Just Like the White Winged Dove
SKSuncloud
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Just Like the White Winged Dove: Chapter 15


T - Words: 5,716 - Last Updated: Jul 06, 2012
Story: Complete - Chapters: 23/23 - Created: Feb 02, 2012 - Updated: Jul 06, 2012
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            "He won't answer my texts. He won't answer my calls. He hates me. He must hate me. Oh, god! Why am I such a complete loser?!" Blaine yelled, punching the bag in the Dalton Academy gym to punctuate every sentence. It was over a week later, a week that had not been going well and had involved almost daily Kurt-interventions by the Warblers to keep Blaine from either slipping into a pit of moping and despair or carrying through with threats to go straight to McKinley and confront to boy of his dreams.

            Wes put a hand on his shoulder. "You're being dramatic."

            "I feel dramatic!" Blaine fumed, punching the bag again.

            "I'll say," Trent commented. Several of the Warblers were also in gym sweats and had joined in with the boxing therapy that Blaine so desperately needed. Their star had been jilted. Short of letting him march over to McKinley and demanding justice, they didn't know what else to do to release him from his funk. Venting through boxing worked better than anything else to clear Blaine's head. Music hadn't been working; he seemed off during rehearsals, and kept forgetting lyrics or messing up choreography and then apologizing pathetically.

            "Maybe you should forget about him," Wes suggested gently.

            In a single motion, Blaine shrugged him off, spun full circle and threw his hands up, yelling, "HOW?!"

            "He has kinda been blowing you off a lot," Thad supplied. Blaine's face fell and then his muscles tightened. He looked like he was going to rush at Thad.

            David stepped forward. "Come on, Blaine. Let's try this: what do you wish you could say to him?"

            Blaine punched the bag rapidly a few times and then leaned his forehead against it, shooting a glare at Thad who responded with clapping his hands together in front of his face and giving Blaine an apologetic look. Blaine shrugged, "I don't know." He punched the bag again halfheartedly. "I want to ask him why he chose his stupid Glee club over me..." He punched the bag again.

            "Hey now, Glee is not stupid," David pointed out. "But think, Blaine! No questions. What do you want to say to him?"

            Blaine took a deep breath, looked between all of them and bit his lip. "I... I think I could say it in a song... Could we maybe change our eleven o'clock number for Regionals?"

            There was a slight groan, because they'd been working on their P!NK medley for so long now.

"Maybe. We can bring it before the council," Wes promised, ignoring the way Blaine's eyes scanned between him, David, and Thad, making it obvious that he'd noted that the entire council was currently present. "But we have to approve it first. Your last idea for a song to Kurt might have been effective, but it was kinda really weird." He looked around for confirmation and all the other boys shrugged and nodded with him.

            Blaine frowned. "What was weird about it? ‘Animal' was romantic." His countenance had changed again. The aggression had melted away and, in a bipolar sort of way, he was gentle Dr Jeckyll all over again.

            David patted his shoulder. "Come on. Shower time now, we'll explain it to you later."

            "The song I want to sing is called ‘When I Get You Alone' and it's by this guy, Robin Thicke..." Blaine explained, enthusiastically, while he unwrapped his gloves.

            Thad raised his eyebrows, but after a second of consideration, nodded with approval. Wes, on the other hand, quickly cut in. "That's a No. But, we'll work on it. In fact, I might have a song that would be perfect for you." They headed off the gym floor and to the locker rooms. Blaine was becoming more and more interested in Wes's idea for the Regionals number.

 

Kurt sat through Glee for the first week, his heart not really in it anymore. All week he'd been getting texts from Blaine begging him to answer.

            Please tell me things are different today. Please say you'll still be there for coffee.

            Okay, so no coffee then.

            I miss you, Kurt.

            What if I just give the New Directions our setlist and apologize for making them nervous or whatever and I sweep you off your feet and into my arms tonight?

            Please answer.

            I know you can't answer. I'm being stupid. I'm sorry I'm so stupid.

