Kurt slammed his bedroom door shut as he pressed his back against his door. His eyes closed as the pain he was feeling began to fall down his cheeks, dripping onto his designer dress shirt. He tugged angrily at his bow tie and threw it to the floor as he slid down until he was sitting on the floor. He curled his knees up to his chest as he let out the tears. Why did he get so upset over this? The last time he was this upset, his mother had died. And that was how many years ago. After that, he had shed a tear here and there, but never a broke down like this.

He couldn't breathe. He felt like he was suffocating as he unbuttoned his vest with shaky hands and shrugged out of it. He was breathing erratically as he shook his head, his hands now scraping through his perfect hair, ruining its shape. He was just there to give the 'thank you' gift to Blaine...not as anything else. He should have ignored what he heard and waited for Rachel to leave before he gave Blaine the flowers. Now twenty dollars was wasted, rotting in a trash can in the parking lot of Lima Bean. He was saving that twenty for saving up for the new Gucci tie he wanted to get badly. Now he had to find a way to save up that lost twenty dollars again.

He looked over at Pavarotti and sighed. His faint chirps seemed to have sent tiny waves of relaxation towards Kurt, stopping the tears little-by-little. He rolled his eyes as he forced himself to his feet and walked over to Pavarotti, opening his cage so he could hop onto his index finger. He sat down on the edge of his bed and looked at Pavarotti closely. He loved this little bird.

He had pets before. He had fish, bunnies, and some more fish, but they either ran away or died (of course, you could probably guess which of the ones had died or ran away). But Pavarotti was his first success as in the terms of keeping a pet. Pavarotti seemed to love Kurt too. He brushed his free hand across the canary’s feathers, making her chirp happily.

“Why do I feel this way?” Kurt whispered aloud in a small and shaky, cracking voice.

* * * * *

Blaine had come home an hour ago from Lima Bean. He skipped going to the football game being that as soon as he came home, he plopped down on his bed and stared up at his ceiling. He had been staring at the same crack in the ceiling for over an hour now. All he could think about was all that has happened so far this school year...let alone Kurt.

Why did he get so defensive about what Rachel had said about him loving Kurt? He knew that was entirely impossible...though now that he thought about it, he did have some strong, and rather forbidden, feelings for Kurt.

When he saved Kurt from Karofsky that first day, he was so startled by Kurt alone. He was perceived as so beautiful and elegant, let alone strong and capable of fighting Karofsky back if he wanted to. He was so passionate about his feelings. And when Kurt walked into the Choir room that same day, he felt so happy and excited that Kurt would be in the Glee Club. It got even more better when Kurt tried out, showing Blaine just how strong and amazing his voice really was. He knew right away that he would be giving some sort of solo to Kurt for Sectionals.

Although he was impressed with how talented Rachel was without the other Glee members singing in the background, Kurt was better. Just...so much better. There was no comparison to Rachel's voice. So therefore, when he got the notice about the change in requirements for the Sectionals, he immediately knew who he was going to give the solos to. Rachel, after seeing her do every single solo for Glee so far, should only deserve at least one solo, in Blaine's opinion. Kurt really deserved a chance at some solos and he really deserved all of them for all Blaine could care. He thought Rachel was the one stealing everyone's spotlight and chance to really get out there and shine before they all graduate.

Blaine planned to give everyone an equal chance to shine if they did get to Regionals. It would be the perfect thing to do. He sighed and finally sat up, realizing what time it was and just how much his stomach was rumbling with hunger. He got to his feet and walked out of his room, down the hall, and to his kitchen where he took out some leftover pizza and a can of Monster energy drink. Assault, his favorite flavor.

He ate in silence, his mind unable to stop thinking about Kurt. Obviously enough, he knew well enough that just in these few, short weeks, he was falling head-over-heels for Kurt.

