll be quick..." Kurt chuckled softly.
Blaine's eyes darkened with lust. He dropped his hands to his side.
"Do it..." He growled.
Kurt smirked and wasted no time tugging down Blaine's sweatpants and boxers, and freeing his erection. He bent forward and gave a little teasing lick around the head, before taking him completely in his mouth.
Blaine moaned loudly as he let himself fall back against the piano. The noise the piano keys made faintly registered in his mind, and he reached sideways to flip the lid closed. All he could do was moan and gasp, as Kurt continued to lick and suck him in earnest.
If he kept it up at that pace, it would indeed be over very quickly.
Blaine ran his hands over Kurt's hair. "God, baby, that feels so good..." he whispered hoarsely.
Kurt hummed in answer.
"Oh God..." Blaine bucked in pleasure, "Please... do that again..." Kurt smiled around Blaine's cock and did as he was asked.
Blaine dropped his head to look at Kurt.
It was quite a sight; this beautiful but debauched looking, fallen angel, sitting on his knees, doing all these amazing, wicked things to him. It was without a doubt the most erotic sight he'd ever witnessed.
Pretty soon, the pleasure started to overtake all of his senses. He was close.
"Baby, I'm going to come..." he gasped.
Kurt raised his eyes to Blaine's, smirked and winked. It was enough to make Blaine explode into Kurt's mouth. "Fuck!" he cried out and arched his back, coming hard with a few jerky thrusts.
With Blaine still coming down from his high, Kurt pressed a kiss on his softening cock and tucked him back into his pants. He slowly ran his hands over Blaine's thighs, and looked up at him, catching his eyes. "Did you like that?" He asked with a low voice.
Blaine grabbed Kurt's wrists and pulled the man into a fierce kiss, thrusting his tongue past Kurt's lips and trying to catch a taste of himself.
Kurt moaned loudly into the kiss. After a few moments, he pulled back and said breathlessly "Well... I'll take that as yes..."
"Get up..." Blaine snarled his eyes still clouded with desire. He pulled Kurt up by the wrists until the man was standing in front of him, his bulging crotch hovering before Blaine's eyes.
Blaine leaned in and pressed a hot, open-mouthed kiss on Kurt's jeans-clad erection, nipping and massaging the bulge with his lips.
"Blaine... please..." Kurt whimpered.
Blaine let go, grabbed Kurt's hips, and guided him around the bench, putting him with his back against the piano. Blaine himself went to sit in the same position as before, when he had played the song. But now he would be looking to fill the air with more heavenly sounds. The sound of his fallen angel.
"You are so beautiful..." Blaine said, as he loosened Kurt's belt buckle, and unzipped his jeans.
That action alone was enough to make Kurt breathless. It had been so long since somebody had done this to him. He cried out as Blaine yanked his pants and underwear down in one, rough movement.
"Beautiful..." Blaine repeated, at the sight of Kurt's erection.
And then everything around Kurt blurred into oblivion, and the only thing that remained was the feeling of Blaine's soft lips and his warm, moist mouth wrapped around him. He threw his head back and mewled.
"Blaine..."
Blaine smiled around Kurt's cock. These were the sounds he was looking for. He wanted to make his angel sing out in ecstasy.
And he did.
Kurt whimpered and cried out several times. It was music to Blaine's ears. No more than a few minutes later, a high pitched shout escaped Kurt's throat, as he came.
Kurt's knees buckled and he fell down onto Blaine's lap, straddling him and devouring his mouth.
"That was... fucking... amazing," he breathed, stroking Blaine's cheek with his fingers.
"It was..." Blaine said huskily, looking lovingly into Kurt's bright eyes. "You are amazing, baby... I love you."
"I love you too." Kurt answered, smiling. "Now... let's go to sleep... I think we're both tired enough, don't you?"
Blaine nodded. "Um... I have the guest room prepared, if you want to- I mean, I didn't want to assume-"
Kurt hushed Blaine with a peck on the lips. "I'm sleeping in your bed tonight... and you can be the little spoon."
Blaine grinned. "Story of my life… Deal!"
They were in bed again.
They weren't naked this time.
Sam was sitting up, resting against the headboard, several pillows propped up behind his back. It was the only way he could sleep anymore, even with the help of the oxygen cannula up his nose. The cancer was filling his lungs at a frightening speed.
Kurt lay down on the bed, his head resting on Sam's lap, and his arm sprawled over Sam's thighs. This way, they could still sleep while holding on to each other. Sam's illness had prompted them to be creative on a lot of levels.
Kurt was listening to his boyfriend's laboured breathing. It sounded really painful at times.
They both knew this was their last night together like this. They had agreed to go back to the hospital in the morning. Sam's condition had deteriorated so much during the last days, that staying at home wasn't an option anymore.
They realized that Sam wouldn't be returning home this time. It was all going to end soon. Very soon. It still came as a shock to Kurt, even if he had known for over a year that this day would come. He heaved a tired sigh, and almost instantly felt a hand stroking his hair.
"Can't sleep…?" Sam asked breathlessly.
"No…" Kurt whispered.
"Me neither…"
Kurt planted a kiss on Sam's thigh. "Is there anything I can do?"
"Sit up, sexy…"
Kurt smiled. Sam liked to call him 'sexy' when nobody else was around. The nickname had gotten a sweet, endearing undertone over the years. He sat up and scooted to sit as close to Sam as possible.
"Will you sing something… for me? I want to hear your voice..." Sam asked.
Kurt nodded, and started singing softly, in his pure, soft, fragile voice.
I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done
And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
Louder louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say
To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbye
I nearly do
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
Louder louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say
Slower slower
We don't have time for that
All I want's to find an easy way
To get out of our little heads
Kurt brushed Sam's cheek with his hand. Sam closed his eyes and leaned into the touch, listening to the rest of the song.