The rest of the club settled on a subject for a song and started writing. Kurt felt like an outcast. When Friday rolled around he stopped Rachel in the hall. "I'm pulling out of the duet. It's your solo now."

She looked excited for a split second before frowning at him, "What? But we sound amazing. Seriously, you need to sing this with me."

With no enthusiasm, he just shrugged and said, "It's your song. You're the star, Rachel. Go shine." Then he walked away.

            Now it's the weekend. Last weekend was amazing. I miss you.

            I just want to know that you're still alive. Mercedes won't text me either.

            Or Mike Chang, or Tina. Your friends hate me.

            I don't mean that. I'm rambling. I won't text you for the rest of the weekend. I'm so sorry.

            Okay, so Rachel texted me. That was weird.

            No, I said I'd stop. I'm sorry. I feel like an idiot.

            Kurt found himself scrolling through the texts constantly, unable to delete any and feeling more and more guilty. The mental commentary he imagined to go with each text got more apologetic and self deprecating each time. "I'm so sorry, please don't hate me."

He knew he should have quit New Directions stayed with Blaine, especially now that he'd given up on the duet and hadn't even contributed to the songwriting.

He spent that weekend hanging out at the shop with his dad and being mostly useless. He had never learned the names of half the parts, so he needed a description of everything Burt asked him for to even be useful handing items from the bench to the car.

Around noon on Saturday Burt finally said, "Okay, there is no way you're spending the whole day here. What's up? Shouldn't you be going out with Blaine or something?"

Kurt leaned against the car and shrugged. Burt wiped his hands on a rag and frowned. His son was wearing grease-monkey overalls and a T-shirt and hadn't done his hair. It was practical, but knowing Kurt, it was cause for concern.

"Are you having boy trouble? Because I swear I'll kick that kid's ass if he's done anything to you."

"No, dad. It's nothing like that. I'm fine. Blaine's wonderful. It's not boy trouble." He didn't know how to tell Burt that he was having boy troubles, but that they weren't Blaine's fault. He didn't want to get Finn in trouble. It was hard enough to avoid Finn, since they lived together and he also worked in the shop. If Burt got mad at him... it really wasn't something Kurt wanted to deal with on top of everything happening in New Directions.

He had considered staying home to avoid Finn, but the idea of spending the whole weekend completely alone didn't appeal to him either. He was refusing to talk to his friends too-he figured that if he couldn't text Blaine, he might as well not text anyone. Finn didn't even seem to notice that Kurt never made eye contact with him and rarely responded when he spoke. He still tried to talk to Kurt during meals or when they passed in the hall. At least spending the weekend with his dad, Kurt could be assured some human contact that didn't make him feel like the world was out to get him.

"Then what's up? You've never spent a Saturday with me before. Not since you got your driver's license, anyway."

"So? I can spend time with you," Kurt said.

"Yeah, sure, but that doesn't mean you do. Now seriously, Kurt. What's up?"

Kurt shrugged, "You and I barely see each other." He tried to look nonchalant, but then his eyes met his dad's. His dad had supported him through everything. He always gave the best advice and made Kurt feel better, but it hadn't been all that long since the same man had been lying unconscious in a hospital bed. Kurt glanced down at the floor. His dad didn't need to know about the high school drama. "I'm just really stressed about Regionals."

"That's this weekend, right? Carole and I are gonna be there, rooting for you!" Burt leaned back inside the car to mess with something. When Kurt didn't respond he added, "You know if there's something you need to talk about, I'll always be here for you."

Kurt smiled, "I know, Dad," he replied, feeling miserable inside. After a pause he asked, "Hey Dad?"

"Yup?" was the response from under the hood.

Kurt rolled the words around in his head so they'd come out as non-directive as possible. "Do you like Blaine?"

Burt popped his head out and gave Kurt a stern look. "Yes I do, he seems like a good kid and all, but I don't think that's important." He stood up straight and looked at Kurt squarely. Kurt was avoiding his gaze. "I think what's really important is, do you like Blaine?"

