July 22, 2012, 5:32 p.m.
Don't Look Back
Don't Look Back: Chapter 10
E - Words: 8,445 - Last Updated: Jul 22, 2012 Story: Complete - Chapters: 13/13 - Created: Jun 18, 2012 - Updated: Jul 22, 2012 1,754 0 0 0 1
By the time Blaine reached the bottom of the stairs, his entire body is trembling with rage. Cooper met him as he crossed the threshold of the living room, his eyes widening at the terrifying expression in Blaine's eyes. He stepped in front of the younger boy, cutting him off before he could cross the small hallway into their father's study.
"B, calm down," Cooper tried to soothe, rubbing a hand across the top of Blaine's arm. "You're not going to accomplish anything like this. You--"
"No, Cooper! I have every right to be angry right now. Do not tell me how to feel!" Blaine snapped. Cooper rocked back on his heels in shock. Blaine had never spoken to him that way before.
In the back of his mind, he knew that none of this was Cooper's fault, but he couldn't bring himself to listen to that rational part right now. Cooper was frozen so Blaine sidestepped him; he'd apologize to his brother later.
He stepped into his father's study and slammed his hand down on the desk heavily.
His father jumped out of his chair and crossed to point a finger directly in Blaine's face. "You listen to me! You will not--"
"No! You listen to me!" He slapped his father's hand away from his face and took a deliberate step forward. "I told you—I told you explicitly that you were not to lay a hand on him! You had no right to touch him!" Blaine shouted.
Cooper had rallied and darted into the room, putting a hand on Blaine's shoulder and trying to pull him backwards, clearly sensing that he was just about to lose control of himself. He shook off Cooper's hand and took another step forward, causing the older man to have to take a small step back.
His father raised his voice. "I have every right to touch him! He's nothing, Blaine! I don't know what little game you and Cooper have been playing with that slave. You've been deluding yourselves into thinking that he's something special while you were playing house, and I'm sure that he was more than happy to take the handouts, but he's nothing, Blaine! No matter how much you spoil him and treat him like he's part of the family" The words were lilting and mocking. "He will never be anything more than a reject, trash."
A feral snarl ripped out of Blaine and he launched himself forward toward his father, but he was stopped by a pair of hands against his chest, pushing him backward, Kurt.
"Blaine!" Kurt yelled, his voice shocked. "Blaine, honey, stop!"
Blaine kept his eyes locked on his father as he felt Kurt trying to push him back. His father's eyes had flown open wide, his face twisting with disgust. "What did he just call you?" The man grabbed Kurt by the arm to pull him away from Blaine, but Blaine knocked his hand away roughly and gave his father a hard shove backward.
He dove forward quickly to try and grab Blaine, but Kurt intercepted, pushing against the man's chest, hard, and sending him stumbling back to knock into his desk, his eyes wide.
"You leave Blaine alone!" Kurt said loudly, pointing toward the man.
"How dare you speak to me that way? I won't stand for it!"
"No! I won't stand for the way you're treating Blaine. Your son is kind and caring and gentle in a way that I've never seen before, and I refuse to let you do anything to jeopardize that. I've seen a lot of awful things, but I can't think of anything that would be more of an injustice than to let you do anything to corrupt that innocence."
Blaine's father just stood with his mouth hanging open dumbly. Cooper watched the entire scene, his eyes darting between Kurt and his father, doing his best to suppress the smile that was tugging at the corners of his lips. Blaine's eyes were brimming with tears as he watched Kurt stand up for him. "K-Kurt." The word came out as a reverent breath.
Kurt took Blaine's hand and squeezed it in his own. "You can do whatever you want to me. Believe me, I've taken worse, but I refuse to let you hurt Blaine in any way."
He tugged on Blaine's arm and led him out of the study, leaving Cooper and Blaine's father frozen and speechless behind him. "Come on, sweetheart," Kurt whispered, sliding his thumb across Blaine's knuckles as he led him up the stairs.
The moment they'd made it back into Blaine's bedroom, Blaine was crowding Kurt against the door, surging their lips together desperately, moaning quietly into Kurt's mouth at the relief caused by the contact. Kurt's hands came up to frame Blaine's face, his thumbs sliding across the apples of Blaine's cheeks as he pulled away and rested his forehead against Blaine's. "Calm down, Blaine. It's okay."
Blaine was exhausted. As he looked into Kurt's eyes, soft and compassionate, safe, and felt himself breaking down. "K-Kurt..." he whimpered before dissolving into tears. Kurt's hand was quickly on his back, leading him toward the bed and then pulling him close. Blaine curled into his side and cried, weeks of frustration and worry and anger pouring out in a fit of broken sobs. He nuzzled closer to Kurt and let himself be comforted.
Kurt held him tightly against his side and murmured soothing nonsense into his ear as Blaine clung to him as though he was a life preserver, he kind of was.
He wasn't sure how much later it was, but he felt groggy so he must have fallen asleep. Kurt's arm was still wrapped tightly around his middle and a hand was carding softly through his hair. He heard Kurt's voice speaking to someone in a whisper.
"No, Cooper. It's okay. I promise." Kurt's voice was soft and reassuring, and Blaine wondered when the tables had turned so drastically.
"I just--" Cooper started before breaking off and letting out a breath in a gust. Blaine didn't have to open his eyes to know that his brother had just dragged a hand roughly through his own hair. "I just wanted to get you out of the room before he came back, Kurt. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."
