June 25, 2013, 2:02 p.m.
Courage: November 28 1:09am
E - Words: 201 - Last Updated: Jun 25, 2013 Story: Closed - Chapters: 53/? - Created: Nov 27, 2012 - Updated: Jun 25, 2013 413 0 0 0 0
November 28
1:09am
Fuck.
I just woke up and kinda freaked out a little bit.
At first I couldn't remember where I was and I completely panicked.
I thought I was back there...
I must have been having a nightmare about being back at the motel with him because I woke up in a cold sweat and felt like I was going to be sick. I made sure to be quiet so I didn't wake anyone up.
I can still feel his hands all over me.
I hate that I can't get a decent sleep without being plagued by these stupid nightmares.
I actually got out of bed and locked the door.
Then I just stared at it for like... ever... waiting for something bad to happen.
I'm so tired of feeling like this.
I wish I'd never gone to that stupid dance.
I wish my parents never found out about me.
I wish I'd never been kicked out of Dalton.
And I really wish that I'd never even gone to that disgusting motel in the first place.
If I'd known that's what he wanted, I would have figured out a different way to make money for school.
Without letting him turn me into some disgusting, useless whore.
I let it happen.
I just want to stop feeling like I'm a bad person...