Have heart, my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
Sam grasped Kurt's hand and pressed a kiss to it. "Kurt… baby… thank you so much… for everything. If it hadn't been for you... I've couldn't have stayed at home this long…"
Kurt gulped. He didn't want this. Sam was starting to say goodbye. He couldn't do that; not yet. "Sam, you don't have to-"
"Kurt... please let me speak... soon I won't be able to anymore…" Sam was breathing heavily as he spoke. He looked exhausted.
Kurt nodded for him to continue, tears already forming in his eyes. "Kurt… if it hadn't been for your love… I wouldn't have lived this long… we know this is borrowed time… You know I love you…"
Kurt was crying now. "I love you too, Sam…"
Sam smiled, wiping away Kurt's tears with his thumb. "I know… I'm so sorry I have to leave you, baby… all I ever wanted was for you to be happy… it breaks my heart to know that I'm causing these tears…"
Kurt shook his head. "Don't be sorry… you've been so brave, you fought so hard. You have fought for me and taken care of me for six years, ever since that day in the locker room. I'm so lucky to have had you in my life. I just wish… you could stay with me…"
Sam's smile faded slightly. "I'll always be here, Kurt," he pressed their intertwined hands over Kurt's heart. "I'll never leave… Kurt... promise me you will go on… I want you to finish your studies… create your fashion… go to New York… you belong there…"
"Okay…" Kurt whispered through his tears "I promise." It was a lie, and Kurt knew it.
"And Kurt… promise me… you will love again… don't shut it out… look at you… you're such a beautiful, precious… sweet and loving man… anyone would be lucky to have you… I've been the luckiest man in the world… because I got to spend the rest of my life with you... I want you to have that too… somebody to love you and hold you forever… even if it's not me… so promise me… please…"
"I promise…"
Another lie.
Two new promises made, a third, old one broken. The one of always being honest with each other, no matter what. But Kurt wanted Sam to have some kind of closure, so he could spend his last days in peace of mind. The burden was to be his, not Sam's. It was the right thing to do.
Sam started coughing violently.
"Sam!"
Kurt startled awake. He hadn't had that dream in quite a while. The memories of that night were still so vivid, even after all that time.
Sighing, he turned on his side, and bumped into a solid form. It took him a few seconds to realize where he was.
Blaine's apartment.
Blaine's bedroom.
Blaine's bed.
Blaine. Not Sam.
At least one promise to Sam had been kept.
He was in love with another man.
He loved Blaine Anderson.
Monday morning – 6:30 AM
Dayton International Airport
Kurt and Blaine had passed the check-in and security check without much fuss, and were now sitting in the lobby, drinking a coffee, while waiting for the boarding of the flight to La Guardia Airport to begin.
"I can't believe you got us first class tickets. I didn't even know they had first class on short distance flights!" Kurt rambled in excitement.
"They do…" Blaine yawned. "God, I'm still tired."
"Well, drink your coffee then, it's gonna wake you up! You know, you can't go jetlag on me when we get to New York, we're not even changing time zones, and I want to go sightseeing!"
Blaine chuckled. Kurt's giddiness was cute. "Don't worry, I'll have a quick nap on the plane and when we land in New York, I'm all yours. I'll be your tour guide for today. And, who knows, if you tip me nicely; I might provide some extra services tonight…" He grinned, waggling his eyebrows.
"I see you're waking up, you're already making lewd suggestions." Kurt remarked dryly.
Blaine laughed and took a sip of his coffee. He caught Kurt staring at the plane that was visible through the glass walls.
"First flight?"
Kurt nodded.
"Nervous?"
Kurt nodded again, eyes still fixated on the plane.
"There's no need. The take off is like riding a rollercoaster in a theme park – I actually think it's kinda fun – and once you're up in the air it's like you're sitting in a train. A really fancy train."
Kurt shook his head. "I've never been in a train either."
"Ah… well, never mind, you'll be okay, and I'm right beside you." Blaine squeezed his hand.
"Holy fuck, that was intense… they call that a take off? It felt like a rocket being launched into outer space!" Kurt's stomach was still settling down. He looked out of the window and saw the world below them becoming smaller and smaller.
"I know, I said it was fun…" Blaine said.
Kurt turned his head toward him slowly, looking incredulous. Blaine guffawed at his expression.
"Anyway, I'm taking that nap now, if you don't mind, I don't want to risk losing my client to another tour guide, he's kinda hot actually." Blaine teased, pushing a button to recline the chair, and throwing the complimentary blanket over his torso.
Kurt decided to do the same. It was going to be a long day.
And it looked like he might be needing some extra strength for tonight as well.
The sounds of the plane permeated his foggy, sleep-addled brain, together with the feeling of a pair of warm lips pressed against his.
"Wake up, sleeping beauty…" A warm voice whispered.
Kurt opened his eyes and stared into a pair of hazel ones. "Oh… are we there yet?" He asked with a tired smile.
Blaine smiled and pointed at the window. "Look outside."
Kurt leaned toward the window and peered down. He let out a loud gasp. "Oh my God… that's amazing!"
He was looking at Manhattan. And the view was absolutely breathtaking. He could see everything. The Empire State Building, Central Park, the UN…
"Look," Blaine pointed to the left, "there's Lady Liberty!"
Kurt took it all in. "It's really incredible."
Blaine nodded. "Isn't it? But you ain't seen nothing yet baby! Just wait till we set foot on Manhattan soil!"
Kurt couldn't suppress a little squeal. This was it. He was finally in New York!
Comments
Every time something Sa$ related appears it breaks my heart. I almost wish he hadn't died at all and that this was a Kum story :'(