"I..I love you too, Blaine. You are..the best boyfriend. Ever. Make sure that...my dad doesn't freak, 'kay?" Kurt failed to hold back a deep yawn. "And Blaine? When I wake up, I wanna...can you be holding my hand? That way I know you're there, deal?"

"Of course, honey." Blaine bent down to press another gentle kiss to Kurt's temple, trying hard not to let his emotions overwhelm him lest he burst into tears in front of Kurt. "Just close your eyes, okay? I'll be right here when you wake up."

Kurt allowed his eyes to sink closed at last, and Blaine gave his beautiful boyfriend a lingering look before signaling to Dr. Molly that they were ready. With one last squeeze of Kurt's hand, he allowed the nurse to separate the two of them and to slowly push Kurt's gurney through the double doors and out of sight. Blaine stood there for several minutes after Kurt disappeared, fighting to gain control of his emotions as he prepared himself for the hardest part that was still to come. The waiting.

Blaine checked his watch for at least the fifth time in the past half hour, sighing deeply as he confirmed it was just after 3 am. Kurt had been brought into surgery around 11:30 pm and the surgeon had said the surgery would only take an hour or two. Blaine's stomach twisted in fear when he realized Kurt had been in surgery for double the amount of time the surgeon had predicted. He wanted to believe that the surgeon was just taking his time and being careful and thorough, but his mind was going to increasingly dark places, imagining all kinds of horrible complications. He watched Burt pace back and forth across the surgical waiting room, every bit as worked up as Blaine about Kurt's condition. 

Blaine looked up suddenly when he felt a hand on top of his. He turned in shock to see Carole give him a comforting smile. She gently took the shredded remains of an empty styrofoam cup that Blaine had been mindlessly tearing apart and patted him on the knee.

"Kurt's going to be fine, Blaine," she said softly. "No news is good news at this point, trust me."

Blaine nodded his head, desperately wanting what Carole was saying to be true. But he couldn't stop the creeping doubts. He blew out a shaky breath, trying hard to fight back the prickling of tears in his eyes as he remembered just how scared Kurt had been when he'd been forced to leave him hours earlier.

"What's taking so damn long?" Burt suddenly asked to no one in particular.

"I don't know, honey," Carole answered honestly. "There are lots of reasons a surgery could run long. Do you want me to see if I can find a nurse to update us?"

"Yes," spoke Blaine and Burt in near perfect union.

"Okay, I'll be right back," Carole answered. And just like that, she was gone, leaving Burt and Blaine alone for the first time since Burt had arrived at the hospital hours earlier.

Burt let out a sigh of frustration as he watched Carole disappear down the hall and resumed pacing the room, his hands balled up into fists that didn't quite hide the tremors. As Burt paced back and forth, back and forth, he was transported back nearly ten years to a night much like tonight.

FLASHBACK – MAY 29th, 2002 – LIMA MEMORIAL HOSPITAL

Burt paced back and forth along the yellowed tile floors of the family waiting room. It was nearly midnight and he hadn't been updated on his wife's condition since 6 pm that evening. His son was sprawled across the vinyl couch, covered with Burt's coat and using a stuffed penguin as a pillow. His face was open and innocent in sleep, but looking closer, it was easy to see the slight puffiness of his eyes and streaks across his cheeks from his earlier tears.

Lizzie was still in surgery. And not just any surgery, but her third surgery for ovarian cancer in the past two years. More importantly, this was the surgery that would tell them if her cancer had spread, if this surgery would mark the end of her second battle with cancer or the beginning. Elizabeth had been strong and stoic as always, smiling and laughing up until the minute that the nurses wheeled her away. She'd reminded Burt to eat something and not to overdo it on the coffee. She'd kissed Kurt on the forehead and assured him that she would be there to read him his favorite story tomorrow night. But Burt could see Lizzie biting the inside of her lip to keep it from trembling and he knew deep down that there was no way that she wasn't every bit as terrified as he was. But his Elizabeth, his beautiful, strong, and brave wife, would of course put on a brave face for her family. Burt's heart had ached for her in that moment, and he wanted nothing more than to shout, "Stop...this is all a big mistake. Not my family. Not again. Take me if you must, but please God, don't put her through this...don't put us through this again." But instead Burt had struggled to hold himself together for his wife and his son, and he'd put on a cheery face as he assured Lizzie that he would make sure that he and Kurt ate a decent dinner and that they'd see her soon. His last words to her had been, "I love you," and really, what more could he say than that?

