I’m not going to make it to my appointment tomorrow.

Sorry.

~~~~~

To: Blaine, From: Chad
Date: Thurs, May 14th, 3:42 pm
Subject: Re: Cancellation

What’s wrong?

And before you ask why I assume something’s wrong, you’ve never canceled. One time you showed up here with what I can only imagine was the bubonic plague, which I then contracted from you.

If something’s wrong Blaine, that’s when you *should* go to therapy.

~~~~~

To: Chad, From: Blaine
Date: Thurs, May 14th, 3:47 pm
Subject: Uncancellation

You’re right.

See you tomorrow.

~~~~~

To: Burt, From: Kurt
Date: Thurs, May 14th, 10:17 pm
Subject: Prepare to be disappointed in me.

Remember that time that I was all crappy and narcissistic and jerky? No, not that one time, the other time, when you were in Paris and I was complaining about Blaine.

Well, I kind of, sort of let that all build up and get way out of control and then I yelled at Blaine (on the phone) and told him that talking isn’t that hard and … then I told him I don’t want to talk until I get home.

Can you call me when you get this email? I don’t know what to do. I just need to talk to you.

Please don’t yell at me. I know I messed up. And if I can’t talk to Blaine (and I really can’t talk to Blaine right now. I don’t trust myself to not make things worse.) then I need to talk to you. Because I’m 99% sure you’re the only person in my life who won’t immediately take his side.

You’ll probably take his side when you hear exactly what happened (I’m even on his side), but still, at least you’ll listen to me first.

I love you, Dad.

~~~~~

To: Blaine, From: Matt
Date: Thurs, May 14th, 11:02 pm
Subject: What’s wrong?

I can’t help but notice that you refuse to speak and also that you keep sniffling.

And now you left the room without telling me anything and that’s weird. Where did you go? Why didn’t you invite me?

I’ve tried talking to you several times, to no avail, and then I tried im-ing you. I’m hoping that this email will work and that maybe you’ll tell me what’s wrong.

Did you fail an exam? Were people mean at work again? Is it something at home?

I feel like a complete woman saying this, but I thought you knew you could talk to me. But I guess whatever’s bugging you, you don’t want to “talk” about. You can write me an essay. You love writing essays.

Please let me know if I can help, ok?

~~~~~

May 15
@ 12:08 am
Matt: Have any of you guys seen Blaine?

12:10 am
Puck: No, Rachel and I are at a bar.
Puck: When the hell do you turn 21 so you can start coming out with us?

12:13 am
Tina: He’s here!
Tina: I found him pacing outside our apartment when I got home from my cousin’s
Tina: He’s not saying much.

12:15 am
Matt: Okay, I wanted to know where he was and he wasn’t answering texts.

12:17 am
Tina: he seems really upset.

12:20 am
Matt: do you want me to come over?

12:21 am
Tina: No, lemme see if I can get him talking.
Tina: Maybe *you* did something?

12:24 am
Matt: j’accuse!

12:25 am
Tina: you’re using that wrong.

12:28 am
Matt: I know. Still funny though
Matt: I don’t think I did anything wrong.
Matt: let me know if I can help.

1:35 am
Tina: You still up?

1:36 am
Matt: yup

1:37 am
Tina: he’s on his way home
Tina: he wouldn’t really talk to me though

1:39 am
Matt: So what have you been doing for the past hour?

1:41 am
Tina: We watched Jimmy Fallon and he seemed to need to cuddle a little.
Tina: and then when he was leaving he told me Kurt’s mad at him.
Tina: But he basically ran away before I could get more from him.

1:45 am
Matt: Hmm. Thanks for the heads up.

1:47 am
Tina: Hopefully he’ll tell you what’s going on.

~~~~~

To: Matt, From: Blaine
Date: Fri, May 15, 2:13 am
Subject: Re: What’s wrong?

I’ve decided to take the essay option, rather than the presentation option.

I’m sure you’re not surprised.

Kurt’s mad at me and currently not speaking to me, but we’re not broken up. He said he needs a little time and wants to spend his last two weeks in Paris not dealing with … something? I’m not sure if he’s trying not to deal with me, or with his emotions, or with communication? I don’t know, I didn’t quite understand his logic.

But he saw a video from the party last week, that happened to capture the 2.5 seconds that I was talking to Puck’s roommate and Kurt decided that must have been Justin hitting on me. So, he watched the video and then he called me and I called him back and then he freaked out and yelled at me. And I couldn’t talk or even explain myself because I hate the stupid fucking phone and he wasn’t listening to me. Everything I said just dug me deeper into a hole. Even though I said about 10 words total. They were all the wrong words. So, I hung up on him.