Kurt didn't even hesitate, he just nodded and said, "Yes."

Burt leaned back inside the car again, "Then what're you doin' asking me for?"

Kurt just nodded. His dad was right. His dad was always right. He leaned forward and picked up an oddly shaped tool or part and held it up when his dad came back out from under the hood a moment later. "What's this?"

Burt took it and launched into a description of the part and its use, not ignoring the fact that his son was definitely upset and, once again, not telling him something.

 

            So... it's Monday now...

            I guess I have to wait till the end of the week.

This isn't easy.

            Late on Sunday night, Kurt realized that, although he'd stopped going to see Miss Pillsbury after his confrontation with Dave Karofsky had gone so well, he still had counseling sessions set up through the rest of the semester. He set his alarm and woke up especially early on Monday, got ready, and drove to school. Once inside, he was glad to see that Miss Pillsbury was already there, vigorously scrubbing at her office door handle, wearing rubber gloves up to her elbows.

            "Miss Pillsbury?" he said getting her attention.

            She looked up, alarmed, "Oh! Oh, Kurt! What a surprise! I thought you decided not to keep coming in. I'm just... just cleaning."

            He raised his eyebrows and nodded. "I know I haven't been coming in lately, but I needed to talk to someone. Are you busy this morning?"

            "No. Of course you can talk to me!" then she looked down at her hands, which were trembling, and looked at the door handle. "Just... give me a minute. Is that alright?"

            Kurt looked up and down the hall. No one was even there yet. "Would it be okay for me to start talking while you... keep doing that?"

            She looked surprised and then smiled. "Oh, yes, of course!"

            "You won't tell anyone I came in to talk to you, especially Mr. Schuester, right?" he said softly.

            "Of course, Kurt. You know our meetings are always completely confidential."

            "Okay," he stepped past her and into the office, then turned the chair so it was facing the door. She had already gone back to scrubbing. It occurred to Kurt that she might not even be able pay attention to both him and the neurotic cleaning, but he didn't really care.

            "I chose Glee over my boyfriend last week."

            She spritzed the door handle with more cleaning solution. "You did? Why? I mean...What do you mean?"

            Kurt bit his lower lip. "Miss Pillsbury, Finn's supposed to be my stepbrother, but it seems like instead of being happy for me for having found Blaine, who, I mean, is so amazing, in just every way ...um... It seems like Finn is trying to ruin it." There was no response so he kept going. "Somehow he managed to convince everyone in the club that Blaine's an enemy spy and that our relationship is compromising New Direction's chance at Regionals."

            "Is your relationship with Blaine compromising the club?" she asked.

            Kurt shifted uncomfortably. "No. It's not compromising it nearly as much as Finn and his bad attitude are. We haven't done anything wrong."

            "Are you sure?"

            "Blaine and I don't even talk about Glee club. I mean, even if Blaine knew we were doing original songs, he wouldn't use that as an advantage to beat us. He's not like that. They all know he's not like that. Everyone likes Blaine. Everyone likes the Warblers! At least, I thought they did."

            Miss Pillsbury pulled out a toothbrush now and started scrubbing even more meticulously. "Well, then what made the club think Blaine's a threat?"

            "Finn."

            "How so?"

            "He..." Kurt shifted uncomfortably again. "He allegedly took pictures of us... together in the back seat of my car," he rushed through the last part.

            Miss Pillsbury's eyes went wide. "Um. Okay. That's a little weird. Kinda stalkery. But I'm confused, Kurt. Were the pictures of you trading secret information?"

            "No... they were... um. Actually, I didn't see them. But we were just kissing," Kurt could feel how red he was, it was blurring his vision.

            "Okay. Alright.... No," she turned and looked at him, "No, I'm still confused, Kurt. Why would that turn the club against you? I know how much they all love you. I'd think they'd be happy for you."

            "Yes! I thought so too, but..." he trailed away and started picking at the edges of his nails. Miss Pillsbury went back to working feverishly on the door.

            "But?"