But that had been hours earlier. The oncologist had estimated that the surgery could take 3 or 4 hours at the most, but it had been nearly 9 hours since Burt had last seen his wife. When the nurse updated him around 6 pm, she'd been vague and simply said that it had taken longer than expected to expose the tumor. She assured him that the oncologist was simply being careful and taking his time, wanting to save as much of the healthy tissue as possible. But Burt had his doubts as the look on her face told him that there was something that she wasn't telling him. Something that she couldn't tell him, perhaps?

When they met with the surgeon days earlier, Elizabeth had adamantly refused to have a full hysterectomy. Burt knew that being an only child herself, Elizabeth desperately wanted to give Kurt a younger brother or sister. Burt had always dreamed of having a big family as well, but not at the expense of his wife's health. This discussion had turned into a rare fight between them, with both of seeming unwilling to cede any ground. Things had gotten heated until a sleepy Kurt wandered into their bedroom clutching a blanket and complaining of a nightmare. Burt had softened almost immediately and allowed Kurt the rare treat of climbing into bed with them. Kurt snuggled up next to his mother and was out like a light in no time. Burt leaned over, kissed his wife goodnight, and assured her that he would be there to support her, no matter what her decision. And as he lay silently in the dark with his arms around his family, he began to pray for the first time in many, many years. Burt hadn't stopped praying since then. Praying for his wife. For his son. For his family.

Burt was suddenly startled by a sound behind him. He turned to see Kurt's body flailing on the couch, his hands closed into fists and his eyes still tightly closed. Kurt was having a nightmare. He'd been having a lot of those since Lizzie had been diagnosed with cancer. Burt knelt down next to the couch and began rubbing soothing circles across Kurt's back. Kurt let out a whimper that sounded an awful lot like "mommy" and shook his head back and forth.

"Shh, it's okay, buddy. Go back to the sleep. It's just a bad dream. I'm here, Kurt. You're okay." Burt whispered soothingly as he continued to rub his son's back.

Kurt's body stilled and his eyes opened slowly, blinking against the harsh flourescent lights. "Daddy?" he called, unsure where he was for a moment.

"Hey bud, I'm right here. Go back to sleep, okay? It's late," Burt spoke, hoping that Kurt would fall back asleep before he could remember why they were at the hospital and get worked up all over again.

"Where's mommy? She's supposed to read me my story," Kurt whimpered, feeling lost as he remembered where he was.

"She's still...the doctor's are still helping her, buddy. Just go to sleep and when you wake up, you can see her, okay?"

Kurt's lower lip began to tremble. It was cold in the hospital and he didn't have his "Finding Nemo" nightlight. And his mom always read to him before bed. She would make funny voices for all the characters and let Kurt turn the pages and look at the pictures for as long as he wanted. And while his dad would always say "Only one chapter, Kurt," he could usually talk his mom into reading him two chapters.

Kurt wasn't stupid. He knew his mom was sick again. Only sick people had to come to the hospital. But he didn't want her to be sick. He'd hated seeing her in the hospital with tubes everywhere and he'd been so sad when he watched her cry after all her pretty hair feel out. It wasn't fair. Couldn't someone else's mom be sick instead?

Tears started falling from Kurt's eyes again, silently this time. He reached for his dad, burying his face in his shoulder as he said, "I miss mommy. I don't want her to be sick again."

Burt had held his son tight, rubbing his back and letting him cry for a few minutes. "I know, Kurt. I know. I don't want her to be sick either." He slowly rose to his feet, gathering Kurt with him and settling them both on the couch, letting Kurt rest his head in his lap. "Just try to sleep, Kurt. When you wake up, it'll be morning and you'll be able to see mom, okay?" Kurt sniffled and nodded into his dad's lap and together they waited.

END FLASHBACK

Without thinking, Burt sunk onto the couch next to Blaine, trying hard to keep himself upright after the day and night he'd had. He made a conscious decision to keep his mind on the here and now. Just because Lizzie had... Just because things had gone so badly the last time he was here, that didn't mean that something bad was going to happen to Kurt as well. Kurt was having his appendix removed. That was nothing like having major surgery for a cancer relapse. And while the logical part of Burt knew this was true, it wasn't enough to stop him from worrying.

