For the remainder of the week, Kurt and Blaine barely saw each other, and they definitely didnt speak. They didn't text. They didn't even acknowledge one another if they happened to find themselves in the same room together. Kurt left the loft earlier than necessary every morning to seek refuge at his favorite coffee house, drowning his sorrows in various flavors of chai tea since nonfat mochas had suddenly developed the power to bring him to tears.

They didn't make eye contact when they passed each other in the halls at school between classes, but Blaine would often turn and watch Kurt walk away when he knew that Kurt wouldn't catch him.

Blaine couldn't help it.

He missed him.

Blaine spent his nights with DeLeon since the man's days in New York were numbered. Soon he would be packing up and boarding a flight to London. After that, Blaine had no idea what would happen back at the loft.

Would Kurt continue to ignore him? Leave early every day and look past him in the hallways?

Could Blaine live like that, with Kurt acting like he didn't exist?

Blaine contemplated moving out since he didnt want to make Kurt uncomfortable. He didnt want Kurt to feel like he had to go to extraordinary lengths to avoid him. The loft had been Kurt's home long before Blaine moved to New York, but Blaine could easily imagine Kurt hiding in the costume shop at NYADA at night, or the vault at Vogue so he wouldnt have to come home to a place where Blaine lived.

Blaine didn't want that. If their friendship was over, and he prayed it wasn't over, he didn't want chasing Kurt out of his home to be the last impression Kurt had of him.

On DeLeons last night in New York, Blaine made an attempt to chip away at Kurts carefully constructed armor by inviting him along to their Bon Voyage night out on the town.

Blaine and DeLeon had come up with the idea to invite Kurt together, but Blaine made it a point not to mention that part.

"Come on, Kurt," Blaine begged, checking his watch for the twentieth time in five minutes, a gesture that did not go unnoticed by Kurt, who shielded himself behind his issue of Vogue. "Its going to be a blast! And you need to get out. You havent gone out a single night this week, have you?"

"How would you know?" Kurt grumbled, pretending to read an article on the resurgence of dyed faux fur accents. "You arent here at night anymore. I could be whoring myself out in your bedroom and you wouldnt have a clue."

"Kurt, I think Id notice that," Blaine chuckled, hoping that comment was Kurts attempt at diffusing a tense situation through humor. This was the first time they'd spoken to one another all week. Frankly, Blaine was ecstatic that Kurt didn't immediately vault off the couch and race into his bedroom the second Blaine walked through the loft door. He took it as a good sign. But when Kurt didnt even crack a smile, Blaine realized that Kurt was still upset, more so than Blaine had anticipated.

This week they'd spent apart had done little to cool Kurt's temper.

Kurt turned the page he had been glaring murderously at, even though he'd only read the headline and photo captions.

"But, seriously," Blaine continued, "I think youd have a great time."

Kurt scoffed and turned another unread page, counting the minutes until Blaine left so he could get a start on his pity party.

"Do you think I want to watch you and your stewardess friend pawing all over each other while I sit in a corner and chug Shirley Temples? If I want to watch porn, I can stream it off the Internet. Ive been considering getting a Cockyboys membership, anyway."

Blaine sighed. Kurt and porn werent two words that one often uttered in the same sentence. The thought of Kurt sitting on the couch, miserable and alone, with a cheesecake in his lap, watching two guys going at it through the spaces between his fingers the way a little kid watches a slasher film, grabbed a hold of Blaine's heart and twisted.

Once again, Blaine considered canceling and staying home. He wouldn't tell Kurt this time since Kurt would probably just tell him to go. Yes, DeLeon was leaving for London in the morning, but Blaine had spent quite a bit of time with him this week. He was sure DeLeon would understand.

Even if he didnt, would it matter? DeLeon was leaving, and who knew when he would be back.

A loud knock ended the non-conversation.

The door slid open and DeLeon stepped in. "Hey guys!"

