Blaine stared down at the heap of car parked in the driveway. He was wearing his oldest clothes with a pair of coveralls over them (recommended by Kurt, who would know since he often worked in his father's garage).

"Where do we even start?" Blaine asked Michael, who was standing next to him.

Michael shrugged, looking through the car repair book he'd purchased along with Blaine's coveralls earlier that afternoon. Michael had called Blaine to make sure he came straight home from school to work on the car, and "working on the car" had included a pit stop at the local auto parts store for supplies.

"Well," Blaine began. "We should probably start with the parts we can identify and go from there maybe?"

"Sure, sounds good," Michael agreed. They set about identifying parts of the engine that they knew and checking the state of those components. "How's school going?" he asked Blaine in between car talk.

"Okay, I guess," Blaine replied. "We've got Sectionals this weekend, so it's been kind of crazy."

"That's a singing competition, right?"

"Yeah. I'm excited; I've got a solo," Blaine told him.

Michael nodded. "You makin' some friends outside the glee club?"

"Not really," Blaine answered. "Most people tend to avoid me or talk about me behind my back, but that's okay. Kurt and I hang out a lot and glee club is nice. I don't have to be popular to be happy."

He thought back to the day before, when his and Kurt's "hanging out" had officially become their first date. He suppressed a smile, wanting to keep the news to himself for a little bit. He'd tell Michael and Elaine eventually, but he was pretty sure they'd be upset that he was actively dating a boy, and he didn't want anything ruining what he and Kurt had going.

He sighed, checking the oil level on the car. There was barely anything in it. "Needs some oil – we might have a leak." Michael nodded again and wrote that down.

It wasn't that Blaine minded working on the car with him, exactly. It was that he had a feeling that Michael was hoping it would make him straight or something. He toyed with pointing out that Kurt was gay and had been working on cars for years. He figured that wouldn't go over well either, so he didn't.

Finally, it grew too dark to work and they headed inside for dinner, planning to work on it again on Sunday.

*

Blaine woke up to the sounds of Julie freaking out on Sectionals Saturday. He ignored whatever had gotten her into a mood and set about getting himself together before preparing to fight her for the shower.

They finally got to the school and loaded into the bus for the drive down to Dalton, where the competition was being held. He'd worried that the Danvers would try to keep him from going but they hadn't. He wondered if his parents would come – he'd told the Andersons all about it during their weekly chat.

He and Kurt found a seat together on the bus, sharing headphones and holding hands where the others couldn't see. Kurt had been on board with keeping things quiet for the moment, once Blaine had explained about the Danvers. Kurt hadn't liked it at all when Blaine had told him what they'd said (he been very general about it, not specifying they'd been discussing Kurt at the time) and also how Blaine thought the new car was just a device to make him straight, so he was very willing to go along with the silent route.

Blaine's excitement grew the closer they got to Westerville. When the bus pulled into the Dalton parking lot he was practically bouncing in his seat. Kurt was smiling at him, clearly amused. Blaine couldn't help it. He was going to get to see his friends and show Kurt around Dalton. It was a little weird to be competing against the Warblers when he used to be one of them but he knew that they were still his friends in spite of that.

He was one of the first ones off the bus, Kurt and Julie right behind him.

"Wow," Julie breathed out, looking at Dalton.

"It's great, isn't it?" Blaine asked, grinning.

"It's like a freaking mansion," Julie replied. "Did they drag you out of here kicking and screaming? Because that's the only way I'd leave." Blaine frowned at her.

"Come on," Kurt said, tucking his arm in Blaine's elbow. "Show us around while Mr. Schue signs us in."
He led them down the spacious tiled hallways, pointing out various rooms before ending up outside the room used for Warbler rehearsal.

"Blaine Anderson," Sebastian spoke up, interrupting David in the middle of his pre-competition speech. The room erupted into loud voices, everyone crowding around Blaine. He was patted on the back and hugged in a flurry of activity.

Blaine introduced Julie and Kurt and there was momentary silence. He knew it was because the guys were taking in the resemblance between him and Julie and trying to reconcile what they thought had been true with what was staring them in the face. Still, talking with the guys in the rehearsal room felt like coming home. He'd nearly forgotten that he didn't go there any more by the time David called them to order.

"We're on in ten, guys," David shouted over the noise.