* * * * *

Blaine had finally picked up the choices of songs for Kurt's set of solos over the weekend with the help of Rachel. They met at Lima Bean each day around the afternoon, discussing what song would be perfect for Kurt's opening solo. So finally, they came up with a list of three songs for Kurt to choose from. So now, Kurt stood with Blaine on the auditorium stage for their private practice to go over Kurt's part. The rest of the Glee would be going over the acapella parts once the song had been chosen.

1.) Love Me Dead by Ludo
2.) If This Was a Movie by Taylor Swift
3.) Mayday by The Icarus Account

Kurt looked down at the list. “This is such a hard decision,” he murmured in a conflicted voice.

Blaine chuckled and took the list to reread it over. “Why don't we try out each song? Maybe it'll help?” suggested Blaine, who was leaning his body on the piano as the piano guy (who everyone now found his name to be Brad) sat, waiting to start.

Kurt shrugged, pursing his lips. “No...I think I want to try out Mayday first,” Kurt said, suddenly feeling as if it was the perfect song to fit his mood at the moment.

And you know what they sometimes say. Singing out was the best way to go when you're feeling like this, like how Kurt was feeling – pathetic and a person with an overactive imagination to think Blaine could ever feel the same way.

Blaine thought for a moment. He then motioned for Brad to start with Mayday. Kurt closed his eyes and sucked in a breath.

Mayday, mayday.
Someone save me.
I am fragile.
Oh, somebody rescue me.
Oh, somebody tell me you will.
Concrete heartache,
left me awake.
Sleepless sleeper.
Oh, somebody wake me up.
Oh, somebody tell me you will.

When Kurt had finished the song, Kurt felt his eyes moisten up. He let out a shaky sigh and easily pushed the tears back. He looked up at Blaine, searching for his expression to see Blaine's mouth dropped open, his eyes moistened as well.

Blaine ran his hand over his mouth and let out a sigh. “That was...that was beautiful,” whispered Blaine.

Kurt just stared at him, hesitating before he forced his lips to curve up into a fake smile. He nodded his head, folding his hands before him. “Thank you,” he said.

Blaine then slightly pushed his eyebrows together. “Why weren't you at Lima Bean Friday? You said you go there after school every Friday,” he said, recalling what Kurt had said the Friday before the last. He then felt stupid for asking. “Plus...you've been unusually quiet today,” Blaine then pointed out.

Kurt kept his forced-smile on and shrugged his shoulders. “I was hit with a lot of homework,” Kurt lied.

Brad looked between the two for a moment before he collected the music sheets and got up, leaving the two alone.

Blaine tilted his head slightly. “Homework you couldn't do over the weekend?” he questioned in a soft voice.

Kurt then shrugged. “I wasn't in the mood for coffee.” Shit! I shouldn't have said that. Now he'll know I was lying.

Blaine took a few steps closer to Kurt, his arms crossed over his chest as he eyed Kurt suspiciously. “If I was able to, I'd find out what's causing you to lie to me face,” said Blaine, a hint of hurt in his lowered voice.

Kurt felt shameful of what he had just allowed himself to do -- lie to this beautiful guy standing before him that, damn, he had a sudden urge to kiss him. He needed to get out of this situation. Like, right now. Fast, A.S.A.P. He let out a sigh as he turned his body away from facing Blaine, looking at the empty chairs of the auditorium before him. “Can we try out Love Me Dead now?” asked Kurt, obviously wanting to change the subject.

Blaine let out a puffed sigh and buried his hands in his pant pockets, biting his lip as he looked away, moving over to the piano to be in place of Brad that had left due to the change in the atmosphere. Blaine began the tune from what he recalled.

Love me cancerously,
like a salt sore soaked in the sea.
High maintenance means,
you're a gluttonous queen,
narcissistic and mean.
Kill me romantically.
Fill my soul with vomit,
then ask me for a piece of gum.
Bitter and dumb,
you're my sugar plum.
You're awful.
I love you!
She moves through moonbeams slowly.
She knows just how to hold me.
And when her edges soften,
her body is my coffin.
I know she drains me slowly.
She wears me down to bones in bed.
There must be a sign on my head,
that says oh!
Love me dead!