I'd seen Blaine drunk on only one occasion. The first Rachel Berry House Party Train Wreck Extravaganza. And in case you can't remember how that went down... Blaine spent half the time eating Rachel's face and the other half marveling about how incredibly tall Finn was. But I figured that if he did go out to drink, he'd be with good company, so he'd be perfectly fine.

I kind of forgot that it was Nick and Jeff we were talking about.

I started getting worried when I started to get some funnily worded texts from Blaine...

"Kart guess what I love young and jeff said hiiiiii..."

Well, first of, he spelled my name wrong. Which I didn't even get, because the U and the A key aren't even near each other. He added a random "ng" at the end of you... And it definitely wasn't the type of text I'd usually get from Blaine. I typed up a response with quickly, noting my perfect spelling and grammar.

"I should have known that making you go out with Nick and Jeff would be a bad idea. Looks like autocorrect and drunken typing has gotten the best of you."

I got a reply about five minutes later.

"Baby baby baby I live you. Come drank with us itll road so much"

I assumed that that text meant that Blaine loved me and he wanted me to join them in drinking. Now that was something that I definitely did not want to do.

"Uh, no thank you. Alcohol and me don't mix. If you recall the Pixy Stix incident... Even worse than that."

"Pweaseee?"

"No."

I tucked my phone away in my pocket before burying my face in my pillow. I was honestly exhausted. It had been the longest couple of weeks, and I just wanted to sleep, but now I was getting all of these cryptic texts from Blaine, and I couldn't help but be worried. Honestly, my sense of judgment can be rather warped sometimes.

I was kind of shocked when I heard my phone ring. At first I assumed it was Blaine drunk dialing me, but it wasn't his ringtone (Teenage Dream, what else?) that was playing. It was just my regular default ringtone (Defying Gravity, what else?). I picked up my phone and looked at the screen to see that it was Nick calling me. And that is when I knew something had gone wrong, because Blaine had told me that Nick was supposed to be the designated driver. I slid my thumb across the screen and pressed the phone to my ear.

"Hello, this is Kurt," I said softly, knowing that Dad and Carole were asleep just down the hall.

"Hey, Kurt?" Yes, this was definitely Nick's voice. Unfortunately, I did pick up on a certain tone in his voice. Worried, overwhelmed...

"Nick? What's up?"

"Hi, Kurt. Um... So Blaine... he... um..." Immediately my heart stopped. I knew this was a bad idea... well, actually, I didn't until after he left, but still...

"What's wrong with Blaine? Is he okay? Oh my gosh, is he hurt?" I couldn't withhold the tone of panic in my voice.

"No, no. Nothing like that." I sighed in relief. "He's just... well... can you please come help me with him? He and Jeff are pretty drunk and I can't handle both of them. They're starting to plan an elaborate three person flash mob... and I just can't..."

Oh. Right, it would make sense that they would both be really drunk. They were probably bugging the hell out of Nick. I sighed again, not exactly with relief this time, though.

"Where are you guys?"

"Scandals, in West Lima." I'd never been to Scandals, but I was well aware of its existence. It's the only gay bar in the Lima area. Of course, they were all too young to get in, but Nick and Jeff claim they "know people", so they have never had trouble getting in.

"Okay, I'll be right over. Hang in there."

"I'll try." Nick's voice sounded very relieved through the phone." Thank you so much, Kurt. You're a lifesaver."

I sighed softly and ended the phone call. I slid off of my bed and put on some boots. I never changed out of my clothes from that day, so I just put on a pair of boots and grabbed a sweater. My dad knew that Blaine was out with his friends, but I don't think he knew that alcohol was involved, so I tried to be as quiet as possible leaving the house, not wanting to face any questions that he might ask.

It took me about twenty minutes to get to Scandals. I was a bit worried about me getting into the place so I could find them, but as it turns out, it wasn't a problem, as the three boys were all in the lobby. Blaine and Jeff were dancing wildly to the general beat of the music inside the club. Nick looked like he was on the brink of insanity. Almost immediately, Blaine took notice of my presence, and he approached me with a grin on his face.