“Hey!” Blaine turned and waved cheerfully to the man headed his way, but a second later, his eyes darted back to Kurt. In the small space of time that Blaine had turned his attention away, Kurt had huddled as close to the arm of the couch as possible, with the edges of the throw wrapped around his shoulders clutched tight in his fist. He hunched down, burying himself deeper into an interview with Rihanna.

DeLeon sashayed up to Blaine. He laced a hand with Blaine's and kissed him on the corner of his mouth. Kurt groaned quietly, his nose practically sinking into the seam of his magazine.

"Sorry for the intrusion," DeLeon said in the rhythm of a Beyonce song he'd been humming. Kurt frowned. He didn't expect the man to have such a melodious tenor voice. But why not? The man was built, handsome, and could apparently carry a tune. And now he was dating Blaine. The man had everything. "But Blaine said you guys usually keep the door unlocked and that I could come right in. How you get away with that out here in Brooklyn, Ill never understand."

“It helps that we don't own anything worth stealing,” Blaine joked.

“Oh, I don't know.” DeLeon raised a hand to run a finger down Blaine's cheek. “I'd break in here just to snatch up the two of you.”

Blaine kissed DeLeon's hand when it came close to his mouth.

Kurt smiled begrudgingly, but didnt lift his eyes from his magazine.

DeLeon bent over to catch Kurts gaze. When he realized he wouldnt, he stood back up. Never one to be deterred, he smiled, preparing to try again.

"You know, for a fashion maven such as yourself, this look is a little low-key for the night we had in mind, Kurt."

Kurt harrumphed. DeLeon smile wider.

"He said no," Blaine answered for him, gazing plaintively at the rug beneath his feet. DeLeon looked from the disappointed man by his side to the stubborn one sitting on the couch, staring at an ad for Dior, and decided to try, and succeed, where Blaine had failed.

"Well, too bad." DeLeon grabbed Kurt by the arm and dragged him to his feet. "It wasnt a request. So put on the sexiest thing you have, darling, because we are partying hardy with six of the hottest men who ever played for our team. And get a move on. Youve got five minutes."

Kurt glared, mortified, at the man with tremendous biceps who practically lifted him into the air, but then he caught sight of Blaine staring at his shoes with a hopeful smile on his lips.

Kurt could never refuse that smile. It was Kurt's kryptonite. But he wasnt going to pretend to be happy about it.

"Fine. But five minutes only gets you mildly sexy. If you want truly devastating, Ill need fifteen."

"Take your time then. I'm willing to wait for devastating. I've heard it's something to see." DeLeon swatted Kurt on the backside. Kurt spun, shooting daggers at both of them when they dissolved into giggles, turning in toward one another like conspiratorial teenagers. He stared at them a little longer than he should have, which is why he saw DeLeon lean in to kiss Blaine's neck … and Blaine close his eyes to enjoy it.

And somewhere in his heart, that he had let grow hard against any amount of Blaines lingering love for him, a single sliver fractured off.

***

They took three subways into Manhattan to a nightclub Kurt had never heard of before, but that DeLeon insisted was the hangout for flight attendants when they hit the city.

“It has an awesome vibe,” he said, leading Kurt from the subway car with their arms linked together (the other looped inside Blaines, walking three across with DeLeon in the center like they were performing in an all-male remake of The Wizard of Oz, skipping down the Yellow Brick Road), “the hottest dancers, the tastiest specialty drinks, and the music! Man, it is always bumping! Am I right, Blainey?”

Kurt turned his head to look past DeLeon at Blaine. Blainey?

“Yeah,” Blaine agreed, looking at Kurt. “This place is seriously fantastic, and the music is on hit! You're gonna love it!”

Kurt watched DeLeon bend to Blaine's ear and whisper something that made him nod and titter. “Oh my God!” Blaine said. “I totally forgot! That was the best!”

So, Blainey agreed it was hot. Which meant hed already been there.

They hadn't even left the subway and Kurt hated it immediately.

They could hear the music pounding all the way from the subway turn-stall. Once they got up top and crossed the street, Kurt saw that the line to get in wrapped completely around the building. But DeLeon blew by the line and managed to get them through the ropes, kissing the cheeks of the bouncers at the entrance. The trio had barely taken a step through the doors when they were mobbed by six extremely handsome, astonishingly well-built men, with freakishly perfect teeth and flawless skin.