"Cooper, please, stop apologizing. I'm fine. We're fine," Kurt assured. "Blaine said that you were the one who called him to come help me."
"Yeah," Cooper replied, his voice a bit awkward.
"He also told me that you two had talked about taking me to New York."
An awkward silence hung over the room. The only sound was breathing somewhere close and the steady beat of Kurt's heart, loud in Blaine's ears.
Cooper broke the silence, his voice low and serious. "It would be the safest place for you. You can stay with me and go back to school. You could do all the things you should be able to do. I've already called and pulled some strings and got you into an advanced program so you might actually be able to catch up to where you should be and graduate the same year as Blaine."
Kurt sighed and dropped a kiss to the top of Blaine's hair, thumbing away a stray curl on his forehead. "I hate leaving him, Cooper. None of this is fair for him. I've caused so much trouble and I'm leaving him to deal with it all. Alone."
"You haven't caused any trouble, Kurt. Don't think like that. Blaine loves you. You know that," Cooper said quickly.
"I know he does, and I love him more than anything, which is why I hate leaving him here. Cooper, he's such a kind soul and it kills me what your father is doing to him. He's going to end up making him bitter and resentful, and that would be a tragedy. He's just good, and I don't want anything to change that. I just don't want him to end up like me."
"Like you?" Cooper's voice was confused.
"Cynical. I've seen the badness in the world, and I know you have too. But, Blaine hasn't. He knows it's there, in the abstract, but he's never seen it the way we have. He still sees the goodness in everyone because he's never had a reason not to doubt that there is good in everyone. I don't ever want him to lose that, Cooper. I'll do whatever it takes to protect that."
Blaine suddenly felt guilty for eavesdropping and opened his eyes slowly, making a show of waking up.
Kurt's tone shifted to something much softer, more gentle. "Hey, sweetheart. How are you feeling?"
"I'm better," Blaine answered, his voice was still a little rough from crying and his eyes burned from the tears, but he did feel better after letting all the emotion out. "How are you?"
"I'm fine. Don't worry about me," Kurt said fondly, dropping a kiss to Blaine's forehead.
The bruise that marked high on his cheek stood in stark contrast to his words, but Blaine let it go. He noticed Cooper shifting his weight awkwardly, looking down at his feet. "Coop, I'm really sorry for snapping at you earlier."
Cooper looked up, a kind smile on his face. "Don't worry about it, B. You were upset. I just came up here to apologize to Kurt."
Kurt smiled in Cooper's direction before turning to drop a kiss to the top of Blaine's hair. "We've talked about New York and school. Did you know that he got me into some kind of an advanced program? I'll be able to graduate." Kurt's voice was bright, almost overly so. Blaine was sure that he was laying it on a little thick for his sake, but there was genuine excitement on his face.
"Yeah, he told me about that," Blaine said brightly, sitting up and leaning into Kurt's side. Kurt tightened his arm around Blaine's middle and rested his head against his shoulder.
Cooper shifted again. "I wanted to tell you guys that mom and dad are staying in tonight, so you'd probably better stay upstairs, Kurt. I'm going out to get a pizza for the three of us. I don't think dad's especially fond of me right now either." He looked down, trying to look sheepish but unable to fight the smile quirking up the corners of his lips.
"What'd you do, Cooper?" Kurt asked, intensely curious.
Cooper laughed out an awkward sound. "I may or may not have told dad that if he tries one more time to put a hand on Blaine that he'd never see him again." Blaine's eyes widened and his mouth fell open. A proud smile spread across Kurt's face. Cooper brought a hand to the back of his neck and rubbed idly. "Yeah...he didn't like that very much."
Blaine quickly rolled out of bed and closed the gap between himself and Cooper, throwing his arms around his brother and hugging tightly. "Cooper, you didn't have to do that."
"Yeah, well, he doesn't need to be putting his hands on you. He doesn't get to come in and try and play the concerned father now. He hasn't earned it," Cooper said, his voice quiet. He looked down at Blaine, lifting a hand to card through his younger brother's curls. "I love you, B, and I'm so proud of the man you've become."
Blaine pulled back to look into his brother's eyes, whispering, "I love you, too, Coop." His voice was thick with emotion.
Cooper hugged Blaine tighter for a second before pushing back, clearing his throat. "Alright. Enough of that. I'm going to go get food now."
Blaine smiled and patted his brother on the shoulder before stepping back and watching him leave. Cooper wiped his eyes quickly as he shut the door behind himself. Blaine turned back toward the bed and sat down next to Kurt, pulling him close and shifting further into his side, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. "I love you, Kurt," he murmured softly.
Kurt petted his hair, dropping a kiss to the top of his head. "I know, sweetheart. I love you, too."
After they'd finished their pizza, sitting locked away in Blaine's room, they decided to call it an early night, none of the three eager to make that godawful day go on any further than absolutely necessary.
Cooper picked up the pizza box from where it sat in between the three of them on Blaine's bed. "Kurt, mom and dad are going to be home all day tomorrow, so it'd probably be best if you stayed up here. I'll stay with you until Blaine gets home. You'll probably be busy packing to leave, but I'll keep you company. It's just one more day and then you'll be in New York City."
Cooper gave an easy smile that Kurt returned, the latter's smile looking almost genuine, before wishing them both goodnight and leaving the room. Kurt pushed Blaine down gently and curled up against his side, resting his head on the younger boy's chest.