"Kurt! I knew you'd come. I knew you would." Blaine wrapped his arms around my neck, swaying to the music and planting messy kisses to my neck. I knew he was drunk, so I tried to push him off, with little success.

"Thanks so much for coming, Kurt," Nick said, trying to help pry Blaine off of me. "I'm seriously overwhelmed. I feel like Blaine and Jeff are pulling me in separate directions."

Speaking of Jeff, he probably noticed the absence of all his friend, because he skipped over to where we stood also, grabbing onto Nick's wrist and pulling him towards the entrance of the bar. "Nick! I love this song, come dance with me! Oh, Kurt's here! Hi, Kurt!"

"Hi Jeff..." I said, finally managing to get Blaine to back off. He started dancing again, wildly and kind of random. It was very much like the Rachel Berry House Party Train Wreck Extravaganza, except faster and with more jerky movements, so I guess he had more to drink. "So what's the problem?"

"I can't get either of them to leave. As soon as I'm able to ease one out of the door, I lose the other one. Jeff keeps drinking, too. Blaine stopped awhile ago, but he's still really drunk."

"Nick, come on!" Jeff whined loudly, pulling on Nick again. Nick gave me a "see what I mean?" look, and I returned it with an "I'm glad you called me" look. I felt an odd warmness on the back of my neck and it occurred to me that Blaine found my neck again. He whispered in my ear, and I could smell the trace of alcohol in his breath.

"Kurt! I can order you a... an... I don't know... What do tree nymphs drink? Tree nectar? Do they have those here?"

"Um, I don't think so, honey..." I managed, thoroughly confused. I started to grab Blaine's shoulders and lead him towards the exit. "We're actually going to go home now."

"No! I don't want to go home!" Blaine whined, much like a toddler, shaking away from my grasp. I looked to Nick desperately.

"You have to tell him there is a Katy Perry concert. That's the only way I could get him out of the door."

"Really? That's... that's..." I struggled for words. That was ridiculous, but oh so Blaine that it was almost funny. This would be a great story to tell in the morning.

"Just do it." Nick said, softly, and then returned to trying to get Jeff to stop dancing.

"Blaine, come on. We have to go so we won't be late to the Katy Perry concert." I said with a sigh. This was truly crazy.

"Katy Perry concert?" Blaine's eyes lit up and his face broke into an ear to ear grin. "Oh, Kurt, we have to go. I love Katy Perry. I'd be straight for Katy Perry. Well... maybe... okay, no. Maybe not, because of you and stuff. But if you didn't exist... Or maybe we could do a three way thing. Yeah. I'd like that."

"Okay, Blaine! We're leaving now!" I squeaked as his train of thought got more and more dirty.

"Because we don't want to be late for the concert! Ooh, Kurt! Maybe she'll sing Teenage Dream! That's kind of our song, you know? Because that's the song the Warblers and I sang when you spied on us. You were such an awful spy, you know that? You weren't even in your Dalton blazer. You were wearing that outfit... I'm sorry it got ruined Kurt. At the zoo... I knew that outfit was special for you because it reminded you of us. I always thought you looked beautiful in it. Even that first day when I met you, but I didn't say anything. I don't normally say what I'm thinking. But I think that you are perfect and that I love you every single day."

That was a lot to take in. Now, Blaine was drunk, and this had only happened twice at this point, so I didn't know exactly how much to take of this as true. I mean, obviously Blaine's drunken judgment wasn't the best (the whole eating Rachel's face thing), but... I didn't know how to react. All my blood went straight to my cheeks as I blushed madly.

"I... I love you too, Blaine." I whispered, opening the door to the backseat of my Navigator and letting Blaine crawl in. He immediately got himself comfortable. I closed the door behind him and slid into the driver's seat, turning on the car and beginning to drive home.

"I'm tired." Blaine mumbled.

"Then sleep, baby. I'll bring you home."