Sept. 18, 2014, 7 p.m.
Just a Look: Chapter 5
E - Words: 3,897 - Last Updated: Sep 18, 2014 Story: Closed - Chapters: 8/? - Created: Sep 18, 2014 - Updated: Sep 18, 2014 139 0 0 0 0
Songs used: If I Fell by the Beatles and S&M by Rihanna.
"Kurt! Kurt wait!" Blaine called, following him through the crowd of dancing men. Blaine couldnt even begin to register what just happened, one moment he and Kurt were kissing and the next Kurt was gone. Blaine wondered if he had done something wrong or if Kurt was okay.
Finally he found Kurt leaning against a wall near the back of the club, his eyes shut and his arms wrapped around himself. Once he got close enough he noticed that Kurts face was paler than normal, and Blaine was worried he was going to be sick.
"Kurt…" Blaine said softly. When Kurt didnt respond he hesitantly touched his arm. "Kurt, are you okay?"
Kurt flinched at Blaines touch and Blaine took a step back, not wanting to make things worse. Kurt looked up and relaxed once he finally registered who it was. "Hi," he exhaled. His voice wasnt as shaky as when he had left Blaine on the dance floor, but it was still lacking the confidence it had possessed for the past hours.
"Hi," Blaine returned, trying to find Kurts eyes. "What happened back there?"
Kurt seemed tentative to answer at first, but finally he cleared his throat and allowed himself to speak, this time much more confident. "I just- I thought I saw someone. But I didnt. It just freaked me out and I didnt want to freak you out so I…" Kurt looked at Blaine and nodded. "I still freaked you out…"
"Only a little bit. But I was more worried than anything."
"Nothing like that has ever happened to me…He just-" Kurt looked down and shook his head. Blaine took Kurts hand and rubbed his thumb across the back of it, trying to let him know everything was alright.
Blaine didnt want to ask, because obviously if one person could cause this kind of reaction Kurt wouldnt want to talk about it. "Youre a really good dancer," Blaine said, changing the subject.
"Hmm…Not as good as you, though," Kurt responded, a shy playfulness coming back to his voice.
"Im really not a dancer," Blaine stated meekly.
Kurt lightheartedly rolled his eyes and the color filled back into his cheeks. "Even you know youre lying. I mean, what was that move you were doing at the end there? Your hand was two seconds away from being down my pants."
Blaine felt a blush creep so far up his cheeks that he probably looked like a tomato. "I was not…I wouldnt-"
"Im just kidding!" Kurt laughed, preventing Blaine from becoming a stuttering mess. "Anyway, Im pretty sure more than a few people enjoyed the show we put on out there."
Every time Kurt smiled Blaine felt warmth surge through his body. Blaine couldnt explain where it came from and couldnt tell if hed ever felt it before, but he knew that he wanted nothing more than to cause the light in Kurts eyes for as long as he could, even if that lasted only the night.
So when that smile faded once again Blaine knew he had to do something.
Kurts eyes drifted past Blaine and suddenly squeezed shut. The hand Blaine was holding started shaking and Kurts face turned white, as if he were seeing a ghost.
Blaine held Kurt steady and tried to pull them as far away from the crowd as possible. He knew Kurt had spotted the same guy he had seen earlier, and although it wasnt who Kurt originally thought it was, it still caused the same effect. Blaine couldnt even bring himself to turn around and look at the guy. He felt it was better to never know who could have made Kurt feel like this.
"Kurt, its okay. Youre okay," he whispered, their foreheads so close they were almost touching.
Even though Kurt was taller than Blaine, in that moment he seemed so small. Blaine wanted nothing more than to stand there and hold him for as long as he possibly could.
"He just looks so much like him…" Kurt sounded as if he was holding back tears. "Im sorry I-I understand if you dont want to be around me anymore."
"Shh," Blaine murmured, pulling Kurt into his arms. Kurt rested his hands on Blaines chest and laid his head on his shoulder. "Dont worry, be happy," Blaine sang in a whisper.
