You were never my friend, you were never my, you were never my lover.

Stutter – Darren Criss

It was a couple of weeks later and hed not checked Facebook once, deciding it was doing him no good - that was his old life.  Hed not managed to get hold of Sam so hed stopped trying and had focused on enjoying where he was.  His parents and Cooper had flown back the week before and he was heading to Trafalgar Square to meet Thom.  Thom was due to conduct Verdis ‘Requiem' that evening - he was at RADA on a music scholarship and so had obligations to fill in his spare time, such as serving as Organist and conductor at various venues related to RADA.  The first time Blaine had seen Thom play his breath had caught in his throat.  Thom had been sat with his back to the empty chapel and the sunlight had streamed through the stained glass panes, back-lighting Thom and making his dark hair shine with hundreds of colours.  He looked so serene; his shoulders relaxed, his head moving slightly as he lost himself to the music.  Blaine smiled at the memory.  Thom had turned, feeling someones eyes on him, and smiled when hed seen Blaine.  Smiled.  Blaines step lightened as he lost himself in the memory, heading down the steps towards the lions in the centre.  Someones hand on his shoulder stopped him as he passed them.

Oh, sorry!  I was wondering if you knew how to get to...Blaine?

Blaines heart hit the floor. 

Kurt?!

Blaine!  Kurt was grinning.

Oh my God, Kurt!  W…what are you doing here?

Trying to find you!

Blaine frowned at the man standing in front of him.  Kurt was in London.  Trying to find him.

Surprise...?  Kurts smile faded a little.  Blaine seemed to have lost the ability to think or breathe or move for that matter.

Blaine, are you ok?  Blaine shook his head lightly then took a breath.

Sorry, just really wasnt expecting to see you.  He pulled himself together and offered a smile that felt forced.  Kurt didnt seem to notice.

We have to stop meeting like this.  Kurt attempted to joke.  Blaine was barely keeping himself together.  So, how've...

Please dont ask me how Ive been, Kurt.

Blaine, Im so sorry.

Look, Im supposed to be meeting a friend...

Oh.  Of course.  Um...  Im staying at the Strand Palace Hotel.  Could we maybe meet for coffee later?

Im working tonight.

Thats fine.  After that?

I wont be out until 11.

Im all jetlagged anyway.  11 is fine.

OK.  Ill meet you at your hotel?  Have you got a phone?  Kurt nodded and handed it to Blaine.  Blaine entered his number.  I think I know where it is but text me the address.

OK.

Know where you are now?

Trafalgar Square?

Yes.  Have you got a Tube Map?

Yes.  Kurt unfolded it. 

Blaine gently took it and pointed to the nearest station. 

‘Walk that way to Charring Cross then take the Bakerloo Line (the brown one) towards Queens Park.  Get off at Piccadilly (this one) and take the Piccadilly line (dark blue) towards Heathrow.  Get off at South Kensington.  The V&A museum is right there.  They have an Elizabeth Taylor exhibition on - its a good way to spend a day.  Ill see you later.

Thanks, Blaine.

Blaine nodded and somehow managed to walk away, his head spinning.  He didnt turn to look back.  He refused to think about what had just happened.  He walked until he saw Thom sitting at their usual table outside the small cafe near the chapel. 

Thought you werent going to make it!

Sorry, Thom.  Blaine huffed as he flopped down in the metal chair next to Thom then looked at his watch.

Are you OK?  You look like youve seen a ghost.

Its nothing.

Thom gave him a critical look but knew not to push.

Come on, old chap.  Got you one to go.  Thom handed Blaine the coffee and Blaine smiled in appreciation.

Thank you, Thom.

1 new message

Kurt: 372 Strand, London, WC2R 0JJ.  You look really good by the way.

Blaine didnt allow himself to think.  Hed given the best performance of his life and was now moments away from seeing his...  he wasnt sure what Kurt was anymore.  He was waiting for him outside the hotel.  He was breath-taking.

Hi.  Kurt was smiling at him again.

Hi. 

So, coffee?

Sure.

Um... I think I saw a place that may still be open.  I think it was that way.

Blaine looked amused and fell into step as Kurt led them away from the hotel.

It was light earlier.  Um... I think it was just down here.  It all looks so different in the dark.  I mean, at least in New York you have an idea of how many blocks it was or whether it was east or west...

They eventually saw a Starbucks and Kurt huffed in triumph.  Blaine chuckled lightly and held the door for Kurt. 

Old habits die... 

He shook the thought away, refusing to dwell.

Just see what he wants.

Ill grab us a table upstairs.  Blaine didnt wait for a response - he was testing him.  Upstairs was deserted so he found the comfiest looking nook complete with leather sofa and settled down.  There hadnt been much of a queue so Kurt was not long in joining him.  Kurt placed the filter coffee in front of Blaine together with a stirrer and handful of sugar packets.  Hed remembered.  Thanks.

Kurt had smiled gently at him and stirred his own frothy-looking coffee.

So, what did you want to talk about?

Kurt started slightly at Blaines bluntness.

I heard about the show.

Rachel.

Rachel.

Im so proud of you.

Thanks.  Blaine took a sip of coffee and waited.  Kurt was looking at him as if trying to work something out.  You didnt come all the way over to London just to say that.

No.

So?