Blaine watched Kurt's dad out of the corner of his eye. He'd promised Kurt that he'd keep an eye on him, that he'd make sure he didn't get too worked up lest it affect his heart condition. He could see that Burt's hands were shaking almost as badly as Blaine's were at the moment. What Burt needed, what they both needed, was a distraction. Blaine's eyes scanned the room, looking for some inocuous conversation starter, but he came up empty. It was impossible to think of anything but Kurt at the moment.

Luckily, Blaine was saved from making awkward small talk with his boyfriend's dad, as Carole came bustling through the door with a nurse following close behind. Blaine and Burt were both on their feet in seconds, looking expectantly to the nurse for the news they'd been waiting for all night.

"Well?" Burt said impatiently, looking to the nurse. Carole walked to Burt and put her arm around him, attempting to simultaneously reassure and restrain Burt from jumping down the young nurse's throat.

"Hi," said the young nurse nervously. "Umm, Kurt's out of surgery. I'm one of the recovery room nurses. The surgeon said he was heading this way to talk to you about the surgery and how everything went."

Blaine and Burt both let out a breath in relief. "Great," said Burt. "So everything's okay? He's doing alright?"

"Umm yes," the nurse said, rocking back and forth slightly on her heels as she spoke. "But he's...umm, he's just waking up and keeps asking for someone named Blaine? I wasn't sure if..." she trailed off, unsure.

Blaine bit his lip and looked to Burt as Burt looked steadily back at him. "Well, go on then..." Burt said gruffly, looking at Blaine with an unreadable expression on his face.

Blaine looked back at him, unsure. "Are you sure you don't want to..." he started hesitantly.

Carole was the first to respond. "Blaine honey, Burt and I need to wait here so that we can talk to the doctor. Why don't you go back there and keep him company and we'll be there in just a few minutes, okay?"

Blaine shook his head mutely, still not able to come up with the right words. Kurt was awake. Kurt had asked for him. And in that moment, all that Blaine wanted was to see with his own eyes that Kurt was okay.

Without a word, the nurse led him down a series of corridors, past a large door marked "staff only – no admittance." The door opened up into a large room centered around a nurse's station. Each bed was partitioned off by a curtain, some open and some closed. The nurse led him to the second to last bed on the right and pulled back a curtain to expose Kurt.

Blaine's heart stuttered as he took in Kurt's appearance. He was pale against the hospital gown and white sheets. His eyes were closed, but his face was tensed with pain. An oxygen mask covered his nose and mouth. But worst of all, Kurt was struggling. His free hand fisted the blanket covering him and his body shook slightly as he tried in vain to get up. His voice was scratchy and barely above a whisper, but as Blaine got closer, he finally made out what Kurt was saying. Blaine.Shit.

Blaine was by Kurt's side in an instant, his hand automatically covering Kurt's free hand as he stroked Kurt's hair with the other. Kurt shuddered slightly as Blaine made contact with him, but did not open his eyes. "Kurt?" Blaine called out tenatively. "Hey Kurt, I'm here. It's okay. Just take it easy, alright?"

"Blaine?" Kurt whimpered. His hand instinctively tightened around Blaine's as if he was scared Blaine might leave him.

"Yeah, honey. I'm here. You're okay. Just lay still, Kurt. You just had surgery, remember?" Blaine spoke gently as he continued to trace soothing patterns across the back of Kurt's hand.

Kurt's face tightened in recognition. He squeezed Blaine's hand tighter as he remembered where he was. "Blaine?" he called again, slightly louder this time.

"Yeah Kurt?"

"Blaine...it...it still hurts. They said it would stop. Why won't it stop?" Kurt sniffed.

Blaine scooted closer to the bed, wanting to reassure Kurt physically as much as he could. He brought Kurt's right hand to his lips and kissed it gently while his other hand trailed through his soft hair before coming to rest gently against his temple. Kurt's brow felt much cooler than it had hours earlier, but it was still a touch too warm and clammy from a combination of pain and anxiety.

Blaine stomach tightened at the pain in Kurt's voice. He hated this feeling of helplessness. All that Blaine wanted was for Kurt to be okay, and he was powerless to do anything but provide the most basic of comforts. At times like these, Blaine couldn't help but feel like it wasn't enough, that he wasn't enough for Kurt. But as he watched Kurt cling to his hand as if it was the life raft of a drowning man, he knew he had to try to be the boyfriend Kurt needed at the moment.

Blaine started by turning to a nurse who was jotting down numbers in a thick chart near the foot of Kurt's bed. He looked to her pleadingly. "He...he's in a lot of pain. Can't you...give him something?"

