Chapter 2: Give me that feeling

AN: Thank you so much to my wonderful beta Lieve who has been so patient with me. This one is for you!

The merciless sun burning through the window waked Kurt. Disorientation kicked in and he tried to turn his head a little too fast to see where he was, only to experience the same severe pain down his spine that he felt yesterday. The events from yesterday came tumbling down on him, and suddenly he remembered where he was. Not that it made the situation any better. He noticed that Finn was not there anymore and the cute doctor had vanished. He has also miraculously rolled over on his back without any complications. A small smile tugged on Kurt's lips. It wasn't much, but he had accomplished something on his own. Hopefully, he'll be back home in no time again.

Then he felt the feeling. He had felt it so many times before, but now it was with so much more desperation because his body knew that he couldn't have it. Cocaine. Just thinking about it made Kurt's heart beat faster, his palms sweat and his throat feel like the Sahara dessert. He gritted his teeth and wanted the pain in his back to go away so that he could go find his secret stash in his apartment. He wished that he had his car, or even his shoes. The Craving, as Kurt liked to call it was tugging at his sleeve, reminding him of what he couldn't have.

Kurt got up slowly and bit his lip silently when the pain came back. Even though his body commanded him to go back to the bed so that he could rest, his mind was settled on reaching his jacket that hung on the wall by the door. He might have remains of an old dose. Maybe he could just have a snort and forget the pain. The painkillers doctor Anderson gave him had worn out, and he could feel the pain come back, steadier for each minute.

He hoped to find drugs, key cars or even a wallet, but the only thing is his pocket were a packet of cigarettes. It was no coke, but Kurt decided that nicotine was better than nothing at all. The small dark-haired boy started walking slowly towards the hospital entrance, entirely barefoot. For Kurt it felt like an hour and he was moving so slowly, moving as little of his spine as possible while he focused on putting one leg in front of the other. Finally he reached his destination.

He came to a decision to lean towards the wall instead of sitting down on the bench, seeing how sitting and rising seemed to be so painful for him. Kurt lit the cigarette with shaky hands, and inhaled deeply. The smoke filled his lungs and he relished in the familiar feeling of the burning. But he wanted more, he craved more. Anything that could give him a kick or a feeling of living. Again, he cursed the lack of car keys and shoes.

He closed his eyes and the black circles under his eyes were more prominent. When he opened them again, he was met by the least expected scene. Doctor Anderson in front of him with a friendly smile on his face. His expression was somewhat curious, yet disapproving at the same time. He was wearing a gray turtleneck sweater and black pants underneath the white doctor coat and Kurt thought that was the cutest thing he had seen in a while.

"Good morning, Kurt", Blaine greeted cheerfully. Kurt's felt his heart jump a little, but he didn't say anything. Kurt found it easier to be quiet most of the time. That way he wouldn't end up in trouble.

"Have you slept well?", Blaine continued. Kurt sighed slightly. Of course he cared about him, he was his doctor. It would be silly to think that Blaine cared about him in another way. And he was probably straight. But it was the white coat.. The appeal of the uniform. Everything about this adorable doctor just made Kurt want to jump his pants.

Kurt cleared his throat and exhaled the white smoke slowly.
"It was fine, I guess", he replied nonchalantly.

"I want my bed at home", he added before shutting his mouth. He was whining. He was whiny and irritable. He wanted to go home to get his drugs.

"And you will get your bed at home as soon as you are healed", Blaine didn't seem put off by Kurt's behaviour.

Blaine had worked with people like Kurt before. They get quite a few overdose cases at the hospitals. Most of the cases are kids trying drugs for the first time who react really badly to the intoxicating substance, but sometimes they had cases of hard core drug addicts. Blaine suspected that Kurt was one of the latter. He looked at the beautiful boy in front of him who was filling his lungs with tar. He looked beat up, rough and there was an animal-like aura to him, but under the dirt and smoke he was like a shining diamond. He was tall and lean and had a perfect build. His hands were smooth and felt like silk. Blaine felt like a total pervert, but he couldn't resist touching Kurt's hands when he was unconscious.

There was a shadow in Kurt's eyes. A shadow that spoke of loneliness and hurt. But from what? Blaine felt a need to help the beautiful boy in front of him. He couldn't allow that shadow to roam in those lovely eyes. Those eyes that danced in green, grey and blue in the sunlight.

"How did you get out here, Kurt? Did a nurse help you?", Blaine enquired curiously.

Kurt shook his head and a small, proud smile appeared.

"No, I did it by myself"

Blaine shook his head silently, even though the smile didn't fade.
"You shouldn't be doing this. You should be on your bed resting", he chided.

Kurt inhaled the last of his cigarette before throwing it on the floor. Doctor Anderson was so damned cute, but why did he have to criticize him like that? The irritation Kurt felt prior to this expanded and he found himself snapping and Blaine.

"I don't want to be treated like I'm dysfunctional. I am perfectly capable to walk around on my own, and a fucking cigarette is the least I can have when I'm caged in this hell hole!", he spat. He felt the anger inside of him grow and along with it, The Craving was suddenly present, clouding everything else.