"Kurt, if you don't want to go to New York I'm sure we can think of something else," Blaine offered, though he instantly regretted the words. There was really no other viable option. Kurt apparently understood that.
"No, I have to go. God, I always thought that, if the time ever came that I'd have the option of getting out of Ohio, I wouldn't look back, but now, even after everything, I kinda don't want to leave yet. Not without you."
He turned his head and pressed a kiss against Blaine's chest.
Suddenly, out of the blue, Blaine was reminded of something. "Oh, I just remembered, I made you something. It's nothing special, but I made it for you." He sat up and reached into his nightstand drawer, returning with something hidden in his hand. "Close you eyes," he insisted softly, a smile playing on his lips.
Kurt shifted until he was sitting, grinned and squeezed his eyes shut, his smile widening as he felt Blaine lift his left wrist, his fingers fluttering around it before patting the skin and instructing him to open his eyes.
He let his eyes flutter open and took in the handmade bracelet made of varying shades of blue string that Blaine had tied around his wrist. He felt tears welling up in his eyes but he pushed them down, his smile widening as he saw the proud grin on Blaine's face.
Kurt's voice was breathless when he spoke. "Blaine, it's beautiful!"
Blaine's face lit up at the praise. "I'm glad you like it. It was harder to make than everyone says it is, and I wasn't sure if--"
Kurt cut the rambling off with a kiss, holding Blaine's face in his hands and letting his thumb slide across the younger boy's jaw. "It's perfect and I love it. I love you."
"I love you, too," Blaine breathed, leaning forward to brush his lips against Kurt's. "I'm going to miss you so much, Kurt."
His voice wasn't sad or melancholy, just simply stating a fact.
Kurt smiled and brushed a stray curl from his forehead. "Let's not think about it right now, then. Just lay with me."
Blaine gave a small smile and let himself be pulled down. He shifted automatically into Kurt's side and rested his head on the older boy's chest, listening to the steady beating of Kurt's heart echoing in his ear. He let the warmth of Kurt's body and the comforting sound of his heartbeat drag him toward unconsciousness.
He felt Kurt's fingers come to scratch lightly at the back of his hair and he breathed out a contented sound. Kurt dropped a kiss to the top of his head. "Go to sleep, sweetheart. I love you."
Blaine heard himself mumble something, but even he couldn't quite make out what it was. He felt safe and warm beside Kurt, taken care of and loved, and he fell asleep quickly to the sound of Kurt humming softly in his ear.
He'd been uneasy all day. After a day like yesterday, he'd been hesitant to leave Kurt alone in the house at all, but Cooper had assured him that no harm would befall Kurt under his dutiful watch. Blaine had rolled his eyes and Kurt had giggled into his coffee cup.
Classes seemed to drag on forever. All Blaine wanted was to get home to Kurt, to have his mind set at ease that Kurt was in one piece and unharmed. By the time Warblers' practice rolled around, he half debated just making a bee line for his car and skipping it without an excuse. But he figured he owed it to his friends to at least give a reason for not being able to stay, even if he hadn't thought of a reason yet to tell them.
When he walked through the door to the practice room, Wes was sitting behind the table with his head in his hands looking entirely defeated and everyone else was chattering sadly amongst themselves.
“What's the matter?” Blaine asked, setting down his bag and walking over to Wes. He put a hand on his friend's shoulder and looked down to see a note in front of him. He recognized the handwriting and his stomach rolled as he picked it up. Wes spoke before he got a chance to read too far into the letter.
“Sebastian transferred schools. He left a note about how he regretted the decision, but ultimately it was for the best that he transferred. He said that he had irreconcilable differences with one of the members' family, but he wouldn't say which,” Wes' voice was dejected. “I really thought he was our ticket to Nationals.”
Blaine tried to force down a smile. Even though he was delighted that Cooper had scared Sebastian enough to make him flee, his friends were upset and Blaine hated to see that.
“I'm sorry, you guys,” he said genuinely. “I'm sure we'll win without him though. We've got this.”
The Warblers' slowly turned toward Blaine, their expressions lifting slightly.
David spoke from his spot on the table. “I move that we cancel today's practice for a strategy meeting.”
The motion was seconded and Blaine's smile grew. Today was apparently his lucky day. He tried to keep a somber expression as he filed out of the practice room, but he all but ran to his car, eager to get home to Kurt.
They had decided that they would go see Burt at the garage when Blaine got home from school. Blaine hadn't been happy about taking the risk, but Kurt had been excited about the prospect of seeing his father and visiting the shop he'd spent so much time at as a child.
Though neither boy was looking forward to the conversation that needed to be had with Burt about Kurt moving to New York with Cooper, it was easy to forget about sad things when Kurt looked so excited, his bright blue eyes sparkling.
Blaine made it home quickly, narrowly avoiding getting pulled over for speeding, and darted inside, waving a quick hello to his mother as he ran up the stairs.
To his intense relief, Kurt and Cooper were sitting on his bed playing cards. Kurt set the cards in his hand down and slid off the bed, crossing over to throw his arms around Blaine's neck and kiss him. “Hi, sweetheart, how was school?”
Blaine couldn't help but return Kurt's smile. “It was awesome, actually. Practice got canceled today though.”
Cooper looked up from where he was picking up their game. “Why?”