I wrote him an email, trying to explain myself and apologize for hanging up on him and he accepted everything I said. But then we were im-ing earlier and he said he doesn’t want to talk to me until he gets home. He was very clear on the fact that we’re not breaking up and that he still loves me or whatever.

It feels like we broke up. And I feel really terrible. But I want to respect what he asked me to do.

I can’t really talk about it. I’m way too emotional about the whole thing. I don’t really want to tell Kurt’s friends what happened. I kind of feel like it’s not my place. I’m sure he’ll talk to Rachel or something soon.

This essay doesn’t have a clear thesis statement or a conclusion. I apologize.

~~~~~

To: Puck, Rachel, Tina, Kerry, From: Matt
Date: Fri, May 15, 4:38 pm
Subject: code red

This is not a drill.

The fight/drama we’ve been waiting for all semester has actually erupted.

I’ve been waiting for Blaine to leave for his exam to send this email. I feel like he’s been watching me, silently, waiting for me to do something all day. It’s like he knew I wanted to get in contact with you guys. It was weird. I’m not sure why I didn’t just leave myself. It basically turned into a stand off. I swear he backed out of door giving me a suspicious look.

Anyway.

So he says they had a fight, that Kurt’s mad at him and doesn’t want to talk to him until he gets home. But Blaine doesn’t seem to really understand what he did wrong. Apparently Kurt called him and yelled at him and then they continued the fight via instant message.

I know we said we wouldn’t meddle, but I figured we should all be aware of what’s going on.

Also big ups to Tina for calming him down last night. When he got back here, he at least seemed less anxious.

He still wouldn’t talk, but he seemed less on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

~~~~~

To: Rachel, From: Julia
Date: Fri, May 15, 11:33 pm
Subject: You don’t know me. Don’t be frightened.

Hey, I’m Julia, Kurt’s friend in Paris? I stole your email out of his contacts. I’m not a crazy person, but I’m really concerned about Kurt.

He’s acting really weird and I’m about to spend a week with him at wine tastings and I was wondering if you might have any advice? Something to get him talking?

I’ve tried all the usual. Complimenting his ensemble, talking about my own issues (usually he loves to commiserate), blatantly asking him what’s wrong. He’s not giving me anything. I think it’s about Blaine but I’m not sure.

So, yeah, any help would be greatly appreciated. Or maybe you want to get in touch with him yourself? Maybe he needs someone from home?

~~~~~

To: Julia, From: Rachel
Date: Fri, May 15, 6:53pm
Subject: Re: You don’t know me. Don’t be frightened.

Hi! It’s nice to meet you. (via email.)

I think I am going to try to call him, but I’m also going to add you to an email chain we currently have going. Take a look at what Matt said originally. You were right, it is about Blaine.

We’ll figure it out. Not that it’s really any of our business, I suppose, but they’re really good together and we want to do what we can to make sure they don’t mess up a good thing. Also, losing Blaine would leave our group oddly lopsided because we probably wouldn’t talk to his roommate or his roommate’s girlfriend anymore and we really like them too.

Basically, I think we just want to try to keep them from having a breakdown during the next two weeks, so we’re going to need your help with the Kurt end of that plan. Obviously.

~~~~~

To: Matt, Puck, Tina, Kerry, Julia, From: Rachel
Date: Fri, May 15, 7:03 pm
Subject: Re: code red

I added Julia to the email chain. She says she knows something’s up with Kurt, but that he’s not saying anything.

Julia, I meant to ask, when do you guys leave for your wine tasting tour? (Jeez you guys are lucky. Someday Puckerman, you’re taking me to France for a wine tasting tour. You’ve been warned.)

So, do we intercede, mediate? Or wait for them to come to their senses?

~~~~~

To: all, From: Tina
Date: Fri, May 15, 7:52 pm
Subject: Re: code red

I think it’s good we all know what’s going on. I think we need a game plan, but I don’t think we should mediate. It sounds to me like they’re not breaking up, they’re just confused.

I think Rachel should try to call Kurt.

I think Matt should continue to be an awesome roommate.

Also, welcome Julia. Sometimes when Kurt’s feelings are hurt, he curls in on himself. He might not want to say anything at all about this and that’s ok. But maybe Rachel can get it out of him.

Do you have any ideas from your end Julia? Has Kurt said anything before this that you might think this is about? I think this seems sort of out of nowhere, considering the semester is almost over.