Kurt started shaking, the abstinence taking its toll on him even though it had only been a day since his last hit. He knew that he was irritable because he couldn't have the usual dose he needed to get through the day. He was hungry, in pain and need a hit of coke. Or meth. Just something. The shaking became worse and Kurt had absolutely no control over it. He fell to his knees and his palms supported him up, even though his posture was broken. The worst thing was that all the shaking made Kurt's back hurt like hell. He was not ready for this. He couldn't go through this. How the hell did he end up in non-consensual rehabilitation? He. Needed. His. Drugs. And oh, the pain. It was all too much for Kurt and he tasted the salt water that trickled down his cheeks. He wanted to stay strong, but he couldn't stop the broken sobs that came from his chest.

Suddenly, Blaine kneeled in front of Kurt and forced Kurt to stop shaking by placing two firm hands on his shoulders. He held Kurt until he was done crying, with a pained expression on his face. It broke his heart to see Kurt like this. He could be more than 22 or 23. This beautiful boy had his whole life in front of him, and he it killed Blaine that he had to suffer this way. Blaine helped Kurt on his feet and supported him since Kurt had troubles standing without help.

The two men went inside without talking and Blaine help Kurt back to his bed before taking a seat beside him.
"You are experiencing withdrawal", Blaine stated lamely. He wanted to hit himself. Of course Kurt knew that he was going through withdrawal, he was the one experiencing it. He wished that he could do something, but he felt pretty helpless. As a doctor his hands were pretty tied. He couldn't give him drugs and there was no way he would discharge Kurt so fast.

Kurt looked up at the doctor with the best bitch please-look he had.
"Thank you for the information", he snarled.

Blaine cringed.
"Look, I know it is hard. But, it will be better. Maybe this is an opportunity for you to quit with the drugs permanently. Kurt looked at him as though he had suggested an amputation.

"Listen, doctor, I'm happy with my life, so don't try to change it".

Kurt marveled over how easy it was to lie. He had perfectionized the lie to the point of flawless. The truth was that his life was pathetic. But, he'd rather die than admit it.

Blaine sighed. Such a waste.

"How is your back?", he asked softly.

"'Tis a bitch", Kurt murmured and looked down. Blaine thought he looked absolutely adorable. But, he was still a patient and Blaine was still his doctor, he reminded himself.

"I'll give you more painkillers", Blaine replied and called for a nurse.

As the nurse fumbled with is IV, Blaine told Kurt that he would be back in an hour to check on him. On that note, he left, leaving Kurt with a good view to check out his ass.

"He is a sight for the sore eyes, isn't he?", the nurse sighed, checking out the doctor's butt as well.

Kurt sent her an amused smile.

"I pray night and day that he'd stop being gay", the nurse said, mostly to herself and fixed Kurt's painkillers. Kurt's expression went from smug to downright shocked. So the supermegafoxyawesome doctor was gay. How interesting..

The nurse left Kurt alone. He stared at the wall for a few minutes, not knowing what to do. Then, he found a pad of paper and a pen by his nightstand. Kurt started to draw, and the moment the pen touched the paper, Kurt forgot everything else in the world. He tuned out the world. Drugs did not exist. The Craving couldn't touch him. He even had a smile on his lips – a smile of content and achievement. And that was how Blaine found Kurt an hour later, sound asleep with a sketch in hand.

Kurt woke up a few hours later and hated the fact that he was alone. He wished that Doctor Anderson could be there with him, but Blaine was probably too busy saving lives. Was it bad that Kurt was turned on by the thought if Blaine saving lives? Probably yes. He even wished that Finn could be there, just to have some company. Sadly, Finn left a message that he wouldn't be able to visit before tomorrow. Feeling absolutely bored out of his mind, he watched TV for the rest of the day before falling asleep.

The next day Kurt woke up, disheveled and disoriented. He craned his neck to see if Doctor Anderson was at work. He had no such luck. It was going to be another long day.

Blaine Anderson had the day off and planned on reading the paper when he thought about a patient. It was not any patient. It was the none other than the patient that he couldn't stop thinking about for the past days. He was ashamed over the fact that he cared about a patient so much that he was thinking about him on his day off, but he couldn't do anything about it. It was a fragile boy with the most magical eyes he had seen. The prettiest lips and the softest hands. Kurt Hummel.

The name rolled off his tongue like warm honey, and he suppressed the smallest of sighs. Blaine sat down with his newspaper and cup of coffee. He lived alone in a two room apartment in the middle of New York. One could wonder why a boy from Ohio would want to live and work in such a big city like New York, but despite the humble personality, Blaine loved the city. He loved the smell of pollution, the sound of the city that never sleeps, the people that always hurry past you. He was in love with the life that possessed the city.

He moved from Westerville, Ohio when he started college, and he had no plans of going back ever. There was nothing left for him there. Nothing to return to. He had a group of friends in New York, a good paying job and a nice apartment. Another thing that would have been nice was someone to share the apartment with. Someone to share his life with. Despite the good looks and the great job, Blaine never could seem to find someone that he could share his life with. He had went on countless dates and had been set up with a various number of guys, but he just couldn't seem to find the one for him.

And when Blaine closed him eyes to savour his cup of coffee, the face of a certain Kurt Hummel came to mind.

Thank you so much for reading! I hope you like what you read : ) I would love to hear what YOU think about the story. Praise, critizim – Anything!