“Turns out we're going to be a Warbler short from now on,” Blaine remarked coyly. “Coop, I don't know what you said to Sebastian, but he transferred schools.” Blaine's voice was bright.
Cooper just shrugged. “We just had a little talk and we decided that it would be best for all parties involved if he didn't come within fifty yards of you or Kurt.” He tossed the closed up deck of cards onto the nightstand. “Now that you're home, I'm going to get in the shower.”
Cooper threw his legs over the side of the bed and strode out of the room, a self-satisfied smile on his face.
Kurt pressed a kiss to the side of Blaine's neck. “Ready to go?” He asked, his voice bright and hopeful.
Blaine smiled and took his hand, leading him out of the room.
The drive to Lima seemed shorter than usual, even with the time allotted to stop for Blaine to get them both coffee.
By the time they were pulling in the parking lot to the tire shop, Kurt could barely sit still. They'd parked around back so that they could just walk straight into Burt's office, trying to gather as little notice as possible.
It was warming up so the door was open to let the breeze in. Burt was sitting at his desk, tinkering with some sort of an engine part. Kurt jumped out of the car, looking around quickly to make sure no one would see, and ran inside. Blaine saw Burt jump in surprise before his face lit up and he crossed the room to pull Kurt in for a hug.
Blaine made it to the door as Kurt was sitting down in a padded chair in front of his father's desk. Blaine dropped down into the chair next to him and took his hand, unsure what to do with his own.
They'd been talking about nothing in particular for about half an hour, just catching up when Kurt took a deep breath.
“Dad,” he said, his voice growing serious and a little sad. “I've decided, well, Blaine and I have decided, that I'm going to be moving in with his brother in New York.”
Burt's face hardened as he processed the words, clearly unhappy with the idea of Kurt going away again but also obviously weighing that against the benefits.
“I'm going to go back to school and I'm going to be able to graduate and go to college,” Kurt added, genuine happiness in his tone.
The man eyed Blaine a little skeptically, still wary of the entire situation. “And you're okay with this?”
Blaine squeezed Kurt's hand and nodded “Yes, sir. It was my idea. As much as I hate being apart from Kurt, I know that this is what's best for him. My brother will take good care of him.”
Burt lifted his baseball hat and rubbed a hand across his forehead, thinking. “Well, Kurt, if you've thought about this, then I say go for it. I'm gonna miss ya though, buddy. I just got you back.”
Kurt gave his father a sympathetic smile, reaching across the desk to take his hand. “Dad, you're not losing me again. You can come visit me and we can go out and do things. Remember when I was ten and you promised that one day you'd take me to see a show on Broadway?”
Burt laughed. “I knew you'd hold me to that.”
A genuine smile crossed Kurt's face and a peal of laughter bubbled out of his throat.
They stayed for a little while after that, but when the sun started to set, Blaine mentioned that they should probably get going. He kissed Kurt on the top of the head and waited outside as he said his goodbyes to his father.
When Kurt came outside, Blaine opened the door for him, patting his arm as he got in the car. Blaine climbed in the driver's side and heard Kurt sniffle once before wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.
“Are you alright, sweetheart?” Blaine's voice was soft. He reached across the console to take Kurt's hand and press a kiss to the back of it. Kurt nodded and put his other hand on top of Blaine's.
“Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just going to miss my dad,” he said sadly, his thumb sliding across Blaine's knuckles. “I guess it didn't hit me until now that I'm really going to be leaving.”
Blaine nodded sympathetically and squeezed Kurt's hand.
“Can we go home now?” Kurt asked, his voice thoughtful. What he was thoughtful about, Blaine wasn't entirely sure.
“Sure,” he said easily, taking one hand off of Kurt's and starting the engine.
The car ride home was strangely silent aside from the sound of Blaine singing quietly along with the radio. Kurt watched the scenery out the window, his fingers toying idly with Blaine's across the console.
At one point, Blaine had felt eyes on him so he turned toward to see why. Kurt had a small, adoring smile on his face that made warmth shoot down to Blaine's toes. He laughed out a quiet sound.
“You're staring,” Blaine noted matter-of-factly.
Kurt's smile widened, his tone mimicking Blaine's. “You're beautiful.”
There was a change in the air. Blaine could feel it, but he couldn't quite put his finger on what it was. Something about the look of determination in Kurt's eyes, the sureness, made his knees weak even though he was sitting.
Once they made it in the door, Blaine called out for his brother.
“He's not here,” Kurt said by way of an answer. He was standing next to the coffee table, holding a note in his hand. He held it up to show Blaine. “He went out with Amy. He says not to wait up.” Kurt wrinkled his nose. “She's not good enough for him,” he added, mostly to himself before setting the note down.
Blaine made a questioning noise, but Kurt dismissed it with a wave and followed Blaine toward the kitchen. Kurt dropped down into a chair and watched the other boy flit around the kitchen, making tea for them both.
He turned when his phone chimed from the counter. He screwed up his face in confusion, patting his pockets. “I thought I brought my phone with me when we left. I must have left it by accident,” he said, reaching out to pick it up. He held the phone to his ear with his shoulder as he listened to his voicemail while he finished making tea.
He set the phone down, still stirring in the sugar for Kurt's tea. “Mom and dad are going to be staying over in Columbus tonight. That party they went to ran late and they don't want to drive home in the middle of the night. Looks like it's just going to be us tonight.”