That must be the package deal for flight attendants, Kurt thought. The minute you sign on, they cap your teeth and perform some ritual that magically fixes your skin. But even as he privately jeered, he made a note to ask one of these guys what exfoliator and moisturizers they used because damn!

“Kurt” - DeLeon put his hands on Kurt's shoulders in a familiar way that irritated Kurt to no end - “this is Savon, Michael, Kevin, Trey, Dominick, and Stephen. Guys …” DeLeon pushed Kurt slightly forward, as if presenting him for the group's approval. “This is Kurt.”

“So, we finally get to meet the famous Kurt,” Kevin said, taking Kurt's hand in his and kissing it.

“Enchante,” Savon said, taking Kurt's other hand at kissing it as well.

"Oh … my … goodness,” Kurt murmured. “Why dont I fly more often?" He was sure no one could hear him over the pulsing music, but DeLeon did.

“I'll find a way to comp you some tickets so you can join our Mile High Club,” he whispered. “Have at him, boys!” He shoved Kurt headlong into the throng of men and let them lead the way out on to the dance floor.

Twelve songs into the evening, Kurts shirt clung to his torso, almost entirely see-thru with sweat, which Kurt normally hated, but he was loosening up. He felt more carefree than he had all week. These six guys, who seemed entirely focused on him and him alone, were so sweet, so nice, so complimentary, that he could almost let go and pretend that this was a normal night out, that he was free of his feelings for Blaine, but his enjoyment dimmed every time he caught a glimpse of Blaine and DeLeon grinding together, their hands all over each other, smiling, talking, sharing little pecks, lost in their own little world.

Kurt remembered that world.

And even surrounded by six men who could classify as super models, apparently willing to cater to his every whim, he missed that world.

He missed Blaine.

Another song started, a slower song. He saw Blaine and DeLeon wrap their arms around each other. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't not watch. He had to put some distance between him and them before he went crazy.

"I think Im going to sit this one out, boys," Kurt announced. “Don't miss me too much.” He walked briskly away to a chorus of disappointed groans and pleas to come back soon. He headed through the crowd toward a ring of tables, trying not to break into a gallop in his need to be away from Blaine and DeLeon.

But the universe rarely ever worked in Kurts favor.

No sooner did he claim a vacant booth than DeLeon slid in beside him, lips curled in a devilish grin.

"Leaving the dance floor so soon?" he purred. "The partys just getting started."

"Yeah, well, I think I overdid it a bit," Kurt lied, gaze rising from DeLeons eyes to lock with Blaines as he joined them, his eyes wide and full of concern. “That dance floor's a little too hot with me on it.”

"Why dont I get us some drinks?" Blaine offered, resting a hand on DeLeons shoulder and squeezing gently. Kurts eyes followed that hand, felt the squeeze on his own skin, and he swallowed hard.

"Nothing for me, thanks," Kurt said, looking away. “I'm good.”

DeLeon put a hand over Blaines and patted gently. "Ill have a rum and coke.”

"Youve got it," Blaine said with a wink. He waited one more pause to see if Kurt would change his mind, then headed off to the bar.

DeLeon watched him go.

When he turned back to Kurt, the mischievous glint was still in his eyes, but the expression on his face was much more serious.

"When are you going to tell that man that you're still in love with him?" he asked, cutting to the chase.

Kurt sat straight up, jerking back in his seat. "Excuse me?" he said indignantly.

DeLeon rolled his eyes, far too done with this conversation already.

"I see you," DeLeon said, tapping his temple. "I see you watching us. If you think youre hiding anything, youre mistaken."

Kurt chuckled viciously. "Then maybe it's a good thing you're sitting down because I think the heat is getting to you. That, or you seriously need to have your vision checked."

DeLeon slid in closer. Kurt fought the urge to slide further away.