"We should go," Blaine replied, his heart aching with longing. He wanted nothing more than to just put on the uniform, go back to Dalton and be with the Warblers and then go home to his house and celebrate their win with his parents. They were just down the road and so close Blaine could almost smell his house. "I just wanted to show Julie and Kurt around."

"It's good to see you, killer," Sebastian said, smiling at him. Blaine flushed at his tone and backed away, heading for Kurt and Julie.

"Good luck!" he called as they headed out the doorway.

"Are you sure you've never had a boyfriend?" Julie asked when they were in the hallway. Blaine stared at her, startled.

"Why would you ask that?"

"Because that Sebastian guy looked at you like you were a piece of meat and he was starving," she explained. "And also because you and Kurt are pseudo-dating and I thought Kurt was going to eviscerate him where he stood." Blaine turned to Kurt, who was turning red.

"Can you keep a secret?" Blaine looked back at Julie. "Kurt and I are actually..."

"Oh my God!" Julie exclaimed, bouncing up and down. "You guys!" She flung herself at the both of them, squealing. "But why the secret?"

"Can you imagine what Elaine and Michael would say?" Blaine asked as they resumed walking.

"You could call them Mom and Dad, you know," she replied after a moment. "They are your parents."

"Julie," Blaine sighed her name.

"I'm just saying." She sounded put out now and Blaine didn't know how to make it better. Elaine and Michael might technically be his mother and father but the Andersons were his parents and they always would be. "Every time you call them by their first names, it hurts them." She seemed worked up now and Blaine didn't know what to say. "Do you know what it's like growing up in a house where your brother is missing?"

Blaine shook his head. He'd had some restrictions because of Cooper's actions, but nothing extreme.

"It's hell, Blaine," Julie hissed. "You can't go anywhere or do anything without your mother or father around. For years, Mom wouldn't even let me go on class fieldtrips. It was embarrassing."

"Julie," Blaine tried to interrupt, but he wasn't sure if he could even say something that would make this better.

"No, you don't get it, Blaine," she refuted. "When you went missing their hearts broke. For years after people told them to give up hope, because missing kids almost never get found after that long. But they kept hoping." She was crying now, wiping tears frantically with fingers. "They kept hoping and kept hurting and then bam! You called on the phone and told them you were alive and fine."

Blaine tried to reach out and take her hand but Julie pulled back.

"Why would you do that if you didn't want to know them?" she asked. "You had to know they would want you back, Blaine. Any mother who loves her children is going to want her missing child back." She choked on the words, coughing. "And you've done nothing but throw their love and concern in their faces. Sure, maybe they're not all that accepting about your sexuality, but I'd bet even money they'd work on it if it meant keeping you around."

"I'm sorry," Blaine whispered, feeling himself start to get teary.

"No," Julie replied, crossing her arms over her chest. "I don't think you are; not sorry enough, anyway." With that, she spun on the heel of her shoe and stalked off down the hall.

"We should go find the others," Kurt urged softly, once the clicking of Julie's shoes had faded off. He took Blaine's hand and Blaine smiled sadly at him, wiping away the tears that had spilled onto his cheeks. He was miserable and he had no idea what to do or how to fix it, but it didn't matter at the moment.

They still had a competition to win.

*

Dalton performed first. Blaine sat next to Kurt in the darkened auditorium, clenching Kurt's hand as he watched his friends sing and dance their way across the stage. The Warblers were good and they had home court advantage. New Directions could be in trouble.

Kurt squeezed his hand reassuringly and Blaine smiled at him in the dark. The second group was going on in a minute, and Blaine took a second while the lights were up to scan the audience. He didn't see either set of parents and he sighed.

Luckily, the next group started and Blaine was distracted by them. It was clear they'd be easy to beat and during their last song, they slid out of their seats and headed backstage in an orderly fashion. The second school finished and then it was time for them to go on. The stage was dark as they took their places and Blaine smiled, sitting down at the piano. The curtain rose and Blaine glanced at the audience as the spotlight shown down on him.

He froze, spotting his parents – both sets - in the audience. They weren't sitting next to each other, probably didn't even know the others were there. Blaine couldn't catch his breath for a second – the Andersons were right there and he hadn't seen them in weeks. The urge to jump off the stage and fling himself at them was strong and it was all Blaine to could to remain seated.