Blaine could feel Kurt smile against his neck. "Youre very different, Blaine Anderson."
"Hmm, and how would that be?"
"I havent figured that out yet."
"Well, while youre figuring that out can you please explain to me how you know my last name?"
Kurt pulled away with a sniffle and smiled. "Maybe after we get out of here. Its your turn to pick our next Somewhere."
Blaine knew exactly where he wanted to go.
After taking a cab Blaine arrived with Kurt at a small bar near his school. "We celebrated my friend Wes birthday here freshman year and it sort of became a tradition," Blaine told him, leading Kurt through the doors of the dimly lit bar.
Kurt lifted an eyebrow until the sound of music and an off tone nearly shrieking noise filled his ears. "A karaoke bar, very interesting."
Blaine tried to keep a straight face as the singer—if they could have been called that—attempted the high note of Katy Perrys Roar. "Its probably one of the only places I actually enjoy. It can get pretty crazy."
"Oh I bet," Kurt chuckled.
"Im serious, especially since this place is open all night."
"Well I hope we arent staying all night because theres still one last place I want to take you."
"If you want to go we dont have to stay here it was just a thought I-" Blaine rambled, heading back toward the door.
"Blaine stop," Kurt said, taking Blaines hands and pulling him back. "This is an adventure, right? And it wouldnt be an appropriate adventure if we werent both having fun."
Kurt led Blaine to a small table near the stage and they sat down. Blaine couldnt help but notice their touching knees. "So whos going first?" Kurt asked.
"First what?"
"Singing, obviously. Isnt that why were here?"
"I dont usually sing…I-"
"Wait, so you go to a karaoke bar to what, enjoy the scenery? I mean that signed life size poster of Kelly Clarkson in the corner is rather a spectacle."
Blaine crossed his arms. "I like watching my friends sing, there isnt a problem with that. And Im rusty anyway, you really dont want to hear me sing."
"How about you tell your shower that. Its probably heard you being rusty quite often. I bet itd tell you that you sound wonderful."
"Yeah well showers dont talk."
Kurt pointed at Blaines chest. "Youre just afraid that if you start performing again in any capacity youll start missing it too much."
Blaine tried to say something but stumbled over his words. Was that the reason? Was he avoiding performing because he knew once he started he couldnt get away?
"You really do know everything…"
Kurt looked at him in an unwavering seriousness. "Thats right, Blaine. Actually I knew your full name because I read minds. I also have magical powers, but I dont usually let people see them until I know them better."
Blaine tried to chuckle but Kurts expression didnt change. "Wait, you what?"
Kurts expression suddenly crumbled until laughter poured into the bar. "Im just kidding. Maybe we shouldnt have let you drink." Kurt put his hand over Blaines on the table. "But its okay, Ill take very, very good care of you."
Blaine almost forgot how to breathe.
"So I guess Ill go first. But if I go you have to promise youll go," Kurt said, getting up from the table.
"Ill think about it." Blaine knew he was lying, and he knew Kurt could tell.
Kurt sat back down and took Blaines hand, his blue eyes finding Blaines and making it feel as if Blaine couldnt pull away. Blaine waited for Kurt to say something, and every time he thought words would come there was only silence. And suddenly, without warning, Kurt leaned forward and kissed him gently. Kurt could probably feel Blaines heart beating and he didnt know whether to be embarrassed or kiss back. Before Blaine could decide Kurt had pulled away, and his eyes were cast down at their hands, which somehow had become intertwined.
"So you promise youll think about it?" Kurt finally asked.
Blaine nodded slowly and Kurt grinned. He knew exactly what he was doing.
A few minutes later Kurt walked up onto the small stage with a microphone in his hand. The room slowly quieted as Kurt started to speak. "Hey everyone, Im Kurt. Im not sure if Im supposed to introduce myself or not but…Im not really used to going with strangers to karaoke bars at almost two in the morning." Kurt found Blaine in the crowd and smiled. "Well hes not really a stranger anymore…" Kurt fixed the microphone stand and pointed at the guy who started the music. "So I wanted to share some Beatles with you all, its a slow song so try to stay awake, it will be over soon."