"You see, I want to like you," DeLeon said, "but when you say things like that, you make it really hard. Now usually Id tear you a new one for being such a bitch, especially when I went through the trouble to ensure that you would be thoroughly entertained tonight, but seeing as you probably wouldnt be in this situation if your boy Blaine hadnt cheated on you, Im gonna let it slide."

At the mention of his name, Kurts eyes subconsciously swept the club to find him. And he did find Blaine, with surprising swiftness, standing at the bar, waiting for their drinks.

"Even hearing Blaine's side of things, I'm gonna tell you, you weren't wrong,” DeLeon continued. “And I told him that … repeatedly. He should have driven past that hotel, gotten on a plane, and talked to you face to face before sticking his dick in someone else. You have every right not to take him back if that's what you really want. But I know that face. Fuck, Ive even worn that face. And that is most definitely love, son."

DeLeons expression softened, his eyes following Kurts where they rested on Blaines back. He could easily picture Kurt's face on the night Blaine told him he cheated. Blaine's story had broken DeLeon's heart, but Kurt's story, the one he hadn't even heard from the source, hurt worse. It was the one that DeLeon could relate to. He had hoped that he could get Kurt to open up to him, but Kurt stayed tight lipped, staring longingly at his ex.

So DeLeon decided to try a different tactic to get Kurt to spill.

"Or maybe Im wrong.” He shrugged. “Maybe those heart eyes of yours are staring at his sweet, sweet ass."

Kurts head snapped so quickly back to the man beside him, he was sure he'd pulled something in his neck.

"Yup, that boy has a fine behind," DeLeon remarked, watching Kurt react. As he suspected, Kurts shoulders tightened, his back went rigid, and his jaw clenched. "Too bad I didnt get the chance to see it."

Kurts hands balled reflexively, but his face morphed from disgust to confusion in the blink of an eye.

"Wait … b-but … hes been spending every night this week at your place. I thought you two were …"

"Well, the first night he came over I tried," DeLeon admitted. "Lord knows I tried. But he stopped me before I could do anything." DeLeon grimaced at the memory. "And I was so close, too."

"So, what did happen?" Kurt hated that he was curious, but he needed the truth to erase his heartbreaking fantasies of Blaine and this man making love to one another.

"He said he was sorry and asked if we could just be friends. Seeing as Im leaving for London and then God knows where after that for a few months, I agreed it was probably for the best."

Kurt felt relieved, which he knew he probably shouldn't. He was being unfair. He had no exclusive rights to Blaine anymore. And he had made that decision. But he was also confused. He shut his eyes, trying to put the pieces of this puzzle together, especially after what he had seen of their behavior with his own eyes. "So, what has he been doing at your place?"

DeLeon shook his head, as if the answer was blaringly obvious and Kurts denseness far from amusing. "Giving you space."

Kurt threw his hands up in frustration. "Why didn't he just tell me the truth?”

"No disrespect, man, but did you give him the chance? Or did you get upset and back him into a corner? Because I think both you and I know the answer to that."

Kurt wanted to be angry at Blaine for lying about sleeping with DeLeon, but then he thought about the last few days of avoiding Blaine like he was the plague or a Sears Department Store. His cheeks pinked with embarrassment, and then with a touch of anger. It was one thing for Kurt to recognize his own shortcomings, but another to have his exs current sort-of platonic fling shove it in his face.

Shortcomings that DeLeon would only know if Blaine was talking about him behind his back.

Kurt's eyes shot open wide. "Now wait …"

"Before you get all high-pitched on me, no, he didnt say anything," DeLeon said, his arms raised in defense. "I just happen to know a thing or two about flying off the handle. I can get kind of high-pitchy, too."

“So …”

“I guessed, and he might have confirmed … vaguely. That's all I'm sayin'. I don't need to get that boy into any more trouble.” DeLeon chuckled. “He obviously does that fine on his own.”

Kurt nodded, relaxing even though he wasnt sure how any of this would change things between him and Blaine. But Kurts shoulders squared again when another thought entered his mind.

"What about the grinding and the touching and the little kisses between the two of you?" Kurt asked, becoming high-pitchy anyway.