One of the boys coughed lightly and then Blaine turned back to the piano, putting his now shaking hands trembling on the keys. He pressed down on the keys, starting to play, but not the song he was supposed to. He'd instinctively started playing an older song that he'd always loved but now completely identified with. He'd listened to it a lot since the truth had come out. Blaine could feel the eyes of New Directions staring at him but he continued, opening his mouth to sing.

"Have you seen yourself today?" he began, "Could you recognize your face? Tell me tell me what to say, mine's lost without a trace."

He glanced at the audience again but he couldn't see their reactions. "Mama, can you help me please? My hero just stabbed me," Blaine sang, hoping his voice would hold out long enough to get him through the song, "with a knife that I did lend. Oh, Mama, who's my friend?"

When he hit the chorus Brittany seemed to get an idea. She swirled in time with the music and then grabbed Mike. They danced their way through the still members of New Directions. They were followed by the other couples pairing up and mimicking them as the song built.

"I had almost found my face," Blaine continued, feeling every word of the song. This was his story. "I was almost me. But my pride couldn't swallow what it ate; boy, I hope you're happy."

He could feel tears forming behind his eyes and the piano blurred a little. He forced himself to keep going though, singing his way through the chorus again before heading into the last verse.

"Today I found my face," he sang, "floating in a puddle of grace; a porcelain doll with cracks to mend. Oh, Mama, I found a friend."

The song came to an end and Blaine exhaled. The lights dimmed again and Blaine stood on shaky legs, moving to his new spot. The New Directions moved farther downstage, out of the way of the piano, and the next song began.
Blaine went through the motions, losing himself in the music and tried not to think about what he'd just done.

*

The first thing he heard when they made it back to their "green room" to wait while the judges deliberated was Santana screaming at him in Spanish. He had no idea what exactly she was saying but chances were that it wasn't good. Kurt was staring at him with worried eyes and Julie was in the corner, crying with Tina and refusing to look at him.

"What the hell, dude?" Puck snapped. "Were you trying to make us lose?"

"No," Blaine mouthed, unable to speak. He didn't know what he was feeling.

"Well it sure seemed like it," Tina agreed, her arm around Julie's shoulders.

"You can't just change the set list during the performance, Blaine," Mr. Schue added.

"I know, I'm sorry," he managed, wishing he were invisible. "I just... I wasn't thinking."

Mr. Schue sighed and Blaine wanted to curl up in a ball and hide. He'd let them down. They were going to lose now and it would be his fault. It was too much. He couldn't do this anymore. He didn't know how to live with this constant guilt. No matter what he did, he was disappointing someone.

"Are you all right?" Kurt whispered once the others had gone off the offensive.

"No," Blaine answered simply. No matter what, he knew he could tell Kurt the truth about anything. He wanted to tell Kurt what he was thinking, what he was feeling, what he was considering doing, but he couldn't stand to hurt him again.

A staff member from Dalton summoned Mr. Schue from the door way, and then Mr. Schue turned to the group.

"It's time."

*

Blaine lay in bed that night, thinking. The cheers of New Directions celebrating their win still echoed in his ears, but it didn't make him smile. The bus ride back had been boisterous, but Blaine's heart had ached as they'd pulled out of the Dalton parking lot and headed back to Lima.

The Danvers had congratulated them on the win and offered to take them out to celebrate, but Blaine had declined. The Andersons never approached him and Blaine wanted to cry as a result. Maybe they were afraid of what the Danvers would say – Blaine had no idea.

Amidst all of that, there was one simple truth that today had hammered home for him.

He couldn't stay here anymore. He was tired of pretending to be someone he wasn't. His birth certificate might say he was Blane Danvers but in his heart he was Blaine Anderson. It wasn't fair for the Danvers to ask him to give up the Andersons and live with them instead.

Maybe that made him selfish but he didn't care anymore.

He got up out of his bed and went down the hall, knocking on the Elaine and Michael's door.

"Come in," Elaine's voice called out. Blaine opened the door, staring at them. "Blaine, sweetie, what's the matter?"

He took a deep breath. "My name is Blaine Devon Anderson," he said softly. "I live in Westerville, Ohio and I go to Dalton Academy." Elaine looked shocked and like she was about to cry. "And I want to go home."

With that, he turned and shut their door, heading for his room. He passed Julie on the way, her betrayed face searing into him, right to his heart. She just turned and went into her room, slamming the door.

Blaine held his head up as he went into his bedroom and shut the door.

It was done.