Suddenly, he felt Kurt's lips pressing against his neck, arms winding around his waist. He smiled and turned around in the embrace so that he could kiss Kurt properly. He let himself be crowded against the counter and kissed for a few minutes, his arms wrapped around the back of Kurt's neck, before breaking away with a quiet laugh. “Our tea's getting cold, honey. We've got all night.”
Kurt smiled and took the cups from the counter, carrying them to the table and beckoning Blaine to follow. He set the cups down and took Blaine's hand. Something about the atmosphere of the room felt strange.
“Kurt what's the matter?” Blaine asked, concerned.
“Nothing's the matter, Blaine. I just--” He broke off, taking a deep breath, steadying himself for whatever it was he was going to say. “You know how we're always careful not to push too far, to take things really slowly?” Blaine nodded, feeling more confused than ever. “Well, tonight, do you think we could....not?”
Blaine's eyes widened as he processed the words. His mind was brewing up a million questions, but the only thing he could manage was, “What?”
Kurt pulled in a deep breath and took Blaine's hands. “I love you more than I've ever loved anyone in my life, and the thought of leaving hurts so much. I just don't want to go to New York without showing you how much I love you.”
He watched as Blaine dumbly processed the words. “O—Okay,” he whispered, the words sinking in.
Kurt wanted this. Wanted him. The thought sent sparks shooting down Blaine's spine.
The tea was ignored, left to go cold on the table, as Kurt leaned over and kissed Blaine, lips sliding, slow and building across Blaine's.
Kurt broke away, but he didn't go far. He leaned forward to rest his forehead against Blaine's. “I love you so much.” The words were nothing more than a reverent whisper.
“Mmm, love you, too,” Blaine hummed contentedly.
Kurt lifted his hands to frame Blaine's face before kissing him again, chaste compared to the others. “I'm going to go take a quick shower,” Kurt said, his voice low and soft.
Blaine's eyes fluttered closed as he felt Kurt's thumb sliding across the apple of his cheek. “'kay,” he murmured. Kurt kissed him once more, sweetly on the lips and stood up to leave.
As soon as he heard the sound of Kurt puttering around upstairs, Blaine stood up and took the teacups to the sink, pouring out their untouched contents, his mind miles away, in thought.
He knew that this wouldn't be Kurt's first time, not really. The thought made his stomach churn sickly, so he quickly pushed it aside.
But that's why everything had to be perfect. He wanted this to be the first time it's ever mattered, the first time it's ever meant anything. Because he needed it to mean something. He wanted to give himself to Kurt completely, but more than anything, he wanted to show Kurt just how much he's cherished.
He quickly formulated a plan and set to work, and by the time he heard the shower turn off upstairs, he had everything ready.
--
He dropped down on the couch, tapping his foot nervously on the floor. He waited for what felt like an eternity until he finally heard Kurt's voice from the top of the stairs.
"Blaine?" Kurt called, his voice tentative and seeking.
Blaine smiled and called back, "Downstairs, Kurt."
He heard Kurt's socked feet padding against the floor as he made his way out down the stairs.
Kurt's eyes widened comically as he walked through the door to the living room, clad only in a pair of flannel pajama bottoms. Blaine could see his eyes taking in the image of the dimly lit room. The coffee table had been pushed aside in order to make more room.
The extra space provided by shifting furniture was now occupied by a homemade tent made out of bedsheets and blankets draped over chairs. The makeshift tent door was open revealing a cozy space lit up by the small, battery-powered camping lantern that Blaine had dug through the garage to find. A sleeping bag was spread out over the floor of the tent and there were throw pillows and the blanket from the back of the couch lying on top of it.
Kurt's hand was covering his mouth and his eyes were brimming with tears. Blaine gave an anxious smile, rubbing his hand across the back of his neck. "I know it's not much, but I can't really afford to get a hotel or anything and--" he broke off. He didn't want to say And you wouldn't be allowed into a fancy restaurant. He took a deep breath and continued, his words coming out a little fast from nerves. "I just—I want this to be special for you, Kurt."
Kurt crossed the room quickly and wrapped his arms around the back of Blaine's neck, kissing him sweetly. "It's perfect, Blaine."
Blaine breathed an audible sigh of relief and he took Kurt's hand. "C'mon," he said excitedly, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet as he led the other boy toward the tent. "Lemme show you what I did."
The taller boy laughed quietly and let himself be dragged toward the tiny door, falling to his knees and shuffling inside after Blaine. It was warm and comfortable inside the tent, only dimly lit by the lantern. Blaine sat, cross-legged on the blanket, watching Kurt with an adoring expression. Kurt's smile brightened his entire face as he settled down across from Blaine.
Blaine had been so busy watching Kurt that he'd almost forgotten. "Oh. I got this, too," he said cheerfully, holding up a container of strawberries and a tall bottle and two wine glasses.
"You got us wine?" Kurt asked, his eyes widening.
Blaine laughed brightly. "I wish. No, it's sparkling grape juice, sorry."
Kurt smiled and leaned across the small gap to press his lips against Blaine's lovingly, letting his thumb trace the apple of the younger boy's cheek. "I love it. You have no idea," he whispered reverently.
Blaine's face lit up in a smile and Kurt leaned across the small space to kiss him.
They took turns giggling and feeding each other strawberries, enjoying their time to just be until Kurt smiled gently and took the empty glass from Blaine's hand and set it aside, leaning forward again to kiss him.