            "But... we weren't supposed to be alone together. They all voted- without my consent, mind you-that I shouldn't be alone with Blaine until after Regionals."

            She nodded, "And you broke that?"

            Kurt swallowed the lump in his chest. "...Yes."

            "Why?"

            He glanced around the room. He felt like he was so powerless. "Because... I was upset. I felt betrayed that they didn't trust me... that Finn didn't trust me. I just wanted to be with my boyfriend."

            "So... it sounds like they felt a little betrayed too."

            "...Yeah. Maybe."

            "Well, did you apologize?"

            "For what?"

            "For betraying them."

            Kurt's face fell. "I didn't betray anyone."

            "Yes, but they felt like you did. And you're their friend. You don't have to, but I think that you're capable of being the bigger man, Kurt, and to get what you want, maybe you should be the first one to say you're sorry."

            He narrowed his eyes at her, but nodded slowly. It was annoying, and not what he wanted to hear, but it made sense. "Normally I am good at taking the moral highroad."

            "Yes you are," she agreed.

            He picked at his nails again. "I wonder what's wrong with me?"

            "There's nothing wrong with you, Kurt."

            "Usually I'm so good at coming up with snappy responses and sticking to what I believe in. I'm almost as good as Rachel at getting what I want... But last week, I...I just felt so defeated. I didn't expect them all to turn on me like that. Especially Mercedes and Tina... and Puck... I didn't mean to betray their trust, I just... I called Blaine. I didn't know what else to do. I wanted to see him and nothing else made sense. You should be allowed to do that, shouldn't you? When you're dating someone?"

            Miss Pillsbury nodded. "But what you said was that you chose Glee over Blaine."

            Now the lump was coming back, reinforced with tears. "Yes."

            "How does that work?"

            Kurt shrugged. "Well... after... everything, they said I could either be in Glee, or be with Blaine."

            "They made you break up with him?"

            "...No."

            "No?"

            "I can't contact him at all until after Regionals," he blinked hard.

            She looked over at him and said gently, "That's in a week."

            "It's already been a week."

            "And you want to contact him?"

            Kurt paused, "Of course I do."

            "But you want to stay in Glee."

            "Yes."

            "Why?"

            "Because... I love Glee."

            "But, you love Blaine."

            Kurt's face fell. His heart was sinking in his chest and he was sinking lower in the chair like maybe it would eat him up if he sank low enough. He was glad no one had walked by yet to see his terrible posture. After a moment, Miss Pillsbury spoke again.

            "Is that why you're really here, Kurt? To talk about why you didn't choose Blaine?"

            Kurt took a staggering breath, "He keeps texting me. I feel awful."

"Why don't you text him back?"

"I gave up the duet with Rachel. I don't even feel like I'm part of the Glee club anymore," he said, trying to divert the question.

            "And yet, you haven't contacted him."         

            Kurt took a deep breath. He could see where she was going with this. He didn't want to keep pretending he was an idiot just to hear her ask him what he had already realized. He whispered, "Can we shut the door?"

            Miss Pillsbury looked forlornly at the door handle, gave it another few good scrubs with the toothbrush, then agreed, picked up her things, and walked inside, shutting the door behind her. Kurt waited until she had deposited all her cleaning supplies in their designated location before speaking again.

            "What if Finn got to me too?" He said softly.

            "What do you mean?"

            "I think... maybe I believed what Finn said. What if... I've been doubting Blaine? He's been nothing but a gentleman and sweet and honest and perfect, but... it's like Finn planted this idea in my head and I can't let go of it."

            "You think Blaine might just be using you?"

            "No... No. I just... I trust Finn. I don't understand why he'd say something, or do something like this if it wasn't because he was legitimately concerned and... trying to help me."

            Miss Pillsbury was sitting at her desk now and she was looking at him very seriously. He'd turned his chair so they were facing each other. "Kurt, listen to me very carefully. I need to ask you: why do you think that about Finn?"

            "...What?"