"So, I took a few liberties,” DeLeon said. “Can you blame me? Look at him. Hes gorgeous … but you already know that."

Out of the corner of his eye, Kurt watched Blaine walk toward their table, eyes trained solely on him as if he were the center of the known universe and a few others as well.

DeLeon saw it, too, and sighed. "Unfortunately for me, hes all yours, sunshine."

Blaine set the drinks down, sliding a glass of clear, bubbly liquid overflowing with cherries in front of Kurt.

"I know you said you didnt want anything," Blaine said, "but I thought, you look so hot … I mean flushed … and just in case you changed your mind …"

DeLeon took his rum and coke and sipped it, recognizing with regret just how quickly he had disappeared from Blaines notice. He wasn't angry at Blaine. Blaine talked about Kurt like he was the moon and the stars. Even if DeLeon had had a chance with Blaine and they had slept together, he'd only be borrowing him.

It would have been fun, but DeLeon wanted more. He deserved more.

He couldn't have that with Blaine.

"Look," he interrupted, backing out of the booth, "I dont mean to drink and run, but Ive got an early morning. I think Im going to bow out now."

Blaine watched him stand, his shame at ignoring the man of the hour apparent in the way his mouth stopped working.

"B-but, DeLeon," Blaine stuttered. "Don't go. Im sorry if I …"

DeLeon put a hand over Blaines lips and shushed him. “It's alright. I get it.” He smiled at Blaines apologetic eyes and leaned in close, kissing him gently on the lips. Kurts drink suddenly became very interesting and he glued his eyes to it, counting the cherries in an effort not to burn holes into DeLeons skull.

Why should Kurt be jealous of a little kiss if they weren't dating? Though the way his heart seized up at the idea of Blaine kissing DeLeon back pretty much answered that question for him.

DeLeon pulled away from Blaines lips, sparing a glance at Kurt, who was staring down his drink as if the cherries were marked for death.

"I think its time you fixed this once and for all, dont you?" DeLeon whispered. Blaine looked at Kurt, too, curled over his drink the same way he had been on the couch when he was crawling into his magazine. He had so many walls built up around him. Blaine did that. Those walls hadn't been there for years after Blaine helped knock the original ones down. These were new, and they'd been built to protect Kurt's heart from being broken … by Blaine.

With a final hug, DeLeon walked off into the crowd, disappearing from view.

"You know, come to think about it, I should probably call it a night, too." Kurt slid out of the booth from the opposite end so as not to disturb Blaine, who stared blankly into the crowd as if trying to summon DeLeon back. Kurt was confused how DeLeon could assume that Blaine only wanted Kurt when he seemed genuinely smitten for the sage man who had just gone. Kurt headed off in a different direction, but a hand grabbing his stopped him.

"Dont go," Blaine pleaded softly, his voice managing to rise above the noise even with Kurts back turned. Blaine pressed his body against Kurt's, not overbearing or aggressive, the simple warmth of his presence bleeding into Kurt's skin and simply making itself known.

"Blaine," Kurt started, not sure what he wanted to say, hoping the words would come to him as soon as he opened his mouth, and that he would actually mean them, whatever they were.

"Dance with me?" Blaine dared an arm around Kurts waist. "Please? Just … just once before you go?"

“You sure you haven't had enough dancing?” Kurt snapped. “I mean, it looked like you were getting your fill before.”

“It's not the same when I'm not with you.”

Kurt felt himself melting into Blaines arm, molding against his body, and it frightened him. It would be this simple, wouldnt it? To fall back together? But what would that mean?

Could it last this time?

He thought about it as he followed Blaine out onto the dance floor, as he let himself get wrapped up in Blaine's arms, swaying with him to music that didnt match their beat since the music over the speakers pounded through the floor like a rainstorm, and they glided along together like a wave. Between the beats and the laughter and the loud voices, Kurt could hear the occasional Im sorry …

I miss you so much …

You have no idea how much …

I love you …

I love you more now than I ever have …

Ill do anything …

Anything you want …

Ill even move out … give you more space …

Just please say we get to be boyfriends again …

Kurt heard every word, and he believed them. But before he made any decisions, there were a few things he needed to know. “I … have to ask you something.”