He let Kurt's hands slip the shirt over his shoulders and come to rest on the button of his jeans. “Can—Can we take these off?”
It was a real question. It seemed as though Kurt honestly wanted an answer and would be content if that answer was 'no'. But Blaine had no mind to refuse. He lifted his hips and let Kurt pull off his jeans and underwear in one fluid motion, tossing them aside, before sliding off his own pajama bottoms.
Kurt's skin seemed to almost glow in the dim light of the tent and Blaine was momentarily breathless from the sheer beauty of it all. He'd seen Kurt naked before, but this was different somehow and so so much more.
He felt a little self-conscious as Kurt's eyes raked over his body. He fought the desire to try and cover himself somehow until Kurt spoke, leaning forward again to slide a hand along Blaine's arm comfortingly. “You're so beautiful, Blaine. I don't think you have any idea.”
With that, a warm smile spread across Blaine's face and he kissed Kurt lovingly, pulling him forward and guiding Kurt to lie on top of him.
Kurt tangled his fingers in the back of Blaine's curls, letting his tongue slide across the seam of the younger boy's lips. Blaine whimpered out a soft sound and Kurt took the opportunity to slide his tongue inside the warm cavern of his mouth. Kurt's hands slid down Blaine's body to map out the planes of his chest. He pulled back to whisper, “So beautiful, Blaine.” against his boyfriend’s lips as his hands dipped down further, sliding gently across the other boy's stomach, brushing against the head of his cock.
Blaine's hips lifted off the floor, unconsciously seeking Kurt's hand. Kurt deepened the kiss, sliding his knuckles along Blaine's length teasingly for a moment before wrapping his long fingers around Blaine's cock and giving a few lazy strokes. Blaine whined against Kurt's lips, pushing forward forcefully and wrapping his arms around the other boy's neck, coaxing him to lie down. He batted Kurt's hand away and kissed him once, chastely.
He rolled them both until he was slotted between Kurt's legs and kissed down the column of his neck, sucking lightly at where he could feel his pulse fluttering, pressing a kiss to skin and moving to mouth along Kurt's jaw.
Kurt's hips arched slightly and he made a soft sound in the back of his throat. “Come here,” he breathed, lifting Blaine's chin and kissing his lips.
One of Blaine's hands lifted to cup Kurt's cheek while the other slid down Kurt's front, palm exploring his chest. Blaine pressed a kiss to his boyfriend’s lips before kissing his way down Kurt's neck, chest, and stomach, pausing to drop fleeting kisses to his skin.
He dropped a kiss to Kurt's navel, eliciting a soft gasp. He let his hands slide across Kurt's sides as he kissed over Kurt's hipbones, pausing to suck hard enough to leave a mark. Kurt's breath was becoming a bit ragged. “B-Blaine, please...” The words trailed off, the thought incomplete but the meaning clear. Blaine kissed over Kurt's belly a little longer before letting his lips trail to where Kurt's cock rested, flushed and hard, against his stomach.
He stopped to take in the image of Kurt, lying naked and completely beautiful. His eyes had fluttered closed but his hand had come to rest on top of Blaine's on his hip, loosely twining their fingers together. Blaine dropped a kiss to the back of Kurt's hand, causing a small smile to quirk up the corners of his mouth. He mumbled a quick, “Love you” into Kurt's skin before wrapping his hand around Kurt's cock.
Kurt whined quietly and arched into his hand, Blaine's name coming out in a soft breath as the younger boy started moving his hand, slowly stroking Kurt while dropping hot kisses to his stomach and hips before using his hand to guide Kurt's cock to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to the heated skin and sucking gently before wrapping his lips around the head and sinking down.
A desperate sound bubbled out of Kurt's throat and Blaine could feel his body very nearly shaking with restraint. He slid his thumb across Kurt's knuckles before pulling out from underneath Kurt's hand. He moved his arm to rest over Kurt's belly, pressing down with just enough force that Kurt wouldn't need to restrain himself anymore. He heard the other boy breathe a sigh of relief, his hand coming to rest on the back of Blaine's head, tangling his fingers into his curls.
Blaine breathed in through his nose as he sank down further on Kurt's cock, feeling it bump into the back of his throat. Kurt keened and he felt him struggle beneath his arm, wanting to bury himself deeper. Blaine pulled off before sinking back down, hollowing out his cheeks. He massaged the sensitive ridge of Kurt's cock with the flat of his tongue, loving the way it made the other boy's fingers tighten in his hair.
“B-Blaine, s-stop,” Kurt stuttered, weakly pushing his head away.
Blaine wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and kissed Kurt's thigh. “What's the matter, Kurt? Was it not good?”
Kurt laughed out a breathless sound. “No, it was good. Too good.”
“Oh.” Blaine grinned widely, trying not to seem too proud.
Kurt giggled and took the opportunity to pull Blaine up and roll him to his back, positioning himself above him. He smiled softly and brushed a stray curl from Blaine's forehead. “I love you so much, Blaine.” He brushed their lips together, a soft smile on his face. “So perfect.” Another kiss. “So beautiful.”
“K-Kurt,” Blaine whimpered as Kurt's hands started exploring his chest again. “I want you. Please.”
Kurt looked up, his hands still roaming across Blaine's chest. “You're sure?” He asked softly, bringing his lips to Blaine's again as though he couldn't keep away.