             She tapped her nails on her desk twice then started again. "I hate to say it, but Finn hasn't exactly been there for you all that often. Puck's the one who stood up for you when you were getting bullied. And Mercedes is your real friend. From what I hear, even Rachel has tried to stand up for you over and over again. Finn has hardly been on your side at all, Kurt. He sort of shows up at the end and takes credit for solving a problem when, really he just stood by and let it reach its boiling point. I know he's the ‘golden boy,' but... I just don't see any reason you should believe in him. I know I haven't met Blaine, but... which one of them do you actually trust more?"

            "Finn is my brother..."

            "He's your stepbrother, Kurt, and he has problems too. He broke up with Miss Berry and won't talk about it, he's putting you off and turning your friends against you, last year he flip-flopped around about who he was dating with no regard for other people's feelings. I mean, Kurt, if we're choosing heroes... I don't think yours is Finn."

            Kurt stayed silent for several minutes. There was no way to refute what she'd said. He didn't even have an "Oh, but what about this time!" example that didn't come with a "Yeah, but..." attached.

"Rachel told me to be careful around Blaine too," he tried, and then immediately realized, "But that was before she got to know him."

"What do you think?" Miss Pillsbury asked.

Kurt shook his head and didn't speak for several long seconds. "What should I do? I've ruined everything. I already blew him off for a week, why should Blaine even want to speak to me after this? And..." his throat was constricting as he choked out the rest of his sentence. "If I give up on Glee now, how will I ever get out of Ohio?" He took a tissue off her desk and pressed it to his cheeks.

            Miss Pillsbury considered him for a moment, then took a breath. "I think you have two options, Kurt. Regionals are at the end of this week. You can go back to Glee and make the most out of it, take back the duet, let yourself shine, because you're right, getting to Nationals could be your ticket to Broadway or wherever else you have your heart set. And you can hope that Blaine is a better guy than Finn, which... I'm going to go out on a limb and say is very likely," she shrugged when he looked up at her. "And hope that he'll still be there for you afterwards."

"What's my other option?" he asked, grinding his teeth slightly.

"Leave Glee, call Blaine right now and tell him you're sorry and hope he can forgive you and then deal with whatever friends you might lose here at McKinley. Sure, not everyone in New Directions will judge you, but losing you right before Regionals would prove that Finn was right all along, don't you think? And Finn lives with you now. How's that going to work?"

Kurt closed his eyes. "What do you think I should do?"

"I think you're at that point, Kurt. It can go either way and no matter what, you're going to be begging for somebody's forgiveness after Regionals. Who do you think is more likely to give it to you? Finn...or Blaine?"

            Kurt sucked in his lips and nodded, then smiled slightly. The answer was obvious. He stood up. "Thank you Miss Pillsbury."

            "Oh? Are you sure that's all? We can talk for another ten minutes if you want to." Outside students were starting to gather in the halls, milling about around their lockers before class.

            "No, I think this has helped a lot," he assured her as he shouldered his bag and opened the door to leave. "Thanks."

            She smiled back. "Anytime."

 

            In first period, Kurt sat his things down next to Rachel and turned squarely toward her. "We're back on for the duet," he announced. She clapped her hands and squeaked.

 

            I just realized that I don't even know if you're allowed to read these. I hope you're reading them. I hope your phone isn't locked up in your evil stepbrother's sock drawer.

            I didn't mean that. I don't think Finn's evil. I just miss you, Kurt. I want to see you.

            I miss you.

            Ok. Wednesday. Still no coffee?

Regionals is just three days now and The Warblers have agreed to change something. This Saturday I'm going to be singing to you. Please listen carefully.

 

            New Directions arrived early on Saturday to change into their show costumes and apply their stage make-up. They'd written, practiced, and perfected their songs and even Kurt managed to feel genuine enthusiasm about them by the end of the week.

He'd made a formal apology to the group the same day as his meeting with Miss Pillsbury. Many members of the club were just happy he seemed okay again and suggested lifting the sentence and letting him text Blaine. However, in light of Regionals on the horizon, he was ultimately asked to continue without contact. After some apologies, they held a big group hug, then worked together amicably. Finn had stayed silent at the back of the room.