“Anything.”

“Why did you make me think you and DeLeon had slept together? Why didn't you tell me the truth?”

“Because …” Blaine looked guilty, maybe even more guilty than he had when he told Kurt he'd been with someone else “… when I came home, you were drunk … and you looked destroyed. I was confused, and I wanted to help, but I didn't know what to do to make it better. You'd been trying for so long to get me together with someone. I thought that if you thought I had been, then you could …”

“Could what?”

“Be free. Have closure so you could move on. It seemed to be what you wanted so much. I thought … I thought you were done with me and that, somehow, I was hurting you. I didn't want to hurt you anymore.”

“Well, unfortunately, I think we were both damned if we did and damned if we didn't.”

“Or, maybe we're just …”

“… made for each other?” Kurt finished. He was going to say stubborn, but for some reason that came out instead.

Blaine didn't agree or disagree, but Kurt knew that's how he felt. He didn't need to confirm it.

That's part of what it means when you belong with someone.

Blaine raised a hand to caress Kurt's cheek and nuzzled his neck.

“Please tell me you still love me,” Blaine whispered. “I know I hurt you, and I'm sorry, Kurt. I'm so so sorry. I don't think I'll ever stop being sorry. And if you want to remind me every day for the rest of my life, then that's fine, but let me spend that life with you. Tell me I have a chance to fix this. Let me try. We can go to counseling, or I'll go by myself if you don't want to go with me. I'll take classes on how to be a better boyfriend. I'm sure they have some somewhere. And if I can't make things better, then I'll accept that I can't, and I'll respect any decision you make. I swear I will. But can I have a second chance? Just one more?”

Kurt felt lips press tentatively against his neck, begging for an answer, and with every shy kiss, Kurt felt himself cave. Kurt knew exactly what he wanted. He had for a while. And it didn't take DeLeon draping his handsome self all over Blaine for Kurt to decide.

Kurt wanted Blaine. Even when he didn't want Blaine, he wanted Blaine. Even when he couldn't forgive Blaine, he missed him. Even when he never wanted to speak to Blaine again, sometimes all he wanted was to hear his voice. He hated how much he wanted Blaine because he felt like he was betraying himself, but the fact remained.

And Blaine wanted him, too.

But that was too much for him to put into words without sobbing like an idiot.

"Grrr! Alright, you colossal pain in the ass!" Kurt groaned, feeling a smile on Blaines lips grow against his skin. "I cant believe were doing this again! But if we are, were doing it my way. Were taking it slow. Do you understand?"

“Of course,” Blaine said with a giggle, his lips eagerly finding Kurts, kissing him in reply.

***

It was 3 a.m., and it was sweltering. Not in general, and not outside considering it was winter, but in the loft, specifically in Blaines bedroom, the air was stifling.

Kurt moved over Blaines body with a deliberate slowness, pushing in deep, then pulling out to the tip, drawing out every low, long moan he possibly could from the man who arched beneath him, sweat rolling down his spine. Kurt had bound Blaine's wrists with a few of his old scarves, tied together end-to-end so that his left wrist was connected to his right by a string of fabric running underneath the mattress. The more he pulled, the tighter the knots became. There was no way for him to slip free.

Not that Blaine wanted to move. He never wanted to go anywhere ever again.

"God, I missed this," Blaine growled, his voice rough, his body burning. He rose up to meet Kurt when Kurt pushed in again, deeper this time, as if such a thing were even possible. But somehow, Kurt found a way. Kurt met Blaines mouth and kissed him hard, sucking his top lip between his teeth and biting to hear Blaine whine, to feel him shudder. "At least were not drunk this time," he remarked when Kurt pulled away.

"Yeah," Kurt agreed, grinning at Blaines debauched expression, at the fingernail tracks raising welts down his back, at his damp curls clinging to his cheeks, "but so much for taking things slow."