Blaine swallowed and nodded. He'd never felt more sure about anything, even if he felt more vulnerable than he'd ever felt in his life. Kurt must have sensed it, because his face suddenly turned serious, his touches turning soft and gentle.
“Blaine, sweetheart, this is a big step and I just want you to be sure. I just want you to know that I'll never hurt you or force you to do anything you aren't comfortable with,” Kurt said, his words slow and deliberate.
Blaine leaned up and connected their lips, kissing him desperately. It still amazed him that he could manage to fall further in love with Kurt every single day. He wrapped his arms around the back of Kurt's neck, pulling him closer.
“Kurt, I love you, and I'm one hundred perfect sure that I want this. I want you. God, I wish I could go back and take away all the bad things that have happened to you, but I can't. All I can do is tell you how amazing you are. How loved and cherished you are,” Blaine whispered, his voice was thick with emotion and he could see the wetness shining in Kurt's eyes even in the dim light from the lantern.
Blaine's name fell from Kurt's lips on a breath and he leaned down and connected their lips. This kiss was new, a kiss that promised more. It made Blaine's heart race and he kissed back with all he had. After a few intense moments, Kurt broke away, breathless. “We—We don't have anything...”
Reaching behind him, Blaine lifted the corner of the blanket they were lying on and pulled out a small bottle of lube, a sheepish smile on his face. “I—I swiped it from Cooper's room earlier while you were in the shower.”
Kurt laughed and kissed Blaine with a loud smack, taking the bottle from where it rested next to Blaine's thigh and thumbing open the cap. Kurt pet his cheek with his free hand gently, comfortingly as his other hand slid between his legs.
Blaine's breath hitched as he felt Kurt's finger gliding across his opening, his own fingers digging into Kurt's shoulder. Kurt kissed him lightly on the lips, still giving soft touches to his face as he kissed him. “Have you ever done this before? To yourself I mean?” Kurt asked, his voice soft. Blaine shook his head, swallowing thickly.
“I-Is that okay?” Blaine asked, suddenly feeling a little self-conscious.
“Oh, yeah, sweetheart, it's okay. I was just wondering.” Kurt kissed him softly and he felt Kurt's finger stop skating across his opening and start to be a gentle pressure. “Just breathe normally through your nose, honey.”
Kurt brought their lips together, kissing Blaine as a distraction, as his finger pushed inside him, crooking and stretching. Kurt dropped his free hand to slide across Blaine's stomach, still kissing him and watching his face for any signs of discomfort. It wasn't uncomfortable. It pretty much just felt like a finger, odd but not painful. “Can you take another?” Kurt asked finally. Blaine nodded and Kurt kissed him again, slow and building as he traced another finger along Blaine's hole before sliding it in beside the first.
Blaine's eyes screwed shut for a moment at the new intrusion. He could feel the second finger sliding into him, could feel himself stretching to accommodate it. It was new and, once the slight burning subsided, he rocked down against the fingers out of instinct, trying to draw them in deeper, a soft whine bubbling up in his throat.
Kurt's fingers pushed in further, twisting and crooking maddeningly, causing Blaine's breath to hitch in his throat before speeding up. Kurt deepened the kiss, his free hand coming to rest on Blaine's cock, wrapping his fingers around it and stroking in time with the thrust of his fingers until Blaine was whining. Kurt crooked his fingers and brushed along something that made Blaine's breath punch out and white hot sparks fly up his spine.
His back arched and he heard himself babbling against Kurt's lips. Whatever he was babbling, he apparently made the request clear enough, because Kurt repeated the motion. Blaine's hips bucked off the floor, a loud moan slipping past his lips to vibrate against Kurt's.
Kurt took advantage of Blaine's distraction to pour a little more lube on his fingers and work a third finger inside of him. Blaine whined and rocked down against the fingers and Kurt sat up, kneeling between Blaine's legs, watching his fingers disappear inside the younger boy's body. He leaned down to drop sweet kisses to Blaine's trembling thighs, his face struck with reverence as he looked down at Blaine, laid out bare and trusting. “You're so amazing, Blaine. You have no idea.”
Blaine whined and pushed back against Kurt's hand again, wondering if he looked just as utterly wrecked as he felt. He decided quickly that it didn't matter; he trusted Kurt and suddenly realized that he was completely at ease with letting the older boy see him like this. He knew that Kurt wouldn't hurt him or do anything to make him regret the trust; Kurt would take care of him, make sure he was alright. The thought was enough to make warmth spread through him, make the already quickened pace of his heartbeat flutter just a little more.
In the dim light of the tent, Blaine could still see Kurt's lust-blown eyes, tiny rings of brilliant blue just barely visible around black. His hair was hopelessly ruffled and his porcelain-pale skin was flushed a delicate pink. Blaine couldn't ever remember seeing anything so beautiful.
“P-Please, Kurt...I need you.” The words came out around a breathy moan as Kurt's fingers brushed that spot again.
Kurt leaned down and kissed Blaine's stomach, sliding one hand soothingly across the skin while still working the other hand slowly in and out of him, whispering a soft “Okay” as he slid his hand free and stretched out over Blaine.
Blaine quickly tangled his arms around the back of his boyfriend's neck and pulled him down for a kiss, letting his mouth go slack and allowing Kurt to take control of the kiss. He kissed him, slow and building, for a moment before pulling back, stroking his thumb across the apple of Blaine's cheek.