"Sure, let me check. I'll be right back. Just...try to keep him still if you can. He's been moving around a lot and that's not helping with the pain." The nurse gave Blaine a sympathetic smile before disappearing, leaving Blaine and Kurt alone momentarily.

Blaine turned back to Kurt, slightly relieved that there was something that he could do to help. "Hey Kurt, the nurse is going to get you some more pain medicine, okay? Just hang on for a few minutes."

Tears began to seep from Kurt's eyes from a mixture of pain and frustration. He was so tired and it hurt so damn much, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't give in to the fatigue and sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, the gnawing pain in his side brought him back to the surface, keeping him floating somewhere between asleep and awake. He just wanted to escape, to curl up somewhere safe and warm and sleep until this ordeal was over.

But the pain and darkness kept him disoriented, so Kurt searched for anything safe and home that he could cling to. From the moment he first became aware, there was only one thing he truly needed.Blaine.Kurt was scared and in pain and miserable, and for whatever reason, he knew that only Blaine could make him feel better, make him feel safe again. So Kurt had continued to struggle until the one person he truly needed was by his side. And now he clung to Blaine, scared that if he blinked or sucumbed to the blackness for a second, he would be alone again.

Blaine bit his lip as he watched tears seep from Kurt's still closed eyes. He quickly brought his hand to Kurt's cheek to wipe away the tears. "Kurt...sweetheart, don't cry... Shh, it's okay. Kurt, please..." Blaine pleaded.

"I...B-Bl-Blaine, it hurts," Kurt managed between sobs.

Blaine sighed heavily. "I know, Kurt. I know. The nurse will be back any second now, okay? It's going to get better. Just...just squeeze my hand, Kurt. I'm right here."

Kurt shuddered and then slowly pried open his eyes, looking at Blaine for the first time since he'd been brought out of surgery. He blinked against the bright overhead lights and tears in his eyes, taking in Blaine's worried face hovering above him. Blaine looked so tired. "Hi," Kurt whispered tentatively.

Blaine gave Kurt a sad smile in spite of himself. "Hi honey," he said in response.

Kurt looked around the small space, wincing as his body shifted slightly with the turn on his head, before looking back to Blaine in confusion. "Is my dad here?"

Blaine nodded. "Yeah, he and Carole are talking to the doctors right now. Do you want me to go get him?" Blaine asked, still unsure.

Kurt's reaction was immediate. He tightened his grip on Blaine's hand and shook his head vehemently. "No, don't leave. I...I need you. Just stay, please," Kurt all but pleaded.

"Okay, okay...I'm not going anywhere, Kurt. I'm right here," Blaine soothed, squeezing his hand reassuringly as he spoke. Out of the corner of his eye, Blaine saw the nurse gesturing to him and turned to see her hold up a hand. "One second," she mouthed. He nodded in response and turned back to Kurt, feeling light with relief.

"Hey, the nurse just said she'd be back in one second, okay? You're doing great, Kurt," Blaine reassured, brushing his hand through Kurt's hair as he spoke. He watched as Kurt nodded, biting his lip and wincing, but staying silent despite his obvious pain. "Anything I can do?" Blaine asked tentatively.

Kurt shook his head and squeezed Blaine's hand tighter as his eyes slid close again. "Just don't let go of my hand, okay? I...I need you here."

"Deal," Blaine said, planting a kiss on Kurt's forehead and settling back into the chair to wait.

He smiled as the nurse returned carrying a syringe filled with a clear fluid. "Sorry, that took so long," she chirped, looking to Kurt's monitors and ensuring that his vital signs were stable before injecting the contents of the syringe into Kurt's waiting IV port. "This should help with the pain. Kurt, you should try to rest if you can. Hopefully, we'll move you up to your room in about an hour. Just try to take it easy for now, okay?"

Kurt nodded, his eyes alread half-lidded from a mixture of pain and fatigue.

The nurse nodded, satisfied with the output on the monitors. She turned to Blaine before leaving. "Let me know if he needs anything else or if the medicine starts to make him nauseous."

Blaine smiled gratefully. "I will. Thanks for your help." He turned back to Kurt and was relieved to see that some of the tension had already left his face. "Feeling better, Kurt?" he asked.

"Mmhm, yup. Muu-cch better," Kurt slurred, a slightly dopey grin on his face as he looked up at Blaine.