Look, Blaine.  Im...

Say youre sorry, Kurt, and Im out the door.

I deserved that.

Fiery hazel eyes locked with turbulent glasz.

I was going to say that Im on a placement with Vogue.com so Ill be in London for the next year.

Blaine nodded slightly.  It made sense.  That was why he was in London.  He must have graduated from NYADA last term.

Why, Blaine?

Why what?

Why did you leave?

Why not?  Its worked out pretty well for me.  I didnt have a reason to go to New York.  Nothing was tying me to the US.

Kurt looked down at his coffee.

So, what is this, Kurt?  We friends again because Im the only person you know in London?

No!

Then what, Kurt?  You didnt call, you didnt write...

I didnt have your number.

My e-mail address never changed.

I was mad at you.

Blaine laughed.

You were mad at me?  What did I do, Kurt?

You almost died.

Yeah, sorry about that.  Selfish of me I know.

Blaine, please listen.  Its coming out all wrong. Blaine took a deep breath and let Kurt think for a moment.  I was scared.

Of what?

Losing you.

People die every day, Kurt.  Every damn day.

Theyre not you.

So what are you trying to tell me here?  That I should have just gone to New York and waited for you to come around and that we should be living our happy ever after right now?

Yes?

Damn it, Kurt.

Theres someone else, right?  I'm mean of course there is…

How can you even ask me that?

They stared at their respective coffees.  Blaine huffed.

Its been a really long day - Im going to go.  Good to see you, Kurt.  He made to leave.  Kurt grabbed his hand.

Blaine, please.

Blaine sat back down.  Silence.

Look, I screwed up.  Id been in denial about us for months and Santana had kept going on at me about it, but then I had my Dad to focus on...  Kurt started lining the extra sugar packets up again like he had in the Lima Bean years before when he had been worried sick about his father.  ...and there you were.  The constant in my life.  I never stopped loving you, you know?  I was just so scared and overwhelmed.  We were together again and then suddenly theres a doctor telling us that you could just drop down dead any day.  Any day with no warning.  And I panicked.  You needed me and I left you.  Again.

Why now, Kurt?  Dont tell me its just because of this placement thing because I dont buy it.

I couldnt do it anymore.

Do what?

Lie to myself.

You seem to have done a pretty good job of doing just that for two years.  So, why now?  Why not last year or the year before or when I was stuck in the damn hospital?  Have a bad break-up?  Is that it?  Am I your go-to rebound now?

No!

Then why, Kurt.  Explain it to me, I have brain damage remember.  Im a little slow to follow where youre going with this.  Spell it out for me.

Because I am in love with you.  Because when you left you took a part of me with you.

Blaine laughed.

Youre in love with an idea.  That boy in the blazer who would have moved the Earth to make you smile.  That boy does not exist, not any more.  You dont even know me.

Then lets start over.  Lets get to know each other again!

Why?  What for?  You said it yourself - I could drop down dead any day now.

I dont care.  Almost a whisper.

Why?  What changed?

I grew up.  I realised that what we had - that was real and you know it was.  You knew I needed time to deal with this.  You knew Id have got there eventually with your help.  You knew and you still decided to draw a line under us and leave!  Why didnt you tell me you were leaving for London?!

You werent talking to me!  You left me alone and scared in a hospital to have brain surgery!

They had been shouting.  A small mousy barista had poked her head up the stairs to see what was going on.  Blaine stood and apologised to her then ordered two more drinks passing her a £20 and telling her to keep the change.  She retreated back down the stairs to make the drinks and Blaine turned back around to face Kurt, slowly, resting against the banister.

How did you think this would go, Kurt?

Kurt laughed sadly. 

Um... I was going to surprise you at the theatre.  I was going wait at the stage door and I was going to sing to you.

Blaine laughed sadly.

You were heading in the wrong direction.  You should have gone east not west from your hotel.'  Blaine sighed.  ‘How did things get this messed up?

Blaine...  Their eyes met again.  Gravity.  Kurt was standing in front of him, their hands interlinked.  Blaine, I promise you, I will never leave you again, not if I can help it.  Im going to be there for you in whatever capacity you will let me.  I am going to talk to you when I feel insecure and Im going to listen when you need me to.  Whether thats as your friend, or your...your  partner.  That doesnt matter to me.  I am here for you.

A small cough from behind them alerted them to the fact that their new drinks had arrived.  The girl had added biscotti to their plates.  She placed the tray gently on the table and left again.  Kurt thanked her then turned back to Blaine.

One more chance, Blaine?

Blaine closed his eyes and felt himself nodding lightly.

He felt Kurts lips brush his then felt Kurt pull him back towards the sofa.

Come on.

He felt himself collapse slightly as he let go.

So, Mr., we have a lot to catch-up on.  Tell me everything.  Tell me about RADA, and Wicked.  Wicked, Blaine!  I always saw you as Fiyero...

Blaine opened his eyes and he swore they were back in the Lima Bean, Kurt almost bouncing in his chair as he told Blaine about Santana verbally attacking Rachel and Finn after their impromptu kiss cost the New Directions Nationals. 

He shook his head lightly to clear his mind.  He let go.  Let go of the hurt and the guilt and the anger and the pain.  There was nothing but now.  Nothing but London, the coffee and Kurt.