“I want you to tell me if I hurt you, okay?” He said, his voice rough but soft. Honest concern saturated the words. Blaine nodded and Kurt ducked down to kiss him almost chastely on the lips. “I love you,” he whispered, kissing him again.
Blaine lifted his hand to brush away a stray lock of hair from where it was stuck to Kurt's forehead. “I love you, too.” There was a soft smile on his face that Kurt returned, ducking down again to connect their lips as Blaine felt a blunt, insistent pressure against his opening before Kurt slowly, agonizingly slowly, started to push in.
Fighting the urge to cry out, Blaine bit his lip instead, doing his best not to show that it hurt.
“Breathe, sweetheart,” Kurt murmured, stroking Blaine's cheek lightly.
He knew that this was a part of it, but it seemed like a small sacrifice in exchange for being intimate with Kurt. And it was. Kurt was looking down, watching himself sink inside Blaine's body as he worked Blaine's cock slowly with one hand. Clearly another distraction. Blaine could feel Kurt's thighs trembling with restraint, trying not to push in too much all at once. Blaine focused on Kurt's face as he felt him push in the rest of the way before stopping and holding statue still.
Kurt's eyes had fluttered closed and his kiss-reddened lips were slightly parted, blush blooming high on his cheekbones from the heat of the small tent and exertion. Stunningly beautiful.
“How do you feel?” Kurt's concerned voice was thready and low, and his head ducked to press hot kisses along Blaine's jaw, nuzzling his nose along the barely-there stubble.
The burning was wearing off and he could focus in on the feeling of Kurt inside him, filling him. The feeling of fullness was overwhelming. The only thought his brain could process was Kurt isinside me. He could feel the stretch and the pressure, could feel the way his body was begging for more, begging for Kurt to move. His body was wound tight, needing Kurt's touch. Everywhere Kurt's fingers would brush felt like it had sparks radiating from it.
The way his body craved Kurt's, his touch, his lips, his everything, was perfect. It made Blaine feel safe and cared for in a way he never had before. He finally understand what it meant to truly trust someone, to lay yourself bare to them and surrender yourself to their hands, knowing that they'll love you and care for you. He understood what it meant to make love to someone. Because there was no other name for what they were doing.
“It feels so perfect, Kurt,” Blaine breathed, leaning up to connect their lips, his fingers threaded into the back of Kurt's hair. “Can you move?” He whispered, his voice rough and desperate.
Kurt rested his forehead against Blaine's and pulled out slowly, the drag was enough to make Blaine's eyes slide closed before Kurt rolled his hips and buried himself inside Blaine.
Blaine felt his fingers unconsciously tighten in Kurt's hair as his head fell back against the pillow. “Oh, god, Kurt...”
The whispered words hung heavily in the air. Blaine wrapped his legs around Kurt's waist, his ankles knocking as Kurt began to thrust shallowly. Kurt brought his lips to Blaine's, kissing him deeply and swallowing Blaine's moans as his cock brushed against his prostate with each thrust.
Kurt put his hands on Blaine's hips and began rolling his hips faster, causing Blaine to choke on a moan, his hands scrambling up to grip Kurt's bicep tightly. He stretched up to press hot, wet kisses to the side of Kurt's neck, sucking roughly around his collarbone, eliciting a drawn out moan from the other boy.
Heat was pooling low in Blaine's belly and all he could heartastetouchsmell was Kurt. It was almost overwhelming.
Kurt shifted and ducked down to kiss Blaine, whining against his lips, “I'm so close, Blaine. Love you so much...”
Blaine whimpered as Kurt flicked his tongue across his lips before dipping inside his mouth, seeking and tasting.
“K-Kurt, touch me...please...” Blaine moaned out on a breath.
Kurt reached between them and took Blaine's aching cock into his hand, stroking quickly. It wasn't long until Blaine felt himself being driven toward the edge, Kurt's name falling from his lips like a prayer.
“You're so beautiful like this, Blaine,” Kurt whined, his voice wrecked, kissing him again, loving and desperate. “Oh God....Blaine—I'm going to come...” Kurt surged forward, his hips stuttering out an erratic rhythm before stilling.
Kurt's hand kept up its pace working over Blaine's cock and Blaine felt the pulsing twitch of Kurt spilling out his release inside him and it was enough to drive him over, he came hard, panting out choked whines as his orgasm crashed over him in never ending waves. Kurt alternated between peppering kisses on and around his lips and just panting against his skin as he came down from his own high.
Blaine lifted a boneless arm to twine his fingers into the back of Kurt's hair, feeling sated, loved, and the most perfect kind of tired. Kurt's eyes were glistening as though he was holding back tears, but the soft smile on his face was enough to make warmth spread through Blaine's body.
“I love you so much, Kurt,” Blaine mumbled sleepily.
Kurt rolled to the side and pulled Blaine tightly into his arms. Blaine happily curled into his side, resting his head on Kurt's chest and throwing an arm over his middle as Kurt pulled a blanket over them.
He dropped a kiss to the top of Blaine's damp curls, “I love you, too.”
The warmth of the tent and the sound of Kurt's still quickened heartbeat lulled Blaine toward sleep, and by the time Kurt's heartbeat slowed to its normal rhythm, they were both asleep, comfortable, safe, and loved in the presence of the other.