As the music began to play Kurt closed his eyes. Blaine watched as his hands fell to his sides and he breathed slowly, taking everything in before finally singing those first few words.
If I fell in love with you
Would you promise to be true?
And help me understand
Cause Ive been in love before
And Ive found that love was more
Than just holding hands
With every word Kurt sang Blaine felt himself being drawn in. Kurts voice was more amazing than Blaine had even fathomed. Kurt didnt look at Blaine much, his eyes were either down or out toward the audience, as if he was avoiding Blaines gaze. Blaine felt almost as if he was intruding on some intimate moment that somehow only belonged to Kurt. Even though he was standing in front of a room full of people he was standing alone, and it was one of the most beautiful moments Blaine had ever seen.
As Kurt finished the song, Blaine found himself walking toward the stage.
So I hope you see
That I would love to love you
And that he will cry
When he learns we are two
If I fell in love with you
Once the music stopped Kurt looked at Blaine with glossy eyes from tears that refused to fall. The bar applauded as Blaine helped Kurt off the stage.
Kurt rubbed his eyes and chuckled. "Sorry, I get a little emotional when I sing."
"I thought it was wonderful. Your voice…I cant believe your show choir didnt let you have any solos. I swear if you were a Warbler Id make everyone let you sing."
"I think thats just your way of saying youd make me sing with you." Kurts grin was so wide that Blaine couldnt tell if it was the alcohol or if Kurt was just always like this.
Blaine didnt even register that he wasnt responding; only staring into Kurts sparkling eyes. Were they actually sparkling or was he just imagining that? He was standing in the middle of a bar staring into the eyes of a man hed met only hours ago like hed known him his whole life, and he didnt care. Why didnt he care?
Kurt tilted his head ever so slightly and then started shaking his head, which barely pulled Blaine out of his trance-like state. "Blaine, we cant-"
All of a sudden Blaine jumped as his phone started to vibrate. He made a disgruntled face at Kurt, who just nodded and replied, "Its okay, we can talk later," before walking away.
Blaine looked at his phone as he walked out the back door of the bar. It was Wes.
He hadnt told any of his friends he left the party.
"Hey Wes I-"
"Where are you?" Wes asked abruptly, but Blaine could tell he was drinking. "David and I have texted you like 20 times."
"I couldnt stand the party so I left. Im sorry I got caught up in something and I forgot to text you."
"So youre okay? After what happened freshman year… I was just really worried."
"I can assure you Im just fine." Blaine leaned back against the building. "Actually I dont think Ive ever been better."
"Wait. Youre not home?"
"Nope." Blaine couldnt stop himself from giggling.
"Blaine…no…youre not with a guy, are you?"
"Mhm." Blaine covered his face with one of his hands, which was hot from the blush that was creeping up his cheeks. "I dont know whats wrong with me; Im not acting like myself. But its a completely amazing better version of me and I dont want it to go away. And this guy…hes just so…I cant even describe it. Hes so unique and Ive never met anyone like him before. And I told him about what happened freshman year and Ive never told anyone but you guys."
Blaine didnt even hear the door open.
"David wants to know if youre gonna sleep with him."
Blaine rolled his eyes. Typical David. "Yeah, tell David I only want his dick. And tell him that I told him about freshman year so hed feel sorry enough to sleep with me."
Blaine heard the back door shut and peered over to see if anyone was outside before sitting back against the brick wall once again.
"I dont know. Thats probably the last thing thats on my mind right now." Blaine laughed at himself, because the first thought on his mind was how Kurts face was going to look as he sang for him. "Are you guys okay? Are you still at the party?"
"Yeah, yeah. David is pretty wasted and has basically been all over some girl all night. Turns out shes on Broadway. Go figure."
Once he finally got Wes to hang up Blaine walked back inside and noticed that Kurt was over by the bar, which wasnt overly crowded. Blaine had waited a few extra minutes outside to debate what song he wanted to sing for Kurt. As he tried to get Kurts attention, Kurt looked over at him for a brief moment before taking a shot and telling something to the bartender.