            Before they made their way out into the audience, Kurt received the first text he'd gotten from Blaine since Wednesday.

            I hope you'll be listening.

            They were in the last slot, and noticed immediately that the Warblers were in the first. As they sat down in their assigned section in the audience, Kurt asked for their permission to send a single word to Blaine so that he'd receive it before the Warblers went on.

            Because it being too late for it to change anything now, and because they were riding on the excitement of how prepared they were this time around, the group voted Yes.

            From backstage where the Warblers were getting ready, Blaine, almost praying due to nervousness and anticipation, clutching his phone with both hands, received a text.

            Courage!

 

            The lights went out and the curtain rose in the darkness, then a spotlight slowly lit the stage, front and center. Blaine was standing there, head bowed, and Kurt's heart skipped a beat. Behind Blaine you could barely make out the rest of the Warblers, standing in two rows, spread out on the risers. In a breath, the first note left their throats, and Blaine, with his head still bowed, started singing.

            "I walked across an empty land, I knew the pathway like the back of my hand." Behind Blaine, the Warblers had started moving, very slowly strolling between one another, changing spaces on the stage. "I felt the earth beneath my feet, sat by the river and it made me complete."

            Now the stage lights shot on and Blaine raised his head. Even with the glare of the lights, Blaine looked straight into the glare at the spot he knew Kurt was sitting.

            "Oh simple thing, where have you gone?" The Warblers had stopped moving and were facing to the left side of the stage. As the chorus progressed, they turned, row by row, facing center. "I'm getting old and I need something to rely on. So tell me when you're gonna let me in. I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin."

            The next verse started and the Warblers stepped forward, front row, then back, and Blaine turned his back on the audience and started walking toward the back of the stage, his voice losing none of its power. "I came across a fallen tree, I felt the branches of it looking at me." When he reached the top of the risers at the far side of the stage, he turned around again, "Is this the place we used to love?" he spread his arms, "Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?"

            Through the chorus they held their positions, then Blaine stepped forward, and the Warblers retreated a step in the same time. "And if you have a minute, why don't we go," he continued walking slowly till he hit the edge of the stage all through, "Talk about it somewhere only we know? This could be the end of everything, so why don't we go somewhere only we know?" His face changed all of a sudden in the pause and glanced back over his shoulder for the second, "Somewhere only we know."

            The Warblers were positioned and took over as the crescendo built and all at once Blaine had leapt off the stage and was rushing down the aisle. The houselights rose to just above dim and the spotlight followed him. He came level to Kurt's row and for the first time in two weeks he was staring directly at his boyfriend, seating the third seat in from the edge and watching him, mouth agape. Blaine took a deep breath before belting out, "And if you have a minute, why don't we go talk about it somewhere only we know? This could be the end of everything, so why don't we go? So why don't we go?"

He stepped right up to the row and held out his hand to Kurt, who couldn't help but take it, almost crying from his heart beating so fast. He was smiling and looked absolutely stunning, dressed in all black, and in the waves of the audience, it was just the two of them.

Luckily the Warblers had begun moving again and were pulling some attention, but Blaine pulled Kurt up out of his seat, around Rachel and Quinn, and as Kurt stumbled into the aisle, he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend and pressed his face into Kurt's shoulder, forgetting the performance for that one moment when smelled the light musk of Kurt's body wash and feel the soft skin of Kurt's neck against his cheek. When Kurt fell into him and hugged back, whispering his name, Blaine imagined grabbing him by the hand, barreling through the main doors and running away together, forgetting this performance, this town, this state, and just being together forever. However, everything snapped back to reality almost as fast as it had left and he couldn't even linger in Kurt's arms because he heard his cue to come back in. He let go of Kurt, letting their hands linger together as long as possible while he stepped backwards toward the stage.

"This could be the end of everything, so why don't we go somewhere only we know?" He just made it back to the edge of the stage, walking backwards the whole way by the time the second, "Somewhere only we know" came in. Kurt was still standing in the aisle, looking dazed and perfect and staring straight at him. Blaine nodded slightly.