~~~~~

To: all, From: Puck
Date: Fri, May 15, 8:18 pm
Subject: Re: code red

I think we should all back the fuck off.

Does this mean we don’t have to help Matt and Blaine move this weekend?

(Fuck wine tasting. If we go to Europe it’s for Oktoberfest.)

sent from my iPhone.

~~~~~

To: Kurt, From: Burt
Date: May 15, 8:33 pm
Subject: How ya doing?

Been thinking about you pretty much since we got off the phone. I hope you’re feeling better than you were last night, bud.

Call me if you need me.

Love- Dad

~~~~~

To: all, From: Matt
Date: Fri, May 15, 8:37 pm
Subject: Re: code red

Dear Puck- you’re not getting out of it. Love, Matt.

I don’t think we need to mediate, I agree, but I do think we need to … “all hands on deck” this situation. So, yeah, Rachel should call Kurt. And I’ll make sure Blaine doesn’t lose his shit over the next two weeks.

And yes. I am an awesome roommate. Excellent point Tina.

~~~~~

To: all, From: Kerry
Date: Fri, May 15, 9:38 pm
Subject: Re: code red

Blaine just texted me. He wants me to meet him at the Chicken Crib.

I’ll keep you informed.

~~~~~

To: all, From: Kerry
Date: Fri, May 15, 11:02 pm
Subject: Re: code red

So I don’t necessarily feel comfortable telling you guys everything Blaine said, I don’t want to breach his trust or something. For two reasons, actually. One because I don’t think that’s cool in general to do to a friend, but also because I’m really happy that Blaine trusts me enough these days to talk to me period. I mean, this from the guy who didn’t speak to me directly, or while making eye contact, for the first 4 months that I knew him.

In any event, I think he’s ok. Not great, but he’s not freaking out to the extent I was expecting.

He’s sad. And I think he’s bummed because he can’t quite figure out what he did wrong. I don’t want to put words in Kurt’s mouth, but I think Blaine was being sort of... careless with what he told Kurt, and also how he told Kurt, about things while Kurt’s been away.

I think it seems like they’re both vaguely at fault, but kind of like this would never have happened if Kurt wasn’t away anyway. I don’t think they could have had a fight like this if they were in the same place. They may have had a different fight, but I think this one was a lot about feelings that don’t translate well via written mediums. And I know they’ve been skyping a lot and even talking on the phone sometimes, but I think Blaine was pretty unaware of how he was presenting himself to Kurt. And Kurt wasn’t being forthcoming with how upset he was about some of the stuff that Blaine was telling him.

Alright, enough psycho-analysis of these boys. I have a feeling they’ll pretty much make up the second they see each other. We just need to keep them afloat (in their respective seas of tears) until they’re reunited.

Two weeks guys. We can do it.

~~~~~

To: all, From: Matt
Date: Fri, May 15, 11:48 pm
Subject: Re: code red

I’m very jealous of Kerry’s blossoming friendship with Blaine. I thought that I should get my feelings out of the way before it becomes an issue within our relationship. We’re going to need to talk this out Kerry. Did he even mention me while you were together??? (I wish I wasn’t only half joking. I feel protective and sort of territorial about Blaine.)

In other news, I think we’ve got this covered. We’ll be busy all weekend moving anyway and then we’ll just find stuff for him to do over the next few weeks. And at least Kurt’s going away, so that should keep his mind off of this.

~~~~~

To: all, From: Julia
Date: Sat, May 16, 10:42 am
Subject: Re: code red

Wow. First of all, I wish I had friends like you guys. This has been a seriously awesome insight into why Kurt misses you all so much.

Second of all, hi I’m Julia. Can I be your friend?

Third of all, Kerry’s pretty much right on with her impression of the situation. I mean, I don’t know what Blaine’s thinking, but Kurt’s been feeling a little jealous this semester, I think of everyone that Blaine’s been hanging out with and talking to. I know he feels left out. I also don’t want to spill too much of what Kurt has said to me, but he did say at one point that he felt like Blaine was oblivious to his feelings. On the other hand, he also admitted to not necessarily making that clear to Blaine.

In any event, he and I are leaving Monday morning and we’ll be gone for 8 days. Then we’re coming back to Paris and staying in a (shitty) hotel here until our flights later in the week. Kurt leaves the day before I do. So, if Rachel gives him a call tonight or tomorrow, that would probably be perfect.

Also, I’m not actually joking about the second point above. How does one go about joining this group? My boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend while I’ve been away and I’m in the market for an entirely new social group. Let me know. I’d pay dues, or get references. Kurt seems to like me! (I’m not actually crazy. I swear.)