"Sorry about that," Blaine said when he reached Kurt and sat at the counter next to him. "It was just one of my friends who I went with to the party. Sounds like the party turned out to be really lame. Im glad we ditched it."
Kurt smiled, although it was more of a smirk than the smiles hed been seeing previously. "I bet you are."
"My friends are totally wasted. I could hardly understand what they were trying to tell me."
At that moment the bartender set two shots in from of Kurt, which looked to be vodka.
"I dont know, Blaine. Dont you want to be a little loosened up?" Kurt slid the shot over to Blaine and leaned over so his mouth was right next to his ear. "For when we go back to your place…" He murmured into Blaines ear as he ran his hand up Blaines thigh.
Blaine could feel the hair on his arms stand up as a shiver ran through his body. "M-My place?"
"I would say my place but my roommate doesnt really like visitors."
"I-I think Im fine. I already had a lot to drink at the club." Blaine choked out as Kurt sat back.
Kurt let out a boisterous laugh. "You had half of a Long Island ice tea."
"Well that was the first time Ive drank in years," Blaine persisted. "And Im a lightweight anyway," he managed to say under his breath. Blaine had some to drink at the club but thats all he wanted to drink. He didnt want to get drunk and repeat the past. And even though he trusted Kurt, he wasnt ready.
"And I bet you did that just for me didnt you." Blaine was thrown off by Kurts sarcastic tone and hard expression. And although Kurt was sitting next to him, it felt like he was pushing himself a hundred miles away.
Blaine scooted his barstool closer to Kurt. "Kurt, is everything okay?"
"Why wouldnt everything be okay?" Kurt shrugged and leaned in closer, and suddenly Blaine felt uncomfortable. Something was off. "Come on, Blaine. Lets have some fun."
"I thought we were already having fun. Are you not having a good time? We can leave if you want."
Kurt rolled his eyes. "Just take the drink."
"I really dont want it."
"I just want you to have a good time."
"Kurt I dont want it!" He raised his voice in frustration as Kurt picked up the shot glass and waved it near his face.
"Fine Ill just have both!" Kurt took a quick shot and then picked up Blaines glass, which Blaine stopped him from drinking by grabbing his arm gently.
"I dont want you to do something youre going to regret."
Kurt stared at him with a blank expression until he started nodding, as if something in his brain had clicked. "Right. We dont want it to be too sloppy."
"Kurt I wasnt planning on-"
"Sing with me," Kurt interjected, pulling Blaine from the bar, although this time his grip felt tighter and less careful.
"Well I was actually going to sing something for you…" Blaine replied as Kurt dragged him to the area where people were supposed to sign up. There werent that many people in the bar so no one was lined up to sing.
"Well I was thinking we should sing together. And I have a great song for us."
"What song is it?" Blaine asked after Kurt was done signing up.
"Oh, youll know it for sure."
Kurt took Blaine on stage after they were handed their microphones. This time the music started before they could give any introductions, and Blaine immediately felt his whole body immediately turn red.
Na na na
Come on
Kurts voice was rougher and lower than everything hed heard earlier. Kurt kept his eyes fixed on Blaine with such intensity that it was becoming hard to look at him. He walked up behind Blaine and practically growled into his ear. "Youre supposed to sing."
"I-I" Blaine looked out to the crowd, which for the most part wasnt paying attention, except for a few who looked at them with confusion written all over their faces.
Blaine couldnt move or even think enough to bring the microphone to his lips.
"Kurt I-"
Kurt continued to sing with so much power that Blaine was afraid to do anything. During the chorus Kurt pressed his hand to Blaines chest, which then proceeded to travel up to his collar bone and then down his arms. "Why dont you want to sing with me?" Kurt pouted, but this time it was into the microphone, which caused people to look up and see what was going on.
At this point Blaine was passed the point of embarrassment, and he felt like at any moment he would pass out right there on stage. "I have to go," Blaine said shakily, walking off the stage as the instrumental continued to fill the room.