Blaine stiffled a laugh at the sudden contrast in Kurt's demeanor. "Good," he responded. "You should try to get some sleep, okay?" He smiled down at Kurt, suddenly remembering the many ridiculous things that Kurt had said while under the influence of Morphine earlier. He would have to jot some of them down to tease Kurt with when he was recovered.

He looked back down to Kurt and watched as he struggled mightily to keep his eyes open despite his fatigue. It was taking near Herculean effort for Kurt to simply hold his eyelids open and the effect was comical. "Kurt? What are you doing? Just close your eyes, okay?" Blaine directed.

"No...don' wanna," Kurt slurred petuantly. "You'll leave. Don't want...yooou to go, Blaaaaine," Kurt whined.

Blaine's heart filled love for his ridiculously adorable and slightly unreasonable boyfriend. "Kurt, I already told you, I'm not going anywhere, alright? Look," he commanded, raising their interlocked hands until they were within easy view of Kurt's eyes. "Feel my hand? I'm not going to let go, okay? But Kurt, you just had major surgery and it is the middle of the night and you really need to get some sleep, okay? I promise I'll be here when you wake up."

"You prom-ise, Blaine? 'Cause you can't break a prom-ise. That would make you a very, very...very bad boyfriend, 'kay?" Kurt slurred as his eyes fell shut despite his best efforts to keep them open.

Blaine chuckled and resumed stroking Kurt's hair, causing Kurt to give a hum of contentment as he turned into Blaine's touch. "I promise, Kurt. Pinky swear. Now, go to sleep."

Kurt's soft snores were the only signal that he'd heard Blaine. Blaine's shoulders relaxed and tension poured off him in waves as he watched Kurt breathe deeply and evenly, still clutching Blaine's hand tightly even in sleep.

Blaine was startled when the curtain surrounding Kurt's bed was pulled open and looked up to see Burt and Carole carefully making their way to Kurt's bedside. Blaine surreptitiously wiped the remaining moisture from his eyes before looking to Burt. He frowned slightly as he noticed the pale cast to Burt's skin and the tension in his face. He looked more worried than he had before Kurt had been brought out of surgery, rather than relieved that Kurt was doing well. Irrational panic surged up in Blaine's stomach as he started imagining the horrible things that the doctor could have told them about Kurt's condition. Kurt seemed better, but was there something that Blaine didn't know?

Before he could find a tactful way to voice his fears, Carole rounded the bed and brought a hand to Kurt's temple, brushing his hair back gently and smiling. Burt too moved forward grapsing Kurt's unoccupied left hand in his. He sat there for a minute simply taking Kurt in before he looked to Blaine. "How's he doing?" Burt asked gruffly, his voice betraying the slightest hint of emotion as he spoke.

"He...he's better. He was in pain, so the nurse just gave him some more pain medicine and he just fell asleep again. But...he was asking about you. I told him you were here," Blaine responded. He shifted back in his chair a bit, wanting to give Kurt's family more room to be with Kurt. He loosened his grip on Kurt's hand ever so slightly as he moved backwards. Almost immediately, Kurt let out a small noise of protest and gripped Blaine's hand tighter, his eyes never opening but making his needs known despite his semi-conscious state.

Blaine gripped Kurt's hand tighter and trailed his other hand up to rest against Kurt's upper arm. "Shh Kurt," he soothed unconsciously. He looked up to see Burt considering him with an unreadable expression on his face. Blaine cleared his throat and worked up the courage to ask Burt about the surgeon's update, still feeling uneasy that there was something that they weren't telling him.

"Did he..." he started uncomfortably. "What did the doctor say? Did the surgery go well?" Blaine asked nervously.

He watched as Burt and Carole exchanged looks before Burt turned back to address him. Burt sighed heavily before turning back to Blaine. Burt sunk into the chair at the head of Kurt's bed, looking down at Kurt's hand still wrapped protectively in both of his before responding. "He...he's going to be fine, Blaine," Burt answerered evasively.

Blaine felt his stomach drop despite Burt's reassurances. He was more sure than ever that there was something else that he wasn't being told. He opened his mouth to say more, but the look of utter exhaustion in Burt's eyes stopped him cold. He'd promised Kurt that he would look out for his dad, that he would make sure that Kurt's illness didn't start to effect Burt's health. Tomorrow, he silently vowed. Tomorrow he'd be braver. Tomorrow he'd find out the truth. But for now, Kurt was sleeping comfortably, his hand locked in Blaine's. For now, that was enough.