"Somewhere only we know."

 

The Warbler's second performance was P!NK's "Raise Your Glass" and Blaine barely had time to leap onto the stage during the applause and blow a kiss to Kurt, who realized he'd better sit back down, before the choreography for the second number picked up and they were once again bringing the crowd to their feet.

There was a shuffle once the Warblers finished and Kurt tried to push past the rest of the group to run backstage to find Blaine, who had met his gaze during their final bow and looked at him so longingly that Kurt just wanted to be holding him again. However, Rachel caught his hand. "We have to warm up," she reminded him.

Kurt stopped himself before he said, "I know, I just want to find Blaine first." Finn was giving him a look like he was challenging him to even try running off. It occurred to Kurt that if he could just last through the next show choir's performance and their own, he would be out of the woods.

He was half wishing that Blaine would be leaning against the door to the warm-up room, waiting for them, but there were no Dalton blazers in sight. They warmed up, he and Rachel taking extra time to harmonize their voices and give each other confidence, then, it seemed like way too quickly, they were headed toward the stage.

 

The curtain rose to reveal Rachel Berry standing alone on the stage, just off of center at one of two stand microphones placed about two yards apart. She looked to one side of the stage, and then her eyes lingered on the other side, the side she was closest too, and she began singing the first verse of the song she had written herself. Kurt bit his lower lip from where he stood offstage. She was singing her part of the song to Finn.

The first verse drew into the chorus, and after the question "But how many times will it take? How many times will it take for me to get it right?" She turned and smiled at Kurt, repeating, "To get it right..." as he took a breath, entered, and stepped up to the microphone.

The houselights weren't completely out, so he found the sea of blue and red blazers and pinpointed Blaine just before the lights changed. He glanced back at Rachel, then fixated back on the spot where Blaine was sitting. His voice dropped from its usual contra tenor high-range. With this song, he'd struggled to get out of his comfort zone, because as Rachel pointed out, that was what the song was really about, and he was singing in a deeper register than he'd ever sung a sustained song before. "Can I start again with my faith shaken? Cause I can't go back and undo this. I just have to stay and face my mistakes, but if I get stronger and wiser," he looked back at Rachel and they harmonized the bridge, "I'll get through this."

            They turned back to the audience and sang together through, "What can you do when your good isn't good enough, and all that you touch tumbles down?"

            Then Rachel picked up, "But how many times will it take?"

            And Kurt answered, "Oh how many times will it take for me, to get it right."

            They each took their microphone from its stand and they walked quickly, switching positions on the stage. They called and responded, Rachel taking, "So I throw up my fist," then Kurt, "Throw a punch in the air!" which he did, and then Rachel sang, "And accept the truth that sometimes life isn't fair! Yeah, I'll send down a wish," and Kurt came back reached out toward Blaine as he and Rachel crossed each other in the front of the stage again. "Yeah, I'll send up a prayer, that finally someone will see..." The song had changed for him. For Rachel, she was still asking for forgiveness, still asking the question of how to get it right, but for Kurt it had changed from the moment Blaine leapt off that stage. He wasn't asking how anymore. The song had become a promise, a promise that he would get it right, and he wanted Blaine to know. He bent forward, drawing in air to hold out the note that wasn't in his naturally comfortable range, but he'd worked with Rachel on it all week and had insisted on stealing this line from her after winning three coin tosses in a row. He faced straight at Blaine and hit the note perfectly. "...how much I care!"

            The rest of the club began moving onto the stage, supplying back-up while Rachel took over the lines. He came back in on the last "How many times will it take?" and then he and Rachel placed their microphones back in the stands, and he sang,  "To get it right," and she replied with the same line, fading out to the last note. He smiled at her, and the audience erupted.

            Blaine was on his feet, and his was the only face Kurt could see.

 


Comments

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what is finn problem he is getting right on my nerves :-(

Haha! That's exactly how I feel about him when I watch the show. XD