Blaine didnt know where to go. He didnt want to leave, but he also knew if he stayed any longer he might do something hed regret. He walked out the back door and stared into the alley behind the building, frozen as he tried to comprehend what just happened.
He didnt have much time, however, because Kurt soon followed him out the door.
"Why did you leave me?" Kurt asked with a pout.
"I-I just needed some air." The air wasnt too cold, but Blaine couldnt help but shiver.
"Here, let me warm you up," Kurt said, pushing Blaine back against the brick wall, much more forcefully than Blaine had anticipated.
"No- Kurt-" Blaines protests were suddenly cut short by rough, seemingly desperate kisses. Blaine wasnt sure of himself at first, but finally allowed himself to kiss back and wrap his arms around Kurts waist.
"I know this isnt as comfortable as you probably wanted," Kurt said between kisses, "but I guess it doesnt really matter where it is you get my dick as long as you get it." Kurts last words were forced through gritted teeth as he pushed Blaine harder up against the wall.
"What?"
Kurt gave one more final push before jerking away from Blaine and walking in the opposite direction.
"Jesus, Kurt!" Blaine called after the initial confusion. "Who are you right now?"
"Who am I?" Kurt turned around with an expression of total resentment. "Im the person who isnt going to fall for your stupid games."
"What games? Youre the one playing games. Why did you want to embarrass me so badly back in there?"
"Because you were planning to make me feel like shit so I might as well make you feel like shit too."
"Where is this coming from?" Blaine was on the brink of frustration. "I literally leave for five minutes and youve become a different person."
"Dont pretend you werent telling your friends about me."
Blaine froze. "How did you…"
"I was coming out to tell you…" Kurt stopped himself before he could answer. "It doesnt even matter what I was going to tell you because this night is finished."
"What did I say because obviously the person you were listening to wasnt me."
Blaine was surprised by how passionate Kurt sounded. "Dont pretend you didnt tell your friend that this whole night was some set-up so you could get into my pants."
And then it clicked, and Blaine smiled.
"Why are you smiling?"
"Because it was a joke. All of that was a joke because my friend is dumb and wanted to know too much."
Kurts exterior seemed to slowly melt away. "Well why were you talking about me?"
"I was telling them about you because this is probably one of the best nights Ive had since moving to New York. I was telling them about you because I have never met anyone like you and I think you have the most beautiful voice Ive ever heard. But mostly I was telling them about you because I dont know when that last time I was this happy, and I needed to share it with someone."
Kurt stared at him with a mix between disbelief and awe.
"I think Im just going to go," Blaine said, although it was probably the hardest thing he had to say that night.
"Wait."
Blaine stopped, but didnt turn around.
"I told you Id tell you how I knew your last name," Kurt told him, his voice barely audible.
Blaine looked back and nodded. "Go ahead."
"I noticed your signature on the receipt for the ice cream you paid for earlier. Blaine Anderson. I remember noticing how the o in Anderson looked a little weird."
Blaine smiled. "Thanks for letting me know I have weird os. Ill work on that."
"Dont. It was the moment I realized how special you are."
Blaine just stared at Kurt, who was biting his lip and taking small steps toward him.
"Im sorry about all of this. I tend to assume the worst in people because if I dont Ill get hurt. And I couldnt believe that you could have such an underlining faith in people that I decided to believe the first thing that proved my conclusion otherwise."
"And what was your conclusion?"
"That youre different in the best ways possible."
Blaine felt his cheeks turn red and he diverted his eyes away from Kurt, who was standing merely a foot in from of him.
"And I wanted to tell you how I knew your last name before you left because I wanted you to understand I dont read minds and I dont have magical powers. And obviously I dont know everything. I do know, however, that your eye did not twitch when you told me I was the most beautiful singer youve ever heard, which I do find quite charming."
"I would never lie about something like that."
"Do you think…we could start over?" Kurt asked gently. "Maybe sing an actual song together?"
Blaine grinned from ear-to-ear and held out his hand. "Id love that."